Susan's Place Transgender Resources

I'm three weeks post op. It hurts to walk and to sit for any length of time, but other than that, I'm usually comfortable.

Usually.

Here's what's happening. If I try to "sense" what my new parts are feeling like, something weird happens. I've only ever had a penis and testicles between my legs, so that seems to be what I "expect".  Being aware of my new bottom causes my brain to realize that my penis is no longer intact, and in fact has been sliced into several parts. My scrotum also has been severed and is very swollen. I'm suddenly aware of having been horribly injured. It feels like my penis has been torn and shredded and I'm aware of all sorts of painful sensations.

This seems to have the effect of "waking" up my new parts. I feel a painful tightness where my testicles used to be, not surprising considering they are still sutured over swollen and inflamed tissues. There's movement down there when that happens – like what used to happen when my testicles would change shape if I were cold or hot. This is painful and uncomfortable.

If I stop trying to sense what's going on down there, after a minute or two, the area becomes stable and the pain goes away. This isn't a problem as long as I ignore it all, but that's sort of like telling yourself not to think about elephants.

I'm not dysphoric about my new parts. I'm comfortable with the fact that I have a female bottom, and that my male parts have been repurposed, but it's frustrating that when I try to be aware of them I'm treated with a really unpleasant experience.

Has anyone else felt anything like this?

How long did it last?

I may be talking thru my bonnet.. but in some respects.  could it be like phantom limb pain/feeling amputees get (without ever knowing what that's like)?  Once you stop thinking abt it, the feeling goes away?  Just guessing on my part..   I hope the pain goes quickly!

I'm glad you're not dysphoric; that's great news!

I had that sort of thing for a couple of days after surgery, and then something "clicked" and I could sense everything positioned correctly and the nerve signals were telling me accurate information again ("your inner labia ache" as opposed to "your left testicle is itchy"). However, I've heard from quite a few post-op women that this stage lasted longer for them, up to a few months, and that I was lucky it was so abbreviated. So the good news is it WILL pass, specifically because it's an issue with your brain rewiring to recognize the nerves rather than a problem located in the parts themselves; the bad news is, it might be a while, and I'm so sorry about the unfairness of it in the meantime.

Me it was maybe around 3 months for things to calm down.

Have to remember everything has been pulled down and then inside so a lot of tension is there.

I had a lot of spermatic cord pain on one side. Very unpleasant but that in time has calmed down also.

Just need the time for things to heal up, and that can be up to a year.

I am 15 months and still have moments that reminds me i had surgery.

Izzy

edit added tip: ware panties a size or two larger then normal.

Mine calmed down and felt normal after a couple weeks. By now everything's associated correctly... And everything just feels *natural*. Like, swelling aside, it was meant to be.

Quote from: Jenna Marie on July 12, 2014, 09:13:00 AM
I had that sort of thing for a couple of days after surgery, and then something "clicked" and I could sense everything positioned correctly and the nerve signals were telling me accurate information again ("your inner labia ache" as opposed to "your left testicle is itchy"). However, I've heard from quite a few post-op women that this stage lasted longer for them, up to a few months, and that I was lucky it was so abbreviated.

This was really helpful. I'm trying to probe myself gently with my fingers to give me a better idea of what part goes with what sensation. It's a really good way to pass the time while I'm lying on my back with a dilator sticking out. I'm hoping this will help me understand what feeling goes where. I'm also ignoring any sensation that seems to come from my penis, assigning it to a spot somewhere safely deep inside me. Since I had an inversion, that's probably pretty close to accurate.

We'll see.

I'm glad it helped! I wouldn't be surprised if touching everything helped, especially with a mirror - I know it was useful for me to *see* where the nerve signals were initiating, so my eyes at least could try to convince my brain that it was a spot on the labia or whatever. As long as it doesn't make the uncomfortable sensations worse for you, too, it can't hurt...

The other weird thing is that the nerves didn't necessarily all go where the skin did (like, some of my penile nerves are now redirected towards my labia, or so my operations report says), so don't be alarmed if the new sensations don't match up to where you know tissue was used.

Quote from: mind is quiet now on July 12, 2014, 09:27:41 AM

Just need the time for things to heal up, and that can be up to a year.

I am 15 months and still have moments that reminds me i had surgery.

That's all correct, up to a year to fully heal, or more than a year in my case, I had a labiaplasty procedure done 8 weeks after my SRS, so my healing took longer, nearly 18 months for my vagina to feel and look normal, it does take time for a girl to heal, but it does pass, you'll look back less than 2 years from now and feel all the pain was worth the gain.

Tomorrow is officially 18 months Post Op for me, and it took until this time last year for my touch nerves to be 100% accurate in what they were sending to my brain.  Considering my age, some of it could just have been approaching senility that slowed things down.  Beginning at 7 months, some of the area became ticklish, but with only a promise of eventual pleasure every now and then.  It was only a month ago that stroking my vulvar area outside began to pleasantly involve ALL of my modified anatomy and just adjusting my underwear is now pleasant if I am not too moist from sweat.

Agreed, do use COTTON underwear about 2 sizes to big for some time to come. 

From neuroscience: the brain adapts best when focused on repeating goal / tasks. Visual feedback will help a lot at the start as the proprioception / sensory nerves are misplaced. Over time learn to lay back and relax and use more mental imagery.

At least that's my plan after my operation at end of July.