Community Conversation => Transitioning => Coming out of the closet => Topic started by: victoriafrantic on November 09, 2015, 07:47:07 PM Return to Full Version
Title: I might be coming out at work (and everywhere) soon!
Post by: victoriafrantic on November 09, 2015, 07:47:07 PM
Post by: victoriafrantic on November 09, 2015, 07:47:07 PM
A quick bit of background... 37 years old MTF, HRT for 7 weeks. 34C (WTF) breasts...
When I started HRT 7 weeks ago, I talked to my boss, the HR manager, and the CEO (it's a small company, about 30 people) within the first week. I told them I had started hormones and was transitioning, and I talked to them about what to expect.
At the time, I was imagining the "typical" coming out at work timeline... keep it quiet for 8+ months until boymode starts to fail, have a big office announcement one day, and come to work the next day as a woman. This is what I explained to them, and at the time I couldn't imagine doing it any differently.
Now, 7 weeks later, I feel like there's a girl inside of me, bursting to be out. The last seven weeks have been the happiest 7 weeks of my life. I've made new friends. Somehow, my breasts have grown to 34C (I wouldn't have believed it, but I went for a bra fitting and they confirmed it). My social anxiety (severe, medically diagnosed) has dropped like crazy, and today the biggest source of anxiety for me right now is people NOT knowing I'm transgender. But, I don't have hardly any female clothes, and I have a 100% male face. I'm totally not ready to go full time. If I come out now, I still will not be able to go full time for several months.
I've been 100% open with my boss (and his wife, my new best friend!) and I talked to him today about it, because I'm trying to figure out - am I crazy for wanting to come out to everyone so soon, while I still look like a man? His response was basically exactly what I'd been thinking - why hold this in for so long. Everyone will be supportive (this is likely true). You must be bursting with happieniess and want to share this. I think it will be less akward and easier if you tell people now, rather than wait for so long.
So I think I'm going to do it. For sure I'm going to talk with HR (hopefully tomorrow), but I'm the first trans person there and she basically told me that they'd support whatever I do. Probably a week or two from today I'm going to tell everyone at work that I'm a transgender woman. My plan is to come out globally on Facebook shortly after. And still go full-time on my own schedule.
Since I started HRT, my secret wish has been to go to our Christmas party as a real person. the real me. a woman. Now... it looks like this might actually happen!
I can't wait. I'm so happy. Finally OUT OF THE CLOSET. Soon.
When I started HRT 7 weeks ago, I talked to my boss, the HR manager, and the CEO (it's a small company, about 30 people) within the first week. I told them I had started hormones and was transitioning, and I talked to them about what to expect.
At the time, I was imagining the "typical" coming out at work timeline... keep it quiet for 8+ months until boymode starts to fail, have a big office announcement one day, and come to work the next day as a woman. This is what I explained to them, and at the time I couldn't imagine doing it any differently.
Now, 7 weeks later, I feel like there's a girl inside of me, bursting to be out. The last seven weeks have been the happiest 7 weeks of my life. I've made new friends. Somehow, my breasts have grown to 34C (I wouldn't have believed it, but I went for a bra fitting and they confirmed it). My social anxiety (severe, medically diagnosed) has dropped like crazy, and today the biggest source of anxiety for me right now is people NOT knowing I'm transgender. But, I don't have hardly any female clothes, and I have a 100% male face. I'm totally not ready to go full time. If I come out now, I still will not be able to go full time for several months.
I've been 100% open with my boss (and his wife, my new best friend!) and I talked to him today about it, because I'm trying to figure out - am I crazy for wanting to come out to everyone so soon, while I still look like a man? His response was basically exactly what I'd been thinking - why hold this in for so long. Everyone will be supportive (this is likely true). You must be bursting with happieniess and want to share this. I think it will be less akward and easier if you tell people now, rather than wait for so long.
So I think I'm going to do it. For sure I'm going to talk with HR (hopefully tomorrow), but I'm the first trans person there and she basically told me that they'd support whatever I do. Probably a week or two from today I'm going to tell everyone at work that I'm a transgender woman. My plan is to come out globally on Facebook shortly after. And still go full-time on my own schedule.
Since I started HRT, my secret wish has been to go to our Christmas party as a real person. the real me. a woman. Now... it looks like this might actually happen!
I can't wait. I'm so happy. Finally OUT OF THE CLOSET. Soon.
Title: Re: I might be coming out at work (and everywhere) soon!
Post by: victoriafrantic on November 10, 2015, 01:00:36 PM
Post by: victoriafrantic on November 10, 2015, 01:00:36 PM
There is no more "maybe". Just chatted with hr and we are figuring out a date some time in the next two weeks. Hello brave new world!
Title: Re: I might be coming out at work (and everywhere) soon!
Post by: WorkingOnThomas on November 12, 2015, 07:02:19 AM
Post by: WorkingOnThomas on November 12, 2015, 07:02:19 AM
Congratulations Victoria. I'm out already, at work, with family, on Facebook, etc. And while I'm probably not entirely convincing, I still feel good about doing it. And nearly everyone who matters to me has been incredibly supportive. Especially at work.
I hope things go as well for you.
Thomas
I hope things go as well for you.
Thomas
Title: Re: I might be coming out at work (and everywhere) soon!
Post by: victoriafrantic on November 12, 2015, 01:37:55 PM
Post by: victoriafrantic on November 12, 2015, 01:37:55 PM
Thanks. It must feel great to be out.
Things have firmed up, and it looks like the big date will probably be the 24th, which also happens to be my birthday! It seems somehow appropriate that "Dave" won't have any more birthdays, and Victoria gets to be born on on her actual birthday!
I'm so excited!
Things have firmed up, and it looks like the big date will probably be the 24th, which also happens to be my birthday! It seems somehow appropriate that "Dave" won't have any more birthdays, and Victoria gets to be born on on her actual birthday!
I'm so excited!
Title: Re: I might be coming out at work (and everywhere) soon!
Post by: Emjay on November 12, 2015, 02:03:55 PM
Post by: Emjay on November 12, 2015, 02:03:55 PM
Congratulations Victoria, I hope everything continues to go smoothly!
It's a good feeling, knowing that the wait is almost over.
It's a good feeling, knowing that the wait is almost over.