Community Conversation => Transitioning => Coming out of the closet => Topic started by: Paeonia on October 08, 2014, 03:30:53 AM Return to Full Version
Title: Finally came out to my dad last night.
Post by: Paeonia on October 08, 2014, 03:30:53 AM
Post by: Paeonia on October 08, 2014, 03:30:53 AM
I came out to my dad last night.
It was possibly the hardest conversation I've ever had.
I've been on HRT for 6 months, and figured perhaps now is the time to say something before it gets any more noticable. I thought he would have an inkling, I'm not exactly very masculine, and getting less so by the day.
But he never suspected. Maybe because we see each other every day, he didn't pick up on the changes. I don't know.
We spoke for a couple of hours. There were a lot of long silences where I let him think. He doesn't understand it, but he's is fully supportive.
I honestly expected the worst. I never thought this day would come. I had a bag packed with clothes and meds and my laptop, ready to leave if things went badly. I did not expect this at all.
I have been crying tears of joy all night.
I still am.
I can move forward now.
Tomorrow, I tell my work.
It was possibly the hardest conversation I've ever had.
I've been on HRT for 6 months, and figured perhaps now is the time to say something before it gets any more noticable. I thought he would have an inkling, I'm not exactly very masculine, and getting less so by the day.
But he never suspected. Maybe because we see each other every day, he didn't pick up on the changes. I don't know.
We spoke for a couple of hours. There were a lot of long silences where I let him think. He doesn't understand it, but he's is fully supportive.
I honestly expected the worst. I never thought this day would come. I had a bag packed with clothes and meds and my laptop, ready to leave if things went badly. I did not expect this at all.
I have been crying tears of joy all night.
I still am.
I can move forward now.
Tomorrow, I tell my work.
Title: Re: Finally came out to my dad last night.
Post by: helen2010 on October 08, 2014, 03:54:04 AM
Post by: helen2010 on October 08, 2014, 03:54:04 AM
Paeonia
What a great outcome. Your father sounds like a great dad and I think that you are both very lucky that you have each other.
Aisla
What a great outcome. Your father sounds like a great dad and I think that you are both very lucky that you have each other.
Aisla
Title: Re: Finally came out to my dad last night.
Post by: Alice Rogers on October 08, 2014, 04:03:31 AM
Post by: Alice Rogers on October 08, 2014, 04:03:31 AM
The hardest conversation has been had, grats on that. There will be plenty more though, the readier you are with answers for him the better. I had to work hard to dispel my dad's media induced notions that I was some sort of deviant or ->-bleeped-<- sex worker (hate that word *shudders*).
Once he realised I was still me and I wasn't morphing into some freak he was ok.
Alice
xx
Once he realised I was still me and I wasn't morphing into some freak he was ok.
Alice
xx
Title: Re: Finally came out to my dad last night.
Post by: Athena on October 08, 2014, 09:06:33 AM
Post by: Athena on October 08, 2014, 09:06:33 AM
I'm glad to hear it went so well.
Title: Re: Finally came out to my dad last night.
Post by: Paeonia on October 09, 2014, 03:54:49 AM
Post by: Paeonia on October 09, 2014, 03:54:49 AM
Thank you all for the kind words and support.
And now I have made the first step toward coming out at work this morning, that being to tell my boss what is happening. He is sympathetic and supportive, and will chase the HR department to find the right person to offer support there.
I'm the first transgender person to be a part of this office, so he has no idea where to get support or what the policies are (other than the zero tolerance policy on discrimination).
I suppose this is all perfect timing for national coming out day.
And now I have made the first step toward coming out at work this morning, that being to tell my boss what is happening. He is sympathetic and supportive, and will chase the HR department to find the right person to offer support there.
I'm the first transgender person to be a part of this office, so he has no idea where to get support or what the policies are (other than the zero tolerance policy on discrimination).
I suppose this is all perfect timing for national coming out day.
Title: Re: Finally came out to my dad last night.
Post by: Paeonia on October 15, 2014, 10:29:44 AM
Post by: Paeonia on October 15, 2014, 10:29:44 AM
My manager told the company director (I did say he could, so it wasn't out of the blue or anything) and today was the first time the director was in the office. I have never had a look like that from someone before, I think it was some form of fairly acute realisation. All those subtle little changes have added up, as I look a lot different like my company photo now. Not quite enough to look outwardly trans, but once it's pointed out, I suppose its suddenly obvious.
I can't stop smirking, and it's taking every ounce of willpower to not turn into a complete giggly mess.
I don't know why this amuses me so much.
I can't stop smirking, and it's taking every ounce of willpower to not turn into a complete giggly mess.
I don't know why this amuses me so much.
Title: Re: Finally came out to my dad last night.
Post by: Alice Rogers on October 16, 2014, 02:15:12 AM
Post by: Alice Rogers on October 16, 2014, 02:15:12 AM
Quote from: Paeonia on October 15, 2014, 10:29:44 AM
My manager told the company director (I did say he could, so it wasn't out of the blue or anything) and today was the first time the director was in the office. I have never had a look like that from someone before, I think it was some form of fairly acute realisation. All those subtle little changes have added up, as I look a lot different like my company photo now. Not quite enough to look outwardly trans, but once it's pointed out, I suppose its suddenly obvious.
I can't stop smirking, and it's taking every ounce of willpower to not turn into a complete giggly mess.
I don't know why this amuses me so much.
Lets hope all the reactions you get cause gigling hun! I would say things have started out pretty well! Congrats!
Alice
xx