Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Male to female transsexual talk (MTF) => Topic started by: luna nyan on August 01, 2014, 08:39:02 PM Return to Full Version
Title: Waiting room wink wink or silent treatment? :)
Post by: luna nyan on August 01, 2014, 08:39:02 PM
Post by: luna nyan on August 01, 2014, 08:39:02 PM
As my endo sees a lot of patients who are trans, when I have my appointments, there's a 70% chance that I'm usually waiting around with a trans patient in the reception area. Often these people are early in the process and it can be pretty obvious.
I usually just give the person a quick glance, mentally catalogue what the person is wearing (working out whether it works well or not) and then retreat into my phone. Being reverse stealth, I don't do much else, although I suspect some people would be wondering what someone in my age group is doing seeing an endo.
That had me wondering what others here do? Quiet acknowledgement or just pretend you don't notice?
I usually just give the person a quick glance, mentally catalogue what the person is wearing (working out whether it works well or not) and then retreat into my phone. Being reverse stealth, I don't do much else, although I suspect some people would be wondering what someone in my age group is doing seeing an endo.
That had me wondering what others here do? Quiet acknowledgement or just pretend you don't notice?
Title: Re: Waiting room wink wink or silent treatment? :)
Post by: Jessica Merriman on August 01, 2014, 08:42:59 PM
Post by: Jessica Merriman on August 01, 2014, 08:42:59 PM
HRT has made me an very outgoing girl. I will start a conversation with anyone who will listen. ;D I have run into a couple others and just treat them like the women they are. I will comment on their shoes, purse, dresses or anything else. It is great and makes both of us at ease. If the other person looks worried or scared it really gives them a confidence boost. I have met two who I call frequently now. :)
Title: Re: Waiting room wink wink or silent treatment? :)
Post by: Jenny07 on August 01, 2014, 08:43:20 PM
Post by: Jenny07 on August 01, 2014, 08:43:20 PM
I had a good chat to Grace while waiting to see Dr H a while ago.
Quite a few of us go to see him.
Next appointment on Monday. See what happens
Often see others with family which is very encouraging.
J
Quite a few of us go to see him.
Next appointment on Monday. See what happens
Often see others with family which is very encouraging.
J
Title: Re: Waiting room wink wink or silent treatment? :)
Post by: Ms Grace on August 01, 2014, 08:51:45 PM
Post by: Ms Grace on August 01, 2014, 08:51:45 PM
I quickly learned it was best to try and get Dr H's very first appointment of the day... which means I rarely see anyone else waiting now. Before that though it was fairly 'obvious' (to me, anyway) who the trans clients were, but I was in guy mode then so I figured they would prefer I didn't acknowledge them in any secret handshake way. These days I'd be happy to strike up a conversation in the waiting room with any other trans person if they were so inclined.
Title: Re: Waiting room wink wink or silent treatment? :)
Post by: Joan on August 01, 2014, 08:54:00 PM
Post by: Joan on August 01, 2014, 08:54:00 PM
I'm in the Jessica camp. Gosh it's hot today. I really like your shoes. Would you like some chocolate?
The receptionists are very chatty too. I like my trips to the gender clinic.
The receptionists are very chatty too. I like my trips to the gender clinic.
Title: Re: Waiting room wink wink or silent treatment? :)
Post by: Jessica Merriman on August 01, 2014, 09:02:14 PM
Post by: Jessica Merriman on August 01, 2014, 09:02:14 PM
Quote from: Joan on August 01, 2014, 08:54:00 PMMine also at the Psychology Department at the University. When I first started going she was scared to death of me (male mode). Now 10 months later (girl life) I get hugs every visit! It drives my male Therapist nuts because we girl talk about him quietly and point while giggling! ^-^
The receptionists are very chatty too. I like my trips to the gender clinic.
Title: Re: Waiting room wink wink or silent treatment? :)
Post by: immortal gypsy on August 01, 2014, 09:15:04 PM
Post by: immortal gypsy on August 01, 2014, 09:15:04 PM
I'm curled up in the corner 3/4 asleep keeping half aware on what's going on around me. Only coming back to bright and cheerful life again when my name is called.
Title: Re: Waiting room wink wink or silent treatment? :)
Post by: luna nyan on August 01, 2014, 09:59:23 PM
Post by: luna nyan on August 01, 2014, 09:59:23 PM
Grace, Jenny,
Kinda funny how we all lined up to see him within a week of each other. Should just make the appointments at the same time and have a cuppa after some time :P
Kinda funny how we all lined up to see him within a week of each other. Should just make the appointments at the same time and have a cuppa after some time :P
Title: Re: Waiting room wink wink or silent treatment? :)
Post by: Lonicera on August 01, 2014, 10:17:05 PM
Post by: Lonicera on August 01, 2014, 10:17:05 PM
I'm more of a 'quietly try to not have a panic attack in the corner' type of person. I tend to quickly give a shy smile to people so I expect I come across as quite cold and reserved when the waiting room is full but it's not due to lack of desire to talk. I'm just a tad overwhelmed by proximity to multiple people in such an important place.
Title: Re: Waiting room wink wink or silent treatment? :)
Post by: Jenny07 on August 01, 2014, 10:20:26 PM
Post by: Jenny07 on August 01, 2014, 10:20:26 PM
Quote from: luna nyan on August 01, 2014, 09:59:23 PM
Grace, Jenny,
Kinda funny how we all lined up to see him within a week of each other. Should just make the appointments at the same time and have a cuppa after some time :P
Doing our best to do just that.
Makes it just that little less scary.
I agree about the panic attack. Went into overdrive the first time I saw my GP and Dr H.
Title: Re: Waiting room wink wink or silent treatment? :)
Post by: AnonyMs on August 01, 2014, 10:37:20 PM
Post by: AnonyMs on August 01, 2014, 10:37:20 PM
I find it all very awkward and just sit there reading my phone. Its not that I mind talking, its just that I can't imagine how to start a conversation with someone I don't know in such a situation. So much scope for it going badly. I doubt its obvious why I'm there and its easier just to hide. I'm not seeing Dr Hays again for another couple of months or so, so it looks like I'm on a different schedule to everyone else.
Title: Re: Waiting room wink wink or silent treatment? :)
Post by: Asniceasme on August 02, 2014, 03:31:02 AM
Post by: Asniceasme on August 02, 2014, 03:31:02 AM
Quote from: luna nyan on August 01, 2014, 09:59:23 PM
Grace, Jenny,
Kinda funny how we all lined up to see him within a week of each other. Should just make the appointments at the same time and have a cuppa after some time :P
If I remember who the Sydneysiders are on here, I have to make my first appointment with Dr H soon. A couple of questions, would it be better to do it in the afternoon/evening after work, or on a day off? Also, what generally happens in that first appointment?
Title: Re: Waiting room wink wink or silent treatment? :)
Post by: Ms Grace on August 02, 2014, 03:50:43 AM
Post by: Ms Grace on August 02, 2014, 03:50:43 AM
Asniceasme, as to when you make the appointment will depend on where you are making the appointment for. Dr Hayes works out of Bondi Junction on Monday afternoons only. He also works out of St Leonards and (so I believe) one other location, but I don't know the times or days he is available. I do know that he is generally very busy so the first appointment will probably be for the first available. I actually made an appointment to see him before I had my referral, his waiting list was six weeks when I started seeing him a year ago - I knew the referral was imminent - they don't need the referral for you to make the appointment but you absolutely need to make sure you have it when you show up. I saved about two weeks that way.
Dr H is a nice friendly supportive guy. For the first appointment he might ask you a few general questions about your treatment with your psychiatrist, and how you are going gender wise and, based on the referral letter, how you would like to proceed. He will ask you questions about your health and family health history. He'll want to know the basics, like whether you smoke, drink, general health, any history of cancer, heart disease, etc. He'll want to know if you've been self medicating and any other medication you're on. He'll take your blood pressure, height and weight. He'll examine your chest and any gland development there, and he'll most likely examine your testicles for size and any irregularities (this helps determine how much of a T factory you're likely to have down there!)... and then he'll write you out a fasting blood test which you'll have to take in the morning. Once you've had that test then you'll need to see him again, that's when he'll discuss medication and HRT. The good news you can usually get in to see him again much quicker than the first time - I think I was able to see him again about a week and a half after my first appointment.
Dr H is a nice friendly supportive guy. For the first appointment he might ask you a few general questions about your treatment with your psychiatrist, and how you are going gender wise and, based on the referral letter, how you would like to proceed. He will ask you questions about your health and family health history. He'll want to know the basics, like whether you smoke, drink, general health, any history of cancer, heart disease, etc. He'll want to know if you've been self medicating and any other medication you're on. He'll take your blood pressure, height and weight. He'll examine your chest and any gland development there, and he'll most likely examine your testicles for size and any irregularities (this helps determine how much of a T factory you're likely to have down there!)... and then he'll write you out a fasting blood test which you'll have to take in the morning. Once you've had that test then you'll need to see him again, that's when he'll discuss medication and HRT. The good news you can usually get in to see him again much quicker than the first time - I think I was able to see him again about a week and a half after my first appointment.
Title: Re: Waiting room wink wink or silent treatment? :)
Post by: Jenny07 on August 02, 2014, 04:06:38 AM
Post by: Jenny07 on August 02, 2014, 04:06:38 AM
Grace/Asniceasme
I actually got a blood test done with my GP before seeing him. She knew what to look for so it saved making another appointment.
I like my GP as she was so good and was easy to talk to about this. She organised it all for me and all I had to do was to turn up the Dr H and he had all the details he needed.
Dr Robertson at Darlinghurst Clinic.
After the first appointment I had a script for E. I was stunned.
He did ask if I wanted to think about it. Would you need to think about it?
For me, not on my life.
Magic.
Also being prepared helped greatly.
I actually got a blood test done with my GP before seeing him. She knew what to look for so it saved making another appointment.
I like my GP as she was so good and was easy to talk to about this. She organised it all for me and all I had to do was to turn up the Dr H and he had all the details he needed.
Dr Robertson at Darlinghurst Clinic.
After the first appointment I had a script for E. I was stunned.
He did ask if I wanted to think about it. Would you need to think about it?
For me, not on my life.
Magic.
Also being prepared helped greatly.
Title: Re: Waiting room wink wink or silent treatment? :)
Post by: JulieBlair on August 02, 2014, 04:12:31 AM
Post by: JulieBlair on August 02, 2014, 04:12:31 AM
Is everyone here from OZ? That's it, I'm moving. Jessica, want to come too?
Title: Re: Waiting room wink wink or silent treatment? :)
Post by: Ms Grace on August 02, 2014, 04:14:19 AM
Post by: Ms Grace on August 02, 2014, 04:14:19 AM
Quote from: JulieBlair on August 02, 2014, 04:12:31 AM
Is everyone here from OZ? That's it, I'm moving, Jessica, want to come too?
You're always welcome, just don't try to arrive as an asylum seeker or they'll ship you straight back again... :P
Title: Re: Waiting room wink wink or silent treatment? :)
Post by: Jenny07 on August 02, 2014, 04:18:29 AM
Post by: Jenny07 on August 02, 2014, 04:18:29 AM
Just fly business class.
So much better that steerage.
Yes we are taking over so be afraid...
I have a special room waiting just for Jessica at my place.
So much better that steerage.
Yes we are taking over so be afraid...
I have a special room waiting just for Jessica at my place.
Title: Re: Waiting room wink wink or silent treatment? :)
Post by: AnonyMs on August 02, 2014, 04:22:14 AM
Post by: AnonyMs on August 02, 2014, 04:22:14 AM
Quote from: Ms Grace on August 02, 2014, 03:50:43 AMI don't think you strictly need a referral to see a specialist like Dr Hayes, but if you don't you'll end up paying the full price yourself - no Medicare discount. It's really expensive.
I actually made an appointment to see him before I had my referral, his waiting list was six weeks when I started seeing him a year ago - I knew the referral was imminent - they don't need the referral for you to make the appointment but you absolutely need to make sure you have it when you show up. I saved about two weeks that way.
Title: Re: Waiting room wink wink or silent treatment? :)
Post by: Ms Grace on August 02, 2014, 04:30:06 AM
Post by: Ms Grace on August 02, 2014, 04:30:06 AM
This is true. But you'll need to pay in full on the day and claim the Medicare back - even so you don't get all of it back.
Title: Re: Waiting room wink wink or silent treatment? :)
Post by: luna nyan on August 02, 2014, 08:18:12 AM
Post by: luna nyan on August 02, 2014, 08:18:12 AM
Dr H is out at Mona Vale on Thursdays.
As for first appointment, we had a brief chat. Took blood pressure, height, weight, and I walked outwit an E script and a referral for blood test.
He didn't ask me whether or not I wanted to think about it - I presented in a manner that made sure he knew I fully understood what I was doing. (My line of work and my psych report helped there). Started on E pretty much after he got then blood work up back - he just emailed me an ok to start.
He'll check chest development at review appointments along with weight and blood pressure.
With the referral - yes it is necessary to get Medicare rebate, otherwise you will pay full fee out of pocket. Referrals are valid for 1 year only, so if your GP is willing, get a continuing referral that doesn't expire.
Mostly Sydney girls on this thread, where's everyone else?! So far the majority here are hiding in the corner, except for Jessica and Joan. I'll count myself in the skulking in the corner camp as well (don't look at me, don't talk to me, or you'll be scarred for life >:-) )
As for first appointment, we had a brief chat. Took blood pressure, height, weight, and I walked outwit an E script and a referral for blood test.
He didn't ask me whether or not I wanted to think about it - I presented in a manner that made sure he knew I fully understood what I was doing. (My line of work and my psych report helped there). Started on E pretty much after he got then blood work up back - he just emailed me an ok to start.
He'll check chest development at review appointments along with weight and blood pressure.
With the referral - yes it is necessary to get Medicare rebate, otherwise you will pay full fee out of pocket. Referrals are valid for 1 year only, so if your GP is willing, get a continuing referral that doesn't expire.
Mostly Sydney girls on this thread, where's everyone else?! So far the majority here are hiding in the corner, except for Jessica and Joan. I'll count myself in the skulking in the corner camp as well (don't look at me, don't talk to me, or you'll be scarred for life >:-) )
Title: Re: Waiting room wink wink or silent treatment? :)
Post by: immortal gypsy on August 02, 2014, 08:27:19 AM
Post by: immortal gypsy on August 02, 2014, 08:27:19 AM
Hey I'm like this in all waiting rooms, I do know the receptionist better then I do my doctors (they are the ones you need to be nice to if you need an urgent favor). The corners help prop myself up, as I was told as a child
Why stand when you can sit
Why sit when you can lie down
Why be awake when you can be asleep
Just because I look like I'm sleeping doesn't mean I'm not awake and aware of all that goes on around me
Why stand when you can sit
Why sit when you can lie down
Why be awake when you can be asleep
Just because I look like I'm sleeping doesn't mean I'm not awake and aware of all that goes on around me
Title: Re: Waiting room wink wink or silent treatment? :)
Post by: Eva Marie on August 02, 2014, 08:52:31 AM
Post by: Eva Marie on August 02, 2014, 08:52:31 AM
The old me would barricade myself behind a magazine and not want to engage in idle chit chat.
The new me is quite the opposite - I'll talk to anyone, anywhere. Starting a conversation is easy; you just notice something about the person that is unusual or that you like and make a comment about that, and then listen to what they say for ideas of where the conversation might go.
The last time I was in a waiting room was at my endo's a couple of weeks ago. I had just taken a seat when a lady sitting close to me struck up a conversation out of the blue, and we chit chatted back and forth until I had to go into the back room for my appointment. Things like that never happened when I was in boy mode.
Estrogen has put a lot more words in my head :D
The new me is quite the opposite - I'll talk to anyone, anywhere. Starting a conversation is easy; you just notice something about the person that is unusual or that you like and make a comment about that, and then listen to what they say for ideas of where the conversation might go.
The last time I was in a waiting room was at my endo's a couple of weeks ago. I had just taken a seat when a lady sitting close to me struck up a conversation out of the blue, and we chit chatted back and forth until I had to go into the back room for my appointment. Things like that never happened when I was in boy mode.
Estrogen has put a lot more words in my head :D
Title: Re: Waiting room wink wink or silent treatment? :)
Post by: Cindy on August 02, 2014, 09:00:12 AM
Post by: Cindy on August 02, 2014, 09:00:12 AM
Quote from: JulieBlair on August 02, 2014, 04:12:31 AM
Is everyone here from OZ? That's it, I'm moving. Jessica, want to come too?
Only the cute ones!
You do realise Australians are the inheritors of the world, it is in the bible
'Blessed are the meek for they shall inherit the world' :laugh:
Title: Re: Waiting room wink wink or silent treatment? :)
Post by: luna nyan on August 02, 2014, 09:11:48 AM
Post by: luna nyan on August 02, 2014, 09:11:48 AM
Quote from: Cindy on August 02, 2014, 09:00:12 AMNothing meek here. A lot of hot air and overblown egos if you ask me! :P
Only the cute ones!
You do realise Australians are the inheritors of the world, it is in the bible
'Blessed are the meek for they shall inherit the world' :laugh:
The pattern seems to be the more settled someone is in presentation, the more likely they'll be happy to strike up a conversation...
Title: Re: Waiting room wink wink or silent treatment? :)
Post by: JulieBlair on August 02, 2014, 04:05:46 PM
Post by: JulieBlair on August 02, 2014, 04:05:46 PM
Quote from: Cindy on August 02, 2014, 09:00:12 AM
Only the cute ones!
You do realise Australians are the inheritors of the world, it is in the bible
'Blessed are the meek for they shall inherit the world' :laugh:
Last time I went out with folks from down under, there was nothing meek about it. Holy Molly can you people party. Had to escape back to the states to save my liver, ended up in AA. Have things changed? I'm not sure I would believe you if you said they had, I need my memories flawed though they may be. I hope to get back, by way of the Kiwi in a couple of years just to meet everyone. Who knows maybe this time I'll stay ;)
Love you guys, you inspire me.
Julie
Title: Re: Waiting room wink wink or silent treatment? :)
Post by: Jessica Merriman on August 02, 2014, 04:10:28 PM
Post by: Jessica Merriman on August 02, 2014, 04:10:28 PM
Quote from: Jenny07 on August 02, 2014, 04:18:29 AM
I have a special room waiting just for Jessica at my place.
:icon_yikes: Why did I just have visions of hot metal? Is that dinner burning or me? ;D
Title: Re: Waiting room wink wink or silent treatment? :)
Post by: immortal gypsy on August 02, 2014, 05:02:27 PM
Post by: immortal gypsy on August 02, 2014, 05:02:27 PM
Quote from: JulieBlair on August 02, 2014, 04:05:46 PMWell my brother was in Europe last year, he had to tell people he was from New Zealand so he could get into bars. So I don't think our reputation has changed much.
Last time I went out with folks from down under, there was nothing meek about it. Holy Molly can you people party. Had to escape back to the states to save my liver, ended up in AA. Have things changed? I'm not sure I would believe you if you said they had, I need my memories flawed though they may be. I hope to get back, by way of the Kiwi in a couple of years just to meet everyone. Who knows maybe this time I'll stay ;)
Love you guys, you inspire me.
Julie
Title: Re: Waiting room wink wink or silent treatment? :)
Post by: Christine Eryn on August 03, 2014, 09:50:29 AM
Post by: Christine Eryn on August 03, 2014, 09:50:29 AM
In the years I've been seeing my doctor, I never said a single word to anyone in the waiting room. It would be too akward for both parties, I'm sure. But, my doctor is well known for HRT, and I've seen trans people quite a bit there.