Susan's Place Transgender Resources

So my brother is hanging with us for the holiday week and he's talking to his gf on the phone, while looking on the computer. He looks at facebook and tells me that one of his friends from church is trans. And I ask are they mtf or ftm and he's like its a she. And I'm like no, was she born a female and they feel male on the inside or a male that feels they're a female inside. And he's like no she just dresses like a dude and is gay for girls. And I'm like, dude, that doesn't make her trans that just makes her a gay butch.

And he's like, "No she's a trans."

"Are you sure? Cause if she says she's gay for women then she's a butch, or if  'she' is trans, they be straight."

And then he's like "NO She's not Transgender, she's a transsexual."

T__________T

So then I further educate my brother on the world of Trans, and how transgendered folks don't feel the gender they were born and the difference between pre-op and post-op. But he continues to tell me what I'm saying is wrong and that Transexuals are only people that are pre-op. And then he refers to ftm as females getting penises attached or the "females with dicks."

The conversation makes me very angry and offended especially since he doesn't know I'm trans. I feel like I need to come out to him about being trans so he f**king listen to what I'm saying. It makes me angry how he's going to tell me how a trans person is.  >:(

(sorry about the bleeping but I'm very mad at the moment.

That's unfortunate. Maybe he will be open to learning about it when you come out?

I think you handled the situation very well. Even the most ignorant person needs to start somewhere. Even if your brother only grasps a teensy little bit of what you say then you have had a victory. The trick is to build on it! :)

Quote from: Edge on November 22, 2014, 11:39:24 PM
That's unfortunate. Maybe he will be open to learning about it when you come out?

I sure hope he does when I do. But that's going to be a minute tho. So I'm trying my best without giving myself away.

Quote from: Ms Grace on November 22, 2014, 11:51:53 PM
I think you handled the situation very well. Even the most ignorant person needs to start somewhere. Even if your brother only grasps a teensy little bit of what you say then you have had a victory. The trick is to build on it! :)

I'll try my best to educate him more. I think the main problem is that his teacher at school is teaching about the Trans community very poorly.

You could also mention that gender identity and sexuality are two different things. A lot of people seem to get hung up on that and think that one determines the other.

Quote from: Contravene on November 23, 2014, 05:49:45 AM
You could also mention that gender identity and sexuality are two different things. A lot of people seem to get hung up on that and think that one determines the other.

I see this a lot, but I guess that's not much of a surprise since I live in Arkansas. Thanks to living here, I had no idea trans people even existed until I found tumblr a few years ago (I think I was 24 or 25), and then my gender identity kind of hit me like a ton of bricks. "Well, that explains a few things..."

My roommate knows that I'm trans and is more accepting than most people around here, but no matter how often I explain things to him he still gets a lot of fundamental things incorrect. I think the best we can do is keep explaining when we have the energy for it. I hope he figures it out sometime, and that things go well with you and your transition!

Quote from: Contravene on November 23, 2014, 05:49:45 AM
You could also mention that gender identity and sexuality are two different things. A lot of people seem to get hung up on that and think that one determines the other.

Yeah I should sit him down one of these days and talk to him about that as well.


Thanks for the replies everyone.I feel better.