General Discussions => General discussions => ARGHHH! => Topic started by: 1984 on April 08, 2015, 09:14:50 PM Return to Full Version

Title: Friend?
Post by: 1984 on April 08, 2015, 09:14:50 PM
I came out to a friend last year and she seemed to be OK with me being transgender. Actually she had discovered it by herself and I just agreed. By that time, she even tried to use the right pronouns. Some months later she started to make fun of me and call other friends to ridicule me. I got really angry and we had a lot of arguments. I'm tired of receiving messages in my cellphone of stupid teenagers treating me as an abomination. Now she says "trying to be transgender is wrong" and "you'll never be a real man". When I asked her to use masculine pronouns again, she just said that I was being futile and a bad friend, because I should respect her "need" to treat me in the feminine, since I "don't have the right genitalia to be called a man". She started misgendering me on purpose and we had a really big argue. Now I'm just angry as hell and maybe writing this is a good way for me to calm down.
I still don't get her subtle change. Maybe she was pretending she accepted me before?
Title: Re: Friend?
Post by: Jill F on April 08, 2015, 09:22:18 PM
A true friend would not treat you that way.  Life is far too short to waste it with people who don't respect you.

I wouldn't burn the bridge, but it's probably time to tell her that you're parting ways until she can pull her head out of her sphincter.
Title: Re: Friend?
Post by: Tysilio on April 08, 2015, 10:36:20 PM
Quote...tell her that you're parting ways until she can pull her head out of her sphincter.

Nicely phrased, Ms. F.  And quite right.
Title: Re: Friend?
Post by: Ms Grace on April 08, 2015, 11:23:49 PM
Time for a new friend...
Title: Re: Friend?
Post by: Arch on April 08, 2015, 11:26:55 PM
You can always start calling her "Fred" and "he." And when she objects, tell her that she looks like a Fred...and that since she keeps misgendering you, you're going to do the same to her.

But seriously, she doesn't sound like a friend. At least, not anymore. You deserve better.
Title: Re: Friend?
Post by: suzifrommd on April 09, 2015, 06:53:40 AM
Please don't allow her to live "rent free" in your head. She's an insensitive person and doesn't deserve any more of your consideration. Consider yourself lucky she showed her true colors.
Title: Re: Friend?
Post by: King Malachite on April 09, 2015, 12:38:27 PM
It is time for you to drop her like a hot potato.  I wouldn't even tell her.  If she is your friend, she will contact you and ask what is up.  If not, then you don't need her in your life.
Title: Re: Friend?
Post by: yurihime on April 09, 2015, 12:58:51 PM
Wow what a terrible person.. I wonder what made her go from understanding to such a mean person. I find it strange how she made a complete 180. I honestly wouldn't associate with her anymore, I rather stick to having no friends than being with that jerk.

There are so many things that could have made her change, her friends, religion, etc.. However it doesn't matter and her actions a just unreasonable.

You definitely don't need her. That's for sure!
Title: Re: Friend?
Post by: FTMax on April 09, 2015, 05:19:31 PM
She definitely doesn't deserve a chance, and personally I wouldn't even give her an explanation. I'd cut her out of my life immediately - delete her contact info, block her number, unfriend, etc. Block all the numbers that people text or call you from.

I'd rather have no friends than bad friends.