Susan's Place Transgender Resources

I know I've asked this before but I feel like I can't live a fake life anymore.I want to feel the happyness of the people I've read about on this forum. The problem is I still haven't found a job after six months of looking and my depression and gd does not help. Also I live at home with my dad and brother,  but I do have savings if things get to the worst. I don't know whether to stick it out or not. I know he won't accept me, call me mentally ill bcos of stuff in the past. Although I do plan on writing a detailed letter about my past, present and future. What should I do? I have no life at all bcos I'm trans.

that is an issue that is better worked out between you and a therapist, there are so many positive and negative effects without living your life that is not a question that can be answered on line

If you are ready sometime we just need to jump feet in.

I changed my name and full time and applied at the job as me.

That way I did not need to come out twice.

In your situation I would recommend confiding in one or two good friends. For you, now, I would guess transition hinges on Whether or not you are able to find a job. Until you do, id say you should play it safe, and tell someone who, if they don't accept you, cannot compromise a roof over your head. Confide in a trusted friend, but I wouldn't come out to my family until transition is imminent and you are not so reliant on them.

Good luck!!!

I wouldn't risk homelessness, if you can't stand on your own. I would try to line up a job and your own place firsts

If they're unlikely to be supportive and just make you feel worse about yourself there's probably nothing to be gained by telling them. Not sure if coming out is the real issue for you here anyway - certainly finding that job, and helping yourself get out of that living situation and boosting your confidence seems really important. You may feel like you have no life at the moment but you do and you can have even more. :)

Personally, I wish I would have come out sooner. Even if I was not going to go full time. That written. Coming out completely changed my life and not always for the better. Now living full time, I still have very depressing periods. I lost my wife (and best friend.) I lost other friends. I spend a lot less time with my kids. I miss them so much. I lost a ton of money in my divorce.

Nevertheless, there is no other way I should live. The feeling of honesty with which I meet everyone, today, cannot be overrated.

Either path is probably going to be very tough. For me, it really was not a choice. It was not "if" it was "when" in that sense, I waited too long.

But my warning is this, do not expect it to cure your depression. Maybe it will maybe it will not.

Whatever you decide, you have as least six people who cared enough to write back to you here, we care.  Regardless of your decision, please keep telling us how you are doing.  Keep us posted.

Kind regards, Danielle

Thanks, I really appreciate the replies. I think I'm going to wait until I get a job and then come out. I keep having more depression spells lately and I feel like life just isn't worth it. Reading your answers has helped. Unrelatetedly,  I posted another question that I'd like opinions on if you have the time. Thanks again.

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