Susan's Place Transgender Resources

sat in doctors with 5 other women nobody looked lol until stupid doctor said my name lol it was like when frodo puts on the ring and the eye of mordor stares at you.They were like what.now have told them my names Lauren

Big hug! Get busy! https://www.susans.org/wiki/Changing_legal_name

Hugs, Devlyn

Hugs. I have been there before when I went full time. Needless to say I corrected the name issue quickly, but I feel your pain. It's a riot of passage. A name change will easily take care of that. Hugs
Mariah

Lauren Bacall did a lot of full-time passing as female . . . And let's speculate here that the other "women" were not all cis . . .  Relax! No one cares.

I would have answered the doctor, "It's not Lauren, and you're in some really seriously deep ->-bleeped-<- now young man!"

"Says right here on your license you're male!"
"That's right officer, that's what it says . . . "

Not changing my name, not doing anything radical/invasive/irreversible. (I'm 67, and pretty set on who I am.)

That said, I'm open about how I feel. Wearing the same casual, recreational clothing (Coast Week-end Casual) as everyone else, M & F. Not moving from M to F. We're moving from Male to middle "A" -- alternate, ambiguous, androgynous, asexual . . .

Not wearing the skirts, dresses, etc. Gawd knows I have them. I have cis-F friends who don't/can't wear skirts/dresses. The skirt thing doesn't work for some of us. No "kilts" -- That misses the whole point!

Mostly, I look at style, coordination, pragmatic functional clothing. Layers to control changing temps. Rugged for recreation, panache because it's F rather than M on the label. But mostly I just wear what works. We're less and less concerned about "labels" in all regards.

Lately the larger, more dangling earrings, large hoops, are  beginning to work for me.

NOBODY LOOKS TWICE.

NOBODY CARES!

makes me glad I go to a doctors office that specializes in LGBT care, even from my most clearly masculine first appointment I was called Serena and addressed by all the staff as she.

Its was funny, First time I went to the doctor, I made the apointment over the phone, So all I had to do was say, I have an apointment for such oclock.

When I went in for my blood test, A young nurse came ut and said old title and old name. I was exspecting this to happen and I wasnt exacly comfatable in the crowded waiting room. I stood up and the womans face dropped. OGM im so sorry, I said its ok I havent changed my name legally yet,  so its somthing I have to  get used to.

She said do you have a name yet, I told her I did and what it was, she goes Im still very sorry and you know we can make a note on you file listing you preffered name. I didnt know this I told her.

Quote from: ButterflyVickster on July 20, 2015, 03:33:32 AM
Its was funny, First time I went to the doctor, I made the apointment over the phone, So all I had to do was say, I have an apointment for such oclock.

When I went in for my blood test, A young nurse came ut and said old title and old name. I was exspecting this to happen and I wasnt exacly comfatable in the crowded waiting room. I stood up and the womans face dropped. OGM im so sorry, I said its ok I havent changed my name legally yet,  so its somthing I have to  get used to.

She said do you have a name yet, I told her I did and what it was, she goes Im still very sorry and you know we can make a note on you file listing you preffered name. I didnt know this I told her.

my one did not even say sorry that cow

Some (decent) doctor's use a "preferred name" option. You should enquire about that, especially if you are presenting as female but haven't yet changed your details. Might avoid some embarrassments.

Yenneffer - i'm sorry that happened to you. I had something similar happen to me.

I am full time with name and gender legally changed. I got pink eye so I went to the local clinic to have them see about it. I had been there previously as a guy, so I quietly explained at the counter what the deal was when I first got there.

So I was sitting in the waiting area and sure enough they came out and asked for <male name>. I looked at the guy with a raised eyebrow but I didn't budge. With amusement I saw some consternation going on behind the counter and I just kept reading my magazine. Someone finally figured it out and they came back and asked for Eva, and I went back.

Yes, it pissed me off. Maybe they learned a lesson that day.

the receptionists at my doctors never use my first name although it can be used as female and they never use sir or mister just my last name.

I go to a LGBT clinic and sometimes they use my preferred name. Sometimes they do not. And it irritates me. Only in the waiting room. The nurse practitioner I see is also trans and she treats me with respect. When waiting for the phlebotomist I am sure I pass because nobody really looks at me funny (including kids) and I am gendered correctly.

However my name is also used by some women, so it is not THAT bad.

And my name change is in process so I won't have that problem in a couple of months.

Quote from: Yenneffer on July 20, 2015, 03:41:16 AM
my one did not even say sorry that cow

NHS staff are required to use your legal name. If you have not changed your old name to a new one they will continue using your old name. Once you have changed your name, go to your GP and get a new NHS number issued in your new name and then all NHS staff will use your new name.

They do not know who you are, what you look like or what your condition is. They just have an appointment and they call out the name against your appointment. Of course they did not apologise - they had nothing to apologise for.

Quote from: vcjhyt on July 27, 2015, 12:41:16 PM
NHS staff are required to use your legal name. If you have not changed your old name to a new one they will continue using your old name. Once you have changed your name, go to your GP and get a new NHS number issued in your new name and then all NHS staff will use your new name.

They do not know who you are, what you look like or what your condition is. They just have an appointment and they call out the name against your appointment. Of course they did not apologise - they had nothing to apologise for.

You could have a look at this NHS brochure, at page 6 :
gires.org.uk/assets/DOH-Assets/pdf/doh-transgender-experiences.pdf

Medical professionals should use
names, titles and wherever possible
hospital accommodation that the
individuals concerned regard as
appropriate. This will usually be consistent
with their dress and presentation. If the
situation is unclear, medical staff should
discuss these issues with the individual ...

Quote from: Laura_7 on July 27, 2015, 01:13:00 PM
You could have a look at this NHS brochure, at page 6 :
gires.org.uk/assets/DOH-Assets/pdf/doh-transgender-experiences.pdf

Medical professionals should use
names, titles and wherever possible
hospital accommodation that the
individuals concerned regard as
appropriate. This will usually be consistent
with their dress and presentation. If the
situation is unclear, medical staff should
discuss these issues with the individual ...

I would not disagree with any of that, but what many people fail to understand is that the NHS is not a single organisation. It is a vast collection of independent organisations and each one can set their own rules. The guidelines are that - guidelines. It was made quite clear to me (and other transitioners that I know) that the staff must use the names on the medical records.

You can indeed ask local medical staff to use particular names but because all NHS organisations go by your medical record - keyed by your NHS number - you would have to tell every single organisation. The only way to get them al done is to change the "NHS Spine record" as it is known and that requires your GP to tell the local CCG to issue a new record and to link it to your old record so that existing and previous conditions/treatments are still available but you will now be correctly referred to as your new name. I have yet to hear of a GP who will do this without sight of a legal document such as a Deed Poll or a Statutory Declaration. Even married women have to show their marriage certificate.

Terri and Bernard at GIRES are nice people and hey write an awful lot of very, very sensible stuff but they are an independent body and not part of the NHS. They do get involved with a lot of NHS organisations but they have no power to enforce the stuff they write.

Quote from: vcjhyt on July 27, 2015, 12:41:16 PM
NHS staff are required to use your legal name. If you have not changed your old name to a new one they will continue using your old name. Once you have changed your name, go to your GP and get a new NHS number issued in your new name and then all NHS staff will use your new name.

They do not know who you are, what you look like or what your condition is. They just have an appointment and they call out the name against your appointment. Of course they did not apologise - they had nothing to apologise for.

Well imo lets be frank... some things lag behind what is considered appropriate by many people...
of course a name change is preferrable... but until then people can be nicely asked to use preferred names... there are extra fields in computer programs for it, or a tape can be sticked on a file if its in writing  :) 

hugs