Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Title's question. Anyways, I'm getting kind of sick of it. I'm always hearing stuff about bathrooms on the news, discussions about trans people, etc. I plan on coming out in a few years time, but I don't want to do it during the climax of trans-panic/anti trans-panic, that's just asking for trouble. How many years will it take for trans people to not be such a hot topic in the media? Five years? Ten years? Even more than that? What do you think? 

The public has a short attention span and I suspect in a year or two, some time after the presidential elections are over, things will calm down. I suspect it may get worst before it gets better so prepare for a bumpy ride for a bit.

Quote from: MisterQueer on May 25, 2016, 05:52:41 PM
Title's question. Anyways, I'm getting kind of sick of it. I'm always hearing stuff about bathrooms on the news, discussions about trans people, etc. I plan on coming out in a few years time, but I don't want to do it during the climax of trans-panic/anti trans-panic, that's just asking for trouble. How many years will it take for trans people to not be such a hot topic in the media? Five years? Ten years? Even more than that? What do you think?

Yes. It will calm down. This is the death throes of a generation that seeks to control conformity. Younger folk tend to be more tolerant of diversity. Ten years from now we'll be shocked that acceptance wasn't always a given.

To some extent it depends on us. If we make an effort to educate people who we are, people will be quicker to get used to us. If we don't it will take longer.

There is a segment of the population for whom it will never die.  What we can hope for is that the Federal Government will follow through with their threat and make them feel enough pain that they learn to attend to themselves instead of everybody else.

I imagine that within 18 months this will have faded into the background.  But it will probably be another generation before its forgotten entirely.


Sapere Aude

After the US election?

I suspect like marriage equality, it will get noisy for a while and then go away. The prejudice and phobia will be around a while.

Marriage equality has hardly faded away in the US.  Kin Davis is recent news.  So is the Alabama Supreme Court Chief Justice.


Sapere Aude

True but the response from the regressives is pretty anemic and laughed at my the mainstream.

It is what is spawning all the religious freedom bills in so many states.  And what is mainstream is very different in different sections of the country.  Mainstream here is the Southern Baptists.


Sapere Aude

I think it really depends where you are. I think it will calm down faster in Canada (where I live) than in the US. I'm kind of expecting it to be calm here by the end of this year with general social acceptance following within the next 5 years.

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Quote from: suzifrommd on May 25, 2016, 06:07:30 PM
Yes. It will calm down. This is the death throes of a generation that seeks to control conformity. Younger folk tend to be more tolerant of diversity. Ten years from now we'll be shocked that acceptance wasn't always a given.

To some extent it depends on us. If we make an effort to educate people who we are, people will be quicker to get used to us. If we don't it will take longer.

I agree.

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It's also going to depend on who wins the White House as that will set the direction of the Supreme Court for a generation.


Sapere Aude

Yeah I think the election stuff is what's drumming up most of the attention. Hopefully it will die down afterwards.

I spent my whole life avoiding confrontation, except for my time in the military. I came out just as this was escalating and I did it because of the hate I was seeing online from my own friends about trans people. I actually jumped into the confrontation of my own free will. Most of my friends changed their tune when I did that. The ones that didn't are no longer friends.

It's still a little frightening to know I'm walking around with a giant bullseye on my back. Not just any bullseye. Not one that a few random people are aiming at. One that multiple governments are aiming at. But I can't stay on the sidelines and watch my only path to happiness be torched. And I never would have had the courage to combat this if I wasn't out yet.

Personally I think more people need to find that courage at this particular moment in time. The people that would change their tunes if they knew someone personally that was trans, never will if that person doesn't come out to them. In the meantime those people are on board against us when they could be an ally instead.

It's easier today than it ever was in the past, but it's also scarier because now people are actually looking for us. I still wouldn't change the decision I made though. I'm happier than I ever was in my life despite current politics. It's a tough decision though. I'm not sure if I could have made it if I had waited until now to do it.

Quote from: arice on May 25, 2016, 06:33:40 PM
I think it really depends where you are. I think it will calm down faster in Canada (where I live) than in the US. I'm kind of expecting it to be calm here by the end of this year with general social acceptance following within the next 5 years.

I agree with you. I'm in the US and I think a lot of this controversy was created by marriage equality all throughout the country 11 months ago. And Canada, if I'm not mistaken, legalized same-sex marriage all throughout the country in 2005. Since the conservative politicians in the US realized they lost the fight to gay rights, they moved onto the next group: the trans community.

Quote from: MisterQueer on May 25, 2016, 06:52:21 PM
I agree with you. I'm in the US and I think a lot of this controversy was created by marriage equality all throughout the country 11 months ago. And Canada, if I'm not mistaken, legalized same-sex marriage all throughout the country in 2005. Since the conservative politicians in the US realized they lost the fight to gay rights, they moved onto the next group: the trans community.

Yes. We legalized gay marriage in 2005 and the opposition to it died quickly (within a year or two in most places). The current backlash against our recent transgender protections reminds me of that but if anything, it feels like it will be over faster since the antitrans activists here come of looking more like lunatics than the homophobes did a decade ago.

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It really all depends on who wins the Presidential election. If Bernie Sanders or that other democratic candidate wins, things will be solidified for the better...

BUT if Trumpy Mc Drumph rigs the election, things could get much worse. Regardless of if he is merely drumming up more of the dummy vote or not, he has made his intentions clear to reverse ALL of the progress the Obama Administration has done, and then some. There is potential for things to get as bad for us as they were for people of color during the Civil Rights Movements (CRM) of the 60s-70s, like instead of places having "no n****s" signs, there would be "no queers" signs... I wouldn't be surprised if he even proposes some sort of "Mutant Queer Registration Act."

However, for any of us that have fought long and hard to get this far through the personal trials and unrelenting adversity we've all faced, I don't think many of us would go quietly. They only have to win once to ruin a whole lot of progress, but we have to keep fighting to keep things from repeating history. With certain State "governments" now taking sides with the likes of the twits of the AFA, WBC, and now even the KooKoo Klans that fuel the fires against Equality, it begs an interesting question based on if things get that far: the CRM had Black Panthers... would our movement have Pink Panthers? ;) :P

So, it's imperative that EVERYONE on here that is or knows someone in the USA gets their votes in for the best interests of the United States.

Quote from: MisterQueer on May 25, 2016, 05:52:41 PM
Title's question. Anyways, I'm getting kind of sick of it. I'm always hearing stuff about bathrooms on the news, discussions about trans people, etc. I plan on coming out in a few years time, but I don't want to do it during the climax of trans-panic/anti trans-panic, that's just asking for trouble. How many years will it take for trans people to not be such a hot topic in the media? Five years? Ten years? Even more than that? What do you think?

You should come out when you're comfortable don't get me wrong but i have came out and so far
i haven't gotten that much negativity besides a couple smart remarks form people. But then again i live in a small area. I guess it depends but i wouldn't be to concerned. ^.^
Anyways, i don't know when it will calm down and i won't lie i may not be sure when but almost always they'll be people dislike something or not understanding something weather its about us or something else.
I bet it may go on for a while but i think its going to slow down soon after everything on the news related to it comes to a halt, so my guess is it won't go on for very much longer but i think we'll always have some amount of
ignorance in the world. I told my friend today i was scared of that and she told me they'll always be jerks but
like she told me just be yourself :) it'll be okay you'll meet good people along the line.
Plus i'm pretty sure support out does a lot of the negativity, in other words i could bet we have more support in this world along with good respectful people then we do bad.  I doubt all of this will be a huge thing for long and i'm sure once everything passes over it'll all be good again :)

I think the term when hell freezes over when applied to a certain sector of society.

Look I've been living as openly trans for firty one years and post op for around thirty of them. In that time I've seen interest and hostility come and go, but interestingly, in America at least, it is now far worse than it was in the 1960's 1970's and 1980's.

My feeling is that things are reaching a head, and that there may soon be a moment of decicion, but that like Britains membership of the EU, there are some sections of society who will never accept it, and hence the issue will never really go away.

Gays are becoming main stream, but they are still used to tell people they will go to Hell. That sadly will always be there for some.

Quote from: Midnightstar on May 25, 2016, 11:36:52 PM
You should come out when you're comfortable don't get me wrong but i have came out and so far
i haven't gotten that much negativity besides a couple smart remarks form people.

Exactly... I'm not comfortable coming out right now because there is so much stigma and drama regarding trans people. Imagine your neighbor's house is on fire and you say to them, "Oh, just thought I should let you know, I own seven hundred lighters."... whilst lighters in themselves are not bad, the neighbor not going to think good thoughts about them while their house is on fire. I think it's best to wait until the neighbor's house is rebuilt and fixed to bring up that you have 700 lighters. They might look at you weirdly and say "Okay?" but they won't try and attack you.

Another reason that I am not comfortable coming out right now is because I am 15 and vulnerable to any forms of potential abuse. I don't think my parents would abuse me for being trans, they're not bad people, but I think they would be disappointed in me and feel like they've failed raising me, and overall that would wreck our relationship. My classmates could bully me for being trans if they found out, nobody here is openly queer due to the danger of being jumped/attack. Rural 'murica for you...

Quotethink the term when hell freezes over when applied to a certain sector of society.

I agree for the most part. I'm not saying transphobia will completely go away, that's just silly. There will always be transphobia, like there will always be racism, sexism, and homophobia. However, back in the 50's/60's, for example, POC rights were a huge issue, but of course, it passed. If a white person in 2016 were to share a public bathroom with a POC, then they usually wouldn't care. In 1950, however, bathrooms were race-segregated; if a POC entered a white bathroom then the white person would most likely be upset. There was huge stigma surrounding POC in the mid 20th century, but now there isn't. Trans stigma is no different. Here, in the early 21st century, there is controversy surrounding trans people. It will pass, that's for certain, I just personally don't know when. Of course there will be the occasional transphobe or transphobic group here and there, but trans panic/anti-trans panic will pass one day. I'd think "when hell freezes over" is a bit over the top, but to each their own.   

QuoteI've seen interest and hostility come and go, but interestingly, in America at least, it is now far worse than it was in the 1960's 1970's and 1980's.

The reason why America is becoming so hostile now is because the majority had no idea transgender people existed until recent years, and now that they learned that we're real, they're scared and reacting with hostility.

Quotehere are some sections of society who will never accept it, and hence the issue will never really go away.

Yes, it will never completely go away, hence why I used the term 'calm down' in the title instead of 'go away'. Like I said before there will always be transphobia, just like racism, sexism, etc, etc, the list goes on.

" I'd think "when hell freezes over" is a bit over the top, but to each their own." Well for most of society it might just go the way of the Hula Hoop, but for that certain section that will remain nameless it will literally  be when Hell freezes over.

Quote from: veritatemfurto on May 25, 2016, 10:58:56 PM
It really all depends on who wins the Presidential election. If Bernie Sanders or that other democratic candidate wins, things will be solidified for the better...

LOL I find it too funny some cannot even say "her" name!! I'd love to see Bernie chosen as Trump's VP and then perhaps we can finally put all this 'two party' hypocrisy to rest!!

The term 'useful idiocy' comes to mind.

Nobody is losing sleep over where gay & trans people pee this is really about State's rights VS Federal power ya'll can stuff 'federal funding' we'll keep yer 'tax dollars' in the first place!!!

QuoteAustin-area schools say they already accommodate transgender students

Was wondering the same thing. I was planning on starting HRT by the end of this year, but after seeing how bad things are getting I'm considering trying to hold off a little longer.

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I can't speak for all areas, but in my area there are almost no problems. The news makes it sound like the end of the world, but it's rare I run into anything that would actually scare me. I'm in the northeast though. I wouldn't want to be in the south right now.

I honestly hope it will not calm down too quickly. Stigma comes before acceptance but after denial. At least the media are talking about it, many people don't even know the definition of transgender.

Let's not be alarmist either and scare people when they don't need to be scared. There are vast swaths of this country that are not North Carolina, Mississippi or Texas. Even if you head to the major cities in those states, you will find an immense amount of support for human rights.

Much of the division in this nation is between rural people and urban people. It's complex and there is manipulation of everyone.

Civil rights struggles always have struggles, regressions and moments of violence even. We are an oligarchy leaning democracy by and large and diversity is important for business. Too many problems and the corporations step in as we have seen.

The summer of 1968 saw riots at the Democratic convention. We are probably in another one of those years. Don't be afraid, we are on the moral side and we will prevail.

Quote from: MisterQueer on May 25, 2016, 05:52:41 PM
Title's question. Anyways, I'm getting kind of sick of it. I'm always hearing stuff about bathrooms on the news, discussions about trans people, etc. I plan on coming out in a few years time, but I don't want to do it during the climax of trans-panic/anti trans-panic, that's just asking for trouble. How many years will it take for trans people to not be such a hot topic in the media? Five years? Ten years? Even more than that? What do you think?

Society will give all transgender people the same respect everyone else gets....about two years after the transgender community gives all transgender people the same respect they want.

Hugs, Devlyn

I think it's gonna take about a decade for trans people to be truly accepted, but it's within reach. I wouldn't hold off on transitioning because of the social and political climate though. You do what you gotta do for you.

Attention in the media?

I think that things will subside after the Supreme Court rules on a case. That won't happen until after the election. If the conservatives win, we will lose because the court will get a spanking new fundamentalist judge. It could take another election cycle at the very least to change that, assuming only one judge gets assigned to the bench. The thing is, there are some old judges currently serving. It is possible that the next president could put three justices on the court. That could set our cause back by a generation.

Equal rights for us depend greatly on this election, far more so than in any other election. So please, vote.

As far as society in general is concerned, religious fundamentalism is currently on the rise around the world. It spans Christianity, Judaism, and Islam. It isn't about religion. It is about proud ignorance, hubris, and power. This is a cyclic thing... sort of like a pendulum that swings back and forth. But I can't think of a time when the whole world seems to have entered into the fray at once like this. I watch the news and am fascinated at how witliessness is on the rise everywhere. Why are people so proud to be stupid?

Religious fundamentalism is the reaction of people who cannot come to terms with the fact that "God is Dead."  They are trying to reanimate the corpse left by the exponential expansion of knowledge that has occurred since the mid 19th century.


Sapere Aude

It's unfortunate that people find time in their lives to hate, but people are people. I am not exempt from this. My older brother represents hate at its purest with statements such as, "The youth of this country is destroying the nation." He represents the 'older' hateful generation and when legislation is passed it takes people to change the world we live in. Time will fix the problem and people are becoming more accepting. We have to take time to educate people and let than know that we are no more sexually deviant then they are.

Quote from: Devlyn Marie on May 26, 2016, 12:16:46 PM
Society will give all transgender people the same respect everyone else gets....about two years after the transgender community gives all transgender people the same respect they want.

Hugs, Devlyn

Thanks, Devlyn.  Yeah, I've noticed that...  >:(  Equal means equal for everyone.

Coincidentally enough, I woke up this morning to find the newspaper on my table. The main article? "The ignorance of transgender jokes" along with several bathroom signs on top of the heading. While it is a pro-trans rights article, it just goes to prove my point about how we're such a hot topic in the media right now. The amount of unnecessary drama that taking place is very frustrating.

Quote from: Kiera on May 26, 2016, 04:33:13 AM
LOL I find it too funny some cannot even say "her" name!! I'd love to see Bernie chosen as Trump's VP and then perhaps we can finally put all this 'two party' hypocrisy to rest!!

HAH! nooo, I can say Hillary Diane Rodham Clinton all day, I just don't think she is the best choice for my party if we want progress for the trans community sooner rather than later. I'll still vote for her if she does get the nomination, but given all the political crap on and off the record that's happened involving her since Bill's run for president in 1992, including support for and defense of DADT and DOMA (http://www.advocate.com/election/2015/10/23/hillary-clinton-supports-her-husbands-defensive-action-president), I am more inclined to think she will put addressing our problems on the back burner once again, instead of finishing the issue. But despite that, I really want to see whoever is the runner up in the DNC turn out to be the nominee's VP. If Hillary and Bernie can just get over their differences and join forces, that would make it a landslide for votes against Donny McDrumph. It wouldn't be the first time they have worked together... (http://redalertpolitics.com/2016/03/14/hillary-bernie-1994-bernie-fans-behind-literally/)
Debating her merits any further should be left to the politics section of the forum, as per the TOS.

Quote from: Kiera on May 26, 2016, 04:33:13 AM
The term 'useful idiocy' comes to mind.

Nobody is losing sleep over where gay & trans people pee this is really about State's rights VS Federal power ya'll can stuff 'federal funding' we'll keep yer 'tax dollars' in the first place!!!

The only "useful idiocy" going on is if you think that this bathroom issue is just that clear cut... It's not.  It's much much more than that. I'm not losing any sleep over which bathroom to use, but bathrooms are only the tip of the iceberg that makes up the problems for trans people regardless of whether we are pre, post, non-op, or just aspiring dragsters. Bathrooms and locker rooms are just the easiest thing for people to latch onto because in public stalls, we ALL are at our most vulnerable- separated from strangers with our panties down only by a loosely fitted "door" and a simple metal rectangle for a lock. We've all seen it- stall doors that are a lame excuse for privacy when you can literally stick your finger through the openings while shut and see who's outside waiting for the next stall to open hoping that the last person that was in there had the decency to flush and not sprinkle the seat or make a mess of "confetti" all over the place.

That is why a lot of people would rather prefer the unisex stalls, because they're places that actually have a conventional door and knob that can be locked like our own wash rooms at home. But all it takes is one misplaced glance through those cracked doors for someone to have their mind go "wait, did i see what i think i saw" and then back up to take another more intentional look that will lead to rumors being spread that can (and do) cost us our jobs if it happens at work, and sometimes even continuing on to the point where it could end with us getting hurt or killed because people think we lied about who we are when we are really only trying to make amends for not being true to ourselves. It's not the glance that kills us, it's the snowball effect from rumors about our most private privates.

Need I remind you that we've already had a record number of deaths in the U.S. last year at 21. Those are just the known cases, never mind the dozens more that are still listed as "missing," or simply dismissed the victim's crossdressing as a side note using their assigned sex, while forgetting the cases in other parts of the world. That number may unfortunately be surpassed this year with 10 already in the ground. (http://www.advocate.com/transgender/2016/5/16/these-are-trans-people-killed-2016) Crimes may not be happening in the bathrooms, but they certainly can start there against us. Enough of us have already been victims.

Mahalo.