Susan's Place Transgender Resources

I get so upset at times as like tonight i'm suppose to be with my children and my sister Terry whom is very nasty has all my kids going to her house for a yankee swap. My daughter i called her and asked her what time she wanted me at her house and I would bring the steaks. She said I will see you at your sister Terry's and my son said the same thing. Well my sister didn't ask me to come because she has a bunch of her friends coming to her party and she doesn't want to be embarrassed by me. Im so destroyed by this in my heart.I knew when I started this it would be hard but it is much worst than that. I get so lonely at times. I just want out of here. Very depressed right now.

Lyndsey

Hugs - I understand, I know it really hurts. My sister has her head up her @$$ about me, I can't do anything with her family because she won't tell her daughter (my niece), for any range of dubious and spurious reasons. After all I've done to support her over the years she was the last one I would have expected to treat me this way - even my father has come around before her. So yeah, family. I want to just tell my sister she's being a total cow and that I'm so angry with her but that will just push her away even further. So I tend to ignore her most of the time instead. Ultimately it's her loss, not mine. The same no doubt applies to your sister.

Hope you feel better soon *hugs*  :-\

There's a lot of potential sadness when family member decide to be un-accepting and at times impolite to out right nasty.  There's little to be done about it as their behavior is all about them, not us.  I wish it were different but . . .

Keep positive about yourself and in time these things will lose their sting - not ever be loving and caring but the hurt won't be there anymore.

Take good care,

Rachel

Quote from: Ms Grace on December 19, 2015, 05:06:00 PM
Hugs - I understand, I know it really hurts. My sister has her head up her @$$ about me, I can't do anything with her family because she won't tell her daughter (my niece), for any range of dubious and spurious reasons. After all I've done to support her over the years she was the last one I would have expected to treat me this way - even my father has come around before her. So yeah, family. I want to just tell my sister she's being a total cow and that I'm so angry with her but that will just push her away even further. So I tend to ignore her most of the time instead. Ultimately it's her loss, not mine. The same no doubt applies to your sister.

Hi Grace

It can be so nasty out there and for no reason. I like you have one sister the is so cruel. she has bee doing everything in her power to out me and destroy me. it is not like I just came out and did anything wrong it is just done out of spite. she found out that I had SRS in October and wrote a big article about me and put to online. She was saying that I will never be a women and then that I'm a fake and ugly women. She said I will never look like my sister Dawn who is my twin and the prettiest in the family. Not to spite her but my sister and I are very close and she has never left my side. And the best part of that is when her and I go out together every is saying you to have to be twins. So I don't look that bad i guess. well to top it all off today my sister that hates me came over crying and saying that she is so sorry for the way that she has treated me and she want to get the whole family together and except me back. I'm not going to lie but I have been burn so bad by her that the though of it scares the hell out of me . After she left I broke down and that was 4hours ago. i'm finally able to see as my eyes were pretty swollen from crying. This is something that I have been praying for and I hope this all goes well. The only other reason that I can think of is she found out that I'm sick again. which i did not tell her anything about.

Hugs I love you guys here You are all so kind!!!

Lyndsey

Quote from: Vinyl Scratch on December 19, 2015, 05:11:04 PM
Hope you feel better soon *hugs*  :-\

thank you Sweetie :angel :angel:
Hugs Lyndsey

Quote from: Qrachel on December 19, 2015, 05:15:43 PM
There's a lot of potential sadness when family member decide to be un-accepting and at times impolite to out right nasty.  There's little to be done about it as their behavior is all about them, not us.  I wish it were different but . . .

Keep positive about yourself and in time these things will lose their sting - not ever be loving and caring but the hurt won't be there anymore.

Take good care,

Rachel

Hi Rachel

You are so right family can be so hard Believe me I have found that out

Big Hugs and thank you for being here

Lyndsey

Hi All My Sweet Friend

I just have to say that I love you all and this place is so good for help and love from friends. I so appreciate all the kind word and strength that you have all given me. You are all angels and we are all together here.  :angel: :angel: :angel: :angel:

On another note I live in Massachusetts as of now and I will be moving to my other home way up in New Hampshire and It will be so much better for me as that is were I want to be.  My house up there is plenty big enough for all my kids and grand children and friend to come up and even stay.  :angel: :angel:

Hug's
Lyndsey

She does not sound like she is worth your tears, as a human being, if she is literally out to destroy you.

Not ashamed, or confused, or angry but literally out to wreck your soul? Well I know what I'd say to her if she was my sister, and I couldn't print it here because it'd be removed.

If people are becoming a disease in your life, you really do have to cut your losses and find better ones. As difficult as it is (I understand how much).

My sister did not have anything to do with me for several years, and refused to tell my niece and nephew that I am trans, so I missed getting to know them, and they me; it's a shame that some people can be that callous, and I hope that your sister has a change of heart soon.

Quote from: T.K.G.W. on December 20, 2015, 07:08:46 PM
She does not sound like she is worth your tears, as a human being, if she is literally out to destroy you.

Not ashamed, or confused, or angry but literally out to wreck your soul? Well I know what I'd say to her if she was my sister, and I couldn't print it here because it'd be removed.

If people are becoming a disease in your life, you really do have to cut your losses and find better ones. As difficult as it is (I understand how much).

I agree with you completely but something in my heart is saying give it a try it would be pretty hard for her to destroy me anymore than she already has. I could only go up hill from here.

Hug's
Lyndsey

Quote from: kittenpower on December 21, 2015, 01:59:03 AM
My sister did not have anything to do with me for several years, and refused to tell my niece and nephew that I am trans, so I missed getting to know them, and they me; it's a shame that some people can be that callous, and I hope that your sister has a change of heart soon.

Hi Sweetie

I can't be hurt by her anymore. I can only go up from here. I'm scared of her! But I will be keeping a huge guard with her.

Lyndsey

Big hugs.

My parents and sister don't want anything to do with me and haven't since I came out 6 years ago.

Thankfully my brother is cool and he gets it. My husband's parents are deceased so we don't have much family there.

I end up making my own family nowadays through friends and such

Quote from: Lyndsey on December 21, 2015, 10:46:48 AM
Hi Sweetie

I can't be hurt by her anymore. I can only go up from here. I'm scared of her! But I will be keeping a huge guard with her.

Lyndsey

Biblical wisdom (if you are into all of that) calls us to forgive others 70x7 times. (effectively always). I love the apparent evidence that she has repented of her evil and is contrite. i believe that everyone can change at any time and will always believe that.

Still, your past experiences with her repentance might lead you to think otherwise understandably. I hope it all works out and you can reconcile.

Sorry you had to go through this.

Quote from: Debra on December 22, 2015, 12:36:31 PM
Big hugs.

My parents and sister don't want anything to do with me and haven't since I came out 6 years ago.

Thankfully my brother is cool and he gets it. My husband's parents are deceased so we don't have much family there.

I end up making my own family nowadays through friends and such

Hi Debra
I have been managing to have at least my two oldest children whom are backing me completely. I have my youngest daughter who has nothing to do with me at all but on Christmas day always seams to come by and get a gift from me. then I have my three sisters and two brothers My twin sister and my youngest sites have stayed close to me but the rest of the family has nothing to do with me. So I make do with what I have. this year when my youngest daughter come to get something there will be nothing there. Oh Well!!

Hug's
Lyndsey

Quote from: RobynD on December 22, 2015, 12:58:32 PM
Biblical wisdom (if you are into all of that) calls us to forgive others 70x7 times. (effectively always). I love the apparent evidence that she has repented of her evil and is contrite. i believe that everyone can change at any time and will always believe that.

Still, your past experiences with her repentance might lead you to think otherwise understandably. I hope it all works out and you can reconcile.

Sorry you had to go through this.

Hi Robyn
Thank You for the kind words as I feel like you do and I go to church and Pray every weekend and I have been excepted there with open arms

Hug"s
Lyndsey

Dear Lindsey:

It's been 15+ years since I came out.  My entire families' reaction was rejection, total rejection.  My daughters, for whom I was extremely close to disowned me and thus the grandchildren too.  Though there has been a few instances of communication; it's mostly none at all.

I wish I had something to say encouraging here, but about all I can say is cherish the relationships you have and hope that others will have a change of heart.  I'm cut off entirely from my family and I still miss them but not painfully; however, life goes on and I try to make friends and have relationships whenever possible. In no way am I lonely and I do have some terrific friends . . . I'm content.

I mention this only to illustrate that people and family are fickle but life moves on.  We love them nonetheless and sometimes receive grief and pain in return for our efforts.  Still, I'd do it all again and would consider the resulting suffering as part of the deal that was never in my control nor based on a relationship as strong as I thought existed --- being a little wiser and occasionally sadder for the experience.

All in all though, there's nothing like seeing an extended expanse of time pass living as Rachel and appreciating the world so much more fully than was possible before transition.  I'm certain that will occur for you as well.

Take good care from someone who been there and moved on,

Rachel

Quote from: Lyndsey on December 22, 2015, 04:29:25 PM
Hi Debra
I have been managing to have at least my two oldest children whom are backing me completely. I have my youngest daughter who has nothing to do with me at all but on Christmas day always seams to come by and get a gift from me. then I have my three sisters and two brothers My twin sister and my youngest sites have stayed close to me but the rest of the family has nothing to do with me. So I make do with what I have. this year when my youngest daughter come to get something there will be nothing there. Oh Well!!

Hug's
Lyndsey

Glad to hear you do have some support! We sometimes have to try to be happy with what we have....but I know...it's rather difficult sometimes.

Quote from: Debra on December 22, 2015, 07:47:35 PM
Glad to hear you do have some support! We sometimes have to try to be happy with what we have....but I know...it's rather difficult sometimes.

It can be very difficult

Lynn

my sisters turned on my father and when I got in there way they turned on me even though  I realized they never liked me any way. then when my niece sought me out on the internet she dropped me like a hot potato when I thought it would be better she knew than me hiding it.

Family can be hard . and you can loose them like a friend that has gone south. You always end up in the same place once in a while. Like funerals.