Susan's Place Transgender Resources

So, I've told my therapist multiple times that I don't like talking about myself and that the only reason I'm doing this is to get surgery referral letters. I don't need someone to help me process my thoughts or help walk me through troubling times. I understand that she needs to know certain things so that she can include them in her referrals, but seriously? It just seems so ridiculous to me. Like, sorry I didn't have a troubled childhood that we can delve into, my only issue in life is being born in the wrong body. And yeah, that sucks. But there is literally nothing else for me to reflect on.

UGH. Sorry, needed to vent. I seriously want to drop her because she's doing nothing for me, but I want to get my top surgery scheduled for before April and I don't think I have the time to get in and started with another therapist. I could pay for surgery in full, in cash tomorrow. So frustrating.

This was the biggest reason why I went through informed consent. Have you told her this? Is she a gender therapist as well?
Surprisingly enough, I could pay top surgery off if I so wished now but that money's for school.

She is a gender therapist, and she is well aware of her function. I told her that I'm going the informed consent route for hormones because I don't want to wait longer just to have her tell me something I already know. Unfortunately it's slightly rarer to find a (good) surgeon who doesn't require a referral, though I'm open to suggestions on that end.

I rage e-mailed another therapist and basically dangled my money at him a few minutes ago. I'm also going to talk to my doctor about it on Friday and see if she can't help me figure something out.

It just sucks. I don't want to seem like a big jerk, but I seriously want her to draw me up an outline of what she wants to cover in each session and how long she thinks it's going to take. I need her letter 3 weeks before surgery but I can't schedule surgery without the letter. The surgeon I want to go with is already booked through February. I need to be fully functional by June, or I'll have to wait until next winter.

I understand your frustration there... and I know of a therapist that is easy to talk to, and doesn't get into that b.s. and knows that it isn't her place to be a gate keeper... she is very good in her work and has written books, etc..but that being said, she isn't cheap.  She is my therapist, and an awesome one.  She does skype appointments for those out of state, but I've never had to do that with her yet.  PM me if you want to know her info.

Either way, hang in there and be truthful... it will all be over one day and you won't have to deal with it any longer...hugs

An update and a question -

I spoke with two different therapists yesterday to see what their proposed timelines would be for getting me a referral letter for top surgery. Both conversations went well, but I'm definitely leaning towards one more than the other. My online concern is potential future requests should I want bottom surgery. This therapist says they have a colleague who will gladly write a secondary letter - and the description matches the therapist I'm currently trying to leave. Do you think this would be an issue? If it is indeed the same therapist, could I request a letter from someone else?

I'm relatively ambivalent about bottom surgery due to the cost, but if it were an option one day, I wouldn't want to have to jump through hoops just because I had offended a therapist years earlier.