Community Conversation => Transitioning => Real-Life Experience => Topic started by: Sspar on May 21, 2016, 05:40:05 PM Return to Full Version
Title: need advice about family and freinds..
Post by: Sspar on May 21, 2016, 05:40:05 PM
Post by: Sspar on May 21, 2016, 05:40:05 PM
Ok.. I am at the 1 yr mark for my RLE..
I kinda pass.. ( Till i open my mouth.. then all bets are off .. but that's a problem for another day )
Over all.. I am very lucky with Family ( married 30yrs.. 3 kids ) , friends and work...
Now for my problem..
it's relatively rare.. but if some one is rude or impolite too me in public.., and i am by myself..I can easily blow it off.. and lead a happy life..
But if i am with Famiy and freinds.. I have lots of anxiety and fear because i want to protect them from those same impolite and rude people.. But in reality.. I can't..
How do you folks deal with this issue ??
Thanks for any help, thoughts, or advice
Steph
I kinda pass.. ( Till i open my mouth.. then all bets are off .. but that's a problem for another day )
Over all.. I am very lucky with Family ( married 30yrs.. 3 kids ) , friends and work...
Now for my problem..
it's relatively rare.. but if some one is rude or impolite too me in public.., and i am by myself..I can easily blow it off.. and lead a happy life..
But if i am with Famiy and freinds.. I have lots of anxiety and fear because i want to protect them from those same impolite and rude people.. But in reality.. I can't..
How do you folks deal with this issue ??
Thanks for any help, thoughts, or advice
Steph
Title: Re: need advice about family and freinds..
Post by: Ms Grace on May 21, 2016, 05:50:19 PM
Post by: Ms Grace on May 21, 2016, 05:50:19 PM
Fortunately I haven't had this come up as an issue. How about you talk with your family - don't presume they are fragile eggs, they might be more than able to withstand the trolls and morons.
Title: Re: need advice about family and freinds..
Post by: cindianna_jones on May 21, 2016, 06:07:55 PM
Post by: cindianna_jones on May 21, 2016, 06:07:55 PM
My family couldn't deal with me during that time. I moved to another state. It may or not have been a bad decision, but I did get out on my own. I found my own family and friends here.
Now, most of my family is on board. Some aren't. They deal. We get along fine.
They aren't going to change who you are. Only you can do that. So do your best to explain your situation to them. Be nice. Don't get mad. Don't explode. You are living your life. Don't let them live it for you.
Now, most of my family is on board. Some aren't. They deal. We get along fine.
They aren't going to change who you are. Only you can do that. So do your best to explain your situation to them. Be nice. Don't get mad. Don't explode. You are living your life. Don't let them live it for you.
Title: Re: need advice about family and freinds..
Post by: Sspar on May 21, 2016, 06:09:25 PM
Post by: Sspar on May 21, 2016, 06:09:25 PM
No.. I know there not fragile eggs.. And I have talked to (some ) them about the possibility of these things happening..
I just don't like feeling of not being able protect them..
living in a conservative rural area.. There are no local transgenders that i can talk with or use as support.. My therapist recommends that I start using you wonderful online folks and draw from your thoughts and experiences..
Just to verify.. my family and friends are being supportive.. I just don't want them to get embarrassed when they are with me in public.. and I know it's there issue and not mine.. I just don't like these things being beyond my controll..
(I only want joy and happiness for those around me :) )
Steph..
I just don't like feeling of not being able protect them..
living in a conservative rural area.. There are no local transgenders that i can talk with or use as support.. My therapist recommends that I start using you wonderful online folks and draw from your thoughts and experiences..
Just to verify.. my family and friends are being supportive.. I just don't want them to get embarrassed when they are with me in public.. and I know it's there issue and not mine.. I just don't like these things being beyond my controll..
(I only want joy and happiness for those around me :) )
Steph..
Title: Re: need advice about family and freinds..
Post by: Denise on May 23, 2016, 11:38:05 AM
Post by: Denise on May 23, 2016, 11:38:05 AM
My guess is they would be mad at the jerk and embarrassed for you and would be most worried about your reaction.
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