Community Conversation => Transitioning => Coming out of the closet => Topic started by: amberctm on January 20, 2006, 08:26:38 PM Return to Full Version
Title: My dad knows!!
Post by: amberctm on January 20, 2006, 08:26:38 PM
Post by: amberctm on January 20, 2006, 08:26:38 PM
Well, my dad knows. My mother told him...I think yesterday. Anyway I tokk my kids up to my parents house for dinner tonight because my wife is out of town. When the kids were done and my mother was clearing the table, my dad turned to me and said I know, your mom told me. I was BLOWN OFF my seat. I did not ever expect that, mom didn't even warn me! Then he started to say that he supports me in what ever decision I make. He said it must have been hard to go 27 years with that secret and that I had accomplished alot despite this. I gave him the longest hug I have ever given him im my whole life. As I sat there I could see the tears welling up in his eyes and for that very second I felt the connection I have always longed for, the metiphorical gate hade opened. Finnaly I am alowwed to be ME!
I really wasn't prepaired but I told him that I was doing just fine and thats is why I was accually going to counseling. I also told him that I have a ton of info that I've been collecting to giveto them.
I just never imagined that it would go this well!
Amber
I really wasn't prepaired but I told him that I was doing just fine and thats is why I was accually going to counseling. I also told him that I have a ton of info that I've been collecting to giveto them.
I just never imagined that it would go this well!
Amber
Title: Re: My dad knows!!
Post by: stephanie_craxford on January 20, 2006, 09:12:06 PM
Post by: stephanie_craxford on January 20, 2006, 09:12:06 PM
Quote from: amberctm on January 20, 2006, 08:26:38 PM
...I also told him that I have a ton of info that I've been collecting to giveto them.
I just never imagined that it would go this well!
Amber
That's great news Amber,
I imagine that you are feeling on top of the world right now. It's does make it easier the more people you tell. However don't overwhelm them with the "Ton of info". Go slow and feed them what they want to know. There may be no need to go into in depth explanations, unless you are sure that is what they want to know.
Relish the moment, they can be few and far between.
Steph
Title: Re: My dad knows!!
Post by: Kimberly on January 20, 2006, 09:36:08 PM
Post by: Kimberly on January 20, 2006, 09:36:08 PM
I am very happy for you Amber... cherish the moments (=
As far as information overload goes... what Steph said (=
As far as information overload goes... what Steph said (=
Title: Re: My dad knows!!
Post by: Sara on January 20, 2006, 10:15:20 PM
Post by: Sara on January 20, 2006, 10:15:20 PM
Amber, you are so lucky, my dad pasted away before I could tell him and you have had given to you what I have always wanted "acceptance, love and support from my dad" cherish the moment every day with him and tell him you love him every chance you get because he will not be here forever.
A girl needs her dad.
Sara.
A girl needs her dad.
Sara.
Title: Re: My dad knows!!
Post by: Cassandra on January 20, 2006, 11:22:46 PM
Post by: Cassandra on January 20, 2006, 11:22:46 PM
That's really great Amber. I'm really happy for you. I could feel some tears welling up as I read your post. Yes, do be careful with the information overload thing. There is such a thing as too much information.
Big Hug,
Cassie
Big Hug,
Cassie
Title: Re: My dad knows!!
Post by: Chaunte on January 20, 2006, 11:48:05 PM
Post by: Chaunte on January 20, 2006, 11:48:05 PM
Amber,
That is absolutely wonderful news! Savor the moment!
Chaunte
That is absolutely wonderful news! Savor the moment!
Chaunte
Title: Re: My dad knows!!
Post by: stephanie on January 21, 2006, 12:02:41 AM
Post by: stephanie on January 21, 2006, 12:02:41 AM
Congratulations! It's great to have family standing behind you.
Title: Re: My dad knows!!
Post by: Shelley on January 21, 2006, 05:18:30 AM
Post by: Shelley on January 21, 2006, 05:18:30 AM
I am so happy for you Amber your Dad sounds fantastic.
Hugs Shelley
Hugs Shelley
Title: Re: My dad knows!!
Post by: Peggiann on January 21, 2006, 10:25:47 AM
Post by: Peggiann on January 21, 2006, 10:25:47 AM
Amber what a Fantastic moment in time to refecked on. I so glad for you.
I agree on the information overload. Let them ask the questions and share what is appropriate. This is a link here at Susan's that is so touching. I don't know if you've seen it. It may help you understand a lot of thoughts that could go through their minds as parents.
http://www.familyacceptance.com/images/index/fa6_12.jpg
You might share Susan's Place at some point and time too. It maybe easier than they asking for information to be able to seek it here at thier own pace and in private.
Smiles,
Peggiann
I agree on the information overload. Let them ask the questions and share what is appropriate. This is a link here at Susan's that is so touching. I don't know if you've seen it. It may help you understand a lot of thoughts that could go through their minds as parents.
http://www.familyacceptance.com/images/index/fa6_12.jpg
You might share Susan's Place at some point and time too. It maybe easier than they asking for information to be able to seek it here at thier own pace and in private.
Smiles,
Peggiann
Title: Re: My dad knows!!
Post by: molly on January 21, 2006, 12:16:12 PM
Post by: molly on January 21, 2006, 12:16:12 PM
Amber, I am so happy for you, what a wonderful outcome. Enjoy, no savor, the moment!
To have acceptance by your family is a blessing.
Molly
To have acceptance by your family is a blessing.
Molly
Title: Re: My dad knows!!
Post by: Joseph on January 21, 2006, 02:42:51 PM
Post by: Joseph on January 21, 2006, 02:42:51 PM
Quote from: amberctm on January 20, 2006, 08:26:38 PM
Finnaly I am alowwed to be ME!
Congrats!! I was a basketcase when I told my parents and I know the relief you're talking about. Now I don't have to worry about explaining myself and it keeps me from being extremely grumpy around them too. Hope your relationship with your parents only improves from here. :)
Joseph
Title: Re: My dad knows!!
Post by: amberctm on January 21, 2006, 06:15:19 PM
Post by: amberctm on January 21, 2006, 06:15:19 PM
Thank you all for your kind words. :) I know that there will be days for him (or anyone else) that go great and some days when they can't jseem to understand. It's a process
As far as info over load; much thanks for the reminder. I think I may start with the PFLAG booklet "Our Tran-Children." Its pretty basic and doesn't go into extream details. My wife accually wrote a ten page paper on transexualism for a class that she took. And emailed to everyone in the family to read, including the ones who don't know yet. I think that it may have opened a lot of doors for some people. By way We are both fulltime students.
Again, thanks for your kind words,
Amber
As far as info over load; much thanks for the reminder. I think I may start with the PFLAG booklet "Our Tran-Children." Its pretty basic and doesn't go into extream details. My wife accually wrote a ten page paper on transexualism for a class that she took. And emailed to everyone in the family to read, including the ones who don't know yet. I think that it may have opened a lot of doors for some people. By way We are both fulltime students.
Again, thanks for your kind words,
Amber