Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Never thought I would feel blessed to be different but I do.  We find out how much love people can give when we are real and they are forced to be real with their feelings.
I am not ashamed to be me.. I feel lucky to be me and to live a life of adventure and being different is a good thing.
We get to grow in ways many CIS folks never could dream of.  We find compassion for others that some never find.
Diversity in life is a wonderful thing.  Just thought I would share my feelings as I have changed so much over the year and more change is to come,
Keri :)

We truly are a very strong unique form of humanity.

I am with you i feel blessed.

Nothing to add, just like this post very much. Thank you Carrie

This kind of topic always strikes nerves close to my heart.

I'm sorry, but a condition that results in the massive loss of life ( through suicide or violence ) cannot be a blessing. The mortality rate disturbs me :(. So many cries not heard, so much blood lost and spilt. It brings me to my knees to remember those who've lost or taken their lives over a condition they were born with.

I acknowledge that those of us who prevail usually grow to be strong and beautiful people, but given the loss of those who don't prevail, no, I don't feel it's a blessing. I'm sorry, but this is the way it feels.

Quote from: SammyRose on December 10, 2014, 04:36:58 PM
This kind of topic always strikes nerves close to my heart.

I'm sorry, but a condition that results in the massive loss of life ( through suicide or violence ) cannot be a blessing. The mortality rate disturbs me :(. So many cries not heard, so much blood lost and spilt. It brings me to my knees to remember those who've lost or taken their lives over a condition they were born with.

I acknowledge that those of us who prevail usually grow to be strong and beautiful people, but given the loss of those who don't prevail, no, I don't feel it's a blessing. I'm sorry, but this is the way it feels.

I used to think just like that... But rather than being overwhelmed by the weight of the world for all the things we go through, rather than feeling pity for all the others who never really stood a chance I now believe that without all these things we would never be like we are... One would rather choose being like blank canvas for there are no stains, no blemish but we - we are true living characters through our passage of time - and even with all the dark shadows right behind us we still keep going... going... going...

Can't you see how beautiful hope is?

Quote from: carrie359 on December 10, 2014, 04:18:29 PM
Never thought I would feel blessed to be different but I do.  We find out how much love people can give when we are real and they are forced to be real with their feelings.
I am not ashamed to be me.. I feel lucky to be me and to live a life of adventure and being different is a good thing.
We get to grow in ways many CIS folks never could dream of.  We find compassion for others that some never find.
Diversity in life is a wonderful thing.  Just thought I would share my feelings as I have changed so much over the year and more change is to come,
Keri :)

Very nice post! Thank you for sharing such positivity!

Hugs, Devlyn

Quote from: SammyRose on December 10, 2014, 04:36:58 PM
This kind of topic always strikes nerves close to my heart.

I'm sorry, but a condition that results in the massive loss of life ( through suicide or violence ) cannot be a blessing. The mortality rate disturbs me :(. So many cries not heard, so much blood lost and spilt. It brings me to my knees to remember those who've lost or taken their lives over a condition they were born with.

I acknowledge that those of us who prevail usually grow to be strong and beautiful people, but given the loss of those who don't prevail, no, I don't feel it's a blessing. I'm sorry, but this is the way it feels.

Meh, there's a time and place for everything. This is Carrie's thread about feeling good. I think it should have been left that way.

This behaviour really irritates me. Why is it so difficult to see someone else happy? Why must people always come in and trash a positive thread? Everyone is free to start a "Isn't this horrible?" thread, but they prefer to rain on someone else's parade. You know why? Because it's easier to knock someone who's tired from climbing off the ladder than it is to climb it yourself.

Real heartfelt truths there, very uplifting... can't add anymore to Carrie's statement :-*

L Katy

Quote from: Hanazono on December 10, 2014, 08:07:38 PM
a survivor of struggles is hardened...
I am not invalidating anyone's views or opinions. but I wonder if their views would change after experiencing similar struggles.

So why not wonder it in a thread made for it? You're derailing someone's happy day. If this happens during my upcoming birthday post, someone is getting a snootful of cake, I'll tell you that right now!  :laugh:  >:-)

Hi Keri,

Some of the other posters are right, maybe I should have said nothing. I hope my post didn't impact the way you feel. There certainly is a silver lining for us.

And I've nothing but well wishes and happiness for you. It's been inspirational to watch you change and develop from that person a year ago ( before transition was even a consideration ), to now when you're taking on the world and winning. Congratulations, and love. I hope everything does fall your way.

xx

I think it is a blessing as well to be transgender.  It has given me unique insight into the world that only being transgender could give me.  It changes how you see the world, especially gender, but many other areas as well.  For me it has put my in a place to advocate for change and make the world a better place, something that I am eternally grateful for.

Hey Girls,
Well I have grown so much and am so healthy mentally kind of hard to hurt my feelings...... Unless you were to say my boobs are too small LOL.
Anyway I do understand where SammyRose comes from on that because there is so much pain that we do go through but times are changing especially for the younger trans people..
The pioneers that came before us and even us are making a difference in the world..
So I am good girls.. all is good.
Keri

Quote from: carrie359 on December 10, 2014, 04:18:29 PM
Never thought I would feel blessed to be different but I do.  We find out how much love people can give when we are real and they are forced to be real with their feelings.
I am not ashamed to be me.. I feel lucky to be me and to live a life of adventure and being different is a good thing. . .

Nice post.  I have to say that in ways I like being trans, but I'm not sure why.  I think one reason is that I've only been out a short time (2 years), so the life is still a bit new to me and I'm thoroughly enjoying being me.  Another reason might be the "life of adventure" you mention.  Life certainly is more interesting when you're trans.  And like you, I don't mind being different.

Quote from: SammyRose on December 10, 2014, 04:36:58 PM
This kind of topic always strikes nerves close to my heart.

I'm sorry, but a condition that results in the massive loss of life ( through suicide or violence ) cannot be a blessing. The mortality rate disturbs me :(. So many cries not heard, so much blood lost and spilt. It brings me to my knees to remember those who've lost or taken their lives over a condition they were born with.

I acknowledge that those of us who prevail usually grow to be strong and beautiful people, but given the loss of those who don't prevail, no, I don't feel it's a blessing. I'm sorry, but this is the way it feels.

Sammy, I can certainly sympathize with this post, and I see no reason why you shouldn't raise this question on this thread.  I'd like to ask you a question, though.  For me, there are two main problems connected with being trans: (1) gender dysphoria itself, which some feel more keenly than others; and (2) society's treatment of transpeople.

Now suppose (2) wasn't a problem.  Suppose we were totally accepted by society and free to live our lives as we please.  Would that change your view of the situation?  I suppose what I'm asking is, which do you see as the bigger problem?  Or do you give equal weight to both?

I feel it as being positive for the most part myself. For the first time in my life I feel in touch completely with who I am.
The negatives including the mortality rate are a result of a backwards and prejudice society that is slowly changing for the better. I was shocked when I discovered how much support I have. However while Huntsville is in Alabama, many people argue its not really Alabama at all.
While I've lost a sister and another sister is struggling, I've also learned just how much my parents, remaining sister, and extended family love me.

Quote from: SammyRose on December 10, 2014, 04:36:58 PM
This kind of topic always strikes nerves close to my heart.

I'm sorry, but a condition that results in the massive loss of life ( through suicide or violence ) cannot be a blessing. The mortality rate disturbs me :(. So many cries not heard, so much blood lost and spilt. It brings me to my knees to remember those who've lost or taken their lives over a condition they were born with.

I acknowledge that those of us who prevail usually grow to be strong and beautiful people, but given the loss of those who don't prevail, no, I don't feel it's a blessing. I'm sorry, but this is the way it feels.

Quote from: Foxglove on December 11, 2014, 12:55:49 PM
Nice post.  I have to say that in ways I like being trans, but I'm not sure why.  I think one reason is that I've only been out a short time (2 years), so the life is still a bit new to me and I'm thoroughly enjoying being me.  Another reason might be the "life of adventure" you mention.  Life certainly is more interesting when you're trans.  And like you, I don't mind being different.

It certainly is like no other, the wild ride that we're on while transitioning. The fear, the anxiety, the success, confidence and prevalence. It's mind boggling to even look back at my own transition, and mine appears smooth compared to some.

Quote from: Foxglove on December 11, 2014, 12:55:49 PM
Sammy, I can certainly sympathize with this post, and I see no reason why you shouldn't raise this question on this thread.  I'd like to ask you a question, though.  For me, there are two main problems connected with being trans: (1) gender dysphoria itself, which some feel more keenly than others; and (2) society's treatment of transpeople.

Now suppose (2) wasn't a problem.  Suppose we were totally accepted by society and free to live our lives as we please.  Would that change your view of the situation?  I suppose what I'm asking is, which do you see as the bigger problem?  Or do you give equal weight to both?

Yes, the reality of our situation would change if there was total acceptance by society. To me, that is the root of the problem. The messages I received as a child from all adults about gender and sexual diversity was terrible... I won't go into detail. This is what made dealing with myself so difficult... I didn't want to be all of those things that I was told I would be. And I would attribute this treatment of us by society and family for a bulk of the depression which leads to people taking their own life. Yes, dysphoria is hard to cope with, but with total support and acceptance, it's hard to see this as a cause for loss of life.

Quote from: SammyRose on December 11, 2014, 03:55:42 PM

Yes, the reality of our situation would change if there was total acceptance by society. To me, that is the root of the problem. . . Yes, dysphoria is hard to cope with, but with total support and acceptance, it's hard to see this as a cause for loss of life.

Yeah, this is the way I see it.  As we all know, it's not always fun being trans.  It creates special problems of its own.  But it seems to me that generally speaking, we are able to cope with gender dysphoria.  It's no fun, and some people have a much harder time with it than others.

But society doesn't help matters.  Some people do their best (or worst) to make our situation impossible.  Take that factor out of the equation, and we'd be much happier.  Speaking personally, as long as people aren't hassling me, I'm happy enough.  Lots of things I wish were different, but I get by.

For me, it's one of the ironies of ->-bleeped-<-: lots of people call us sick, and then they proceed to make things worse.  Imagine if people did everything they could to make things worse for a child who's suffering from leukemia.  That would be regarded as cruel and inhumane.  But they have no problem doing that to a child who's suffering from gender dysphoria.

Quote from: Foxglove on December 12, 2014, 02:52:35 AM
Yeah, this is the way I see it.  As we all know, it's not always fun being trans.  It creates special problems of its own.  But it seems to me that generally speaking, we are able to cope with gender dysphoria.  It's no fun, and some people have a much harder time with it than others.

But society doesn't help matters.  Some people do their best (or worst) to make our situation impossible.  Take that factor out of the equation, and we'd be much happier.  Speaking personally, as long as people aren't hassling me, I'm happy enough.  Lots of things I wish were different, but I get by.

For me, it's one of the ironies of ->-bleeped-<-: lots of people call us sick, and then they proceed to make things worse.  Imagine if people did everything they could to make things worse for a child who's suffering from leukemia.  That would be regarded as cruel and inhumane.  But they have no problem doing that to a child who's suffering from gender dysphoria.

Foxglove,
Wow,
This is what I have said to some.. its like when a Christian said to me.. God does not make mistakes.. and I need to be the man God wants me to be...
Then I say.. hmmm when children are born with deformed bodies, have cancer then the church is compassionate to them.. but not to me because of their ignorance.
I and we deserve to be helped like any other human.
So when I say I am blessed to be trans part of the blessing is the ability to look past others fear.. for me, humans who do not understand or care about me and who I really am just do not count in my life and I feel sorry for them.. they are shallow and ignorant.
On the other hand, those who see me for who I am and love me count a million times more than the ignorant ones.
Therefore I have grown.. I am blessed.
Keri

Quote from: SammyRose on December 10, 2014, 04:36:58 PM
This kind of topic always strikes nerves close to my heart.

I'm sorry, but a condition that results in the massive loss of life ( through suicide or violence ) cannot be a blessing. The mortality rate disturbs me :(. So many cries not heard, so much blood lost and spilt. It brings me to my knees to remember those who've lost or taken their lives over a condition they were born with.

I acknowledge that those of us who prevail usually grow to be strong and beautiful people, but given the loss of those who don't prevail, no, I don't feel it's a blessing. I'm sorry, but this is the way it feels.

I understand your feelings but I've learned, especially from my therapist, that it's not my fault that I am who I am and I refuse to blame myself or anyone else like me for the evil that society throws at us. Other societies have seen transgender people as a blessing. So I too see being trans as a kind of blessing.

The condition of being transgender itself doesn't cause loss of life. Bigotry and hatred from others, a deliberate choice on their part, is what causes the loss of life.

We're forged by life into something stronger. When one of us falls by the wayside, the others lift them back up. We lose some of our own and remember their loss and sacrifice. Few other categories of people can aspire to that. The only other groups I can think of are voluntary, marines, police, emergency workers. We are chosen by fate and yet we step up. Reviled or not who wouldn't be proud to be among us if they truly understood?

Hugs Keri,

I think last year for me was a year of healing and this year is a year of growth and blooming. I really have changed and I am a different person. I really like the person I am becoming. 

I am so lucky. I am in our community and I am so thankful I have a good job with benefits and understanding people that I work with and for.

There are a lot of people helping me. Mental health, physical health, socializing and support.

I guess I am really surprised at how accepting most people are.

I think I am lucky.

Quote from: Cynthia Michelle on December 12, 2014, 08:38:16 PM
Hugs Keri,

I think last year for me was a year of healing and this year is a year of growth and blooming. I really have changed and I am a different person. I really like the person I am becoming. 

I am so lucky. I am in our community and I am so thankful I have a good job with benefits and understanding people that I work with and for.

There are a lot of people helping me. Mental health, physical health, socializing and support.

I guess I am really surprised at how accepting most people are.

I think I am lucky.

Cynthia,
I am surprised to how accepting people have been. I am so comfy with myself now I can tell anyone ... its a freedom I never thought I would have.. I am getting ready to post a story about coming out that last two days to others.. that do not yet know and how that went..
Love
Keri

It is positive in some ways, to watch my body improve at an age when most others begin to decline, and I like the greater empathy, open mind and tolerance that never would have occurred if I myself had not been transgender. Finding oneself, and learning to accept others in the process, is a beautiful combination.

With that said, given all the ways I have suffered both physically and emotionally, and so many others have too, it is hard for me to see it as a blessing. Life would be so much better for me if I had been born as a cis girl.

Thank you for your positive posts Keri.  I am one of those who sees the glass as half full.  These are the cards we were dealt and how we play the game of life is still one of choices.  for too long I chose to feel transgender couldn't be me and now to see being transgender as an answer and life status that we learn about and deal with to the best of our abilities.

Make the most of who you are folks, the rest is denial of yourself in my opinion.

Quote from: Steph34 on December 13, 2014, 12:23:06 PM
It is positive in some ways, to watch my body improve at an age when most others begin to decline, and I like the greater empathy, open mind and tolerance that never would have occurred if I myself had not been transgender. Finding oneself, and learning to accept others in the process, is a beautiful combination.

With that said, given all the ways I have suffered both physically and emotionally, and so many others have too, it is hard for me to see it as a blessing. Life would be so much better for me if I had been born as a cis girl.
[/quote

Hey Steph,
Just wanted to mention one thing..  I am not sure my life would have been better had I been born CIS..  I made lemonade out of lemons and coped well.. so if I had been born a CIS female or male I would not be me.. who I am is who I am... for me although its been painful.. all people including CIS folks have pain and things that happen in life... so just being healthy is a blessing in itself.. and alive..   so life is good.. so good!
Keri]