Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Post operative life => Topic started by: Apple on November 30, 2014, 12:31:46 PM Return to Full Version
Title: Dilation making vagina feel non-special?
Post by: Apple on November 30, 2014, 12:31:46 PM
Post by: Apple on November 30, 2014, 12:31:46 PM
Hello, I'm pre-op and I wonder what can dilation do to one's relation to their vagina. A vagina is quite a special place. Inserting huge dilators daily and having to work them a lot could make it somehow less... special. I'm worried about some kind of mental desensitisation. Like, having masturbation urges before hrt while hating the genitals made me learn to ignore anything I felt there. Now it takes a lot of concentration to turn off this "ignoring" in order to feel touches there.
...on the other hand, I'm inserting lots of food and toothbrush into my mouth every day, and yet it doesn't decrease my enjoyment of kissing, so perhaps my worry is completely unnecessary...
...on the other hand, I'm inserting lots of food and toothbrush into my mouth every day, and yet it doesn't decrease my enjoyment of kissing, so perhaps my worry is completely unnecessary...
Title: Re: Dilation making vagina feel non-special?
Post by: Mai on November 30, 2014, 12:43:00 PM
Post by: Mai on November 30, 2014, 12:43:00 PM
just an idea.
im guessing it would depend on what you would consider special. if you can find a way to make dilating a special time for you, then it doesnt make having to do so un-special.
if your in a relationship have him/her help you with it. light candles/insence put on some relaxation music and meditate. make the time spent dilating a special time to you and think positive about it.
what is special to 1 person, might not be for someone else. it is special, cause its yours, if you find a way to make it special. i wish i could have mine, but will have to wait, will come in time. after spending "X" number of years with the wrong parts, and finally getting the parts that are more correct, id think it would kinda be hard for then to not be special to you.
im guessing it would depend on what you would consider special. if you can find a way to make dilating a special time for you, then it doesnt make having to do so un-special.
if your in a relationship have him/her help you with it. light candles/insence put on some relaxation music and meditate. make the time spent dilating a special time to you and think positive about it.
what is special to 1 person, might not be for someone else. it is special, cause its yours, if you find a way to make it special. i wish i could have mine, but will have to wait, will come in time. after spending "X" number of years with the wrong parts, and finally getting the parts that are more correct, id think it would kinda be hard for then to not be special to you.
Title: Re: Dilation making vagina feel non-special?
Post by: Jenna Marie on November 30, 2014, 12:46:12 PM
Post by: Jenna Marie on November 30, 2014, 12:46:12 PM
Yeah, personally, I treat dilation as a minor chore - one which has nothing to do with sex. :)
The initial weeks the whole area was a surgical site, too, so I never really saw it in a sexual context during the whole high-dilation/high-maintenance period. (Sort of like how recovering from childbirth is distinct from making babies, I'd think!) Once it healed up and I started to think of it as my genitals instead of a surgical site, my mindset also shifted towards imagining having more fun with it.
There are cis women who have to dilate to deal with vaginismus or other issues, so now I look at it the same way, as a minor weekly task I do to keep everything shipshape for the good stuff. Toothbrushing is a good analogy!
Honestly, I'm more amazed that my wife can ever see it as attractive, after nursing me through those first few weeks... and then she reminds me that once a month hers is constantly leaking nasty fluids and she's sticking giant wads of cotton up there to deal with it, and that one thing vaginas are *known* for is requiring un-sexy maintenance. Oddly, I find that kinda comforting.
The initial weeks the whole area was a surgical site, too, so I never really saw it in a sexual context during the whole high-dilation/high-maintenance period. (Sort of like how recovering from childbirth is distinct from making babies, I'd think!) Once it healed up and I started to think of it as my genitals instead of a surgical site, my mindset also shifted towards imagining having more fun with it.
There are cis women who have to dilate to deal with vaginismus or other issues, so now I look at it the same way, as a minor weekly task I do to keep everything shipshape for the good stuff. Toothbrushing is a good analogy!
Honestly, I'm more amazed that my wife can ever see it as attractive, after nursing me through those first few weeks... and then she reminds me that once a month hers is constantly leaking nasty fluids and she's sticking giant wads of cotton up there to deal with it, and that one thing vaginas are *known* for is requiring un-sexy maintenance. Oddly, I find that kinda comforting.
Title: Re: Dilation making vagina feel non-special?
Post by: Jessica Merriman on November 30, 2014, 12:47:11 PM
Post by: Jessica Merriman on November 30, 2014, 12:47:11 PM
Um big difference between a hard piece of plastic and a warm, well, you know. I don't see any future problems with separating the two. ;D
Title: Re: Dilation making vagina feel non-special?
Post by: mrs izzy on November 30, 2014, 02:45:40 PM
Post by: mrs izzy on November 30, 2014, 02:45:40 PM
Post
What Jessica said
What Jessica said
Title: Re: Dilation making vagina feel non-special?
Post by: PinkCloud on November 30, 2014, 03:05:05 PM
Post by: PinkCloud on November 30, 2014, 03:05:05 PM
When I don't have any pains while dilating, it actually feels OKAY to almost an enjoyable tickling sensation, especially when it comes out. The neo vag seems more sensitive than I imagined it would be. But I am far from enjoying it in a sexual sense... yet.