Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Male to female transsexual talk (MTF) => Topic started by: StrykerXIII on March 14, 2015, 01:04:14 AM Return to Full Version

Title: Company policy change...
Post by: StrykerXIII on March 14, 2015, 01:04:14 AM
I received a printed copy of an email that has been sent around to all site supervisors today. Company policy regarding appearance is about to change...while I don't remember it word-for-word, it went something like, "exceptions to company appearance and grooming policy will ONLY be made for valid and legally-protected reasons such as religion, medical condition, etc."

I've done my research, and unfortunately, gender identity is NOT protected in Kentucky.

What's a girl to do? If I come out, I risk being fired and left unable to fight it. If I shut my mouth and cut my hair, I'm going to go spiraling right back down the same depressed, borderline suicidal path I took the last time I was forced to cut it.

What are my options? What can I do to maintain the ONE piece of my identity the world hasn't completely robbed me of?
Title: Re: Company policy change...
Post by: Ms Grace on March 14, 2015, 01:25:17 AM
That's a tough one. How about tying the hair back, would that pass? If not, maybe it's time to start looking for a new employer...?
Title: Re: Company policy change...
Post by: StrykerXIII on March 14, 2015, 01:30:41 AM
Quote from: Ms Grace on March 14, 2015, 01:25:17 AM
That's a tough one. How about tying the hair back, would that pass? If not, maybe it's time to start looking for a new employer...?

I know my higher-ups well enough to know that if I ask about that, the very next thing I'm going to hear is, "Why is keeping it long so important to you?"

On the other hand, I did exactly that at work today, and all my boss did was shake his head and chuckle. Maybe that's a sign?

Though now that I think about it...one member of management DID somehow find my facebook page. He's not said a word to me directly, I found out through a former employee who knew about me, but he knows. Makes me wonder who else knows...
Title: Re: Company policy change...
Post by: Cindy on March 14, 2015, 01:37:30 AM
Sorry for my ignorance of USA law, but doesn't Federal anti-discrimination law take precedence?

As you know I'm not in the USA, so sorry if that is a dumb question.
Title: Re: Company policy change...
Post by: StrykerXIII on March 14, 2015, 01:40:27 AM
Quote from: Cindy on March 14, 2015, 01:37:30 AM
Sorry for my ignorance of USA law, but doesn't Federal anti-discrimination law take precedence?

As you know I'm not in the USA, so sorry if that is a dumb question.

That's a good question. Right now, I'm just keeping my fingers crossed that my field manager's knowledge of me being trans will play in my favour. It's had plenty of opportunity to get me fired so far, and I just hit my one-year mark last month. He found out about me about three months after my hire date. Here's praying it stays as-is.
Title: Re: Company policy change...
Post by: Maegan on March 14, 2015, 04:00:32 AM
I suggest just sticking it out and see what happens. It seems to be going okay at this stage. I know it will all work out just okay.  :)
Title: Re: Company policy change...
Post by: suzifrommd on March 14, 2015, 04:53:25 AM
Quote from: StrykerXIII on March 14, 2015, 01:04:14 AM
I've done my research, and unfortunately, gender identity is NOT protected in Kentucky.

The US EEOC has announced that they will treat discrimination based on gender identity the same way they treat any sex discrimination. I.e. their interpretation of Title VII is that gender expression is protected by federal law.

This isn't tested in the courts. No one wants to take on the EEOC, so companies accused of discrimination based on gender expression have all backed down. Unless your employer is especially ornery, I don't imagine they'd want to tangle with Uncle Sam either.

Might be worth letting your management know that you're aware of the EEOC's policy and that you will contact them if your right to express your gender is infringed.

It also might not hurt to educate them about what it means to be transgender. It helped when I explained to my administrators that being trans wasn't something I chose - that we're born that way - and that in all other ways we're normal productive people.

Good luck. Can you tell us what happens?
Title: Re: Company policy change...
Post by: katrinaw on March 14, 2015, 07:09:58 AM
Tricky, feel for you Stryker, I don't understand USA laws either, but the fact that your position is understood by your direct boss it would seem he would give you leeway and a heads up if things were to suddenly deteriorate.

I am sure you will be fine, especially if you nearly meet the rules and are seen to be making the effort  8)

L Katy
Title: Company policy change...
Post by: ImagineKate on March 14, 2015, 07:52:06 AM
Quote from: Cindy on March 14, 2015, 01:37:30 AM
Sorry for my ignorance of USA law, but doesn't Federal anti-discrimination law take precedence?

As you know I'm not in the USA, so sorry if that is a dumb question.
There is no federal law specifically protecting transgender individuals from discrimination. There are state and local anti discrimination laws. Some states like KY have none. Also there has been some interpretation that under the civil rights act that discrimination of transgender people falls under discrimination based on gender but as Suzi said this has not been tested.

ENDA was supposed to fix all of this but it was largely gutted of the trans provisions with congressman Barney frank (who is gay, and a democrat) basically throwing the trans community below the bus.
Title: Re: Company policy change...
Post by: AZKatie on March 14, 2015, 09:38:00 AM
You don't happen to work in Covington, Danville, Frankfort, Lexington-Fayette County, Louisville, Morehead, or Vicco do you?  All those cities have local non-discrimination ordinances that will cover you if you come out.  Otherwise all those federal agencies are great, but you're still unemployed while the lawyers fight it out for years in the courts.

if your immediate boss is ok with the long hair you should be fine on an unofficial capacity since he/she would be the one in charge of policing the policy.  This arrangement only works until a new supervisor shows up and isn't happy with it.  In this case you may be able to throw out the threat of taking it to court for discrimination, but beware that things may turn hostile very quickly if it goes that direction.

I would polish up the resume and keep the feelers out there for another position just in case.  If it's a big company, go talk to the HR department and they should be well versed in the local discrimination laws and be able to tell you what you can do in confidence.

I worked for a Mississippi based company for a little while and there was nothing to protect me from discrimination.  I talked to the HR department and they said I would be fired and there was no recourse.  In a situation like this, your best bet is to find a better environment to work in.

Good luck with it
Title: Re: Company policy change...
Post by: StrykerXIII on March 14, 2015, 12:10:15 PM
Quote from: AZKatie on March 14, 2015, 09:38:00 AM
You don't happen to work in Covington, Danville, Frankfort, Lexington-Fayette County, Louisville, Morehead, or Vicco do you?  All those cities have local non-discrimination ordinances that will cover you if you come out.  Otherwise all those federal agencies are great, but you're still unemployed while the lawyers fight it out for years in the courts.

if your immediate boss is ok with the long hair you should be fine on an unofficial capacity since he/she would be the one in charge of policing the policy.  This arrangement only works until a new supervisor shows up and isn't happy with it.  In this case you may be able to throw out the threat of taking it to court for discrimination, but beware that things may turn hostile very quickly if it goes that direction.

I would polish up the resume and keep the feelers out there for another position just in case.  If it's a big company, go talk to the HR department and they should be well versed in the local discrimination laws and be able to tell you what you can do in confidence.

I worked for a Mississippi based company for a little while and there was nothing to protect me from discrimination.  I talked to the HR department and they said I would be fired and there was no recourse.  In a situation like this, your best bet is to find a better environment to work in.

Good luck with it
I work in Lexington, actually.
Title: Re: Company policy change...
Post by: FTMax on March 14, 2015, 12:32:09 PM
Personally I wouldn't worry about it until someone says something to you. With most employers who are big enough to have written policies, a member of management or human resources would have to give you some kind of verbal counseling before they proceed to any kind of disciplinary action.

Maybe get together whatever medical documents you have (letters from therapists, HRT administration, etc.) and keep them in your car? Print off any local/state laws that would protect your trans status, and make a little packet. If it comes down to it, go to HR and ask for a meeting. I doubt it would come to that though.
Title: Re: Company policy change...
Post by: AZKatie on March 14, 2015, 12:44:38 PM
Quote from: StrykerXIII on March 14, 2015, 12:10:15 PM
I work in Lexington, actually.
If that's the case your life is much easier.  Since there is a local non discrimination law you can keep your hair, and continue as if nothing happened.  If it becomes an issue, take it to HR and tell them that you are trans and its discrimination.  They will confidentially deal with it so no one outside of them and your boss will find out your situation until you are ready to tell them.

:)
Title: Re: Company policy change...
Post by: StrykerXIII on March 14, 2015, 12:52:40 PM
Quote from: ftmax on March 14, 2015, 12:32:09 PM
Personally I wouldn't worry about it until someone says something to you. With most employers who are big enough to have written policies, a member of management or human resources would have to give you some kind of verbal counseling before they proceed to any kind of disciplinary action.

That's exactly what I'm going to wait for. My immediate supervisor is a really chill guy, not much seems to get to him. And the one client employee who complained about my hair last time only even sees me once in a blue moon now, instead of every day like he did before. I've become rather skilled at avoiding him thanks to that last incident. And hey, once I can start pulling it back properly, should someone bring up the "above the collar" bit, I'll just experiment with new styles. I just have to watch it if I put my hair in a bun - a group of currently unnamed, unidentified people has been going around neighbouring cities cutting buns off of anyone they realize to be male.
Title: Re: Company policy change...
Post by: Beth Andrea on March 14, 2015, 12:59:39 PM
Quote from: StrykerXIII on March 14, 2015, 01:04:14 AM
I received a printed copy of an email that has been sent around to all site supervisors today. Company policy regarding appearance is about to change...while I don't remember it word-for-word, it went something like, "exceptions to company appearance and grooming policy will ONLY be made for valid and legally-protected reasons such as religion, medical condition, etc."

I've done my research, and unfortunately, gender identity is NOT protected in Kentucky.

What's a girl to do? If I come out, I risk being fired and left unable to fight it. If I shut my mouth and cut my hair, I'm going to go spiraling right back down the same depressed, borderline suicidal path I took the last time I was forced to cut it.

What are my options? What can I do to maintain the ONE piece of my identity the world hasn't completely robbed me of?

Are you MtF? Transitioning to another gender is a medical reason.
Title: Re: Company policy change...
Post by: StrykerXIII on March 14, 2015, 01:06:33 PM
Quote from: Beth Andrea on March 14, 2015, 12:59:39 PM
Are you MtF? Transitioning to another gender is a medical reason.

I'm not on HRT and have no plans for SRS/GRS/GCS just yet. Trust me, I thought about that.
Title: Re: Company policy change...
Post by: chefskenzie on March 14, 2015, 02:21:27 PM
Federal EEOC will protect you.  Also because you are in a Bible Belt state, if your doctor will write you a note stating that this is a medical necessity, and that you are under treatment for GID, that will usually protect you.

I have a letter that I carry with me 24/7 until my documents are changed that is on my Dr's letterhead and states that I live as a woman full-time, that I am transgender and under his care.  That I have a medical necessity to live and be accepted as a woman, and therefore should be allowed all of the rights and privileges.

This has allowed me to work as Mackenzie even though my legal name isn't that yet.  It has also protected me and allowed me to use the womens restroom, I had someone who knew of me and my past and complained once.  Security was called, I showed them that letter, and they said that they couldn't do anything, and cleared me from any future harrassment.
Title: Re: Company policy change...
Post by: JoanneB on March 14, 2015, 02:33:55 PM
Quote from: Cindy on March 14, 2015, 01:37:30 AM
Sorry for my ignorance of USA law, but doesn't Federal anti-discrimination law take precedence?

As you know I'm not in the USA, so sorry if that is a dumb question.
Only if you work for the gubermint or a company that does business directly with the feds is there trans protections. Otherwise it is a hodgepodge of local, county, and state level laws.

It almost sounds like your employer is at Defcon 1 level for dumping you. Or perhaps some sleaze there. First, make everyone aware of "The Policy". Then, if you are an hourly worker, you MUST receive 3 written warnings, unless it's some grievance offense like hitting your boss over the head with a tire iron. Somehow, even in KY, I don't see your not so long hair being that level of offense. This also just might be legal department fallout from some recent court case against some big department store.

It sounds like you work for some small company, otherwise "The Policy" would have been readily available in the Employee Manual or elsewhere online. In that case they may not have a "Diversity" policy or some other Anti-Discrimination company policy you can point out.
Title: Re: Company policy change...
Post by: Blush on March 14, 2015, 02:37:27 PM
My thoughts are that unless you're disturbing clients or coworkers there won't be a problem. Don't let your medical conditions or needs define you - you're a person regardless of gender or whatever else! Work with your employers and empathize with them, help them to help you! Help them see you for your values, merits, and what you bring to the table as their employee, not your clothes or hair styles. Due to the nature of transitioning, we may feel the world has us under a magnifying glass, when really people are worried about millions of other things! Also, federal and state laws don't always take presidency of what companies want to achieve! You may find your company has it's own set of rules concerning non-discriminatory employment to compete with most of the other companies out there in the world today. Say they did have a problem - is that really the type of company you'd take pride in working for and representing? Good luck and keep your head high!
Title: Re: Company policy change...
Post by: ImagineKate on March 14, 2015, 07:22:09 PM

Quote from: StrykerXIII on March 14, 2015, 01:06:33 PM
I'm not on HRT and have no plans for SRS/GRS/GCS just yet. Trust me, I thought about that.

You're seeing a therapist? See one. Get it on paper to CYA.
Title: Re: Company policy change...
Post by: AbbyKat on March 14, 2015, 08:12:51 PM
Stryker, since your field boss knows, why don't you question him about it?  Just ask him "Does this new policy put my job at risk or should I not worry about this?"

Whatever his answer is, it's nice to have some warning so you can look for a company a bit more enlightened to work for.
Title: Re: Company policy change...
Post by: StrykerXIII on March 15, 2015, 02:11:24 AM
Quote from: Abysha on March 14, 2015, 08:12:51 PM
Stryker, since your field boss knows, why don't you question him about it?  Just ask him "Does this new policy put my job at risk or should I not worry about this?"

Whatever his answer is, it's nice to have some warning so you can look for a company a bit more enlightened to work for.

I'm never really able to drive out to the main office. I'm already driving 35 miles one-way to get to work, and the office is even further from home than that. With what little I bring home each pay period, I never really have the gas to make the extra trips, because if I do, I won't have enough gas to finish out the upcoming work week. And I haven't really got the nerve to, either. I'm terrified by the thought of being fired, because if I'm unemployed for just one pay period, just two lousy weeks, I lose everything. House, car, all of it. I'm THAT financially strapped.