Susan's Place Transgender Resources

I just noticed yesterday while shopping that I started looking at men. This is a relatively new sensation for me. I've never really cared before or had any interest. It's exciting but scary. I'm afraid I'll attract the wrong crowd. I just got to be positive and see what happens :)

Sabrina,
I know just how you feel... I've always been attracted to women but within the last couple of months that attraction has changed. I was told that this could happen. The hard part for me is the letting go and letting it come naturally. It's hard not to think about am I gay now? No!!! Because I identify female because I am female I'm not gay. I'm just a little confused by it all right now. Anyway hag in there girl...

I have noticed that a few of my old guy friends are a lot cuter than I remember them being. It still surprises me each time I notice.  I'm not ready to explore that interest yet.  But once I am established in my new gender role it should be interesting,  I. too, find it more than a little confusing and scar right now.

I'm kinda/sorta hoping this happens.  Just a little bit.  Not enough to make me want to actually pursue one (I'm happily married) but maybe just enough so I'll feel more "typical".  I know that's a horrible reason but that's the only one I can come up with.  Maybe there's just a part of me that's convinced my wife will still be attracted (at least a little bit) to males so perhaps I'm wanting to balance it out or something?  Or maybe I'm just planning ahead in case my wife wants to get experimental in the future.  I don't know.

For now, I can't stand to even see my own dude-suit parts in the mirror let alone somebody else's.  I guess I'll find out eventually.

As for you, hooray!  Finding reasons to think fondly of strangers is hard enough so any reason (even attraction) can be viewed as a positive thing.  It just makes you like even more people than you did before! 

Totally happening to me too. Thankfully my wife is understanding. Understanding but not one to share. At least I have someone to talk to when a cute guy walks in.

Hi Tori,

do you not worry that you will stop being attracted to your wife completely and in the end separate?

I couldn't bear that happening, if that were to happen to me.

Not really.

It just is what it is. I wasn't going to cheat on her with another woman. Now I won't cheat on her with another person.

More people to look at now. I am so physically attracted to women, and guys are just so clueless and cute. Different attractions, for now.

My wife understands my attractions are shifting. She understands if I need to explore. It will end our marriage if I do but not our bond and friendship.

Hi,
My first post. I just went to my therapist for the 1st time. Have not started anything like my sisters here, but feel I must in order to feel whole.
Feeling ancient at 59. Since just admitting I realize men are my ideal partner. Everytime I go the grocery store one young man makes me smile inside and shyly outside. My partner of 14 years wants the old me but my true self broke the eggshell from the inside. And I, silly one, sigh and wish I could see him eat spagetti and hear him snore. Silly sad me

In order for my prinz to come so must I. That vacuum we all feel is as natural as blue skies, isn't it?

And? Guys can be super hot, they can also be creepy and gross.  It's hard not to notice them and be intrigued by the arcane ways of men, at least in my humble opinion.
The best part is when they start notice you as well.  It can be a huge ego boost... unless they are creepy/gross.  Those times kinda nauseate me.  It's like, "Why is he staring at my chest?  Oh right, I have boobs now... Ugh, he's still staring..."


     Hugs,
- Katie
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Is funny that, I do see some men that have all the classic features of uber-man-appeal like the strong, square jaw, strong forehead, muscles and you feel pretty inadequate next to these fine specimens of maleness especially when they are great at doing their job or anything else they do...not sure if i could get my head around being attracted to a man in that way even after going through transition.

Sometimes I find myself looking a bit too long at some attractive women because i am thinking I wish I was her. or had her body or admiring the good/sexy clothes i wish i could wear.  Must seem a little creepy if your caught looking

:D

Sabrina, as someone who wasn't attracted to anyone coming into this I wasn't ready at first for men to come to me or even be attracted to me. The interest in guys hit me like a brick wall a couple of months ago. I'm finding as I get further into my relationship with a guy that I'm getting comfortable doing and been seen doing different things that I would have even considered 4 months ago. As time goes on I'm noticing guys and how appealing I find them more and more which I took note of when I reading a magazine yesterday. I kept looking back at the ad with this amazing looking guy in it. If the wrong crowed does get drawn to you just firmly let them no your not interested and don't be afraid to say No. Regardless of what you do your safety is the most important thing. Hugs
Mariah

Quote from: Audietta01 on February 12, 2015, 03:30:58 AM
Hi,
My first post. I just went to my therapist for the 1st time. Have not started anything like my sisters here, but feel I must in order to feel whole.
Feeling ancient at 59. Since just admittin
Re: Waist
« Reply #1 on: Today at 07:57:09 am »
Quoteg I realize men are my ideal partner. Everytime I go the grocery store one young man makes me smile inside and shyly outside. My partner of 14 years wants the old me but my true self broke the eggshell from the inside. And I, silly one, sigh and wish I could see him eat spagetti and hear him snore. Silly sad me

In order for my prinz to come so must I. That vacuum we all feel is as natural as blue skies, isn't it?

Welcome Audietta01 glad you joined the forum  :-*
I am just 2 more than you..

I can't say I have had an awakening as such, but I do notice men and have once or twice fantasized....

Boring Eh?

But on the other hand I look at women, mainly for fashion, mannerism's, makeup etc...

Hmmmm maybe It'll get better  ;)

L Katy  :-*

Fortunately for me, my guy friends aren't my type. It would be kinda awkward. But I'm not sure exactly what my ideal type of man is. I'll know what my type is when I come across him :)

Before hrt was only attracted to women.. as hrt took its hold and my body and mind changed and settled into life as woman I started looked at men in a different way.. maybe dating a man was not so ewww anymore.

I was scared, being a attracted to a man was one thing.. but would I be able to handle being held by one or even kissing him... Then a friend of a friend needed a date for a work function.. and my friend said.. why don't you take noleen as a friend. The evening went well.. and we kinda hit it off.. It was very weird at first been on date with man.. but it was nice too.. it felt right..we started dating.. and the first kiss and making out the first time and even sleeping with him was weird at first.. but again it felt nice and right. I was pre-op at this time and he was fine with it.. as he was kinda bi-sexual.. the relationship ran its cause..

after srs.. I met a wonderful guy, who now is my boyfriend.. i really love him and I love it when he holds me or kisses me on my neck. Sex is wonderful with him... I love being the female in the relationship.. i love when he buys me jewelry or just brings me flowers. I now a straight woman. the boys are yummy

Yeah I am kind of attracted to men these days too, but I am very picky.

A guy friend of mine has gotten very friendly since I came out to him but I really don't want to get involved with him.

And I am not about to give up on our marriage with an extramarital affair, as tempting as it seems.

Given that some of us repressed and/or denied our transgender truth isn't it reasonable that some have been equally good at repressing orientation??  Once we break down the walls and throw off the shame and guilt it would not surprise me that other discoveries can occur.  And, of course, orientation does not mean we must act on every acknowledged attraction or fear we are missing something.  I have been in a few loving and meaningful relationships with men.  What has been consistent is that I have usually imagined and quietly enjoyed myself as a girl.  Now I can be out about it all, what a relief!

Quote from: Tessa James on February 12, 2015, 11:49:50 AM
Given that some of us repressed and/or denied our transgender truth isn't it reasonable that some have been equally good at repressing orientation??  Once we break down the walls and throw off the shame and guilt it would not surprise me that other discoveries can occur.  And, of course, orientation does not mean we must act on every acknowledged attraction or fear we are missing something.  I have been in a few loving and meaningful relationships with men.  What has been consistent is that I have usually imagined and quietly enjoyed myself as a girl.  Now I can be out about it all, what a relief!

I dunno - I have been thinking about this, but... I used to go to gyms, saunas, swimming pools and saw lots of naked men in locker rooms and it was always like "ewwww.... gross". Now...it's totally different (and I am not very happy about that fact cause dating women is easier and safer too). Of course, he would need to be my type, and being a strong woman, I am only attracted to strong men :D I need to be sure that he can protect me and that he is strong enough to handle me when I get too wild :D.

I could possibly see my self finding guys attractive, but I can't comprehend ever desiring them sexually. The thought of that thing is just gross. So if I were to ever actually get interested in guys, I can't see sex happening ever. Probably the best reason to stick to girls. Not that I'm having any luck with girls.

Quote from: Tessa James on February 12, 2015, 11:49:50 AM
Given that some of us repressed and/or denied our transgender truth isn't it reasonable that some have been equally good at repressing orientation??  Once we break down the walls and throw off the shame and guilt it would not surprise me that other discoveries can occur.  And, of course, orientation does not mean we must act on every acknowledged attraction or fear we are missing something.  I have been in a few loving and meaningful relationships with men.  What has been consistent is that I have usually imagined and quietly enjoyed myself as a girl.  Now I can be out about it all, what a relief!

very much so. My friends brought that to my attention early on when I had likely repressed it all those years. I was shocked to learn that, but not anymore as I look back I clearly see it.
Mariah


Sent from my Mariah's iPad using Tapatalk

I have always been attracted to women but I have noticed lately that I have been noticing guys with femme features. The rugged Marlboro men types don't do anything for me, but a guy that's got some femme looks will grab my attention.

Defnitely starting to have fantasies!! or rather, enjoy them, not repress them under a deep blanket of shame and denial... i love it!

life 2.0

I liked guys before. Let me tell you, its really weird though, the switch in dating pool from gay guys to straight guys. They are so different from the guys I knew/dated/whatever-ed with.  You think you know about dating and sleeping with men and I suppose I should have anticipated that, but, yeah, it was an 'oh ooooooohhhhhhkaaaay' moment for me.  I have never really hung around with, or talked to normal, heteronormative  guys and I don't really know how to fit in, in that respect. Unexpected oddness.

I've always been attracted to men and looked at them accordingly...  ::)

Actually I do like the idea of a male partner showering me with glittery objects as Noleen mentioned  8) and.... also nice cosy restaurant dinners... ahhhhhhhhh

I guess I can't say that I have never fantasized, just not been at front of mind especially ATM... other priorities.... but I did sort of think about it, especially after re-reading this thread, I guess in that case, I believe that once I am fully transitioned I think I would definitely like to be with a male partner...

Now I am doing to much thinking again  :-\

L Katy  :-*

Quote from: ♡ Emily ♡ on February 12, 2015, 12:01:06 PM
I dunno - I have been thinking about this, but... I used to go to gyms, saunas, swimming pools and saw lots of naked men in locker rooms and it was always like "ewwww.... gross". Now...it's totally different (and I am not very happy about that fact cause dating women is easier and safer too). Of course, he would need to be my type, and being a strong woman, I am only attracted to strong men :D I need to be sure that he can protect me and that he is strong enough to handle me when I get too wild :D.

Gee Emily you sound like a lot of girls I have met ;) ;D  There is something very intriguing and more about having a man want you but i also agree with Kira that straight guys are harder to understand now. 

I might prefer women, but Jensen Ackles and Hugh Jackman have been causing hot flashes for years. :icon_dance:

im surrounded by men at work all the time, they're about as noticeable as paint on a wall to me, i do wish i was attracted to them so that my relationships in the future would be easier to find a partner since im 6 feet tall and want a partner to make me feel small, i just wish i was a straight girl

Dave Navarro.  OMG, Dave Navarro.  OMG, OMG, OMG, Dave Navarro.  Now with serious pecs, nipple rings and and more tats.  Never mind the guyliner...  GAHHHH!!!  That is the sexiest man alive.

Check please!

Who knew that this would be such a popular topic? Especially with Valentine's day coming up, it would be nice to have someone spoil me :)

Well, there's a girl at work I like, but something about Depp as Captain Jack just does it for me! I think HRT is hinting at some bi leanings. Hooray! Double the size of the dating pool!

When I was in my mid 20s I got the double whammy of realising that I really liked guys and that I was trans all at the same time.  Oh, the guilt was really really bad, as I lived in an even more socially backward country than the rest of them were in the 1990s!

Fast forward to Madrid 2012, newly divorced, and there were a few cute boyfriends, all of whom are still friends, even though I'm now a girl.  The guy I was with in 2013, when I definitely realised I was going to become a woman, is coming to dinner tomorrow - a sort of escape from the silliness of St Valentine.  Nothing will happen, of course, as he's 100% gay, but I still find him exceptionally hot! 

Here's to orientational fluidity! Olé....  :D

Quote from: Madison (kiara jamie) on February 13, 2015, 01:49:56 AM
im surrounded by men at work all the time, they're about as noticeable as paint on a wall to me, i do wish i was attracted to them so that my relationships in the future would be easier to find a partner since im 6 feet tall and want a partner to make me feel small, i just wish i was a straight girl

I thought like this too, but I am finding that, there are quite a few advantages I hadn't really thought of being a girl who dates girls. More and more I wonder if my desire to be into boys was because I thought that would make me more normal. In any case, I just don't feel any attraction to men so it is a moot point. Still they aren't icky or anything so if I did find one attractive I would consider pursuing it. Hormones seemed to have increased my desire romantically and sexually with other women and that I have to admit makes me feel like even more of an oddball.

I'm a little weird I guess. I prefer women but am currently dating a man. He has been my best friend for years but its odd in that I guess I don't find his body attractive but his strength and size make me feel small and delicate and I love that. I wasn't repulsed by him at all and enjoyed being close with him. I'm weird.

I have been somewhat confused. I never find myself looking at men but I have one guy that I've been havin a late night rendezous with on occasion. I like the penetration but not so much anything else like kissing and such.
The male body hair is a turn off also.
I like to think about being submissive to a man sometimes though and even watching porn of this nature.

However, Transwomen really excite me and I envision doing everything with them. I am just realizing this and trying to make sense of it all but I believe I am a lesbian at heart. I imagine things could change later as others have said.

I've always been bi-ish in nature. I've slept with men before, even. It just...wasn't exciting. Definitely not my thing. But I damn sure don't mind looking!

Quote from: Tessa James on February 12, 2015, 11:49:50 AM
Given that some of us repressed and/or denied our transgender truth isn't it reasonable that some have been equally good at repressing orientation??  Once we break down the walls and throw off the shame and guilt it would not surprise me that other discoveries can occur.  And, of course, orientation does not mean we must act on every acknowledged attraction or fear we are missing something.  I have been in a few loving and meaningful relationships with men.  What has been consistent is that I have usually imagined and quietly enjoyed myself as a girl.  Now I can be out about it all, what a relief!

I agree.  I am  one who totally repressed my gender to the point I wasn't aware of it.  As I examined life as my appropriate gender I began to feel attracted to men.  This started before I began HRT, so it is me, not something in the girly juice.

It honestly surprises me how many of you prefer women :0
I guess im in the minority who can never see herself with another woman and prefers a guy who showers her with bling and Nutella

Quote from: Fanni on February 15, 2015, 01:42:50 AM
It honestly surprises me how many of you prefer women :0
I guess im in the minority who can never see herself with another woman and prefers a guy who showers her with bling and Nutella

OMG I love Nutella!  Totally agree with you about the rest too. [emoji6]


     Hugs,
- Katie
Sent from Katie's iPad using Tapatalk

Quote from: katrinaw on February 12, 2015, 08:05:20 AM
Welcome Audietta01 glad you joined the forum  :-*
I am just 2 more than you..

I can't say I have had an awakening as such, but I do notice men and have once or twice fantasized....

Boring Eh?

But on the other hand I look at women, mainly for fashion, mannerism's, makeup etc...

Hmmmm maybe It'll get better  ;)

L Katy  :-*

Hi

Nice to hear from you. I have a natural attraction to men and women...androgynous...right now I am not fixed. I love my partner but she wants her guy and no experimenting...so I just have to fix me...so tired of repressing my true self and being depressed because of it. Dysphoia is our self-healing voice...one has to tune in. It is also our intuition. It is there to save us.

I will help any way I can. Love to be there for you. [emoji4]

Audie

Quote from: Fanni on February 15, 2015, 01:42:50 AM
It honestly surprises me how many of you prefer women :0
I guess im in the minority who can never see herself with another woman and prefers a guy who showers her with bling and Nutella

Bling and Nutella is not bad - definitely survivable...  Can I aspire to propose diamonds and dark chocolate???  :D

Dark chocolate and Nutella?  Tumbled rocks are just inedible minerals.