Susan's Place Transgender Resources

I'm 48 years old, married and I am a woman inside trapped in a males body, I'm also in the closet hiding. and im shy and introverted and scared. there is no doubt in my mind on my internal femininity. its like a light bulb turned on, that now explains everything about my life to this point, everything is in focus, yet now I'm aware of pain there i have been carrying for decades.

in secret i have an hrt appointment in two weeks.

I'm pretty fit, and i did my make up fully the other day (in secret) and i thought i looked well good.

what can i expect from my hrt? how feminine will it be for someone my age?
any success stories, pictures of folks my age group?

I started at 47 myself and that avatar really is me now. It can work wonders for some. :)

I started close to 50.

I have some facial feminization. The reduction of dysphoria and other wonderful benefits of being on the right hormones has a lot of benefits in an of itself.

Do not be afraid. If you can try to get a gender therapist to help you through the tough times it may be well worth the effort.

HRT works wonders at any age.  It is a slow process.  You will not get results over night.  But I think I can say that you will get a peaceful feeling and see internal differences after a few weeks.

Let us know how your first appointment goes!

It varies from person to person. In general though it may take longer at your age but changes will happen. I'm in my 40's and it's all happening now after a slow start. It's not too late at all! You have every chance of a successful transition.

OMG I get excited at these encouraging words! Thank you for the encouragement.

Does anyone know if I will I get the hormones same day? they said appointment will be about 30 minutes, that seems pretty quick.  I am hoping to start them on that day....

It depends on where you live and if they do informed consent, or if you have seen a therapist. You will likely have blood work your first day. some places wait for those results before giving scripts. but each place is different.

Most likely not on the first apt but that may depend on where you are. The only other point is should add is don't get discouraged if initially progress seems minimal or slow. It will happen just give it time.

I'm west cost, great north west, its informed consent (or so is my understanding)

Depends on the doc/endo - you may need a blood test first depending on your health, weight, family health history etc.

I started at 47, BTW.

thank you for the shares and open-ness, wish I had come here sooner (been all over the net and ->-bleeped-<- too)

I am 51 and started full time hrt 10 months ago ( I used hrt off and on during the 10 years I was married, with some minimal breast growth). Over the years I have noticed some decrease in the size of my genitals, which is welcome. In the last 10 months I have had 2" of bust growth and now am close to a B cup. As others have mentioned, I feel much more at peace now and my general mood is now one of happiness. I have been seeing a gender therapist for many years now and I have been undergoing laser hair removal and have scheduled a consultation for FFS. I am not full time yet. Good luck and all the best.

thanks for the shares, if you don't mind me asking about the laser, I have an appointment for next week, I have some gray, which they say they can't get. what do you do in this case? electrolosis? shave?

With you on the grey hair. Best advice I can give is do 3 treatments and see how your greys do react. Going for my 4th soon but last treatment I had some the did actually get effected and I am also trying a spray that may help the laser sap the buggers. One other note is you skin color makes a big difference if more on the white side the better. If the hair is finer its also harder for laser to work. Myself I hope laser does the job since doesn't seem to be much for electro in my part of the world. You said great north and west maybe close I live in alberta, Canada and it appears there are some electro but not a lot but first give laser a try at least it is less painful from what I have heard and makes the electro easier too. If only we could transplant what hair we don't want and what we don't have well I would be in great shape well on that front.

Good luck and one thing I have also learned after you have your laser done exfoliate it will help a lot.

43 btw

I'm not really in your age group, but I think it's never too late to be yourself, and you know 50 is the new 40 or even 30 for some women. Still you should probably try and make realistic expectations and probably not be too secretive with your spouse, or at least try drop some hints at first, I don't know if she would be happy knowing that you were already on hrt without telling her something. At least, me personally I would not take it well, but every person is different, just try to be comfortable to that it will show.

Good luck

I did 3 laser treatments (3 months, 1/month) and am now doing electrolysis (weekly).

The best advise I can give you about the beard is start now. Make a commitment and budget funds.

Electrolysis for me will take 150 hours, my estimate. At 1.5 hours a week it is 100 weeks !!!

I have another question for everyone, so.. does HRT, affect Laser? I mean if I start on my MTF hormones will it slow down my hair growth on my face, and thus slow down how long it takes for laser to get all the hair? also you can stain the hair? that makes sense if it works :) would help the laser zero in (in theory anyway, right?).

guess I need to go read more on this stuff :D

and I agree with Serena, I need to come out to my wife in a final way sooner than later. I plan to do it very soon by reading her a letter I have been writing her (for a while now).

Here is my experience with laser, gray hair and HRT.

HRT did turn some of my facial hair white. I had a mixture black (65%), dark grey(20%), red(5%) and white hair(10%). Laser did nothing to red and white hair. It did weaken most of the dark gray hair (according to my electrologist since I was doing both at the same time, laser in dark, electrolysis on light hair.) After laser, the dark gray hair was thinner and she had to use less power so I see it as a plus.

As for staining hair like hair coloring does not work that is just surface color.
The laser needs to hit the lower hair under the skin so if it is an option then it needs to be a special dye that hits below the surface and good news there are some albeit not cheap. From what I understand it will help but will not get them all so like Sydney said red and white hairs electro is the only option. Basic difference between the 2 is laser is light that hits the follicle and electrolysis is a needle that targets each hair. I don't know what electro is first hand so cant judge that either and a warning it wont be a walk in the park but once its done it will help a lot:)

I'm a bit older and have a very salt and pepper beard.  I have opted to not even try the laser removal and have gone right into electrolysis.  It is the best method for a complete kill off. I did 2 hours right after I started HRT and it didn't bother me in the least. I am going Sunday for a 6 hour session with 2 techs so I will see what that feels like.

Just remember that -

You're never to old to become the person you are..... 

I started HRT at 46 and have been on a Spironolactone/Estradiol regimen for 13 months. I am very pleased with the results thus far, I am currently a 38 C or D (I've been measured more than once and gotten different results). I have lost 6 inches in my waist and gained 4 inches in my hips. I haven't done any laser or electrolysis yet because I simply did not have the money. I've been lucky that my facial hair was light blonde/grey and never did grow that quickly. I can shave in the morning and not have any visible shadow in the evening.

In other words, it s never too late.

Thanks for the share, I'm gonna try laser, most my facial hair is dark, but starting to get gray/white in there. will give laser a shot, and then likely circle back to electrollisis for the rest.

Thanks above for the shares about your measurements, I'd love to have some hips finally. Will HRT cause bone structural changes? will my hips widen? I don't think it does at my age, and I have to rely on fat reallocations, or maybe a corset type thing. (darn it!)

43 here and wondering what HRT will do to me.  I'm
Hoping to start early May. My bloodwork is done so all I'm waiting on is the golden ticket from my therapist. 

Crud on the laser.  I had a beard for 21 years and there's a mixture of dark and grey/hair.  It grows faster than I thought.  I went from 22 to 43 and never shaved it off so this is all new to me. 

38D?!? Dayum!!!  Dr. asked me if my mom was large chested and i couldn't even think about it without flinching uncontrollably.   I don't plan on going full time so my luck I'll end up with a rack.

Anxiously waiting. 

I'm 44 now. I've been on real HRT for almost a year now. Started with pills and moved to injections 4 months later. I am completely happy with my results so far. I didnt think that I would change too much at all. But here are the before/after pics;

before;
(https://farm9.staticflickr.com/8591/16387435060_ed625c3c0a_o.jpg)

most recent, from a couple of weeks ago or so.
(https://farm8.staticflickr.com/7330/16547420396_f28700464e_b.jpg)

For you Megan   :icon_hug:,

I started my transition at age 62, nine months later and now 63, here I am  ;D.  I've been through many changes, physical, mental, and emotional, and with each change I am able to come through stronger, more confident, and able to confront the next situation.

There are MANY great people here that will go 'far' out of their way to help any way they can.

I do have some pics posted and I could not remember where they were so I checked to save you some time, here is where they are:  MTF -   The All New Before & After Topic  page 56   and in General -  Show Yourself  page 68

Stay strong and when not.....come here, this is where the help is.   Dani

Started at 49... Never looked back, love the changes (some could be more prominent) but the calmness, confidence and obvious changes are ... The best  >:-)

L Katy :-*

Quote from: michelle666 on March 21, 2015, 10:42:30 AM
I'm 44 now. I've been on real HRT for almost a year now. Started with pills and moved to injections 4 months later. I am completely happy with my results so far. I didnt think that I would change too much at all. But here are the before/after pics;

before;
(https://farm9.staticflickr.com/8591/16387435060_ed625c3c0a_o.jpg)

most recent, from a couple of weeks ago or so.
(https://farm8.staticflickr.com/7330/16547420396_f28700464e_b.jpg)

Wow.  You look great.  I'd love to see more of you.  I'll eventually be starting at the same age you did. 

You all look great! now if i can only find the strength, to come out to my SO. I'm so afraid of losing her.

Hi Megan,
I was in the same boat as you back in October 2014. It's when I came out to my Wife and myself really. I was 47. Since October I have started with a Gender Therapist and I can not stress this enough that they are a HUGE help in self discovery, well the discovery part is really up to you as only you can really know. The therapist will help you on the right path to Assist you, keyword: Assist.
You have Final decisions in all aspects of Transition. :)

Anyway, My Wife is ok with it, remember not to force anything onto her too fast. I made that mistake and we had arguments. We decided to take each day as it comes. If you or her feel like you are pushing matters (Transition) and it may happen because we sooo want to let the world know, don't! Just talk about it, ask how she feels and go from there.

On Xmas I came out to my family. That was nerve wreaking. Talk about Anxiety attacks, lol. Well to keep it short.....My Family supports me 100%...My Sister like 10000% HAHA. She loves it. My neighbor friend knows, and family friends know.
When my Family visited me on Feb 20th I presented Female, My Mom was estatic, My Step-father said "Oh ->-bleeped-<-" with a smile and my sister just wanted to show me off. Well, not much to show as I still am Pre-Everything! grrr

And talking about Pre-everything...I finally have my first Endo visit on May 13th. I am 48 yrs old as of January and so much looking forward to it. The Doctor treating me called me and told me the Bloodwork and results will be the same day while I am there, and also within the 30 min between Nurse appointment and Doctor appointment.

I expected to be on Hormones back in Jan already but it looks like May/June now. Am I a little frustrated? I was because like many, I wanted the most important thing to start..Hormones. Then again as I look back, the most important thing is being content with yourself. The support from Family, the understanding of a journey I have just begun was and still is THE Most important aspect.
The road ahead is still long with many bumps, curves and Stop signs, but if I don't rush it, let it happen as the days come and go, I think it will be a much easier path.

So, as I see your situation, I see a mirror image of mine when I started. Yes, we are different people but if you take your time, put one foot in front of the other as you go down your chosen path, I see success. :)

You are not alone.  :)

*hugs*

Jessika

For me the improved mood from HRT alone has been worth it. Yes I'm hoping to be pretty and hit on by guys (that I'll reject since I like girls), but in the last couple of weeks my mood has really improved a great deal.

Started at 44 and approaching male fail rapidly but my circumstances are a wee bit different being that I'm intersex. Still I'm having very dramatic results.

Michelle you look great. You look so tough before and amazing after. You give a girl hope