Community Conversation => Significant Others talk => Topic started by: karmagypsy on August 16, 2014, 05:03:55 PM Return to Full Version

Title: HELP?????
Post by: karmagypsy on August 16, 2014, 05:03:55 PM
I have a few questions and not even positive im in the right place to be asking them but here I go. So I am ftm I am also gay my boyfreind who i have been on and off agian for almost four years has never been in a relationship with any form of male and sence im working my way of of the gender closet now im affraid its going to hit him that i truly am a man and he is going to hightail it out of here. He says he understands and loves me any way but is there any advice to help him out and me out thro all of this?
Title: Re: HELP?????
Post by: Ms Grace on August 16, 2014, 05:26:13 PM
If it helps, a trans guy I know has fully transitioned and kept his boyfriend from when he presented as butch femme and even as girly, so it is possible. I guess it does depend on your boyfriend's sexual orientation, if he is 100% hetro then it nay be very challenging for him. If he has some room to move sexually in the bi direction it may not be as big an issue as you fear. Keeping in communication is the most important thing. He should see a counsellor if there are things about himself that he needs to discuss for professional support. As is always the case with these things, you don't know until you know...the only way is forward. :)
Title: Re: HELP?????
Post by: specialK103080 on August 16, 2014, 05:29:01 PM
That was one thing I had to think about as soon to the outside world I will be in a same sex relationship. I have never thought of myself as a lesbian and not sure I ever will. But I also know that I love my partner no matter what gender they are. And so don't care what people think of me as, as long as they know that I'm in a happy, loving relationship.
I feel in love with her and not what is between her legs.
I'm sure it's similar to your partner. They love you for you and as you transition you will become an even better, happier person.
It will be hard and each step of the way you will take it in stride but just make sure to talk about it openly and don't push him into anything sooner then he is comfortable with.
Title: Re: HELP?????
Post by: mark s on August 20, 2014, 05:06:09 PM
If he truly loves you for who you are he will try to make it work, even if he's straight. I think I would have fallen for my girl even if she was pre everything and still was living as a boy (I'm straight). I mean her personality perfectly fits my type.

Don't get me wrong, I probably would have gone through alot as I'm 100% straigth. But in the end i would have fallen for her anyway as all her friends/family said the only thing that had changed was that she is much happier now.