General Discussions => General discussions => ARGHHH! => Topic started by: Annabella on July 14, 2014, 04:01:12 PM Return to Full Version
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Post by: Annabella on July 14, 2014, 04:01:12 PM
Post by: Annabella on July 14, 2014, 04:01:12 PM
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Title: Re: Trapped at my SO's place :(
Post by: muffinpants on July 15, 2014, 01:04:09 PM
Post by: muffinpants on July 15, 2014, 01:04:09 PM
Heya Annabella
After reading through some of your previous posts, I am left so confused about the status of your relationship! Are yall still technically a couple? What I'm getting from it is that she wants to be a couple while at the same time not being a couple. It sounds like she has some serious issues she needs to work through and I think some of the things she says are so mean and hurtful, I don't know how you can stand it. :( She can't see, to see past herself. Is she monetarily reliant on you? Is there anyway you can get out of the situation? I know yall have been together a while, but honestly this just sounds unhealthy for both of you... whatever happens, try not to let her pettiness get to you. Good luck.
After reading through some of your previous posts, I am left so confused about the status of your relationship! Are yall still technically a couple? What I'm getting from it is that she wants to be a couple while at the same time not being a couple. It sounds like she has some serious issues she needs to work through and I think some of the things she says are so mean and hurtful, I don't know how you can stand it. :( She can't see, to see past herself. Is she monetarily reliant on you? Is there anyway you can get out of the situation? I know yall have been together a while, but honestly this just sounds unhealthy for both of you... whatever happens, try not to let her pettiness get to you. Good luck.
Title: Re: Trapped at my SO's place :(
Post by: YinYanga on July 15, 2014, 01:26:22 PM
Post by: YinYanga on July 15, 2014, 01:26:22 PM
I really admire your resolve, it all sounds so conflicting what she tells you. Are the things she says like "You shaved but that doesnt look femme" constructive critisism or are those manipulative comments to you?
I don't think I would be able to put up with someone like that for a day, a a week let alone years..I'm far too upfront for that
I don't think I would be able to put up with someone like that for a day, a a week let alone years..I'm far too upfront for that
Title: Re: Trapped at my SO's place :(
Post by: YinYanga on July 15, 2014, 01:34:50 PM
Post by: YinYanga on July 15, 2014, 01:34:50 PM
Is there a possibllity to actually get you two talking? It doesnt seem like a nice, neutral environment to be in. What about counselling?
Title: Re: Trapped at my SO's place :(
Post by: RockerGirl on July 15, 2014, 01:53:42 PM
Post by: RockerGirl on July 15, 2014, 01:53:42 PM
Hugs, sorry it's so tough hun. Hang in there!
Title: Re: Trapped at my SO's place :(
Post by: YinYanga on July 15, 2014, 02:01:36 PM
Post by: YinYanga on July 15, 2014, 02:01:36 PM
She's not willing to talk about your gender issues as a couple with a (gender) therapist perhaps? I can understand some of her anti-therapy stance since Ive had too much of that in the last 10 years aswell but if it's with and for someone else you sometimes have to set asides your personal issue with it
Title: Re: Trapped at my SO's place :(
Post by: muffinpants on July 15, 2014, 02:12:29 PM
Post by: muffinpants on July 15, 2014, 02:12:29 PM
Yikes, sounds like a rough situation. To me, it sounds like she wants to have her cake and eat it too. She's able to sleep around, yet rely on you for emotional and financial support. Perhaps she should try to figure out a way to stand on her own two feet if she has no interest in a romantic relationship with you? You are far too kind to her! Sounds like she needs to experience the real world.
Title: Re: Trapped at my SO's place :(
Post by: YinYanga on July 15, 2014, 02:21:32 PM
Post by: YinYanga on July 15, 2014, 02:21:32 PM
Quote from: muffinpants on July 15, 2014, 02:12:29 PM
Yikes, sounds like a rough situation. To me, it sounds like she wants to have her cake and eat it too. She's able to sleep around, yet rely on you for emotional and financial support. Perhaps she should try to figure out a way to stand on her own two feet if she has no interest in a romantic relationship with you? You are far too kind to her! Sounds like she needs to experience the real world.
Yes, perhaps its way past the talking stage. Time to take out the thrash
Title: Re: Trapped at my SO's place :(
Post by: YinYanga on July 15, 2014, 05:38:45 PM
Post by: YinYanga on July 15, 2014, 05:38:45 PM
She probably secretly visited Susans on her phone while lying on bed thinking "Darn...angry girls, lock the doors fast!" ;D
But seriously...I am happy it was such a turnaround, looks likes she needed all that sleep to get her spirit back. I hope it won't go back to the bad ways of the last days however. Keep talking regularly
Title: Re: Trapped at my SO's place :(
Post by: RockerGirl on July 16, 2014, 06:43:24 PM
Post by: RockerGirl on July 16, 2014, 06:43:24 PM
Well I guess at least it got a little better for you once she got some sleep! Hope she continues to open up to you and accept you. And herself! That's so wild that she is transgender too