Susan's Place Transgender Resources

A short story about my encounter...

I was around 11 years old. There was this transguy in my town, he was about 5 years older than me. When I played outside he sometimes would come to me and started bullying me. As weird as it seems, it wasn't really bullying. He would block my path and draw me into a corner to grab me, while saying to me: "I will release you when you say you are a girl", "Say it!", and so on. He never hurt me. I was clueless my whole life. If only I had listened to him back then... I think he saw for what I was, and am today. Some 20 years later I finally accepted it. Back then I did not know he was a transguy. I just thought he was a guy. It is a strange story, but I've mulled over it's meaning for way too long. So I thought I share it.

What do you think?

Quote from: PinkCloud on November 27, 2014, 07:10:15 PM
A short story about my encounter...

I was around 11 years old. There was this transguy in my town, he was about 5 years older than me. When I played outside he sometimes would come to me and started bullying me. As weird as it seems, it wasn't really bullying. He would block my path and draw me into a corner to grab me, while saying to me: "I will release you when you say you are a girl", "Say it!", and so on. He never hurt me. I was clueless my whole life. If only I had listened to him back then... I think he saw for what I was, and am today. Some 20 years later I finally accepted it. Back then I did not know he was a transguy. I just thought he was a guy. It is a strange story, but I've mulled over it's meaning for way too long. So I thought I share it.

What do you think?

you were a kid... you can't hold that against yourself now. keep in mind that he was wrong to grab you and forcibly attempt to make you out yourself. and anyway, as a young child, most don't know the proper terminology; you feel it, but don't know what it is.

Really creepy even if he was trying to help.

Quote from: White Rabbit on November 27, 2014, 08:22:06 PM
Really creepy even if he was trying to help.

Yeah, I've no way of knowing the intention behind it but the behavior's not appropriate. It's nobody's place to tell someone else their gender in such a way.

Quote from: blink on November 28, 2014, 01:27:53 AM
It's nobody's place to tell someone else their gender in such a way.

Ever!
It might be ok to suggest maybe you might want to look into other options but never to outright tell you or in this case to force you to say what he thinks.

Doesn't really sound as if he was trying to help you =/.

QuoteAs weird as it seems, it wasn't really bullying.

It was bullying. No one who actually wanted to help would ever act that way. It sounds like this guy had some real problems.

Quote from: PinkCloud on November 27, 2014, 07:10:15 PM
A short story about my encounter...

I was around 11 years old. There was this transguy in my town, he was about 5 years older than me. When I played outside he sometimes would come to me and started bullying me. As weird as it seems, it wasn't really bullying. He would block my path and draw me into a corner to grab me, while saying to me: "I will release you when you say you are a girl", "Say it!", and so on. He never hurt me. I was clueless my whole life. If only I had listened to him back then... I think he saw for what I was, and am today. Some 20 years later I finally accepted it. Back then I did not know he was a transguy. I just thought he was a guy. It is a strange story, but I've mulled over it's meaning for way too long. So I thought I share it.

What do you think?

So, how did you come to discover that he was a transguy

Thanks for the replies.

Much later I learned he was previously born a girl, years later, that rumor was being spread. I grew up in a small town so eventually everyone knew. I did not understand any of it by then. Never heard about anyone who transitioned, I was really ignorant and young I guess.

Yes, I now see how it actually was bullying... he grabbed and shook me, telling me to confess. The weird thing is though, I kept saying I was a boy. When I look back, I try to make sense of it... At the one hand, he might saw something about me that I wasn't even sure of myself... maybe he was trying to help me in some weird way... or maybe not. I am not even sure why I am telling this, it's just something from my past, a piece of the puzzle.

You could always track him down and ask.

Quote from: PinkCloud on November 28, 2014, 06:26:24 PM
Thanks for the replies.

Much later I learned he was previously born a girl, years later, that rumor was being spread. I grew up in a small town so eventually everyone knew. I did not understand any of it by then. Never heard about anyone who transitioned, I was really ignorant and young I guess.

Yes, I now see how it actually was bullying... he grabbed and shook me, telling me to confess. The weird thing is though, I kept saying I was a boy. When I look back, I try to make sense of it... At the one hand, he might saw something about me that I wasn't even sure of myself... maybe he was trying to help me in some weird way... or maybe not. I am not even sure why I am telling this, it's just something from my past, a piece of the puzzle.

dont beat yourself up about it, its in the past and you cant change it now :)

Weird is definitely a good word for it, kind of unsettling. Sounds more like the guy was projecting his problems on to you as a form of validation for both him and you. Odd is definitely a good term. I far from agree with the actions, as pure as his motives probably were in his head. What matters is that you can look back at it and see it as a weird kind of stepping stone towards understanding.