Susan's Place Transgender Resources

This trip was something I had been looking forward to ever since the appointment was scheduled for something I have need dealing with all my life. I can't say would ever recommend doing it by bus and I wouldn't  recommend it. Regardless of that experience when I go for the procedure next year is by plane all the way. The trip to the Phoenix area took around 43 hours. Slightly longer than planned because the driver didn't know how to get to the station once we made it took Phoenix. The worst part of it other than the long periods of time on a bus and the 5 hour plus layover in Portland was the bathroom on the bus. Nothing worse than having to sit on toilet that guys haven't had the self respect to put the lid up use and put the seat back down. Instead getting the seat and everything else covered. Considering the amount of liquid I drink and being stuck on a bus well you can imagine I couldn't avoid using it. Between hovering over it on some of the buses and alcohol wipes to sanitize the seat helped deal with it once the bathroom became disgusting.

Which brings me to the next thing I won't do again either. Going to the zoo without going to the hotel first. I had decided before leaving that if I made it so I was more mobile that I could go to the zoo first. In theory a great idea, but in practice not so much. I would have stayed at the zoo longer but a heavy backpack gets tiring after awhile especially for your my sore shoulders. I enjoyed being able to take my mom and brother to the zoo. As some may recall Arizona is one of the states that tried to pass a bathroom bill. I should have taken a picture of the stupid sign outside the main bathrooms at the zoo, but I didn't since I really didn't want to draw unwanted attention to myself. Which brings me to what happened shortly after eating lunch. My mom likes having her hair cut super short and in fact so short some wouldn't know she is a woman. The fact she is in a wheelchair among a few things results in things not being defined as much. The result was when I went to take her to the family restroom which I chose to do because often I can pivot transfer in those bathrooms with her where as in a regular stall you often have walk her a short distance. I could over hear them telling the persons that wanted to used it next that they male was in using it. My first assumption was that I had been read, but in fact I hadn't. My mom had been read as a male. This fact hadn't dawned on me, not that it really mattered, tell the other day when I was on the buses where I live without her which isn't normally the case. One person who has seen us many times asked where my father that I normally bring with me was at. I had to kindly correct them and that person wasn't the only one who had made that same assumption about her and brought it up that day. The combination of my shoulders getting really sore and the fact it was getting late resulted in us not spending as much time at the zoo as I would have liked. At one point I wasn't going to go see one of the animals and then changed my mind. To be honest, I'm glad I did. I have never seen an exhibit done this way for them, but they seemed completely at home in it.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi47.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Ff198%2FMariah_Shaw%2FFacebook%2FPhoenix%2520zoo%2F11036447_478400308995707_4470351992766293607_n_zpseyqmf7bc.jpg&hash=5993a9177a60b5cf48cc365f8012ccce1722f7ad)


Now the day of the consul I had to get up early thanks to needing to deal with something in regards to my mom and getting ready for my appointment with Dr. Meltzer. The plan was for me to travel by local bus to get there. Great plan in theory, but yet again issues occurred. The bus on the street that his office is on broke down more than once. As a result I had to call and say I was going to be a few minutes late which they had no issue with. I got to the building and then remembered that I didn't take the time to remember which suite they were in and as a result had to call them and ask for directions. This was the first office I have been to that I recall having to have them unlock the door for you to get in, but someone happened be going out as I was coming in so they didn't have to buzz me in. I waited probably about half an hour before being taken back and seen by the nurse who asked some questions and went over my medical history. Then a short time later met with Meltzer and he eventually examined the area and confirmed what I already knew to be the case. The penis is to small, but luckily enough skin is on the scrotum that we shouldn't need donor skin from anywhere else on my body which was a relief to me because I had assumed all along that donor skin would be needed in my case.

As much as I wanted to go eat at different places and do different things I just didn't have the time and was worn out from that long trip. We were suppose to end up on a bus at 1:40am in the morning to return home. The bus was first late coming from El Paso and then when he arrived he didn't load us first which was supposed to happen due to her wheelchair. So by the time he got to us he was trying to force her to have to walk. He didn't like my response and my brother who raised his voice so he refused and we had to be scheduled for another bus. Now the fact I hadn't slept in over 24 hours coupled with the stress of dealing with what just happened along with keeping them in check resulted my having a seizure shortly after 6am in the morning. I hadn't a seizure in over 2 and half years at that point. So much to the point that he was ready to start the removal of the seizure medication, but was willing to wait tell after SRS per my request. Needless to say I won't be off of it that quickly, if ever. The paramedics were called and I was awake before they arrived. I was able to answer their questions despite getting the day of the week wrong. I said Friday instead of Thursday. Anyway I trip wasn't warranted since we knew the cause and the fact I'm already being treated for seizures. Which reminds me of another point. I let the cat out of the bag with the manager who was on when the bus situation occurred. She was right shaving the hairs you basically can't see on my face in the woman's bathroom was a non issue. No cared one bit and for that matter I had done the same on the buses and no one really payed any attention. I was concerned about both and it wasn't a problem which was a pleasant relief. Now the trip back wasn't to bad except for one moment and that occurred probably about an hour away from Portland, Oregon. There was a gentleman that had went and used the bathroom and on his way back decided my hair was something to touch and massage. I don't know what he was thinking over if it was purely and accident. Frankly, I don't care either way. When we arrived in Portland, the next bus was willing to load us early, but asked if we wanted to use the station. I had explain both the seizure on Thursday and what happened and since my mom didn't need to use the bathroom we opted to get on the bus. Now since we had to go into the bus terminal to do so I had to pass the guy who played with my hair. I made parting comment in his direction in regards to it and he didn't say a word. Other than being stuck for about 4 hours a truck stop for the final bus everything else went off fine. Anyway and that is it.
Mariah

Quite a trip and so far the zoo sounded like the better part of your eventful journey.  Glad you are back safely and wonder if your SRS ticker needs updating?  Your mom's situation with being mis-gendered reminds us that it happens to cis people too.  After all that it does seem your better option is flying  ;D

I would make a stink if anyone sexually harassed me in that manner. I don't like being touched involuntarily by anyone.

I agree with you about flying. Flying is awful sometimes but not as bad as 40 hours on a bus.

Good luck I hope your GRS prep goes well

Thank Tessa. I hope it goes well too. Insurance and how far he is booked out is why the ticker is set to 10/27/2016. Those people going to see him now on the most part are getting scheduled for 2017 now because he is booked out that far. The insurance set the date up before the consult. I waited to share the exact date tell after the consult in case it was changed for any reason. The consult and zoo were the better parts of the journey for sure. Yep, it sure does and that is one of two reasons I shared that fact. One because CIS people get misgendered and to our first assumptions that we were one's they clocked isn't always right. 40 plus hours on buses wouldn't work and considering he conditions of the bathroom even less so. It would be like asking for an infection. Hugs
Mariah

Quote from: Tessa James on June 02, 2015, 03:05:22 AM
Quite a trip and so far the zoo sounded like the better part of your eventful journey.  Glad you are back safely and wonder if your SRS ticker needs updating?  Your mom's situation with being mis-gendered reminds us that it happens to cis people too.  After all that it does seem your better option is flying  ;D

Thanks iKate. As much as I was told I should get it wrote up I knew it would mean staying in Portland longer and I frankly just wanted to get home and rest from the long journey. I hated being touched by him too. Yep and when I do that will be a first which reminds me leaving the Northwest was a first for me as it was. I hadn't been further south than Grants Pass, Oregon before that week. Hugs
Mariah

Quote from: iKate on June 02, 2015, 03:28:49 AM
I would make a stink if anyone sexually harassed me in that manner. I don't like being touched involuntarily by anyone.

I agree with you about flying. Flying is awful sometimes but not as bad as 40 hours on a bus.

Good luck I hope your GRS prep goes well

Yes I recall the situation so well, it still saddens me that you were all treated that way at Phoenix.... hugs

The fact that you were 2.5 years clear of seizures, that were then brought back primarily with the stress at the Phoenix bus station is disappointing too, I hope now that you'll get back on the long term with out seizure track again.

But so glad the consult went well for you and that you had a nice day at the zoo... monkey looks happy too!

L Katy  :-*

Sounds like quite the dramatic trip - I hope the seizures aren't something you need to continue worrying about...??

As for going on long bus trips, they may be cheaper but they sure are stressful.

The funny thing is the driver of the first bus leaving Phoenix and the guy on the bus going back to Portland were the worst parts of the bus experience besides the bathroom. I hope so too. Yep, the monkey does seem very happy. You have to wash your hands upon entering and leaving the exhibit and stay so far from them, but otherwise a fun one to see. I believe there 14 of those monkey's in there. Hugs
Mariah

Quote from: katrinaw on June 02, 2015, 05:53:18 AM
Yes I recall the situation so well, it still saddens me that you were all treated that way at Phoenix.... hugs

The fact that you were 2.5 years clear of seizures, that were then brought back primarily with the stress at the Phoenix bus station is disappointing too, I hope now that you'll get back on the long term with out seizure track again.

But so glad the consult went well for you and that you had a nice day at the zoo... monkey looks happy too!

L Katy  :-*

Yes, it certainly turned into a dramatic trip. The last line hits it home in a nutshell and as much as what happen in Phoenix added stress, I wonder how much of that stress was just their from the long trip too Phoenix already. I hope so too. As much as I hate admitting this Grace, I will have no choice but to worry about the chance of having a seizure the rest of my life. This trip drove that home for me. Now if I do everything I'm supposed to I can probably avoid any more seizures for the rest of my life. The first seizures were a result of my kidney's not functioning 3 years ago. Electrolytes had to go somewhere and to the brain they went. So this is the first true seizure not caused by the kidney's. No matter how low the chance of occurrence maybe I will have to see a neurologist the rest of my life to help prevent and avoid seizures if possible. Fingers crossed that I don't have anymore seizures. It was cheaper by far, but not worth it. Hugs
Mariah

Quote from: Ms Grace on June 02, 2015, 05:54:45 AM
Sounds like quite the dramatic trip - I hope the seizures aren't something you need to continue worrying about...??

As for going on long bus trips, they may be cheaper but they sure are stressful.

Quote from: Mariah2014 on June 02, 2015, 05:41:52 AM
Thank Tessa. I hope it goes well too. Insurance and how far he is booked out is why the ticker is set to 10/27/2016. Those people going to see him now on the most part are getting scheduled for 2017 now because he is booked out that far. The insurance set the date up before the consult. I waited to share the exact date tell after the consult in case it was changed for any reason. The consult and zoo were the better parts of the journey for sure. Yep, it sure does and that is one of two reasons I shared that fact. One because CIS people get misgendered and to our first assumptions that we were one's they clocked isn't always right. 40 plus hours on buses wouldn't work and considering he conditions of the bathroom even less so. It would be like asking for an infection. Hugs
Mariah

This is why I:

Ignore people who call me "sir" (almost nobody these days when en femme)

Just power through any misgendering. If I get upset mission accomplished for them.

Exactly why when their is a rare mis-gendering of me now I don't generally give it attention unless necessary. It's the price I pay for so many that are still around me where I live from before and after going full time. No reason to add fuel to the fire. Hugs
Mariah

Quote from: iKate on June 02, 2015, 07:10:47 AM
This is why I:

Ignore people who call me "sir" (almost nobody these days when en femme)

Just power through any misgendering. If I get upset mission accomplished for them.

Last bus trip I took was probably 20 years ago...and it was bad then. Flying is the only way to travel (although I hear train can be enjoyable also). The big difference is time of travel. I like getting there asap.

And yes, getting the hotel (which is one's "home away from home") is first priority. (On my trip, check-in was supposed to be 300pm, but they let me have it at 1230).

So much for no fare buses, eh? Oh wait, AZ is a conservative state...makes me wonder if they've privatized the buses...

I wouldn't do train from here due to the route your on and almost all the changes in train are in the middle of the night. The route through here is based on a certain time through Glacier National Park. I agree plane is the only way to go. The local buses in the Phoenix area run by the city of Phoenix. I have to admit I was impressed with them though. I'm glad they let you check in early Beth. I didn't think they would allow 9am or so check in so checking in that early wasn't possible. Hugs
Mariah.

Quote from: Beth Andrea on June 02, 2015, 07:46:47 AM
Last bus trip I took was probably 20 years ago...and it was bad then. Flying is the only way to travel (although I hear train can be enjoyable also). The big difference is time of travel. I like getting there asap.

And yes, getting the hotel (which is one's "home away from home") is first priority. (On my trip, check-in was supposed to be 300pm, but they let me have it at 1230).

So much for no fare buses, eh? Oh wait, AZ is a conservative state...makes me wonder if they've privatized the buses...

Wow, what an ordeal! I am sorry about the seizure and the dude with the wondering hands. And at least you had your consult and all of that stuff is soon to happen so I'd guess the trip was worth the hassles.

I had a friend that traveled on a train to come see me from Texas to California and from what he said about that trip trains are now off my possible modes of travel as well as buses.

Thanks Eva. That is the important part getting consult taken care of allowing for  me to remove what was really the last real hurdle to the procedure. My only bus trips from here in are going to be to Seattle and to Spokane and no where beyond that. Those have been safe and have few people on them. They are more localized routes. Hearing what your friend went through will definitely make think twice about the train ever either. Planes are clearly the way to go. Hugs
Mariah

Quote from: Eva Marie on June 02, 2015, 08:44:36 AM
Wow, what an ordeal! I am sorry about the seizure and the dude with the wondering hands. And at least you had your consult and all of that stuff is soon to happen so I'd guess the trip was worth the hassles.

I had a friend that traveled on a train to come see me from Texas to California and from what he said about that trip trains are now off my possible modes of travel as well as buses.

Im sorry to hear that your trip was so eventful. However, at least the visit with the doctor went well. Hopefully in the future you will be able to travel with more ease and have to deal with less a**-hattery.

Many blessings,

Melitta Stafford

Thanks Melitta :)

Quote from: Mariah2014 on June 02, 2015, 07:52:47 AM
I wouldn't do train from here due to the route your on and almost all the changes in train are in the middle of the night. The route through here is based on a certain time through Glacier National Park. I agree plane is the only way to go. The local buses in the Phoenix area run by the city of Phoenix. I have to admit I was impressed with them though. I'm glad they let you check in early Beth. I didn't think they would allow 9am or so check in so checking in that early wasn't possible. Hugs
Mariah.

My plane landed at 800am, and I got my rental car (Nissan Altima...niiice!), and found the hotel.

I can confirm they won't let you check in at 900am LOL! They did tell me at that time to come back at 1230, so it wasn't like I was taking a chance (their website said 300pm check-in).

I got a package deal online, but when I got back my ex-sister-in-law let me know I could've saved almost half of what it cost if I'd asked her to look for me. She has mad skilz when it comes to getting deals! I'm going to let her find me a good one for the SRS trip.

Exactly why I toted things with me since I knew I couldn't take them to a zoo with what time would be left otherwise. I clearly put to much in a short period of time. I got a deal through a friend. Plus the fact we checked out way early I ended up paying 90 dollars for a room for 3 people in it which included the breakfast. Next time my intent is to stay directly in Scottsdale close to the surgery center. I have no doubt she can get you a better deal for you though. The place I went was 3pm too. I knew they would allow before middle of the day. Hugs
Mariah

Quote from: Beth Andrea on June 02, 2015, 10:49:17 AM
My plane landed at 800am, and I got my rental car (Nissan Altima...niiice!), and found the hotel.

I can confirm they won't let you check in at 900am LOL! They did tell me at that time to come back at 1230, so it wasn't like I was taking a chance (their website said 300pm check-in).

I got a package deal online, but when I got back my ex-sister-in-law let me know I could've saved almost half of what it cost if I'd asked her to look for me. She has mad skilz when it comes to getting deals! I'm going to let her find me a good one for the SRS trip.

Mariah,

Wow! (That's all she could say, was wow.)

Kudos for persistence and stress under fire. I hope to be as brave and controlled as it seems you were in a similar experience. So sorry for the experience. I only know you from seeing your posts nearly every day, but you are so sweet. You were also one of the people here who helped me out early on when I was freaking out pretty badly. You don't deserve that trip.  At the same time, congrats on a date! So exciting.

Also sorry you need to hold onto the needles. But it sounds like with control you won't ever need them again. You can think of them like my great grandfather's cigarettes. Short story: He lived to be 100. He was an illegal alien, gambled, womanized, drank and smoked till he was 90; then he gave up smoking (great punch line but true). The day he decided to quit smoking, he bought a pack of camels(his brand), rolled it into the sleeve in his t-shirt and always kept it with him. When asked what he was doing, he said "I want to know if I need it, I can have one". 

Hope the rest of your summer is much smoother.

With loving thoughts

Joanna

Joanna your needles remark has me perplexed. I certainly don't recall mentioning such an item and in fact my self injection supplies for my Depo-estradiol were at home since my shot was done on the day I left. Sorry if you someone got that impression in regards to needles. I certainly didn't mean for you too. In fact what was in my hand most of the time was my iPhone. Now to move back to the first of your response. Thank you and I appreciate that a lot. I ws more than glad to help you out. I think we all get to that freaking out stage at one point or another. Hugs
Mariah

Quote from: Joanna50 on June 02, 2015, 11:11:35 AM
Mariah,

Wow! (That's all she could say, was wow.)

Kudos for persistence and stress under fire. I hope to be as brave and controlled as it seems you were in a similar experience. So sorry for the experience. I only know you from seeing your posts nearly every day, but you are so sweet. You were also one of the people here who helped me out early on when I was freaking out pretty badly. You don't deserve that trip.  At the same time, congrats on a date! So exciting.

Also sorry you need to hold onto the needles. But it sounds like with control you won't ever need them again. You can think of them like my great grandfather's cigarettes. Short story: He lived to be 100. He was an illegal alien, gambled, womanized, drank and smoked till he was 90; then he gave up smoking (great punch line but true). The day he decided to quit smoking, he bought a pack of camels(his brand), rolled it into the sleeve in his t-shirt and always kept it with him. When asked what he was doing, he said "I want to know if I need it, I can have one". 

Hope the rest of your summer is much smoother.

With loving thoughts

Joanna

Mariah,

Oops. My mistake. Reading too quickly.

I hadn't a seizure in over 2 and half years at that point. So much to the point that he was ready to start the removal of the seizure medication, but was willing to wait tell after SRS per my request. Needless to say I won't be off of it that quickly, if ever.

I somehow read needless as needles (I have some minor moving around of letters and numbers if I'm not careful when reading, writing or typing). Then I combined that word in with the thrust of the sentence it was in... my bad.

Sorry,

Joanna

No worries Joanna. anyone of us could have done the same thing. If helps you feel better, I figured out how you came up with the word before you showed me how. Hugs
Mariah

Quote from: Joanna50 on June 02, 2015, 11:45:46 AM
Mariah,

Oops. My mistake. Reading too quickly.

I hadn't a seizure in over 2 and half years at that point. So much to the point that he was ready to start the removal of the seizure medication, but was willing to wait tell after SRS per my request. Needless to say I won't be off of it that quickly, if ever.

I somehow read needless as needles (I have some minor moving around of letters and numbers if I'm not careful when reading, writing or typing). Then I combined that word in with the thrust of the sentence it was in... my bad.

Sorry,

Joanna

congrats on your survival abilities.

Thanks Stephanie