Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Let's put some traction behind this! Take the pledge!

                                                                                        Action Pledge

Take the original R-Word "My Words Matter" Pledge by Jenna Glatzer:

"I pledge that I will not use the words "retard" or "retarded" to mean "stupid." I understand that this is hurtful to people who have disabilities and people who love them, so I will be careful with my words. I will also try to remember to pay attention when other people use these words, and I'll ask them to stop. "

http://therword.org/

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi1279.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fy537%2FDevlynMarie%2F_a14BvjnplHyJqEziNEkh20QIxB7YnYULwFzgqOHG5oDvtSXidF1UeRCR1G72GskACFo6uImw529-h495-nc_zpsff359aa6.jpg&hash=94fa5a3dfdd43b4026a77baa28ec88e6b5c8677c)

I don't need to pledge, haven't used it for over 15 years... :)

Retard is a verb, not a noun.

Good on ya, Grace!

Quote from: Jill F on November 07, 2014, 01:50:56 PM
Retard is a verb, not a noun.

That's right!

Having a friend with a beautiful Downs Syndrome daughter made me realise pretty quickly how destructive language can be for marginalised and disadvantaged people, as if being trans and having to deal with the T word wasn't obvious enough!

I don't need to take the plunge either I never have and never will use of this word. I've always felt it to be very degrading because my father used it on me. I never have stood by and let anybody else use it in my presence.

I won't take the pledge as I really don't use that word, but I will say "Ridiculous" is a great subsitute.

"You are ridiculous."

"This is ridiculous."

I'm going the join the others on this. I've never used that word for anything or anyone. Honestly it's not hard to see that words can hurt people, and while i agree constantly watching what you say isn't an option some things can be done without much effort.

I make it a policy to not use words I feel are used wrongly or as an insult for more then just the person you use it for. And when people politely point out they're hurt by the way I say something I'll simply apologize, same thing as bumping into someone really. Just say sorry and move on.

I'm not into using perjoratives of any kind.  If someone is being an a*hole, I just call them an a*hole.  If someone is being a d-bag, I just call them a d-bag. 

I haven't used it since I was in grade school and it was the "cool" thing to say. Of course, no one was using it against anyone with an actual disability back then... but it still just made us look dumb. Like most everything else we said and did at that age. And I can't imagine saying it now. It feels so childish to call someone that. Do people still use that, even? I'm surprised there are enough people using it to warrant a pledge. I haven't heard it in so long that I had no clue what the "R word" was even referring to until I read it.

Quote from: Pikachu on November 07, 2014, 04:45:56 PM
I haven't used it since I was in grade school and it was the "cool" thing to say. Of course, no one was using it against anyone with an actual disability back then... but it still just made us look dumb. Like most everything else we said and did at that age. And I can't imagine saying it now. It feels so childish to call someone that. Do people still use that, even? I'm surprised there are enough people using it to warrant a pledge. I haven't heard it in so long that I had no clue what the "R word" was even referring to until I read it.

Oh, it's alive and well, trust me......

Yays to everyone who doesn't need to pledge, I'm proud of all of you for already dropping this term!  :)  I found this Public Service Announcement:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T549VoLca_Q&feature=youtube_gdata_player

I don't use it unless I'm talking about slowing some process or something down and its clear in my use that its for that purpose. When I was growing up, my grandmother worked at a state mental hospital in Georgia and she would use poor terminology for them and it always bugged me.

Quote from: Jaime R D on November 07, 2014, 06:21:58 PM
I don't use it unless I'm talking about slowing some process or something down and its clear in my use that its for that purpose. When I was growing up, my grandmother worked at a state mental hospital in Georgia and she would use poor terminology for them and it always bugged me.

  :) Bless you!

I'm not a fan of the NEVER EVER NOT EVER A ONCE SAY IT thing.

My older sister is profoundly mentally retarded. That's why I don't say it as an insult. Because it has an established use as a diagnostic term. I fully intend to continue using it when I have to talk about her diagnosis, and I don't think people take that usage into account.

This thread is making me happy.

My brain is not wired right. I've had so many different labels applied to me over the years that I'm just going to stick with that description. In school I was developmentally behind the other kids in pretty much everything. I was mocked often with the R word. I was teased and bullied for being in special ed classes. I dealt with teachers who saw me as a problem.

So I hate that word. Unless of course it's used in the way Nicodeme is talking about. That's something different. I don't think that's a current diagnosis but I may be wrong and it may depend on where you are it. As a diagnosis there shouldn't be any shame in the word, just like there should be no shame in the word trasngender. It's just a descriptor then, not a judgement.

I don't use this word, and I haven't heard anyone else use this word in at least a decade--not even my students. A couple of years ago, they used to use "gay" a lot, of course.

Well said, Devlyn. It is an ugly word.

Why stop there, what about "idiot", "imbecile" and "moron"?

Quote from: Servalan on November 08, 2014, 07:48:43 AM
Why stop there, what about "idiot", "imbecile" and "moron"?

Apparently all these words were once medical terms, and retarded was another medical term introduced to replace them. Here's one of many links I found.

http://www.todayifoundout.com/index.php/2010/03/the-words-moron-imbecile-and-idiot-mean-different-things/

Got to wonder how the meaning of words changes like this.

It's not just those words. A lot of words had significantly different meanings at different points in time. Language evolves with the times. And words also have different meanings depending on location. Just like the word "->-bleeped-<-" being used to refer to a cigarette in some places, while in others it would be seen exclusively as a homophobic slur.

I'd argue that the impulse towards pejoritivism itself can be far more perfidious and revealing of one's character than simple word choice.

So I should tell my young friend who is a regular participant in the Special Olympics that the words he uses to describe the condition of he and his friends is a bad word and that he shouldn't use it any longer? As if he already feels a little less significant! As for me this stuff doesn't sit well at all as I live in a free country and can still freely think my own thoughts and speak my own mind without submitting to the mind controlling PC mumbo-jumbo that the group-think crowd espouses here. It's no-one's fault when a Down's Syndrome child or any child with a mental disability comes into the world and I applaud the parents who decide not to abort, because some of these kids are such a blessing in so many ways. On the other hand when some woman is bitter about her child's condition and draws national attention to a word, her agenda is to will it away as if it doesn't exist and the rest of society has to bear the brunt of her bitterness including all who suffer these disabilities who just want to blend in like some other people I know here.

Context

Oh, don't assume I'm in any way part of the language policing crowd just because I don't personally use the word, Shan. I would never tell anyone what words they should or shouldn't say. I'm very much against all the politically correct policing that goes on these days, whether or not it affects me personally.

I don't use the word, but I couldn't care less if others do.

Quote from: Jill F on November 08, 2014, 02:22:37 PM
Context

yup!

Shantel, FYI, Special Olympics started the whole thing: http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spread_the_Word_to_End_the_Word

Quote from: AnonyMs on November 08, 2014, 08:08:53 AM
Apparently all these words were once medical terms, and retarded was another medical term introduced to replace them.

That's right, which is why I posted them ;)

Censorship is the wrong approach, a slippery slope.  It's not language, but attitudes that have to change.

Quote from: Servalan on November 08, 2014, 05:23:15 PM
That's right, which is why I posted them ;)

Its good to see I'm not the only one who likes the subtle approach.

Quote from: Servalan on November 08, 2014, 05:23:15 PM
Censorship is the wrong approach, a slippery slope.  It's not language, but attitudes that have to change.

I don't think that's going to happen, ever.

Quote from: Pikachu on November 08, 2014, 12:22:31 PM
It's not just those words. A lot of words had significantly different meanings at different points in time. Language evolves with the times. And words also have different meanings depending on location. Just like the word "->-bleeped-<-" being used to refer to a cigarette in some places, while in others it would be seen exclusively as a homophobic slur.

While language changes generally, I think there's something special about these words. There's racial ones that started out like this too. The meaning changes from medical or neutral descriptive words, and turns into pejoratives, especially because people think groups that these words describe are inferior. I'd imagine there are some for the transgender community too, but insulting people is not really my thing. I stay away from terms that describe actual real groups of people.

Quote from: christopher on November 07, 2014, 09:44:40 PM
I don't think that's a current diagnosis

*shrug* as far as I know the medical language has remained unchanged. Thankfully, slang has shifted.

It's okay for the oppressed group to use whatever words they want to describe themselves and not okay for anyone else to use any words that person in said group has stated is offensive.  This goes for all oppressed groups; transgender, queer, non-whites, disabled people, non neurotypical people, women, etc

If I wanted "group think" I'd head off to Fox News.

Because some people in the USA and elsewhere like to use the word "retarded", does not mean that the rest of us have to. That too is a choice.

There has been an Increased use of phrases like "don't be so retarded!"  And "that's so gay". You can't physically stop people from using offensive terms but you ca discourage their use. The term "that's PC gone mad!" Is usually just an excuse to have a free rein to be as rude and offensive as we like. I choose not to use those terms. Again, if I want political correctness, I'll head to the "free-thinkers" back at Fox News.

Please refer to ToS

5. The posting of messages on the chat or forums which are of a threatening tone; intended solely to communicate sarcasm, contempt, or derision; are intended to belittle or ridicule a person or group; to disgust the viewer; contain obscene or pornographic materials; which are intended to titillate; or which depicts illegal acts; will not be permitted.

10. Bashing or flaming of any individuals or groups is not acceptable behavior on this web site and will not be tolerated in the slightest for any reason.  This includes but is not limited to:
Advocating the separation or exclusion of one or more group from under the Transgender umbrella term
Suggesting or claiming that one segment or sub-segment of our community is more or less legitimate, deserving, or real than any others

Have I or anyone else here violated the ToS?

Quote from: Servalan on November 09, 2014, 04:57:15 AM
Have I or anyone else here violated the ToS?

I never said you or anyone had. I was pointing out that insulting, deriding or deliberately offending people is already banned.

OK...

Quote from: Nicodeme on November 08, 2014, 10:16:58 PM
*shrug* as far as I know the medical language has remained unchanged. Thankfully, slang has shifted.

We're talking about words that can hurt people. Your empty speculation is less than helpful.

http://www.m.webmd.com/children/intellectual-disability-mental-retardation

The first sentence from the Webmd link:

"Intellectual disability (ID), once called mental retardation, is characterized by below-average intelligence or mental ..."

I have pointed out the site rules.

Topic locked