Susan's Place Transgender Resources

could you be satisfied if you could " pass" with make up, bangs and large sun glasses and a large floppy hat, but with out any thing you can't ,but living androgynously not a problem. could you be non dysphoric under these conditions, this is basically how I live 9 months in. I hope my face changes a lot more so I don't need the extras to "pass", but not quite sure if that's going to happen . My therapist say's I'm a lot happier person though. Just curious if satisfaction   can be attained with out totally being full time.

Satisfaction can only be determined by the individual that seeks it.

Huggs
Catherine

I doubt if I will ever truly "pass."  I am accepted and treated respectfully and with courtesy most everywhere I go.  But whether or not it is with a "wink" I don't worry about too much.  I usually dress androgynously feminine, if such a thing exists, and it seems to me that is actually the way most women dress and present.  I guess I live, work, and play as much as possible as myself without much regard to how I am read.

I think that confidence displayed => reaction received.  When I am confident and comfortable, to most people I am just another woman/customer/acquaintance/friend.  I've been doing HRT for two years, and I don't expect much more that I've got, although I'm growing my hair longer and still have some electrolysis to finish.  Perhaps when that is complete I'll be more passable, but I suspect that I will always at least raise a brow if anyone actually cares.  In that case my ID, Passport, and birth certificate all read "F".  If that isn't enough, I guess it's none of my business, and assuredly none of theirs.

LOL, I sure wandered away from your question.  I live as I feel I authentically am.  The result is as above.   I have lots of things to think about, but gender dysphoria is no longer one of them that is problematic.

Cheers,
Julie

Quote from: stephaniec on August 20, 2014, 01:53:28 PM
could you be satisfied if you could " pass" with make up, bangs and large sun glasses and a large floppy hat, but with out any thing you can't ,but living androgynously not a problem. could you be non dysphoric under these conditions, this is basically how I live 9 months in. I hope my face changes a lot more so I don't need the extras to "pass", but not quite sure if that's going to happen . My therapist say's I'm a lot happier person though. Just curious if satisfaction   can be attained with out totally being full time.

Stephanie, IMHO, seeking your own personal happiness as long as you are respectful to others, should be among your most important goals.  Then, if they respect who YOU are, then they should at least accept you.  If they reject you, then you probably won't be happy around them.  It might make you happier to seek out people who respect your femininity.

In the end, it is YOU who determines whether you are happy or not.

That said, can I myself be happy at less than full-time?  For now, yes, but I am a girl, so I want to continue this journey gradually, and enjoy the process.

So far, I haven't "come out" at the University or with any clients.  But I want to test a "coming out" with a group of 4 female clients, since I talk with them almost like "one of the girls" anyway when they are at my house.  For now, I haven't come out, and I don't feel dysphoria because of that -- because I know that as soon as I am ready, then I will make the decision to "come out" to them.

My main concern is that they will reject my being a girl, and I will lose money.  If i can conquer this worry, and be sure it doesn't hurt me economically, then I can "come out" to them...

All 3 of my bosses are female at the University, as is the HR Director -- so maybe they will be sympathetic to seeing my growing breasts, when it gets to the point where I cannot hide them any longer...

:)

Johanna.

No. What I want is to be a feminine woman. I don't want to be androgynous nor do I want to butch there is nothing wrong with those things but it just isn't what I want for me. I still plan on getting some facial surgery even though I seem to be passing I don't want there to be any confusion on my appearance I want to look undeniably femme even with my hair back wearing boy clothes.

The answer would be "yes", at least for the time being. I am much more confident when being androgynous than trying to pass as female, and I can rock both ways and let others decide who are they dealing with, though when they gender me as female the feeling is more pleasant...

Quote from: stephaniec on August 20, 2014, 01:53:28 PM
could you be satisfied if you could " pass" with make up, bangs and large sun glasses and a large floppy hat, but with out any thing you can't ,but living androgynously not a problem.

That's definitely something I've considered in order to address the minor "dischord" I have.  I'd rather be an androgynous male who could look very feminine than be a full-time feminine female.

Different folks, different strokes I guess.

yes, when I'm in a dress and make up and get treated as for my proper gender , nothing can compare

Quote from: Kimberley Beauregard on August 20, 2014, 03:26:23 PM
That's definitely something I've considered in order to address the minor "dischord" I have.  I'd rather be an androgynous male who could look very feminine than be a full-time feminine female.

Different folks, different strokes I guess.

Have You thought about "full-time badass female - hot and totally confident in herself and everything she does? Since world is full of feminine women, this niche is kinda vacant ;).

Quote from: ♡ Emily ♡ on August 20, 2014, 03:33:27 PM

Have You thought about "full-time badass female - hot and totally confident in herself and everything she does? Since world is full of feminine women, this niche is kinda vacant ;).

Milla Jovovich

Quote from: stephaniec on August 20, 2014, 03:44:42 PM
Milla Jovovich

I had her image in mind when posted that reply... :) - the one from Resident Evil and Ultraviolet :)

Quote from: ♡ Emily ♡ on August 20, 2014, 03:33:27 PM

Have You thought about "full-time badass female - hot and totally confident in herself and everything she does? Since world is full of feminine women, this niche is kinda vacant ;).

...actually, I have.  That's something awesome to be.

Milla Jovovich is a good call.

No. I need to be a woman.

I need a wig or a hat in order to pass. That's enough for me - that I look like a woman with some effort.

I think androgyny is the majority of transwomens reality. If the universe is telling u you're not passing, presenting androgynously might make the universe a WHOLE LOT kinder to you.

Am I wrong?

Quote from: Evelyn K on August 20, 2014, 04:29:33 PM
I think androgyny is the majority of transwomens reality. If the universe is telling u you're not passing, presenting androgynously might make the universe a WHOLE LOT kinder to you.

Am I wrong?

Nope, you're spot on. :)  But I'm still going to be as feminine as I can manage.  I like it like that and the universe is still pretty kind.

j

The thing is Julie, androgyny can be attractive in its own way. You can be androgynous and still be more attractive than a 100% passing woman.

Have to play up your best features.

That's what I'm currently doing. Being a former PUA (pickup artist + studied body language extensively) I can scan and read people like a book - I never get the stink eye or receive a negative vibe presenting androgynously.

No.  And that's the reason I went full time.  I initially thought of myself as nonbinary, but it turned out that I was quite binary when I was completely honest with myself and needed to go all-in to be truly happy.

Quote from: Hikari on August 20, 2014, 02:55:13 PM
No. What I want is to be a feminine woman. I don't want to be androgynous nor do I want to butch there is nothing wrong with those things but it just isn't what I want for me. I still plan on getting some facial surgery even though I seem to be passing I don't want there to be any confusion on my appearance I want to look undeniably femme even with my hair back wearing boy clothes.

To answer the question: Absolutely not! I'm here^^___^^ where Hikari is with this. I'm a girl, I always have been a girl, a somewhat girly girl, and I have a need to be seen as a girl by all who I encounter. I too plan on having some FFS after my SRS and other surgeries even though I pass easily with or with out makeup, my hair up or down no matter what I wear and don't seem to need it.

This is just how I feel regarding myself for there's nothing wrong with being happy presenting as Andro. It's just not me that's all.

Ali :icon_flower:

For myself?  No, gotta be fulltime, even if I'm easily read as being trans. I still get by and I work with the public and most everyone knows me, but at least they like and respect me, so they gender me correctly even when they do know.

Quote from: Evelyn K on August 20, 2014, 04:48:19 PM
The thing is Julie, androgyny can be attractive in its own way. You can be androgynous and still be more attractive than a 100% passing woman.

Have to play up your best features.

That's what I'm currently doing. Being a former PUA (pickup artist + studied body language extensively) I can scan and read people like a book - I never get the stink eye or receive a negative vibe presenting androgynously.

I think androgyny is very awesome and sexy, but it just wasn't "me".  I admire those who like to blur the lines.

I just really don't know anymore. ??? I used to be but that is kind of fading. Besides I have bigger boobs than Milla does so that is a plus. I really wouldn't say she is androgynous though. She was a supermodel after all. Who knows how big they would get on HRT? I hope not too much. Rough roads make me sore enough now if I don't wear a bra for support.

I tried going andro and what I discovered was I got called "sir" about 99 times out of 100, because my body type tended to edge me closer to the perception of being male.

It was only when I edged over the line into fem territory, by wearing 100% female clothing and accessories and adjusting my hair just so, that I found I was more comfortable and got gendered correctly 99 times out of 100.

I think going andro is fine for someone who's just dipping their toes in the water or still feels a little bit male, but I discovered quickly that this was not me.

 Simply put NEVER. I don't really pass and never will and don't care ,people treat me with respect and courtesy that is all I ask.I have been full time since July of 2013 and did not start hrt till Dec 2013 that took a lot of courage but I had no choice it amounted to come out or perish.

Quote from: Kimberley Beauregard on August 20, 2014, 03:26:23 PM
That's definitely something I've considered in order to address the minor "dischord" I have.  I'd rather be an androgynous male who could look very feminine than be a full-time feminine female.

Different folks, different strokes I guess.

KB

Ditto. This is where I am.  But life is a journey and plenty of NB folk have transitioned MTF and then chosen to present as  A.  So anything is possible in the long run.  Time will tell.

Safe travels

Aisla

For me, no, that's not enough. I have to wear wigs due to hair loss and without a wig, I'm rather obviously male. But with a wig and just a big of light foundation, I'm good to go 98% of the time.

I am continuing onward, will get my legal paperwork done soon, then begin counting the days until I can do GCS. For me, that's where I need to go. For others, the answer may certainly be different. Only you can determine when you've reached a point where you are happy.

I briefly (for about three seconds) considered the option of going androgynous, but knew it wasn't for me.  I always wanted to be a girl all the way.  I'm a bit of a girly girl, and that's what makes me happy.

I am currently living in a state of limbo or androgyny mostly out of circumstance rather than choice. I have to say I don't particularly like it, even though I see this as a transitory state for me. I want to be seen as a woman, the woman I always felt I am within. I don't want to be thought of as being androgynous forever to have funny looks or quizzical stares just because the general public isn't sure of the gender I am presenting. To never know if shop assistants should let me go to the mens or ladies changing areas in shops when I want to try on a garment for size. To not be sure if I should chose the men's or ladies' toilet. For the general public to look at me strangely when they see my chest but work out my assigned gender from other traits.

HRT is helping to change my body and looks. Put some make up on, do up my hair and stick a dress on me I look like the woman I feel I am, but dress me up in gender neutral clothes and it is hard to determine whether I am boy or girl.

It'd make everything a lot easier for me (if I could happiness being androgynous). I am hoping I can find happiness without transitioning.

the big dilemma for me is that there is still a lot I haven't figured out, the thought of marriage, relationships, jobs just don't come to my mind, I don't know how to say this, but I feel like IM too young for all that but i'm already 23 now.

oh well. Ill give it time.

Quote from: Cin on August 21, 2014, 02:33:11 PM
It'd make everything a lot easier for me (if I could happiness being androgynous). I am hoping I can find happiness without transitioning.

the big dilemma for me is that there is still a lot I haven't figured out, the thought of marriage, relationships, jobs just don't come to my mind, I don't know how to say this, but I feel like IM too young for all that but i'm already 23 now.

oh well. Ill give it time.

Cin, let me put it this way. At 23 I had to supress myself. At 25 I had the freedom to let myself go and really express myself. I was more than happy being sort of androgynous but girly more than boyly. ;) Now I am in my mid 40s and the dysphoria is coming faster, harder and at closer intervals than ever before. Just be prepared for it to be a dynamic thing and what felt right yesterday and good, may not feel right and good tomorrow. Just be prepared. Me it's hitting me like a ton of bricks right now. Jill at 43 decided to go for it. Me at 46, am just now wading a little deeper and thinking of saying to heck with it and going for it.

I just gotta' say, all seriousness aside. Already 23? You want me to send you a rocker and a shawl hon? :laugh: Now seriously though, you might find a happy medium for a while and maybe forever. That would be nice, but if you are anywhere near dysphoric now, just expect it to get worst with age. It may not for you, but it is for me. But we are all different and unique and truly special.

Quote from: justpat on August 20, 2014, 08:23:59 PM
Simply put NEVER. I don't really pass and never will and don't care ,people treat me with respect and courtesy that is all I ask.I have been full time since July of 2013 and did not start hrt till Dec 2013 that took a lot of courage but I had no choice it amounted to come out or perish.

Well hello there, it's nice to see your back. Hope you stay and your doing well.

Ali :)

Quote from: Leila on August 21, 2014, 02:03:53 PM
I am currently living in a state of limbo or androgyny mostly out of circumstance rather than choice. I have to say I don't particularly like it, even though I see this as a transitory state for me. I want to be seen as a woman, the woman I always felt I am within. I don't want to be thought of as being androgynous forever to have funny looks or quizzical stares just because the general public isn't sure of the gender I am presenting. To never know if shop assistants should let me go to the mens or ladies changing areas in shops when I want to try on a garment for size. To not be sure if I should chose the men's or ladies' toilet. For the general public to look at me strangely when they see my chest but work out my assigned gender from other traits.

HRT is helping to change my body and looks. Put some make up on, do up my hair and stick a dress on me I look like the woman I feel I am, but dress me up in gender neutral clothes and it is hard to determine whether I am boy or girl.

I'm at this place , but a hair close to tumbling off the cliff into total flight

Quote from: stephaniec on August 21, 2014, 05:02:39 PM
I'm at this place , but a hair close to tumbling off the cliff into total flight

A hair isn't that far Hon. I am more or less at a split end of a hair. I just have to work harder with my leathery wings to fly. ;) But hell, if we do all fly, then I know all my prayers have been answered. Unfortunately the leathery wings ought to give it way that my prayers don't get answered. >:-) Sorry everyone. :'(

Nope.  I am andro now.  Pass me a skirt!

Quote from: Jess42 on August 21, 2014, 02:48:08 PM
Cin, let me put it this way. At 23 I had to supress myself. At 25 I had the freedom to let myself go and really express myself. I was more than happy being sort of androgynous but girly more than boyly. ;) Now I am in my mid 40s and the dysphoria is coming faster, harder and at closer intervals than ever before. Just be prepared for it to be a dynamic thing and what felt right yesterday and good, may not feel right and good tomorrow. Just be prepared. Me it's hitting me like a ton of bricks right now. Jill at 43 decided to go for it. Me at 46, am just now wading a little deeper and thinking of saying to heck with it and going for it.

I just gotta' say, all seriousness aside. Already 23? You want me to send you a rocker and a shawl hon? :laugh: Now seriously though, you might find a happy medium for a while and maybe forever. That would be nice, but if you are anywhere near dysphoric now, just expect it to get worst with age. It may not for you, but it is for me. But we are all different and unique and truly special.

Well my dysphoria has gotten worse, I went from thinking I'm just a boy who likes girly stuff, to a boy with preference for feminine gender roles to a guy with interest in crossdressing to.... this.... whatever I am today. It took me 18 years, when I finally started looking for a name for my problem, and people like myself.

well, Susan's is a good place to look around

Quote from: Cin on August 22, 2014, 08:31:02 AM
Well my dysphoria has gotten worse, I went from thinking I'm just a boy who likes girly stuff, to a boy with preference for feminine gender roles to a guy with interest in crossdressing to.... this.... whatever I am today. It took me 18 years, when I finally started looking for a name for my problem, and people like myself.

Cin. I would definitely suggest seeing a gender therapist if it is getting that bad now. What you are today is transgender somewhere in the spectrum. Just where is what you are going to have to decide.

Well you found a place here so welcome Hon. I might suggest to look in the reference library. Susan has made sure there is a lot of informative stuff in the psychology section.

this is a difficult one...

In my case I present mostly androgynous cause I cant really do otherwise
I dont look nice in a dress, I still have muscles in my arms etc etc
My face isnt that feminine either

What I want to say is that I am personally stuck in that andro phase...
truth is Im steadily moving towards female, thats the path im taking
slow and steady from male to female
but I couldnt stay andro forever,I want to look and feel female, it might take a while to reach this goal but I ll try
everytime someone genders me female I just know that this is what I want

What I want and what I need are two different things.

I want to look and sound like a woman.

If I got stuck being androgynous, I suppose I'd be happy just to be "out" and not hiding.

I think what I need is to stop hiding, but it is darn hard to break that wall and to this extent I can't get what I want till I get what I need...

Quote from: Jess42 on August 22, 2014, 08:44:31 AM
Cin. I would definitely suggest seeing a gender therapist if it is getting that bad now. What you are today is transgender somewhere in the spectrum. Just where is what you are going to have to decide.

Well you found a place here so welcome Hon. I might suggest to look in the reference library. Susan has made sure there is a lot of informative stuff in the psychology section.

I'm seriously considering telling my mom the whole story, rather than being cryptic about it. I never thought I'd get so far...... but letting my mom in on everything wouldn't be the smart thing to do at the moment, I can't let my emotions take over.

I'm learning new stuff everyday, but I don't really know where I'm going..

I like the androgynous look to be honest, A few years ago I pulled off the look, but my thinning hair just doesn't do it anymore. I'd be happy looking androgynous if I look fem androgynous, and that was how I looked a few years ago, these days I also have facial hair to worry about. Maybe some people can look androgynous and feel female (with or without HRT).

Quote from: Aina on August 22, 2014, 08:56:31 AM
What I want and what I need are two different things.

I want to look and sound like a woman.

If I got stuck being androgynous, I suppose I'd be happy just to be "out" and not hiding.

I think what I need is to stop hiding, but it is darn hard to break that wall and to this extent I can't get what I want till I get what I need...

This.

What I want and I what I need are different. I'm trying to be realistic, but if I could get what I wanted, I think I'd want it all.

Quote from: Cin on August 22, 2014, 09:30:15 AM
This.

What I want and I what I need are different. I'm trying to be realistic, but if I could get what I wanted, I think I'd want it all.

the all would be great

I suppose that "full-time" is referring to a binary female trans woman, I am full-time androgynous and no less than any other type of full-time person in spite of how I read the title of this thread. The OP could have preceded the word 'being' with (just) and the intent and meaning of the question wouldn't have been any clearer. Speaking for other non-binary members here at Susan's the insinuated marginalization of androgynous types here at Susan's as somewhat lesser is pretty disconcerting!

I would never be satisfied being androgynous. It would be more of a stepping stone but I would hate it. Probably moreso than presenting as male.

I want to be a feminine woman. I want to wear skirts and dresses, daisy dukes and two piece bikinis. I want my look and even my voice to be feminine. I would wear a lot of "ordinary" clothes but I want to at least try to be chic. In particular I admire how French women dress. They have an impeccable sense of style (duh) and they don't seem to overdo it. In fact I dated a French woman at one time and I spent more time admiring how she looked dressed and accessorized than I did trying to get her clothes off, LOL!

I tried andro and thought it was perfect for me but nope in the long run, it just made my dysphoria worst. But as soon as people started gendering me female in male clothing is when I stopped andro mode and went full time.

Full time female for me. For me it is about being seen as, and treated as, and being a woman. I was going mental being seen and treated as a male. :-\

Androgynous for me (height, hair, voice) would probably still get me labelled as male, so no.

Quote from: Ms Grace on August 22, 2014, 08:40:11 PM
Full time female for me. For me it is about being seen as, and treated as, and being a woman. I was going mental being seen and treated as a male. :-\

Androgynous for me (height, hair, voice) would probably still get me labelled as male, so no.

yes,, it's quite a feeling to be totally free.

Shan makes a good point.  We all go through the andro phase, but for some of us androgynous is the goal.

That's not for me though.  I can't wait to be one of the girls.

OK.  I am going to speak my mind as someone who has "had it all" for more than 40+ years, having undergone a full and complete medically assisted change in sexual characteristics, (genitals, hormonal rebalancing etc.), when I was 23.  So, please keep that in mind. :)

There was a period of time, (about a year), during that physical transformation when I did my absolute utmost to be invisable.  Although I had been on extremely high doses of female hormones I still had years of testosterone poisoning that needed to be negated and overcome.  Facial/body hair, stature, voice and musculature being just the worst of it all.  That was my "androgynous" stage.  That was my time in limbo between heaven and hell.  Those were my "dark days", when the loneliness, the pain, (from the SRS, the electrolysis, the dilation), was so bad that I wanted to die.

I understand that things are different now.  There are places where androgyny is 'cool' or accepted, but...for those of you that have the option/opportunity to make it all the way across the gender divide, why....why would you want to stay somewhere in the middle?

Quote from: Shantel on August 22, 2014, 06:56:09 PM
I suppose that "full-time" is referring to a binary female trans woman, I am full-time androgynous and no less than any other type of full-time person in spite of how I read the title of this thread. The OP could have preceded the word 'being' with (just) and the intent and meaning of the question wouldn't have been any clearer. Speaking for other non-binary members here at Susan's the insinuated marginalization of androgynous types here at Susan's as somewhat lesser is pretty disconcerting!

It seems that it's acceptable to marginalise the non-binaries, I don't know why.

Quote from: Susan522 on August 22, 2014, 09:37:21 PM
I understand that things are different now.  There are places where androgyny is 'cool' or accepted, but...for those of you that have the option/opportunity to make it all the way across the gender divide, why....why would you want to stay somewhere in the middle?

Could it be that not everyone is actually male or female in the binary sense?

 :police:
No disrespect towards androgyny's will be tolerated, period. Respect everyone's decisions because it is their lives.
:police:

With very much respect to everyone here and those who have posted on this thread, I have lived in that "in between" stage for most of my entire life. And I very much admire those who are secure and happy as Androgynous, for you are stronger than I am, very much stronger.

Because my situation is what it is though, I must follow through all the way. Given my past and what I've been through and my lifelong manurisms and core Identity I just can't live as nothing less than fully feminine. I'm just too girly to be anything less. It's why I made such an awful excuse for a guy. Add to that my strong core identity as female, my very feminine body and my severe crippling at times genital dysphoria and my need becomes clear. I can't live and be happy as anything less than the woman I truly am, and have always been.

As always I highly respect and wish everyone here my absolute best in all your future decisions and endeavors as your true selves. Be true to yourselves and who you truly are inside and you will find true happiness. If I can find happiness coming from where I've been, I believe anyone can. That's the best advice I can give.

Ali :icon_flower:

As a full-time androgynous person I relate well to everyone and don't catch any BS from anyone ever. At the same time I am vicariously involved in the female realm in many ways and am able to step in and out of it at will rather than being stuck in any one mode full time. The reason this works so well is that there came a time when I realized that I didn't wish to go through all the hoops of buying an extensive wardrobe and continually having to cull things out and update it along with all the purses, shoes and matching accessories, have my hair professionally done and colored on schedule and have to put on and take off makeup day in and day out just to try and be successful and fit into the cis women's world. Then I knew that though most males sometimes will never clock me because all they look at is boobs and asses, that women who are ten times more discerning will and their level of acceptance will only be outward but inwardly they will think otherwise and whisper those thoughts to other women, don't kid yourselves about this!

Having carefully weighed all of this plus the probability of losing my wife and family in the process it occurred to me that it would be a losing proposition, for that reason I put on the brakes after my orchiectomy and said enough! I am so happy I did, because I have learned how to just be myself and enjoy every aspect of my life having lost nothing in the process. I have a few male friends who stuck with me and many female friends that I associate with. Why would I trade that just to have a vagina? For me the trade off would be positively asinine so really I shouldn't have to explain and defend my decision to anyone! There are many more who are beginning to think the way I do, so more power to the full-time trans women but you'll have to get over the fact that there are those of us who think differently and it's OK.

I think I'd like to say that as the poster of this question I wasn't questioning the validity of any ones life choices I was just inquiring about their thoughts about whether it really matters if your choice is maxing out dresses or just doing more of the jean thing. super models wear t shirts and jeans. Is it critical  to  wearing dresses to be passable .or to be accepting of your gender expression. I truly love dresses, but more often then not I'm in skinny jeans . what I intended to mean was  am I just as validly considered full time no matter where on the spectrum I fall can' t I be considered full time just by the fact that my body has E instead T for an MTF. There was no intent to marginalize . I was just trying to understand my own  conflict with the way I present in public. I love to be in a dress consistently ,but I don't think my face has changed enough yet to be viewed female without the dress and make up

Quote from: stephaniec on August 23, 2014, 06:16:31 PM
I think I'd like to say that as the poster of this question I wasn't questioning the validity of any ones life choices I was just inquiring about their thoughts about whether it really matters if your choice is maxing out dresses or just doing more of the jean thing. super models wear t shirts and jeans. Is it critical  to  wearing dresses to be passable .or to be accepting of your gender expression. I truly love dresses, but more often then not I'm in skinny jeans . what I intended to mean was  am I just as validly considered full time no matter where on the spectrum I fall can' t I be considered full time just by the fact that my body has E instead T for an MTF. There was no intent to marginalize . I was just trying to understand my own  conflict with the way I present in public. I love to be in a dress consistently ,but I don't think my face has changed enough yet to be viewed female without the dress and make up

Perhaps maybe wording of the title affected my and others replies Stephanie. However my replies to this were authentic to how I feel regarding my femininity and how far i must go to fully accept myself. As for the question you pose here^^___^^, of course, I would think so. I absolutely love dresses, but I don't wear them all the time. More often than not I'm dressed in a tank, halter top and shorts. In the wintertime for me it's usually skinny jeans and the same, tanks or halters with a cute light jacket over it. I've been full time for 5 years and I'm always gendered female whether in skinny jeans, tank/halter and jacket, or in a cute mini sun dress in the middle of summertime. I don't wear makeup everyday either. Many women today dress androgynously but they're still women, and so are you I suspect no matter if your in skinny jeans and a pretty top, or a dress with makeup or without. I just have one word -Booby's. When people see booby's they automatically think WOMAN.

I hope it helps.

Ali :icon_flower:

Quote from: Allyda on August 23, 2014, 06:34:04 PM
Perhaps maybe wording of the title affected my and others replies Stephanie. However my replies to this were authentic to how I feel regarding my femininity and how far i must go to fully accept myself. As for the question you pose here^^___^^, of course, I would think so. I absolutely love dresses, but I don't wear them all the time. More often than not I'm dressed in a tank, halter top and shorts. In the wintertime for me it's usually skinny jeans and the same, tanks or halters with a cute light jacket over it. I've been full time for 5 years and I'm always gendered female whether in skinny jeans, tank/halter and jacket, or in a cute mini sun dress in the middle of summertime. I don't wear makeup everyday either. Many women today dress androgynously but they're still women, and so are you I suspect no matter if your in skinny jeans and a pretty top, or a dress with makeup or without. I just have one word -Booby's. When people see booby's they automatically think WOMAN.

I hope it helps.

Ali :icon_flower:

well, luckily I've got the boobies

Quote from: stephaniec on August 23, 2014, 06:16:31 PM
I think I'd like to say that as the poster of this question I wasn't questioning the validity of any ones life choices I was just inquiring about their thoughts about whether it really matters if your choice is maxing out dresses or just doing more of the jean thing. super models wear t shirts and jeans. Is it critical  to  wearing dresses to be passable .or to be accepting of your gender expression. I truly love dresses, but more often then not I'm in skinny jeans . what I intended to mean was  am I just as validly considered full time no matter where on the spectrum I fall can' t I be considered full time just by the fact that my body has E instead T for an MTF. There was no intent to marginalize . I was just trying to understand my own  conflict with the way I present in public. I love to be in a dress consistently ,but I don't think my face has changed enough yet to be viewed female without the dress and make up

It's OK Stephanie, i understood where you were coming from, I just felt I'd make a statement for the androgynous people who sometimes get a little criticism from the militant MtF trans women which is uncalled for because there are those like myself who decided against full transition for various reasons and are happy right where they are,  then there's another whole class of MtF people who will never be able to afford what it would take to make them feel completely whole and sadly they will be stuck for life in an androgynous lifestyle whether they like it or not. You're always good with me Stephanie, I know your heart and you're a good woman.

Quote from: Shantel on August 23, 2014, 07:08:12 PM
It's OK Stephanie, i understood where you were coming from, I just felt I'd make a statement for the androgynous people who sometimes get a little criticism from the militant MtF trans women which is uncalled for because there are those like myself who decided against full transition for various reasons and are happy right where they are,  then there's another whole class of MtF people who will never be able to afford what it would take to make them feel completely whole and sadly they will be stuck for life in an androgynous lifestyle whether they like it or not. You're always good with me Stephanie, I know your heart and you're a good woman.

wow, thanks