General Discussions => General discussions => Topic started by: Cindy on May 15, 2015, 07:22:16 AM Return to Full Version
Title: The epidemic of domestic violence
Post by: Cindy on May 15, 2015, 07:22:16 AM
Post by: Cindy on May 15, 2015, 07:22:16 AM
In Australia two cis women a week are killed by their partner. In the USA it is probably higher.
Transwomen and men suffer violence each day, but we rarely talk about domestic violence.
It is time we did.
How many of us suffer from this?
How and what form?
How did you deal with it?
Let's talk.
I will clarify, I do not personally suffer from this, but I want to know how my sisters and brothers do.
Transwomen and men suffer violence each day, but we rarely talk about domestic violence.
It is time we did.
How many of us suffer from this?
How and what form?
How did you deal with it?
Let's talk.
I will clarify, I do not personally suffer from this, but I want to know how my sisters and brothers do.
Title: Re: The epidemic of domestic violence
Post by: Dee Marshall on May 15, 2015, 09:25:41 AM
Post by: Dee Marshall on May 15, 2015, 09:25:41 AM
I did, years ago. Sweetie had a horrible temper. To her punching me was "OK, cause" I'm "a guy and" she's "a girl." She would throw things and there would be verbal abuse. Not making excuses, but it turned out she had "benign" growths on her uterus that played heck with her hormones. After she had a hysterectomy she calmed down quite a bit. She still has some verbal habits, but I call her on them and she stops (or stops talking to me for a while). I can tell that she's ashamed of the behavior because of how she treats me after although she rarely apologizes. Before I knew I was trans I put up with it because I didn't feel like a man, I was ashamed of myself and didn't know why. Things I've read here make me think a lot of us are like that.
Now I know I'm a woman, I don't feel ashamed and I stand up for myself more. Even with all the problems and adjustments and dangers I know TG has been good for me.
Part of it was the way we both grew up. Her parents had no compunction against being angry and raising their voices to each other or even being unreasonable. My parents had a rule that they never fought in front of us. I don't think either scheme was good, but her family's granted her an arsenal to use in an argument and mine left me defenseless.
Now I know I'm a woman, I don't feel ashamed and I stand up for myself more. Even with all the problems and adjustments and dangers I know TG has been good for me.
Part of it was the way we both grew up. Her parents had no compunction against being angry and raising their voices to each other or even being unreasonable. My parents had a rule that they never fought in front of us. I don't think either scheme was good, but her family's granted her an arsenal to use in an argument and mine left me defenseless.
Title: Re: The epidemic of domestic violence
Post by: ChiGirl on May 15, 2015, 09:43:34 AM
Post by: ChiGirl on May 15, 2015, 09:43:34 AM
Wow, sounds a lot like my wife. Less physical abuse and more emotional. She too has benign cysts on her ovaries. She should have had a hysterectomy 4 years ago, but she refused because, "She couldn't do that to our daughter." WTF? She's generally a nightmare to deal with and blames everything on either other people or her hormones.
Good luck & hugs!
Good luck & hugs!
Title: Re: The epidemic of domestic violence
Post by: Dee Marshall on May 15, 2015, 11:21:47 AM
Post by: Dee Marshall on May 15, 2015, 11:21:47 AM
Thank you. I truly believe she has more testosterone in her system than I ever did. Her hair's been thin for a long time, for one thing. We're good these days except for the obvious adjustments and her insecurity. All we have now are lingering ghosts of behaviors we still have to chase off from time to time.