Community Conversation => Transgender talk => Topic started by: goinggirl on January 15, 2015, 08:12:30 AM Return to Full Version

Title: So many thoughts
Post by: goinggirl on January 15, 2015, 08:12:30 AM
Okay, so here it is in a nutshell.  I'm 35 years old and have never been in a gay relationship (mainly because I'm in the closet).  I'm very much attracted to men.  I've been told that I'm very handsome and have never had a problem finding a girlfriend.  I have always been very feminine.  On top of this, I have a womanly shape and gynomastia (A cup woman-like breasts) even though I am by no means overweight.  SOOO, my issue is that I really think I'm transgender and not gay.  Is that possible?  I really like women and find them attractive but I'm not crazy about sleeping with them.  I remove my body hair as much as possible to be even more feminine.  On top of this, I have always felt funny when being addressed as "sir" or referred to as a man, even though I know full well that's what I am.

I'm sorry for the poorly thought out paragraph above.  However, it was written just as I feel - scatterbrained!
Title: Re: So many thoughts
Post by: Mariah on January 15, 2015, 08:18:24 AM
The best way to help sort through this is to find a good gender therapist. They can help you sort these feelings. If your trans too that is great, but if your not that is cool too. Hugs
Mariah
Quote from: goinggirl on January 15, 2015, 08:12:30 AM
Okay, so here it is in a nutshell.  I'm 35 years old and have never been in a gay relationship (mainly because I'm in the closet).  I'm very much attracted to men.  I've been told that I'm very handsome and have never had a problem finding a girlfriend.  I have always been very feminine.  On top of this, I have a womanly shape and gynomastia (A cup woman-like breasts) even though I am by no means overweight.  SOOO, my issue is that I really think I'm transgender and not gay.  Is that possible?  I really like women and find them attractive but I'm not crazy about sleeping with them.  I remove my body hair as much as possible to be even more feminine.  On top of this, I have always felt funny when being addressed as "sir" or referred to as a man, even though I know full well that's what I am.

I'm sorry for the poorly thought out paragraph above.  However, it was written just as I feel - scatterbrained!
Title: Re: So many thoughts
Post by: Jason C on January 15, 2015, 11:28:19 AM
Absolutely. A lot of people feel confused about their sexuality because they're confused about their gender identity. But the thing is, your sexuality doesn't matter with regards to your gender. You can be gay, straight, bisexual, anything. It's more about how you feel about yourself, and so, I'd suggest seeing a gender therapist, or trying to take steps to exploring your gender identity and seeing how you feel.
Title: Re: So many thoughts
Post by: goinggirl on January 15, 2015, 11:42:15 AM
Thanks for the reply.  It's so confusing and frustrating, and can be overwhelming at times...  I'm finally finding the courage to get some answers.  Reaching out to transgender people is my first step, so again, I thank you.