Susan's Place Transgender Resources

no
obviously not, but i remember a while ago seeing someone in a thread remark that there seemed to be a lot of 20something transitioners represented among members, and a lot of 40something, and 50etc ones, but a gap in the 30s. is that a thing? i didnt know but it was interesting and did maybe seem to have some backing.
so i forgot but today went on ->-bleeped-<- and there we are, the 30somethings.
balance is restored!

well, bore-tresting anyway.

Never! I started transitioning at 33 :)

30's is definitly not to old. I started at 36 here. As long as your in good health, your never to old to to transition and even you wouldn't be to old.
Mariah

Quote from: carmenkate on February 19, 2015, 10:11:46 PM
Never! I started transitioning at 33 :)

I'm 29 and starting therapy soon. If I end up being diagnosed as transgender and somehow can talk myself into being brave enough to transition I am sure i'll be 30 when I take my first steps... That's the best I can do, sry :P

35 here.  I haven't started HRT yet but probably sometime shortly after I turn 36.  For the past 5 months I've been doing laser and gender therapy.  I would have done it much earlier- like 20 or 25.   A big thing that held me back was that I have so much thick facial hair.  I got sick of shaving super close and putting makeup on, time to try to kill the beard with laser.  I used to sit around and wonder when I would transition, but there are a lot of wacky reasons why I didn't.  First, I was a member of a small spiritual group of mostly transgender girls who uniquely believed that we could turn ourselves female purely through meditation.  This had me thinking, I don't need to transition because I'm already going to be a woman.  Yes,  I know it sounds crazy, but sometimes you will believe what you want to believe.  For awhile I thought that I'd just turn out ugly.  I think it will work out fine for me because I have a very feminine size and look very young for my age.  More time went by as I tried denial and to recondition myself.  Eventually I was just crossdressing a lot and my body became a lot more feminine due to my diet and I suddenly decided I desperately wanted an orchi to further feminize  myself.  At that point, I re-educated myself on HRT and just started falling into it with out being able to really stop myself :)

I think if somebody is meant for it, 31 is not too old.

I'm 36. Never too late. Almost 3 months HRT. 

Quote from: alexbb on February 19, 2015, 08:40:47 PM
no
obviously not, but i remember a while ago seeing someone in a thread remark that there seemed to be a lot of 20something transitioners represented among members, and a lot of 40something, and 50etc ones, but a gap in the 30s. is that a thing? i didnt know but it was interesting and did maybe seem to have some backing.
so i forgot but today went on ->-bleeped-<- and there we are, the 30somethings.
balance is restored!

well, bore-tresting anyway.

Well, I'm 67 and my therapist can't see any issues so, that probably answers that
Anna :-*

Unfortunately your rib cage and bones have settled by this point. So sure, you can transition. But your results won't be as good if you had started sooner.  I wish I had started back when I was ten years old myself. :(

Not to seen harsh, but...
Why ask?
I know how you feel. Really, I do. You are going through what we all go through. No one can validate this decision. We can support, we can give opinions and some facts.In the end it all comes from you. I am 45, and started HRT two weeks after my 45th birthday. It had come to a point where I could no longer be a man. I never was. Reality was all that was left for me. I took the plunge, and now I am happy.

You want reassurances? We all do sweetie. There are none to be had. I want so much to make it better for people like us. This step cannot be outsourced. It can only come from within. 20, 30, 40 50, or 60, this is the one thing that no one can help you with. I felt thesame way, I wanted someone to say that it was ok. It is ok. :) No one though, not on this site or any other, not a therapist or friends or family,  can tell us how it will turn out.

This I can say with certainty, if this is the path for you, you will never be able to hide from it. It doesn't go away, we are stuck with it. You can waste another decade like I did, or more. If this is who you are, you can not hide. Believe it.

You are in your thirties, ok, would forties, fifties or sixties be better?

This question is asked so many times, by me and many others, in so many ways. The question really is,'Will it turn out alright?' ...

No one can answer that.  I have been crying since I started a response. I don't know. I deal with the laughter and ridicule every day. Some people accept though, some people support. I stepped off the cliff, I hope that there is some form of normalcy at the bottom. For now, for once, I feel comfortable being me. That is enough.

I took the path less traveled, and that has made all the difference.

Mikaela

Quote from: Mikaela on February 20, 2015, 03:05:23 AM
Not to seen harsh, but...
Why ask?
You want reassurances? We all do sweetie. There are none to be had=
This I can say with certainty, if this is the path for you, you will never be able to hide from it. It doesn't go away, we are stuck with it. You can waste another decade like I did, or more. If this is who you are, you can not hide. Believe it.

Apologies to Mikaela for editing your quote piece
My input is simple, I was originally booked in to gender clinic in Melbourne back in 1987 when I was 40, did not go ahead as circumstances were really not suitable, now, has it gone away or, got better?
No, it does NOT go away and does not get easier to ignore and really just keeps eating at you and pushing it's viewpoint until you have to take notice.
Sorry if this is not really what you want to hear but the truth is there and cannot be hidden from indefinately
Anna :(






Mikaela

No definately not! In fact before 40 gets better results if you're looking for transition with HRT. Post 40 Effects of HRT are reduced or take longer... Err I can testify to that one  :-\

L Katy

43 - started therapy, hormones, electrolysis
45 - tracheal shave
49 - GRS surgery
50 - happier than ever and feel 35, not 50


So yes, there is no limit to happiness

FYI: I'm IS.

I started self medicating (DON'T DO THAT!!!  I have like five doctors now, with more to come because of Intersex stuff.) at thirty three, and I'm now 35.  However I really can't say anything on HRT, since I've had atypical results (basically no changes, except my breasts getting a bit bigger, and my voice changing just a tad.

(Please obey ToS, thank you)
Cindy

Started at almost 36. I'm 37 now and things are progressing nicely.
As apparent by the thread there' seems to be a lot more of us 30 something's active on the forum.

I started when I was 38, I've seen amazing transitions no matter what the age may be.

"Not to seen harsh, but...
Why ask?"

I took the title from the ->-bleeped-<- thread.... which... seems not to be where I put it in the initial post...


I should point out, I clearly dont think its too old or I wouldnt be transitioning. I love it!
People had commented on other threads that there seemed to be a deficit of 30something transitioners, so I was and am heartened to see it isnt the case.

It sure is nice to see so many happy 30+ ladies here. I am 36 and just starting. You all look so beautiful and it realy gives me hope.

I started HRT at 38 and I feel awesome and love who I am now ^_^
Of course, I think that getting to the point of loving who I am is the result of a lot of internal work, not just the external changes.

There is an existing older th read which has over 10 (20?) Pages for us in our 30s. There are many of us, but because of the issues we deal With due to where we are at this stage of life that girls in their 20s don't deal with (families, young children, established and blooming careers)...and girls in their 40s and up are often a bit more...established?? Less concerned over these same issues?? Anyway, my point is...we tend to be a lot more PRIVATE and quiet than the younger and older crowds, so we often appear as if we are not here.

But we are. And we probably forum lurk more than anyone else does. And I believe there are more of us than there are older girls...just...Not as vocal.

32 years old here, and I start HRT in about 3 weeks!

I think you don't hear as much about 30's transitioning, because it is kind of a tricky time to pull it off. A lot of us either have just started our careers, or just started families and have young kids, or both.

Personally i fall into this bucket, I'm early in my career, and have a young child. I wanted to start my transition about 5 years ago, but i wasn't ready, but sure if I was 28 still and didn't have the responsibilities I have now, things would probably be a lot easier.

but its never too old to be happy!!

I don't have any responsibilities, no fixed adress or much in the way of possesions, I never wanted anything because I couldn't have what I wanted. But I am a decade into a career and I have no college degree. I used to be an artist but I quit because well...didn't feel like I deserved it. Anyway, sorry to Debbie Downer it up over here. I do have options and was on the cusp of starting a buisness. In many ways I am more prepared. I know how to survive and persevere to a much greater degree than I did in my 20's. I've been in new start mode since I quit booze 3 and a half years ago. I guess that was my second early childhood, it felt like it. I learned how to be a person again, how to have confidence in myself. I am glad and certain that I am doing this exactly when I was supposed to.

Just a reminder on the links rules of the TOS.

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There are seven exceptions:

• Links listed added by the chat staff to the Transgender Bot (TGBot) in our chat
  
• Users on the chat may give other users links to their photographs and personal websites.
  
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I just started at 37.

I think that once you know, you should start. There is not a number that is too high!

Quote from: Kellam on February 20, 2015, 12:37:06 PM
I don't have any responsibilities, no fixed adress or much in the way of possesions, I never wanted anything because I couldn't have what I wanted. But I am a decade into a career and I have no college degree. I used to be an artist but I quit because well...didn't feel like I deserved it. Anyway, sorry to Debbie Downer it up over here. I do have options and was on the cusp of starting a buisness. In many ways I am more prepared. I know how to survive and persevere to a much greater degree than I did in my 20's. I've been in new start mode since I quit booze 3 and a half years ago. I guess that was my second early childhood, it felt like it. I learned how to be a person again, how to have confidence in myself. I am glad and certain that I am doing this exactly when I was supposed to.

yessss! love this attitude.
i think 30s are a great time to do it. no responsibilities, deliberately didnt go out with anyone for a year beforehand, no kids thank god, dont own anything nice except some old books my computer and my car, dont really care about possession particularly, used to drink like a fish, start the day with absinthe and red bull and go from there, but running my biz is more fun than being all drunk and dopy so just keep if for occaisional pissups. quite like driving to nights out so i dont feel compelled to drink, and actually quite like being sober and enjoy myself just as much. more really. enjoying jogging a lot now im not constantly coughing up grey stuff. a decade into my career so on much firmer ground than in my 20s..career prestige seems to have carried over reasonably smoothly; i work as a commercial artist so its all lefty liberals who like trans people and the work hasnt dried up .. and just generally more independent and confident used to getting my own way through relentless practice haha! i wasnt ready before, so very little kicking myself now, i think if id done it idve been all fertive and guilty and hated it. now its, just an amazing feeling of rightness all the time. obvs feel a bit awkward clearly being a ->-bleeped-<-, but i figure just be a chic happy ->-bleeped-<-. no dressing androgynously, just like, yep, i am exactly what i look like, a boygirl who is working on becoming a real girl. practice makes perfect. people find it exquisitely odd for a day or two then just sort of stop noticing. looking forward to hrt and laser a lot! i figure if it takes 3 or 4 or 5 years, its like taking a bachelors degree in being a woman, then a masters. i mean, makeup, body language, voice, hrt, laser, fashion, confidence, guys.. its a lot to learn!

i used to always, always have a cloud over my head. no matter what cool thing happened or who i was with, it was always there. it was awful. everything seemed cursed and flawed. now, plenty of problems, but no great Overproblem amplifying them all. so theyre just little problems not part of an army that had me surrounded.
itll be fine.

slow relentless grinding progress wins the race haha! that kind of thinking wasant really possible in my 20s.
i might make this my family crest
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.empire-cat.com%2FuploadedImages%2FEmpire_Southwest%2FNew_and_Used_Equipment%2FNew_Equipment%2FPopular_Equipment%2FCat%2520Bulldozers%2520Track%2520Tractors.jpg&hash=a0a30f01fa69d0ad026abb6a2042209951e3bfb7)

"First forget inspiration. Habit is more dependable. Habit will sustain you whether you're inspired or not. Habit will help you finish and polish your stories. Inspiration won't. Habit is persistence in practice."
Octavia Butler

I hear ya on being lucky workplace wise. I'm not too woried. I work in an art museum in a very liberal city in a state with lots of trans rights. I have also embraced the notion of transition. And knowing that for some time you won't necessarily pass. Part of acepting this path was embracing the idea of being fully, my transwoman self. Because I didn't get to be cis so I got into a more elite sisterhood, and that feels pretty special. A woman by any other name...

https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,86568.msg616649.html#msg616649 :)

(I was 32 when I started transition, and I have had great results.)

Hey and this is the exact thread I was thinking of but couldnt rememeber! you look smashing!!
awesome. im really glad to be able to reread that thread  too it helped give me inspiration, i thought it might be lost in the mists of time!

"I got into a more elite sisterhood, and that feels pretty special."

Right on!

Ladies I started HRT at forty 7or8 or even 9... now just past the Fifty anything point... HRT works, elated  with the results...so no complaints... Just quoting facts and info given to me at the time, but everyone has different results over a different time period. Love to all....

Katy  :-*

Ok,  heres  some  old  school. 
  Years  ago,  the  demographics  of  transitioning  was,  around  45  years  old,  white  middle  class,  median  income,  married  with  kids  in  their  teens, home  owner,  vested  in  a  savings  or  retirement  plan.
that  was  the  'norm'  it  figured,  that  though  aware  of  the  issue,  the  person  had  little  to  no  support  or  information  network.    there was  limited  internet  access,  no  public  acceptance,  so  everyone  was  a  'stand  alone'  for  the  most  part. 
  the  age  factor,  lent  that  finances  were  secured,  homes,  savings  were  there  available  to  leverage,  children  were  of  an  age  that  a  failed  marriage  would  have  minamised  effects. 
the  big  news  on  tg  and  ts  was  the  one  soldier that  went  overseas  as a  male,  and  returned  home  a  female,  the  worlds  first  'front  page  view'  of  a  completed  transition. 
  all  this  set  up,  that  in  the  40's  a  'man',  could  start  transition,  have  the  financial  resources,  be  assured  his  children  were  of  age  to  be  cared  for,  and  perhaps  understand.  additionaly,  that  age  in  life,  still  gave  enough  time  to  'realise  the  dream'    and  live  life  after  transition. 
 
fast  forward  20  years  from  the  mid 1980's  to  the  mid  2000's .

internet  is  in  everones  home.  the  age  of  information  is  in  full  swing.  chat  rooms,  forums,  yahoo  groups,  and nearly  every  medium  has  an  entry  point  into  open  discussion  and  support.  the  younger  generations  embrace  this new  technoligy,  and  discover  through  new  " Google  searches"  that  they  are  not  alone.    Sites  like  susans.org,  urna,  tg  city,  spring  to  live  bring  a  new  internet  community  to  the  tg  scene,  providing  additional  information  and  support.    the Benjamin  Standards  are  opened  to  the  medical  community, and  medacine  has  come  out  of  the  dark  ages.  Jerry  Springer,  Oprah,  Dr  Phil  bring " transgender folk"  into  everyones  home.  feature  movies,  " TransAmerica"  debutes,  we  as  a  community  are  out  of  the  closet.  Doctors  are educated,  surgens  see  oppertunity,  cosmetic  surgery,  now  acceptd  in  main  stream  America  branches  out  into  transition  FFS,  Breast  aug,  etc,  for  transgenders.

The  internet  and  the  media  ride  the  wave,  and   break  down  the  doors  that  were  closed  or  unheard  of  a  few  decades  before.   
  health insurance  companies  that  never  offered  any coverage  for  transitioning,  begin  to  now offer,  in  whole  or  part,  benafits  that  cover  counsling,  hormones  and  gender  reassignment  surgeries. 
countries  like  thailand  see  the  American  clients,  and  promote  their  services,  often  without  the  'red  tape  "requirements,  offering travel  and  surgical  'packages'  at  50%  of  the  cost  elsewhere.   combined with  insurance,  srs/grs  now  becomes  an  affordable  and  accepted  option  for  younger  people.

gender  dysphoria,  modern  day,  seems  to  be  a  growing  movment  to  let  a  child  define  themselves.    the  gender  steriotypes  of  old  are  long  gone.    now,  transition  can  begin  in  grade  school.   horones  are  offered  before  puberty  sets  in  with  their  extreme  hormonal  effects  to  the body .    surgical  options  follow  shortly  there  after. 

  be  it  good,  or  bad,    things  change.   the average ages  still  vary  greatly,  but  as  noted,  gender  dysphoria  often  has  a  delayed  onset,  often  not showing  until  later  in  life.
  where  srs  was  an  option  only  for  perhaps  1 in  100,000  back  25  years  ago,  with  price  tags  of  $25000  or  more  in  a  totaly  self  pay  system,    it  has  opened  up  now,  to  be  available  to  nearly  everyone  that  has  the  true  desire  and  nature  to  persue  it,  with  insurance  and  mandated  health  insurance  behind  them. 
  where  a  time  existed,  where  there  were  a  half  dozen  surgens,  now  the  numbers  seem  limitless.     

these  few  paragraphs  are  by  no  means  scientific  or  medical  facts.  they  represent  my  opinion  and  observations  over  many years  ,  from  my  onset,  through  transition,  and  now,  coasting  down  the  home  stretch,  looking  around  at  the  information  and acceptance  the new  girls  have,  compared  to  the  way  it  was  back  when. 
  im  not  saying  it  is  utopia  acheived,  but  for  sure,  we  as  a  community  have  come  a  long  way.   

As I look back on things, I can see that I sort of went through my identity issues when I was young, but then decided that I was just a heterosexual male with some really strange ideas. I then built an entire life around the notion of trying to be as masculine as possible. For a very long time, there was a considerable inertia behind all that. And that kept me locked into my male life for decades. Only when I faced a personal crisis elsewhere in my life, did I pause long enough to consider who I really was, and what I wanted from life.