Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Johanna here again gals, hi,

Today, I changed my genetic marker here at Susan's to FEMALE.

For the first time ever.

:)

Why did I do this?  Well, the answer is really quite simple...

I AM FEMALE, and I want to shout it to the world.

Love,
Johanna.

:)

It is a silly little thing, but boy it feels good doesn't it?

SHOUT IT!!! Be proud of it. It may just be an F with pink around it in a square but it is really something to be proud of, ain't it?

Putting it as female made me smile, it was a wonderful feeling. You go girl~

Big Welcome to womanhood. No matter what. Welcome.

Jess...Firefly...Emmaline...Evelyn...

I am crying right now...as I write this...

It is is the second time in 3 minutes I started crying, the first time was when I read your replies...

Your words are poetry to me...

The sky opening up, to my female freedom...

Now I am crying more profusely...

You gals are great...BFF's for forever...

I can cry now...I am never embarrassed to cry now...these are tears of happiness, sincere happiness...

I have found my way...

I am free...

My new breasts will make it more and more necessary to appear in public as I truly feel...

As you girls...

I am no longer poisoned by testosterone...

E and P are my true hormonal balance, and I am mentally whole now...

The physical part, especially my fast-growing breasts and great growing new beautiful hair, is a natural outgrowth of internal happiness...

Internal and external match, and converge...

My mental sky and my physical sky combine, in a giant tapestry, integrated, as one...

I now close my eyes as I type, and I picture my tapestry of freedom in the sky....

In search of inner and external peace...and I have found it...

Life is not forever on this earth, maybe our souls are forever, I don't know for sure, but my peace has arrived, my heart is tranquil...

You girls UNDERSTAND me...you UNDERSTAND how I FEEL...

You are there, in my mental sky tapestry, combining my mental and physical reality...

Now more tears again, my right eye now has a lot liquid dripping down...I don't want to wipe away this giant tear of happiness now falling from my right eys...it tickels me a little...

My sky is blue, my future is bright, upward in our great journey of discovery we fly...

Johanna has lost her Fear of Flying, to borrow from 1970s female genuis author Erica Jong (you can look her up on Google, I highly recommend it).

Clarity.

Peace.

A calm heart.

A heart with feelings.

Mere words, but these words echo my deepest soul...

I AM FEMALE.

Johanna.

Johanna..  I am so happy for you, hon!  Welcome, Sister!  I teared up from your euphoria, and giddiness, and remembered when I registered here, it was.. so .. terrifying choosing Female, yet, so finally, liberating..  scared beyond all reason, but joyous in doing so because I finally admitted to myself who I was.  And thus began this journey of mine, of ours, meeting some of the most amazing women I have ever seen.  You are among them hon.  I truly mean that!

Paula

Quote from: Paula Christine on August 22, 2014, 12:23:17 AM
Johanna..  I am so happy for you, hon!  Welcome, Sister!  I teared up from your euphoria, and giddiness, and remembered when I registered here, it was.. so .. terrifying choosing Female, yet, so finally, liberating..  scared beyond all reason, but joyous in doing so because I finally admitted to myself who I was.  And thus began this journey of mine, of ours, meeting some of the most amazing women I have ever seen.  You are among them hon.  I truly mean that!

Paula

Paula, I cried hard when I absorded your feelings into my soul...I feel your sincerity...we are sisters...our voyage to freedom...why am I crying so much...

"Mere" words, yet, a mirror to our souls...

J

OMG, don't get me started with the tears.

No poetry. It is who you are Johanna. Safe we can drop the John after this. Welcome to womanhood. Yeah we understand. Now you got me in tears. Oh god now I'm mad at you. You 're messing up my ACDC. ;) Seriously though, you are messing up my ACDC with tears and that is good time Rock and Roll. >:( ;D

Seriously though without the ACDC and all the feigned PO , you can be you here. If you wanna' keep the John part that is fine too. Just be you, we accept everyone.

PS. Please stop the crying before I get started. :'(

Paula, it is the liberation of the female mind...

There, from birth, hidden until now, denied, repressed, yearning to be set free...

To FLY, a new bird, a Phoenix, a rebirth, a "new person" emerges...

BUT...

Is this REALLY a "new" person?

Or did our mommy's uterus just make a mistake with us girls?

We have re-entered our mommies, and our mommies got it right this time...

Johanna.

Johanna I'm very very so so happy for you. My eyes are welling up over your joyfulness of femininity. Congratulations! :icon_bunch:

Ali :icon_flower:

OMG I am CRYING my brains out right now!!!!

Quote from: Evelyn K on August 22, 2014, 12:37:48 AM
OMG I am CRYING my brains out right now!!!!

So am I Evelyn, as I close my eyes to sleep.

Johanna.

I will drop the "John" tomorrow in the morning.

gawd we're all going now!!  I just wanna know, how can someone cry so much and not become dehydrated??

and my opthamoligist is concerned about my dry eye??  HA!  little does he know!!

Johanna.. you don't need the second name, hon..  you are finally becoming real.  No more playing a sad part in a bad movie.  Crying is just part and parcel of this.  I have cried an ocean of tears for months, each time I let another friend into my circle (I pick one close friend each week).  It feels a little better, each time I break down a wall, and let more light into my life.  You will know that feeling.  And it will free your heart.  Love you hon, I really mean that.

Paula

No you aren't Evelyn, but Johanna, the unique. Sweety, you are your own so if you want, drop the John now and be the true you. But if you want to keep the John part, that is fine too.

Quote from: JohannaJohn on August 22, 2014, 12:55:24 AM
So am I Evelyn, as I close my eyes to sleep.

Johanna.

I will drop the "John" tomorrow in the morning.

Johanna, you and I and our tingling nipples and growing breast are going to be OK. I promise.

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Foi58.tinypic.com%2Fm2fd0.jpg&hash=415f1ec2ac613148c1ae63ac61d9f5952124bc8d)

^^ this !

Quote from: Evelyn K on August 22, 2014, 01:12:18 AM
Johanna, you and I and our tingling nipples and growing breast are going to be OK. I promise.

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Foi58.tinypic.com%2Fm2fd0.jpg&hash=415f1ec2ac613148c1ae63ac61d9f5952124bc8d)

Yes Evelyn, We will be OK.  I know you are right.

The dual headlights announcing a physical reality of female-ness on the outside, are shining brighter and brighter.

Johanna.

Johanna, my nipples and breasts are bouncing in concurrence. We really are sisters of the highest order. I'm twirling my tassels in happyness for you Johanna. The tears from my happiness are splashing off my tassels and sprinkling the flowers nearby. The flowers are blossoming and smiling for you Johanna.

(Hugs)

Quote from: Evelyn K on August 22, 2014, 10:17:52 PM
Johanna, my nipples and breasts are bouncing in concurrence. We really are sisters of the highest order. I'm twirling my tassels in happyness for you Johanna. The tears from my happiness are splashing off my tassels and sprinkling the flowers nearby. The flowers are blossoming and smiling for you Johanna.

(Hugs)

Ohhhhhhh, bouncing booby's. Evelyn you always know how to push my buttons, lol!

Johanna I'm very happy for you too, and more so you are becoming secure in your femininity.

Ali :icon_flower:

It is a silly little thing, but boy it feels good doesn't it?
Report to moderator     Logged
Body... meet brain.  Now follow her lead and there will be no more trouble, you dig?

Emmaline, yes, it is "mere" words...but what are words?

Words are, in the end, about COMMUNICATION.  I am one of the best language teachers in the world.  I earn my living teaching languages, with a revolutionary way to learn English for Spanish speakers.  Today the University here has even asked a student teacher to sit in on my classes for the rest of the semester as part of her internship (she is 18 years old), to learn from me, a master language professor.  Very few professors here are selected for this honor.  I am one of the few and chosen.

I live and breathe language and communication.

It is "mere" words -- but a window into our souls.  Our true feminine souls.

We know we are female, all of us.  We had a mistake at birth -- it wasn't our fault -- it wasn't even our mommy's or daddy's fault, either, because our mommy's and daddy's simply loved each other, and did what comes naturally... :)

Nature, or God depending on your religious beliefs, made a mistake.

We are sad about this mistake, but are we bitter?

Emmaline and my other BFF's, let us not be bitter.  Let us try to forget our sorrow of hiding our girl side, for so many years, such as so many of us have here.
\
Emmaline, I agree that the physical task is a "silly little thing."

Okay, I had to ask a moderator Isabel for some help with it, but I got it done.  It was simple, actually.  Just a few mouse clicks and keystrokes.

The form asked for my gender.  A simple keystroke, to mark FEMALE.

But what is the communication significance of this action?  What does it MEAN, in communications emanating from your souls, for each and every one of you girls, to make these "silly little keystrokes," to paraphrase our BFF Emmaline...you ALL did it, and those of you who have been totally honest with your souls, which is everyone, or nearly everyone here at Susan's I think...

Is it "merely" the physical ability to type reasonably competently?  Is it "merely" the ability understand the basics of how to use a computer or tablet or smartphone?

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO it is MUCH more significant than this.

Because if it were THIS easy...why ddin't I myself, type FEMALE when I first registered at Susan's?

Why do some of us girls here wait awhile to take this "silly little action" of marking FEMALE, for all the world to see...all the world, including visitors we don't know.  This is a very PUBLIC proclamation of our souls.

An edict.  A "product release" of our femininity.  We are HONEST about our feelings and gender.

Day before yesterday, was a day of female poetry for me.  I am not nearly as skilled a writer of poetic language as genius female writer Erica Jong of the 1970's and 1980's.  But I am highly skilled at this, in any case.  And the poetry inside me sings.

I am a female singer of poetic language, because this female poetry resonates in my deepest soul, and it is me.

I bottled it up for 39 years, from age 16 to age 55.  I was afraid to let JOHANNA free.

Day before yesterday, Johanna became FREE.

Why? Because this vision and tapestry of clarity made it a "compulsion" and "necessity" to share with the world.  In public.

My female boss at the University today was looking at my breasts and nipples, rather obviously.  I am new to this.  The 12-year-old girl is on my outside, a little awkward now, I am in the "awkward" stage of my female physical REALITY.  No matter, I am euphorically happy.

Physically, I am a 12-year-old girl, who has just enterted puberty.

Mentally and emotionally, I am the eternal female in my soul, and linked with my eternal female sisters.

To again paraphrase our BFF Emmaline...

QUOTE: "Body... meet brain.  Now follow her lead and there will be no more trouble, you dig? UNQUOTE

Emmaline speaks words of feminine GENIUS.  "Silly" little words -- but what are words -- are they really "silly"? -- or something more --

Words are COMMUNICATION, in the end.

Jumping outward from our souls.

My breasts were jumping outward to my female boss today at the University.

MY FEMALE BOSS ALMOST SEEMED TO BE TALKING TO MY BREASTS TODAY, RATHER THAN MY FACE.

Like any girl, I was of course flattered.  It is great and new for me, I have no need yet to feel resentful of this ("I have a brain, I am not a bimbo with breasts").

This was when my female boss was delivering the great news that I am one of the few Professors to have the honor of having an 18-year-old female intern teacher, a major in foreign language teaching, sit in on my class for the entire rest of the semester until December...

Yet, my female boss, in delivering this joyous news to me, COULDN'T KEEP HER EYES OFF MY BREASTS.

She was talking to my mind, but she was for sure TALKING TO MY BREASTS.

My female boss, who is about 35 years old, a black female, stared at my breasts about 75% of the time, and at my face only 25% of the time.

Is Johanna a "bimbo with breasts"? ROFL, just too funny.  LOL.

Or, more likely is...

Johanna's breasts are a physical affirmation, protruding outward, growing...

To mirror the growth and FLYING FREE emerging, of the true female soul of Johanna, that has been there since the birth of Johanna, and repressed for so long...

Johanna is free.

And "body is getitng closer to matching brain."

Once we are SURE on the inside, female hormones then put of physical reality into balance...

NOW Johanna needs to have PLANS on Johanna's emerging breasts and hair, on plans to have the rest of the world, understand an interact peacefully, with the now PHYSICALLY MORE AND MORE FREE, Johanna.

The "mere keystrokes" of Johann's gender change to FEMALE here at Susans, simply reflected the "moment of clarity" from Johanna's soul...

JOHANNA IS FEMALE.

JOHANNA IS HAPPY.

JOHANNA IS EUPHORIC.

JOHANNA IS FLYING.

JOHANNA IS FREE.

Most important of all,

Johanna is Johanna.

:)

^^ A bit too long for me to read, but I'm sure it's a cool story! (https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Foi62.tinypic.com%2Fjfyqf7.jpg&hash=19af27963cc6073e6e01c9e10cb0f6b54f324e68)

Quote from: Evelyn K on August 23, 2014, 09:58:11 PM
^^ A bit too long for me to read, but I'm sure it's a cool story! (https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Foi62.tinypic.com%2Fjfyqf7.jpg&hash=19af27963cc6073e6e01c9e10cb0f6b54f324e68)

Well, my female boss was staring at my breasts 75% of the time while we spoke for a few minutes this morning.

And looking at my face only 25% of the time.

Am I now a "bimbo with boobies and no brains"? Lol, rofl.

Wow it felt great!

BOOBIES ARE AWESOME!

Johanna.