Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Hello hello!

So I met a girl and broke my 6 year romantic hiatus (finally!). Last night we went out and bought a strap on. In my past experiences with using one i always have found the transistion from bare to strapon is quite awkward and moment killing.

Does anyone have any advice on how to make it less awkward?

Well you could tell her to play with her boobies and watch while you take it on...

and you could take it on and off beforehand a few times so that you are trained...


hugs

Well, first of all, congrats. You've taken a good step forward.

I agree with the advice above about practicing. You could practice so that you're familiar with taking it off and on so that when the moment comes you won't be fiddling around with equipment for too long. It'll be less of a mood-killer if it doesn't take as much time.

Good luck.

Once you're skilled enough you can do some foreplay (use your imagination) as you put it on.

I've just maintained conversation while strapping up and doing a little victory dance when I feel it's secure. Which ends up being hilarious, because, well...the toy does a thing and any awkwardness probably would get overshadowed by it.

I honestly don't think that there's any way to smoothly put a strap-on on without having a slight intermission.  Like others have suggested, making conversation or having her play with her body are some things you can try. 

But I suppose just remember that there are those awkward pauses for cis-guys, too, when they put on a condom.

I try to predict nookie night and pack with my cock beforehand as to avoid that "pause".  Doesn't always work!

You could have her put it on you, then reward her...
Unless it requires a complex system of pulleys and levers, I don't see why it couldn't be incorporated into the foreplay. I guess if you have some dysphoric stuff to do with her seeing you while not entirely strapped, then you could excuse yourself and prep in the privacy of the bathroom. Prefaced of course by saying, "Wait a moment while I slip into something more 'comfortable.'"

     Hugs,
- Katie
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Like Kreuzfidel, I try to plan ahead and hard pack with the strap loosened.

If not, I already have the cock and strap set up so that I only have to step into the restroom and be out and back into the bed within a few moments.  Yes...I tell her to keep herself wanting while I am gone... ;)

Generally, my partner (past/present) does not see that area of my body unless there is a cock attached to it.

My partner is into bondage, so I like to work it in. Either blindfold him and then get ready, or tie him up and then leave the room. Either way creates some suspense for him of not knowing what's next and buys me some time.

I also like to leave one side of the harness buckled so it's faster. It cuts the time by much more than half because you don't have to fiddle or lose straps.

idk how you feel about feeldoes, but they're a really interesting alternative to strapons (and might be easier to slip on/downside is that they aren't as stable as a strapon on a harness)

Obfuskatie,  I would not want for her to see me put mine on as that just add  to my dysphoric of needing it in the first place. I want it to be behind the seen as much as possible. 

Ever,  feeldoes are not stable enough to be realistic from my point of view.

Quote from: mm on May 26, 2015, 11:47:09 AM

Ever,  feeldoes are not stable enough to be realistic from my point of view.

Some people use feeldoes either with panties or with a harness.
All at your own risk :) .

On a side note, you might look into rodeoh style harnesses...

My GF and I generally talk whilst I attempt to put on the harness, usually making little jokes rather than dirty talk or anything like that, then again we're both really laid back people and it's hard for either of us to "spoil the mood", so it small chatting might not work for everyone.

Also whilst trying to put on the harness my GF will generally pick out what... er, attachment she wants me to put on, but this also requires having more than a few things that go on it. It helps to kill a bit of time whilst fiddling with all the straps and such.

What I sometimes do is get it on ahead of time if I'm aware sexytimes are on the near horizon.  If I'm planning on having sex, being hard in advance isn't that weird to me so I'll just slip into the bathroom or room before my SO gets there and apply my manbits.  Alternately if you have enough practice to put it on while otherwise distracted, you could be performing foreplay at the same time(use your *rainbows overhead* imagination!).

You could also simply have it as part of your regular 'getting prepared' routine.  You put on your gear while she gets out lube/condoms/etc so that you're both equally distracted with mundane tasks before getting your freak on.

Sorry for the weirdness.  It's 4am and I don't usually get insomnia.

one suggestion I'd have is to excuse yourself to ensure everything is clean and come back with it. My girlfriend always freshens up before we're intimate and I do the same although I don't use a strapon.

I like wearing Rodeoh underwear that has a built-in pocket for your dick. It feels more natural than wearing a harness.

Thanks guys!  I appreciate the advice.  It didn't go too awkwardly.. just sorted scooted off to the side for a moment.  I think incorporating it into foreplay would be a fairly decent option in the future though. 

Glad it went well!

I usually tell my wife that i'm gonna go get handsome, and i'll put on the strap-on out of her sight, then come back and make her to put a condom on it... never gets awkward and works every time!  hope this helps.