Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Hello,
I am Jessika (Yes, the "k" is correct).  ;D
I am 47 and known since I was little that there is something different about me. I dressed in Sisters and Moms clothes and the dressing ramped up over the years.

At 18 I joined the Military thinking I could brush off the feelings I have but they were lingering and there seemed no escape. I got married to a wonderful Lady and we have been married 21 yrs now and still are. I did retire from the Military after 20 yrs in of service in 2005 with an Honorable discharge.

My wife knows I dress and have done so many times. I am 6ft 210lbs (Just lost 10 lbs over the last month) but I have a broad physique so it's mostly top heavy.
I kinda hint towards my wife what is getting stronger in regards to feelings and just about 3-4 days ago she asked me "When are we going to tell everyone you're coming out?"

I was surprised she knew that term, "Coming out". I told her I will decide the right time and "IF/When" I am diagnosed by a therapist. She also thinks my condition is not real and does not understand it yet.
Well, I have been in contact with a Post-Op Lady that is Retired Military and she has been a great help.

I also contacted a Gender Therapist and I will schedule my first Therapy session on Monday if all goes well.   :)

So, I am very happy to be here and meet new people that in one way or another experienced the same feelings as I have, and now trying to put it all into perspective.

Jessika or "Jess"

A big warm welcome to the family Jessika! I think you are very wise to wait until an official diagnosis to notify everyone. It shows a great deal of patience and wisdom. Your story is so much like everyone here and parts are familiar to me as well. Welcome and no that we do not judge and anything we can do to help you in your journey just ask. I am so glad you appear to have an accepting SO and be sure to give a big hug for us. Relax and dig right in!!  :)

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Thank you so much.
I do not think my Wife is "Supportive" in the way it sounds as she does not fully understand it all. She thinks it is mostly a phase. My Therapist will prove the final verdict when the time comes.
I look forward to a lot of reading here. Believe it or not, I came across this site a long time ago and lingered around on and off, never thought much about it. Now I think a lot about it and wish I had listened to feelings of times past instead of fighting them.
I'm here now and hope the journey down the road I choose will be a happy one at the end. :)

Jess

PS. Do I need to type in the three Anti-Bot answers below in every post? ;)

Hi Jessika, (https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fsmileys.on-my-web.com%2Frepository%2FAnimals%2Fmini-panda-21.gif&hash=aa747892f6a13c54e75506a3acf0e22ade9c95e9)

Welcome to our little family. Over 14400 members. That would be one heck of a family reunion.

Feel free to post your successes/failures, Hopes/dreams.  Ask questions and seek answers. Give and receive advice.

But remember we are family here, your family now. And it is always nice to have another sister/brother/SO/member. (https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fsmileys.on-my-web.com%2Frepository%2FAnimals%2Fferret-3.gif&hash=f49e2f86761323f2abd9c33941920389dbb3b10f)

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fsmileys.on-my-web.com%2Frepository%2FAnimals%2Fferret-5.gif&hash=cfc7a68438be4575d8493dfbe65d1b3586f10b81)
Janet  )O(

Hay Jess!  Welcome to the community sis! :D ♥︎*Hugs*♥︎

Your story is all too familiar to everyone here, as I'm sure you'll notice yourself as you read what others have been through :)  There's tonnes of information floating about too so you should find everything you need.  If you need any pointers, advice, help etc, all you need to do is ask :)

Your partner sounds like she's quite accepting, which will prove invaluable on your journey (wherever it takes you).  If she thinks this isn't real though, you should give her some info on Gender Dysphoria (http://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/Gender-dysphoria/Pages/Introduction.aspx (http://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/Gender-dysphoria/Pages/Introduction.aspx)).  That might help her to see that it's a recognised medical condition and not something that's just made up in your head.  Hope that helps :)

♥︎*Hugs*♥︎ sis!  And welcome to the family! :laugh: ♥︎

Hi, Jess!  Welcome to our little oasis among the internets!

You sound like you might be the super self-analytic type like me.  I know you'll find the information and support you need here.  :)

Hi Jessika, welcome to the site! Thank you for your service, we have a lot of veterans at Susan's:  Roll Call  (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,96755.0.html) See you around the site!

Hugs, Devlyn