Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Seriously, before I transitioned it seemed no one could be bothered talking to me at work functions. Now everyone is so friendly and complimentary. It's so different... I'm not complaining but it's almost beyond my experience. Surely they've been paid...?? Surely!

Conversation is the "pay off" of being yourself. And lovely.

It's probably a corporate conspiracy .

Quote from: Ms Grace on July 31, 2014, 07:12:39 AM
Seriously, before I transitioned it seemed no one could be bothered talking to me at work functions. Now everyone is so friendly and complimentary. It's so different... I'm not complaining but it's almost beyond my experience. Surely they've been paid...?? Surely!

Ah yeah, that was me, I have a habit of throwing money around sometimes and thought you could use a nicer environment.

If it's any consolation, your co-workers are surprisingly cheap to purchase...

Grace

Folk are attracted to happy people who are celebrating life and themselves.  You are radiating positive vibes - they are being drawn to your happiness.  Suspect that money is not changing hands.

Aisla

Weird isn't it. Walked out of a meeting and had to travel across the city, one of the other women caught me and asked if I wanted a coffee.

We talked about relationships for an hour or so, turning off our pages constantly.

More important stuff to talk about. :laugh:

Don't question - enjoy. Hopefully it only gets better as they get to know the real you.

Hugs,

Grace, you practically radiate charisma. Of course they all want to talk to you. :)

Given you don't work in the private sector Grace, I don't think money came into it.

Seriously, as the others have said already, people want to talk to positive and interesting people - and you fit the bill.

Happy days ahead!  :D

Its definitely you that paid everyone off by radiating happiness  :)

I have noticed that Eva gets far more of this positive attention than her alter ego male persona ever did. It's weird, isn't it?

I second the positive vibe thing, just look at your infectious happy smile! How could anyone not want to smile back and be nice to you?  :)

Per your original thoughts Grace,

In the early 90's when I was working at a very large construction company in the art department I had a coworker needing to come out as trans, so she went to turn in her resignation as she thought it would be impossible to work there as she transitioned. Quite the opposite happened and the CEO and upper management said no problem at all and sent out company wide memo's stating that all employees should respect and be courteous to her or they will be dealt with accordingly.

It all went very well and even the toughest men on the crews were kind and polite :)

25 years later we still keep in touch and she was mildly surprised but not totally shocked to hear my news ;)

We are much better and happier people when we are no longer hiding a damn big elephant under our front room rug.  The elephant lump has kept us in a muffled corner where no one could see us or hear us or know much of us.  The housecleaning of transition and open presentation puts us in the center of the room, with good light and great acoustics, and that is a payoff we give other people. 

Not a big surprise there.   I'm much more sociable after being able to show the world who I truly am as well.  It sure beats wearing the a*hole mask 24/7.

From my own observations I would say girls are more chatty with each other than guys are. I think its more of a sign that you pass 100%.

It has been said already on this thread, but I will iterate:  Authenticity is attractive; you are authentic.  Maybe it is the influence of living in OZ, but the power that flows from the south and west towards the west coast of the USA brings hope and joy.  One of these days I will show up, just to bask in the sunshine of your spirit, the bounty of the amazing and brilliant men and women from down under that I have come to rely on, and the energy that streams from your coasts.

Probably have to do some barbie on the coast too ;)

Now if there just weren't so many bitie things with sharp teeth, fangs, and jaws there.

Julie

Grace, you are just SO positive, for one thing...

Second, I think that people just ASSUME females are more open to chat openly...

Many girls here in this thread have basically stated this, in various ways.

I am early on in my HRT, just 6 1/2 weeks, but as my body feminizes more and more, i certainly hope to have this great 'side benefit" of presenting as female most of the time...successfully...that people, both male and female, just naturally "open up" more to a female, than to a male.

Congratulations on the great increased attention you are getting!

Living your life openly and honesty with no more secrets probably is showing through strongly, too, and people are sensing this...

Hugs as always, you are great here,

Johanna.

Quote from: Pikachu on July 31, 2014, 07:58:58 AM
Grace, you practically radiate charisma. Of course they all want to talk to you. :)

I am thinking this exactly

It's cost me a fortune.
I will send the bill to you later.

J

I swear it wasn't me! Okay maybe it was... :P

But as others have said I think you give off a very positive vibe and being able to just be you without having to pretend is amazing!

@Michelle

I love that story, I'm happy it worked out for her how it did. If only it could be like that everywhere. :)

That is fantastic to hear how others interact and talk to you now as opposed to pre transition. I agree, you have a lot going, personality being a strong suit.

The same thing has been happening to me at work, it's almost hard to deal with in some ways to be honest but in a good way. I really didn't expect people to warm up to me right out of the box when I went full time and went to work on that 1st day. I work in a factory with just over 1000 people and I get stopped in the hall all the time. Most cases it's for someone to say they really respect me for what I'm doing because they can't fathom how difficult transitioning publicly is and how brave I am or how happy they are for me being myself. Funny thing is it's hard to shut me up now when I start talking, could never say that before as I'd be a one word sentence type of person and run away lol. 

I dont know if its the same but while i get called freak by one lovely soul the rest of the women are friendly and have several good friends. 
Im just a better communicator and such a better person than Ive ever been now that I like me.

Its just the inner peace I suppose?

Happy for you

I've noticed the same thing, since starting to transition. Women seem to be friendlier to me now. I attribute this to my having a feminine-looking face, which may make them feel more at ease with me, though I don't completely pass, yet. I've been using estradiol for 11 months.

Quote from: Danniella on July 31, 2014, 07:16:50 AM
Ah yeah, that was me, I have a habit of throwing money around sometimes and thought you could use a nicer environment.

If it's any consolation, your co-workers are surprisingly cheap to purchase...

I knew it!!!

Quote from: Jenny07 on July 31, 2014, 04:30:20 PM
It's cost me a fortune.
I will send the bill to you later.

J

Well, thanks... but don't expect me to return the favour! ;D

The common response from people seems to be that I'm much happier now, which is true but surely I wasn't that big a sad sack of crap to begin with?? Yeah, probably I was now that I think about it. I was very unenthusiastic and cynical about everything. I notice my body language, especially when I'm talking is a lot more engaged... etc!

Grace, indeed, when one is happy because one's outside reflects what is inside for example, I think it shows.

For me, already just short of 7 weeks in which is still early on, I too notice that even when I react to regative things, it is much more subdued than previously, E and especialy P apparently calm me SO much, and all of my relationships are better than before I started HRT.  It sounds similar for many girls here, and you too.

I find that for me, these mental changes are even more amazing than the physical changes.  Sure, I was expecting at least SOME physical changes but even those have been like WOW (no more body odor, palms of my hands already silky smooth like that of a 25 year old cis girl, no more facial acne, my hair starting to grow nicely in my natural light medium brown color, and most important my "girls" and nipples are for sure now and are hurting sometimes so I think they will grow more right away)...

But the mental changes are stunning for me, and many of the changes are similar to what you describe for yourself.

I thought that, ok, I "understand there will be mental changes" at an intellectual level.  Never in my wildest dreams did I see these feelings about how first-hand experience with this would be rapidly change me -- and the euphoric happiness seems to follow me nearly always, even when I get any (rare) negative news, I am emotionally in great shape.

This includes exuding "positive-ness" I think...which you allude to also.

Maybe people just sense this, and want to talk more to an enthusiastic, happy person than to a cynical person.

Plus, I think people in nearly every country just assume that females want to talk more than males.  This is a "nice" stereotype which helps us "new" girls ('newly" girls on the outside, anyway, and then this maybe helps us feel more feminine on the inside, too).

Plus, females in general I think, in any country, are regarded as less "threatening" than males -- which helps to elicit a great quantity and quality of spontaneous conversation that last longer than just, "Hello, how are you?"

The world treasts female more gently than males, in so many regards.

Embraces Grace,
Johanna.

Quote from: JohannaJohn on August 01, 2014, 07:57:42 AM

Maybe people just sense this, and want to talk more to an enthusiastic, happy person than to a cynical person.

Johanna.

This ^^___^^ I definitely agree with and can relate to. I've noticed the same thing especially around the time my hrt began softening my face and giving it a more feminine appearance.

Allie :icon_flower: