Susan's Place Transgender Resources

It's so strange, going from long periods of waiting and no progress to EVERYTHING HAPPENING ALL AT ONCE! I'm in a completely different place than I was when I was last active here. Literally, physically, emotionally, every possible way.

I came out at work. Finally. So I guess that makes me full time, at last. It took a month of bothering but they even changed my first name in the system to my preferred name. However, the HR person strongly "suggested" I not use the men's room until I "look more masculine" meaning I have facial hair? She's never actually seen me and works in another state. But that's a fight for another day. I'm just happy to be called Colin at work.

I finally made an appointment to see a doctor about getting T. After some research, I found Dr. Ben Ly (in the Legacy Northwest clinic). And he is flat out amazing. I've been afraid to go to doctors because I've never been treated well, and he was so awesome I'm actually looking forward to him. Anyone in the Portland area, I strongly suggest him.

That was yesterday.

I already have a vial of T sitting in my bathroom. He was able to process all my tests and get my prescription to me that fast. He put me on a half dose. My head is kind of spinning. I was expecting a long wait to mentally prepare.

I'm a little bit scared. I've never given myself injections before. I need to remember this isn't like stabbing yourself with a safety pin or something. I'm going to take my first shot in the morning. I didn't want to rush it when I got home from work.

I start T tomorrow. I don't think that's quite sunk in just yet.

Welcome my brother to your new life.

Enjoy!

Congrats on getting a good doc! Definitely take the time to get it right on your injection--it's normal to be nervous. Lots of good stuff coming your way for sure.

Congratulations :)

Congrats!

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The journey is amazing I'm sooo happy for you brotha!!!!!

Congratulations!  As someone who has stabbed themselves with safety pins before (when I was 14 that was how I pierced my ears and nose Heaven help me), I promise you that injections are a lot less painful!  ;)

Enjoy! You will get used to injections. Just make yourself a little routine and it will be over in just a few minutes, and you can go back to your life. Happy to hear things have been going well for you!

Like FTMax said,  you'll establish a routine that will help you with shot jitters.  They are completely normal. 

Congratulations! I'm glad things have been going well!

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Congratulations! I think that's what everyone here would call progress. Well done.

As to the bathroom thing, no matter what that HR person thinks, you'll know it's time to switch when (a) you just feel too out of place in the W, or (b) your co-workers start giving you a hard time about it. Or both.

Thank you everyone!

Quote from: Tysilio on April 16, 2016, 04:49:05 PM
Congratulations! I think that's what everyone here would call progress. Well done.

As to the bathroom thing, no matter what that HR person thinks, you'll know it's time to switch when (a) you just feel too out of place in the W, or (b) your co-workers start giving you a hard time about it. Or both.

The thing right now is I'm not 100% comfortable in either. I get weird looks in both but no one has said anything. I'm in that weird, murky middle ground of too masculine to be feminine and too feminine to be masculine. Hopefully over the coming months that will shift a lot more toward the end I want.

Well if HR failed to define exactly what 'looking more masculine' means you could probably just do whatever you want

Quote from: Peep on April 16, 2016, 05:18:13 PM
Well if HR failed to define exactly what 'looking more masculine' means you could probably just do whatever you want

Oh, they did define it. Their definition, for some reason, is "having facial hair." The joke on my team is that now our manager has to use the women's room because he doesn't have any.

Okay. Work stuff aside. To make this officially progress type stuff, we need a baseline. A comparison of sorts. So here's my pre-T photo:

(https://40.media.tumblr.com/bbb6a31cfff74a8771b2e9e70a137bac/tumblr_o5r0m4FPUi1snoc3fo1_1280.jpg)

Currently at 285lbs. I've lost 38lbs since mid-October. Here's hoping that trend continues and soon I'll feel comfortable enough to ditch the hoodie for a photo.

I've seen cismen that look more like "girls" than you, which isn't the point anyways. If they know you identify as male they need to respect that by letting you in the male restroom. If they're scared that you might have issues have one of your supportive male coworkers go with you.

I've been on T for like 5 days so no noticeable changes but I've used the male restroom a few times and only had one problem. I could only really pass for a prepubescent boy and I guess that's why the man thought I was a girl was because we were in a pub. Other than that one time I've been fine.

Also congrats :D

The HR lady made a big deal about what's "legal" and I did a poor job of explaining Oregon laws about it (we're one of the most open, liberal states where it comes to bathroom laws). She's in California and misunderstood the law.

Soon I won't have to worry about it, tho. I have a feeling that the whole facial hair issue will be taken care of in short order. It's always been a problem for me. Thick, dark hairs on my chin and upper lip that until recently I obsessively plucked. The moment the hormones take hold...I should probably invest in an electric razor in the coming weeks. Both sides of my family have no problem growing thick beards.

And congrats on 5-days in!

Quote from: Tysilio on April 16, 2016, 04:49:05 PM
As to the bathroom thing, no matter what that HR person thinks, you'll know it's time to switch when (a) you just feel too out of place in the W, or (b) your co-workers start giving you a hard time about it. Or both.

I'm dreading this so much. Worked at the same place for 11 years (longest I've ever worked anywhere). I use the men's room super rarely. I don't want anyone to feel uncomfortable. I could use the single use rooms but the ones on my floor never seem as clean and comfortable as the big restrooms.

I don't know where that point will trigger. I think I will have to switch to men's in public once I get passable again (ah, misspent youth), but my coworkers know me so they've never kicked me out of the women's room. And I don't want to wait until they do because I'd feel really bad about it. (I care about what they think. Random bathroom policers in public? Get a life, lady.)

My city has a bathroom ordnance which is good because it looks like I'm going to be waiting a long time for those sideburns I've always wanted.  :icon_anger:

So it seems the lady in question is working in our office for the week, and she invited me to stop by her office to say hello. I just may have to do that, so she can SEE me.

But ugh. This week is turning out to be....strange. So the day before my shot, I got smacked in my face with a wicked allergy attack. One that's only now fading. And 12 hours after I gave myself my shot I started my damn period. So it's been a constant guessing game of "which thing is making me feel like this?"

I feel for you having all these situations to work through.  I am in college and now use the men's all the time when out.  Here at school I go to a building where I don't have any classes and is unlikely that I will see anyone I know.  Just finished shark week so know the dysphoria of having there too.

So I started using the "Gender Neutral" bathroom at work. Which they still haven't changed the sign for. And there's no trash bin in the stall, which makes for incredibly awkward moments during shark week. Thankfully no one else was in there.

I have also now given myself my second shot. Last week was 20 minutes of "oh god I can't do this!" and today it took me longer to get the dosage into the syringe than it did to give myself the shot. So yay progress!

Congrats on your second shot. You'll be an expert before long! ;D

thorhugs, pre-t here and using the men's does make for some interesting times during sharkweek.  When this happens during the week when I am on campus I try to go when I expect no one else in there.  I pull my tampon carefully and rap it in paper well and hopefully I can push it into the trash before anyone comes in.  I worry about getting a drop of blood somewhere that I can't remove easily.

Is it still a neutral bathroom if it's not equipped for all genders? lol
Email HR i suppose, if you can bear talking about shark week with them :/ awks

I'm so glad you had a positive experience at the GIC. It gives me a little hope for my appointment.

Peep, I have been in neutral bathrooms that have bins for sharkweek stuff.

Quote from: mm on April 26, 2016, 09:55:04 AM
Peep, I have been in neutral bathrooms that have bins for sharkweek stuff.

ya but OP says the one at his work doesn't have one :C not so good

I ended up sending a email about the bathroom thing. Within the week they added a trashcan to the stall! And she lit a fire under the people who are supposed to get the sign changed. So that's a positive.

As for hormones, three weeks in and I'm definitely starting to see the tiniest changes. The allergies or cold or whatever it was cleared up but my throat remains sore. Which I'm assuming is a good sign.

The biggest change has been "down there" with sensitivity getting cranked to 11. Which is irritating. So far my most overt change is the one I cared about least.

I'm definitely seeing why they warn it can cause weight gain. My weight loss efforts have been delayed. Making some diet and exercise changes to hopefully mitigate that and get back on track. When I started my shots I was at 285, and the scale keeps creeping closer to 290.

I have my followup visit in 3 weeks. Hopefully I'll get boosted to a full dose rather than a half dose and things can progress a bit faster.

Quote from: thorhugs on May 06, 2016, 02:57:26 PM
The biggest change has been "down there" with sensitivity getting cranked to 11. Which is irritating. So far my most overt change is the one I cared about least.

I'm almost at the three week mark and this has been the biggest change for me too. Wish I could enjoy it more, lol, but it's mostly just painful at this point.

Quote from: Jonathan L on May 06, 2016, 07:07:27 PM
I'm almost at the three week mark and this has been the biggest change for me too. Wish I could enjoy it more, lol, but it's mostly just painful at this point.

It's not painful for me, but it's certainly close. Mostly it's frustrating and distracting. C'mon body, focus those changes somewhere that actually matters please.

Thor! I'm posting partly to congratulate you on your progress and your bathroom victory, and partly to inform you you have beautiful hair :3 it's just so perfect. Though I'm sure you're already aware.

Quote from: nameuser on May 07, 2016, 07:45:50 AM
Thor! I'm posting partly to congratulate you on your progress and your bathroom victory, and partly to inform you you have beautiful hair :3 it's just so perfect. Though I'm sure you're already aware.

Oh gosh, thank you!

--

I am now a month in! With all of the other posts I've been seeing, I figured it would be autumn before I saw any sort of facial hair growth. Forgetting my own genetics. I'm already seeing quite a bit. Most of it is that super light of peach fuzz, but it's longer and thicker so it can be tough to see but it's rather substantial for such a short amount of time!

Just as predicted, weight is becoming an issue. The weight gain from the hormones is colliding with my weight loss efforts so I've been hovering between 285 and 290 all month. Kind of frustrating but at least it's not going up any more than that.

I have, however, lost 5 inches around my chest in total! Which means soon I'm going to need a new binder if I want it to actually work.

And as for the bathroom issues, I finally got that all resolved. Fed up, I sent an email to the HR person telling her that even federal law states that I don't need to prove my gender through any means. I actually got an apology in return and she said she understood. The next day I pushed passed my reservations and hesitations and have been exclusively using the men's room.

Great news!

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Quote from: thorhugs on May 15, 2016, 04:07:38 PM
I have, however, lost 5 inches around my chest in total! Which means soon I'm going to need a new binder if I want it to actually work.

And as for the bathroom issues, I finally got that all resolved. Fed up, I sent an email to the HR person telling her that even federal law states that I don't need to prove my gender through any means. I actually got an apology in return and she said she understood. The next day I pushed passed my reservations and hesitations and have been exclusively using the men's room.

That's the dream!

And great news about the bathrooms, always be pushy P: