Susan's Place Transgender Resources

So, my Dad told me that he wants to come and stay with me, because of his health issues, and financial difficulties... which is fantastic, it really makes me happy, but this means that I couldn't wait to tell him about my plans... I don't want him to regret coming here when he finds out, so I had to send him and email, explaining everything. I didn't want to do it over the phone.

He hasn't replied yet, but I hope that his reaction isn't too bad, and he still wants to come...

Good luck, I hope this goes well for you. Sometimes life gives us a shove, doesn't it?

Hugs, Devlyn

Good luck. I came out to my dad because he is going back to the old country and wanted me to keep his car for him until he comes back in a few months.

Unfortunately he hasn't replied to me and I think he's just not talking to me.

But you gotta do what you gotta do and it's better you tell him before he comes over.

Good luck, I hope he welcomes your change.

Thanks everyone! I really hope that he does take it well, and still wants to come. It's only been a few hours, but I hope that he responds soon. He needed my address so that he can mail some stuff here, and I just included the explanation in the email, so he should have been expecting it.

This is the email he just sent me, I feel like I should just quote it all... "Greetings, thank you for sending me your mailing address.  In regards to the other issues that you brought to light I must say this comes as quite a surprise.  I had no idea that you were having such inner struggles. You should know that regardless to what might be going on in your mind and heart I am and will always be your father, as such when I look at you I see my child to whom I love with all my heart.  You are who you are, my kid now and forever.  Don't worry about what people think just reconcile your spirit and be you.  I think it is probably a good idea to keep this between you and I and what ever health care professional or group you seek counseling from.  We will discuss this in a further detail when I arrive in early April.  In the meantime don't do anything stupid that you might regret in the future. You should always know if you need to talk to me I will listen, I find this difficult to understand but I know one thing for sure you are NOT a sexual deviant, you are a wonderful person with a good heart to whom I am very proud of.  I don't want to hear you refer to yourself in a negative way like I'm a sexual deviant  remember self loathing can only bring shame heartache and dark thoughts which are the things I hate."

I'm kind of shocked, although not surprised that he thinks that I should keep it private, and at least said that he doesn't really understand what I mean...

He even avoided using gender pronouns...

Your Dad is a real man and a wonderful father!

Quote from: Cindy on January 14, 2015, 12:31:15 AM
Your Dad is a real man and a wonderful father!

Thanks, I kind of knew that fears were unjustified, but I really didn't want to take the risk, I don't think that I would have been able to recover from too bad of a reaction. My sister told me that he wouldn't take it too badly as well.

I'm really happy about it. I told him that I'd call him tomorrow.

Elsa, that is an solid first step... I am happy for you, trust the phone call goes well... I think he has certainly coming to a half way point, which is a good beginning.

xoxox

L Katy :-*

Quote from: Elsa Delyth on January 13, 2015, 10:46:59 PM
This is the email he just sent me, I feel like I should just quote it all... "Greetings, thank you for sending me your mailing address.  In regards to the other issues that you brought to light I must say this comes as quite a surprise.  I had no idea that you were having such inner struggles. You should know that regardless to what might be going on in your mind and heart I am and will always be your father, as such when I look at you I see my child to whom I love with all my heart.  You are who you are, my kid now and forever.  Don't worry about what people think just reconcile your spirit and be you.  I think it is probably a good idea to keep this between you and I and what ever health care professional or group you seek counseling from.  We will discuss this in a further detail when I arrive in early April.  In the meantime don't do anything stupid that you might regret in the future. You should always know if you need to talk to me I will listen, I find this difficult to understand but I know one thing for sure you are NOT a sexual deviant, you are a wonderful person with a good heart to whom I am very proud of.  I don't want to hear you refer to yourself in a negative way like I'm a sexual deviant  remember self loathing can only bring shame heartache and dark thoughts which are the things I hate."

I'm kind of shocked, although not surprised that he thinks that I should keep it private, and at least said that he doesn't really understand what I mean...

He even avoided using gender pronouns...

I think this is great! It sounds like he's processing this very well for a couple hours into it. This made my morning!

Hugs, Devlyn

Quote from: Elsa Delyth on January 13, 2015, 10:46:59 PM
This is the email he just sent me, I feel like I should just quote it all... "Greetings, thank you for sending me your mailing address.  In regards to the other issues that you brought to light I must say this comes as quite a surprise.  I had no idea that you were having such inner struggles. You should know that regardless to what might be going on in your mind and heart I am and will always be your father, as such when I look at you I see my child to whom I love with all my heart.  You are who you are, my kid now and forever.  Don't worry about what people think just reconcile your spirit and be you.  I think it is probably a good idea to keep this between you and I and what ever health care professional or group you seek counseling from.  We will discuss this in a further detail when I arrive in early April.  In the meantime don't do anything stupid that you might regret in the future. You should always know if you need to talk to me I will listen, I find this difficult to understand but I know one thing for sure you are NOT a sexual deviant, you are a wonderful person with a good heart to whom I am very proud of.  I don't want to hear you refer to yourself in a negative way like I'm a sexual deviant  remember self loathing can only bring shame heartache and dark thoughts which are the things I hate."

I'm kind of shocked, although not surprised that he thinks that I should keep it private, and at least said that he doesn't really understand what I mean...

He even avoided using gender pronouns...

I almost cried when I read that, it's so nice reading about a positive reaction

Yeah, I was still kind of skeptical, but I just got off the phone with him, and talked to him for three hours. He basically told me that he's completely opposed to all of the hate from conservatives, and talking about how god hates this or that group. He said that he doesn't care about those things, they have nothing to do with morality. He cares about deeds, and not identities, or harmless lifestyles. Love is what matters above all else -- and that this doesn't change anything.

I'm kind of in shock, and don't quite yet know how I feel about it. I can just say that I didn't expect this at all. We talked about our plans when he comes out here.

I didn't really get into details, and still not sure that he completely understands the gravity -- but he told me that he's never trusted the sensationalism of the media...

See my mom had like the opposite response... a really outlandish negative reaction -- I was basically a disgusting pervert...

It brought me to tears thinking about my dad possibly rejecting me, or hating me, or considering me a disappointment, but I don't really feel anything about this reaction for some reason. Like, just normal. Maybe it needs to sink in, or I don't really believe it until I see it, and see his real world reactions to my transitioning, and the people I associate with. He's always been very compassionate though, and my sister said that if dad has taught us anything, it is unconditional love.

Elsa this is a wonderful news ;)

I am happy for you girl xoxo

Quote from: carmenkate on January 14, 2015, 09:05:22 PM
Elsa this is a wonderful news ;)

I am happy for you girl xoxo

Thanks a lot! :D

I'm feeling really good now, back to normal.

I hope that things are still going well for you, too.

This is so awesome, Elsa! Made me teary. :')

That is just too sweet :D

Thanks for sharing this with us, Elsa. It's really great to see! You really do have a great dad!

My heart skipped a beat when I read yr father's response, Elsa. That's absolutely wonderful. :)

Thanks everyone! :D