Community Conversation => Youth talk => Topic started by: FlinchCat on August 26, 2015, 11:12:01 PM Return to Full Version
Title: How to deal with conservative parents.
Post by: FlinchCat on August 26, 2015, 11:12:01 PM
Post by: FlinchCat on August 26, 2015, 11:12:01 PM
*hyperventilates in corner*
ISSUES ARE HAPPENING!
So my mom is not really dealing with me being trans well, and is thinking that it's a pubertal phase. Considering what levels I'm seeing trans behavior at in the past, there's a 0.00000001% chance of that being true. She keeps talking (or, my dad does) about how they're getting a therapist to help. Dad said it was someone just to talk to, but my mom is treating it like it will fix me. So there's a reasonable chance that it's going to be a therapist that will try to get me out of this and if it is I'm going to need a lot of help of how to deal with it and my parents and what to do because I'm not sure if they would even want me around even though they say they love me so much yet they dont support any female behavior and ARGH.
ISSUES ARE HAPPENING!
So my mom is not really dealing with me being trans well, and is thinking that it's a pubertal phase. Considering what levels I'm seeing trans behavior at in the past, there's a 0.00000001% chance of that being true. She keeps talking (or, my dad does) about how they're getting a therapist to help. Dad said it was someone just to talk to, but my mom is treating it like it will fix me. So there's a reasonable chance that it's going to be a therapist that will try to get me out of this and if it is I'm going to need a lot of help of how to deal with it and my parents and what to do because I'm not sure if they would even want me around even though they say they love me so much yet they dont support any female behavior and ARGH.
Title: Re: How to deal with conservative parents.
Post by: stephaniec on August 26, 2015, 11:34:51 PM
Post by: stephaniec on August 26, 2015, 11:34:51 PM
well, I hope they find you a professional therapist because they are in the medical profession and should be objective in how they talk to you. I'd be somewhat concerned if it was a religious affiliated therapist, but you could always talk to a school counselor to help you out.
Title: Re: How to deal with conservative parents.
Post by: suzifrommd on August 27, 2015, 11:11:45 AM
Post by: suzifrommd on August 27, 2015, 11:11:45 AM
Really, the only two things you can do is to keep trying to educate them and to try to enlist outside help.
Your mom needs to know that no one has ever come up with a way to "fix" trans people. This has nothing to do with being conservative. It is a fact. Many conservatives pride themselves on their willingness to accept reality.
If you go to a therapist and he/she says he/she can fix you, refuse to go back. That therapist is not competent and may be harmful.
Your mom needs to know that no one has ever come up with a way to "fix" trans people. This has nothing to do with being conservative. It is a fact. Many conservatives pride themselves on their willingness to accept reality.
If you go to a therapist and he/she says he/she can fix you, refuse to go back. That therapist is not competent and may be harmful.
Title: Re: How to deal with conservative parents.
Post by: FlinchCat on August 29, 2015, 01:00:47 AM
Post by: FlinchCat on August 29, 2015, 01:00:47 AM
I think it's more on the fact that I realized my gender just a little while ago, so they think it's just a passing phase. Considering the level I'm seeing trans behavior in the past, and... stuff I don't want to get into here, I know 100% that I am trans.
Title: Re: How to deal with conservative parents.
Post by: Dena on August 29, 2015, 02:40:25 AM
Post by: Dena on August 29, 2015, 02:40:25 AM
I don't know how much you have lurked on the board but transsexuals can be discovered from age 3 to past age 60. There is no set age you know when you are transsexual but it's pretty common to figure it out by the time puberty hits. While there is a 1 in 600 chance of being born transsexual, the fact you are on this board indicates you are the one.
As for fixing you, my mother figured she could fix me and found my first therapist. He was a nice guy but he knew he didn't have a clue how to treat me. He did find possible treatment in California where I moved to and eventually did receive proper treatment.
At least your parents are like mine in that they aren't attempting to kick you out and are trying to get you some form of therapy. I don't think any therapist will ever talk you out of what you feel but there are a few that will try, If you encounter one, explain to them that you know better and unless they will provide real treatment, you will refuse to cooperate.
As for fixing you, my mother figured she could fix me and found my first therapist. He was a nice guy but he knew he didn't have a clue how to treat me. He did find possible treatment in California where I moved to and eventually did receive proper treatment.
At least your parents are like mine in that they aren't attempting to kick you out and are trying to get you some form of therapy. I don't think any therapist will ever talk you out of what you feel but there are a few that will try, If you encounter one, explain to them that you know better and unless they will provide real treatment, you will refuse to cooperate.
Title: Re: How to deal with conservative parents.
Post by: FlinchCat on August 29, 2015, 03:27:46 AM
Post by: FlinchCat on August 29, 2015, 03:27:46 AM
1 in 600. hmm. didn't know that.
I've actually read some things that pretty much 100% confirm me being a trans female. So that's relieving... and stressful. My parents want to talk to me tomorrow. Can't sleep.
I've actually read some things that pretty much 100% confirm me being a trans female. So that's relieving... and stressful. My parents want to talk to me tomorrow. Can't sleep.