Susan's Place Transgender Resources

well, In my life time starting in grade school I'm guessing probably at least ten times, but maybe more. And one major purge of a good size wardrobe ,make up wig , shoes , coat.

Once. That was in 1991/92? after I abandoned my first attempt at transition. :(

Fortunately it wasn't an entire wardrobe.

Quote from: Ms Grace on July 29, 2014, 04:23:22 PM
Once. That was in 1991/92? after I abandoned my first attempt at transition. :(

Fortunately it wasn't an entire wardrobe.

yea , kind of a waste

I'd say I purged about 7-8 times, threw everything away and "manned up", lasted anywhere from a week to 5 years but in the end I always gravitated back until I embraced the part of me that I had denied and neglected.

Susan's and all of you were in no small way to thank for that, you inspired me to accept myself and decide to become a whole person.

I must be the oddball here.

I never had anything to purge.  After transition I did purge my guy clothes though.  :D

I dunno, I never really owned any of my own feminine clothes until last year. Prior to that I did do some 'borrowing' on occasion, but would put the clothes back perfectly as they were before. I was extremely cautious as I did not want to ever be caught. Having my set of things stashed somewhere secretly would have made that difficult.

I have purged online identities before though (at least 2-3 times). Does that count?

at least 10 times  :(

Quote from: Alaia on July 29, 2014, 04:55:55 PM
I dunno, I never really owned any of my own feminine clothes until last year. Prior to that I did do some 'borrowing' on occasion, but would put the clothes back perfectly as they were before. I was extremely cautious as I did not want to ever be caught. Having my set of things stashed somewhere secretly would have made that difficult.

I have purged online identities before though (at least 2-3 times). Does that count?

If it's trans related your ok

Fifty.  No kidding.

What's a purge?

from 14 to 20, like a million times

Quote from: Juliett on July 29, 2014, 11:15:06 PM
What's a purge?

When you throw out your women's clothes.

Probably 5 times, give or take.

For me, it wasn't clothes, though, it was just my collection of transgender fiction that I wrote. I've deleted them, told them I was never going to write transgender fiction again, and then subsequently re-written the exact same story all over again, at least 4 times.

I also did one big purge where I threw out my collection of ACE bandage and fish-tank tubing that I used for genital tucking with sit-down urination, plus threw out my water-balloon-boob collection along with it. (I used to stick water balloons in my shirt and leave them in all day to simulate having boobs, and even slept in them several times.)

Quote from: Carrie Liz on July 30, 2014, 01:28:38 AM
(I used to stick water balloons in my shirt and leave them in all day to simulate having boobs, and even slept in them several times.)

I used to do that too..It gave me such a feeling of relief, when I would model in front of the mirror. I'm glad those days are long behind me.

Quote from: Carrie Liz on July 30, 2014, 01:28:38 AM
Probably 5 times, give or take.

For me, it wasn't clothes, though, it was just my collection of transgender fiction that I wrote. I've deleted them, told them I was never going to write transgender fiction again, and then subsequently re-written the exact same story all over again, at least 4 times.

I also did one big purge where I threw out my collection of ACE bandage and fish-tank tubing that I used for genital tucking with sit-down urination, plus threw out my water-balloon-boob collection along with it. (I used to stick water balloons in my shirt and leave them in all day to simulate having boobs, and even slept in them several times.)

Repressed memory time.  Tried to forget this ever happened, but...

Summer camp 1981 (I was 12.) 

OK  so there was this water balloon fight, I had a tent to myself because everyone decided I was like totally way too lame to so much as even be seen with, let alone like share a tent.

So anyway, I tossed some of the balloons in the backpack because I was getting super jealous of or attracted to (yes, attracted to- that's it...  :P) of the girls who were lucky enough to start looking like I wished I could. 

One perk of being ostracized was the opportunity to put them under my shirt unnoticed in my tent.  The downside was when one shortly popped inside my sleeping bag.

Having to explain the still-wet sleeping bag the next day was also awesome.  I was just glad that the last day of camp had passed and I'd never see any of these horrible kids ever again.

I wonder now how many more fuzzy memories that I have like this.

Only once, and I have regretted it ever since. Lost a few really nice bits of clothing that had taken a lot of effort to get. A gorgeous black linen dress and a knitted cardigan I miss immensely.

Curse you teenage insecurity! Ah well, they probably wouldn't fit me nowadays.

Not sure, I'll just list it as several though

Quote from: Carrie Liz on July 30, 2014, 01:28:38 AM
plus threw out my water-balloon-boob collection along with it. (I used to stick water balloons in my shirt and leave them in all day to simulate having boobs, and even slept in them several times.)

I tried that once, even sleeping in them, but they burst

I was purging nearly every year, disposing of clothes, underwear, breast forms, even a noogleberry pump

Quote from: Carrie Liz on July 30, 2014, 01:28:38 AM
Probably 5 times, give or take.

For me, it wasn't clothes, though, it was just my collection of transgender fiction that I wrote. I've deleted them, told them I was never going to write transgender fiction again, and then subsequently re-written the exact same story all over again, at least 4 times.

I also did one big purge where I threw out my collection of ACE bandage and fish-tank tubing that I used for genital tucking with sit-down urination, plus threw out my water-balloon-boob collection along with it. (I used to stick water balloons in my shirt and leave them in all day to simulate having boobs, and even slept in them several times.)

yes,  the balloons felt quite natural. they fit perfectly in this really nice bra I got from a thrift store . It was perfect made me feel I had natural boobs, but I lost that bra in a purge

more than a few times from the teens on. A few times, I just gave stuff to my sister and then got it back later, lol.

I only had a small hiding place so I didn't have all that much but I never threw away everything. I would throw things away (or return lol) to make room for new stuff I got though. Then I found a much bigger hiding place and still got tons of stuff in there.

Quote from: Jaime R D on July 30, 2014, 10:39:41 AM
more than a few times from the teens on. A few times, I just gave stuff to my sister and then got it back later, lol.

yes, a memory just came back when you said that, I bought my first dress when I was 20. The problem was I was too skinny and the dress didn't seem to look right on me , but now looking back I think it was  warped perception. I gave it to my sister.

I think I purged 3-5 times before I finally got it right lol

Quote from: Jill F on July 29, 2014, 04:46:05 PM
I must be the oddball here.

I never had anything to purge.  After transition I did purge my guy clothes though.  :D

^^^^^This.  Though I did occasionally try crossing dressing secretly borrowing clothes it was very rare as it'd just act as a trigger

Quote from: Carrie Liz on July 30, 2014, 01:28:38 AM
For me, it wasn't clothes, though, it was just my collection of transgender fiction that I wrote. I've deleted them, told them I was never going to write transgender fiction again, and then subsequently re-written the exact same story all over again, at least 4 times.

I'd go through phases of reading fictionmania quite a lot, probably trying to convince myself I just had some sort of weird fetish...

A couple of times I purged! Especially at uni, as I couldnt deal with the transgendered feelings then . . . And it was much easier just to fool myself into thinking I was just a crossdresser!!

I also remember one massive purge when id just started at college!! I threw a whole wardrobe of clothes away!!! Just because I felt they were holding me back :( it kind of hurts to think back to those moments now :/

I think the main reason in my purges were just that the time wasnt right to start my transition, as I was living with my parents. Or I was ar uni!!!!

As soon I was in a position where I had some money, and had moved away from the family home, I was able to spend more time as zoe, and realisedhow much more comfortable I feel living as a woman!! :)

Xx

I only purged once and that was when I was about thirteen. My mother had purchased some female clothes for me, she was always quite understanding. At the time I hadn't quite come to grips with being transgender, I believe I had never even heard of the term at that point in time. Anyways, like some people, I threw it out and tried to overcompensate by being incredibly masculine during the day. However, at night I would pray that I would wake up girl. That was definitely a dark time in my life...

Just once. But it wasn't really a purge, per se. It was me giving my ex-fiance her stuff back in the ever so awkard stuff exchange that occurs after break ups. This was five months after and was me saying to her "Hey, I was just joking. I'm not really intersex nor do I want surgery. Was just pulling your chain for three and a half years.Gunny stuff, huh?" Of cours,e she saw me naked and knew without a shadow of a doubt I'm IS. I identify as a queer woman though and just approach transition as a necessary medical procedure to make me the best person I can be and to get rid of my androgyny. I loved my androgyny, but now I just want to be totally female.

I also took T which deepened my voice some, though even now I get ma'amed on the phone. The worst was the facial hair. Ugh, what a mistake. So, I think this counts as a purge. A really long one with horrendous consequences. But now everything is getting back on track!!! And I'm only early 30s.

Quote from: Joanna Dark on July 30, 2014, 05:58:30 PM
Just once. But it wasn't really a purge, per se. It was me giving my ex-fiance her stuff back in the ever so awkard stuff exchange that occurs after break ups. This was five months after and was me saying to her "Hey, I was just joking. I'm not really intersex nor do I want surgery. Was just pulling your chain for three and a half years.Gunny stuff, huh?" Of cours,e she saw me naked and knew without a shadow of a doubt I'm IS. I identify as a queer woman though and just approach transition as a necessary medical procedure to make me the best person I can be and to get rid of my androgyny. I loved my androgyny, but now I just want to be totally female.

I also took T which deepened my voice some, though even now I get ma'amed on the phone. The worst was the facial hair. Ugh, what a mistake. So, I think this counts as a purge. A really long one with horrendous consequences. But now everything is getting back on track!!! And I'm only early 30s.

sounds like a purge

Quote from: Zoe Louise Taylor on July 30, 2014, 01:37:58 PM
A couple of times I purged! Especially at uni, as I couldnt deal with the transgendered feelings then . . . And it was much easier just to fool myself into thinking I was just a crossdresser!!

I also remember one massive purge when id just started at college!! I threw a whole wardrobe of clothes away!!! Just because I felt they were holding me back :( it kind of hurts to think back to those moments now :/

I think the main reason in my purges were just that the time wasnt right to start my transition, as I was living with my parents. Or I was ar uni!!!!

Very similar to me in a way, although for me the purge was when I was finishing uni, as after uni it was back living with my parents again, and because neither of them worked, there would be very little opportunity to feel comfortable again.

Besides my purges of throwing away items, I also did what some others on here have done, and gave some of my clothes away. Those clothes that I did give away were to my wife, if they were in her size.