Community Conversation => Transgender talk => Topic started by: MugwortPsychonaut on March 31, 2015, 05:42:53 PM Return to Full Version
Title: The sweetest reason for being misgendered
Post by: MugwortPsychonaut on March 31, 2015, 05:42:53 PM
Post by: MugwortPsychonaut on March 31, 2015, 05:42:53 PM
I love my job. I don't get paid, as it's a volunteer job, but I love it. If I were a gazillionaire, I would still work there.
It's a very, very, very queer-friendly place. When I started working there, I was also just about to start spiro and presenting as female out-and-about. So for the first couple weeks I came to work as male, and shortly after as female sometimes, and shortly after that, as female all the time.
One of my bosses has had a hard time with the name and pronoun switch. Sometimes he calls me by my boy name, and he usually uses male pronouns. For a little while I was irked by it, but I brushed it off. He eventually got better with the name but not with the pronouns.
A couple weeks ago, said boss referred to me as "he." My response is typically... it's so hard to express something as subtle as tone over the internet... I'll say "he?" in sort of a playfully confused way. He apologized and said the sweetest damn thing ever, and I paraphrase:
That seriously warmed my heart and put a big smile on my face. I love my fake job!
It's a very, very, very queer-friendly place. When I started working there, I was also just about to start spiro and presenting as female out-and-about. So for the first couple weeks I came to work as male, and shortly after as female sometimes, and shortly after that, as female all the time.
One of my bosses has had a hard time with the name and pronoun switch. Sometimes he calls me by my boy name, and he usually uses male pronouns. For a little while I was irked by it, but I brushed it off. He eventually got better with the name but not with the pronouns.
A couple weeks ago, said boss referred to me as "he." My response is typically... it's so hard to express something as subtle as tone over the internet... I'll say "he?" in sort of a playfully confused way. He apologized and said the sweetest damn thing ever, and I paraphrase:
QuoteI'm sorry. You know why I do that? Cause when you started, you were [boy name]. And I was like, 'Wow! [boy name] is a solid guy! I like [boy name]!' And then right after, you came in as [girl name], and I was like, BZZZT! So I apologize, and I'm doing my best.
That seriously warmed my heart and put a big smile on my face. I love my fake job!
Title: Re: The sweetest reason for being misgendered
Post by: Cindy on March 31, 2015, 05:46:19 PM
Post by: Cindy on March 31, 2015, 05:46:19 PM
That sounds like a big win!
He sounds a genuine guy who is very supportive.
And big + for being a volunteer, you are an awesome young lady!
He sounds a genuine guy who is very supportive.
And big + for being a volunteer, you are an awesome young lady!
Title: Re: The sweetest reason for being misgendered
Post by: Ms Grace on March 31, 2015, 06:03:25 PM
Post by: Ms Grace on March 31, 2015, 06:03:25 PM
My usual response to my old name and misgenderings at work was "who"? They got the message pretty quickly... ::)
It's nice he thinks your solid but I sure hope he starts thinking "girl name is solid" too!
It's nice he thinks your solid but I sure hope he starts thinking "girl name is solid" too!
Title: Re: The sweetest reason for being misgendered
Post by: Rachel on March 31, 2015, 08:06:20 PM
Post by: Rachel on March 31, 2015, 08:06:20 PM
I think he is trying to get it and you eased the conversation well.
Title: Re: The sweetest reason for being misgendered
Post by: fifi000 on March 31, 2015, 09:46:44 PM
Post by: fifi000 on March 31, 2015, 09:46:44 PM
Just to have support and acceptance.. Oh wow.. =)
Especially for your boss to even explain how they saw you before (all in good light) and to embrace your transition and what seems to be the same respect..
Sure takes time, but yea, your boss.. Mas bueno!
Glad for you!!! :angel:
Especially for your boss to even explain how they saw you before (all in good light) and to embrace your transition and what seems to be the same respect..
Sure takes time, but yea, your boss.. Mas bueno!
Glad for you!!! :angel:
Title: Re: The sweetest reason for being misgendered
Post by: Aazhie on April 01, 2015, 01:36:01 AM
Post by: Aazhie on April 01, 2015, 01:36:01 AM
awww, that's cool. I am terrible at blurting stuff out, pronouns/names can be included sometimes, so I can see things from your boss's view too. :'(