Community Conversation => Transgender talk => Topic started by: Foxtran on August 02, 2016, 10:48:33 PM Return to Full Version
Title: I finally came out to my girlfriend
Post by: Foxtran on August 02, 2016, 10:48:33 PM
Post by: Foxtran on August 02, 2016, 10:48:33 PM
So its been a while since I have been here or posted anything, been busy preping for college and getting a job and all that boring grown up stuff. I have been in a relationship with someone for a good while now and this person was the one that almost pointed out to me I was transgender, she didnt actually point it out but she always liked to poke fun of my more feminine side and she also always wanted to see me crossdress. Because of all this and after think about a great many things I had eventually come to the conclusion that I was at least genderfluid. So after realizing this I wanted to talk to her about it but everytime I tried i would have a nervous breakdown and not be able to. Well last night I came up with a solution, not the best one but the only one that would let me finally be able to tell her, I wrote up a big paragraph and sent it to her over the steam instant messenger when she wasnt online, like i said, not the best solution. Well I just got on, saw I had 12 messages, every single one from her and pretty much died, but after reading them, I couldn't be happier, yes she is a bit confused and would have preferred that i told her in person but she totally understood. Its like a huge weight has been lifted from my shoulders, yes theres still a ways to go but her understanding and being totally cool with all of it has helped so much. So yea, I guess I thought I would share, needed someone to tell and my sisters asleep and this community even in the relatively small time I have been a part of it has always been so helpful and supportive.
O a little side note, some of you may know this already, but Brezzy otherwise known as Kuledu3 on youtube is only a couple weeks away from getting srs surgery, she paid for it last week and now is just waiting for the date so go give her some support, the "friendly" people of twitter sure havnt been.
O a little side note, some of you may know this already, but Brezzy otherwise known as Kuledu3 on youtube is only a couple weeks away from getting srs surgery, she paid for it last week and now is just waiting for the date so go give her some support, the "friendly" people of twitter sure havnt been.
Title: I finally came out to my girlfriend
Post by: Steph7 on August 02, 2016, 10:59:12 PM
Post by: Steph7 on August 02, 2016, 10:59:12 PM
I am glad you managed to get it out there.
Do you feel better or worse for sharing this with her?
I know when I came out to my wife I was in two frames of mind. On one hand I was glad that I finally got it out (while not saying anything I felt like I was lying to her all the time) but on the other hand my issues were now hers to deal with too.
I hope she gives you the support and love you need.
Take care
Steff
Do you feel better or worse for sharing this with her?
I know when I came out to my wife I was in two frames of mind. On one hand I was glad that I finally got it out (while not saying anything I felt like I was lying to her all the time) but on the other hand my issues were now hers to deal with too.
I hope she gives you the support and love you need.
Take care
Steff
Title: Re: I finally came out to my girlfriend
Post by: Obfuskatie on August 03, 2016, 01:09:03 AM
Post by: Obfuskatie on August 03, 2016, 01:09:03 AM
Congrats!
Hugs,
- Katie
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Hugs,
- Katie
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: I finally came out to my girlfriend
Post by: LilDevilOfPrada on August 03, 2016, 03:48:41 AM
Post by: LilDevilOfPrada on August 03, 2016, 03:48:41 AM
Over steam :o.
Haha thats quite funny. Lord Gaben helps all it seems. Also I am glad its off to a good start.
Haha thats quite funny. Lord Gaben helps all it seems. Also I am glad its off to a good start.
Title: Re: I finally came out to my girlfriend
Post by: Foxtran on August 03, 2016, 01:15:13 PM
Post by: Foxtran on August 03, 2016, 01:15:13 PM
Quote from: dazedAndConfused01 on August 02, 2016, 10:59:12 PM
I am glad you managed to get it out there.
Do you feel better or worse for sharing this with her?
I know when I came out to my wife I was in two frames of mind. On one hand I was glad that I finally got it out (while not saying anything I felt like I was lying to her all the time) but on the other hand my issues were now hers to deal with too.
I hope she gives you the support and love you need.
Take care
Steff
It definitely helped, like I said she is a bit confused as to her this seems to have come out of nowhere and she does have some questions, but she said that she is complacently supportive of whatever I choose to do
Title: Re: I finally came out to my girlfriend
Post by: KathyLauren on August 03, 2016, 01:50:14 PM
Post by: KathyLauren on August 03, 2016, 01:50:14 PM
Congratulations! Coming out to one' partner is probably the hardest thing to do. I am glad it went well for you.
Title: Re: I finally came out to my girlfriend
Post by: Reyes on August 04, 2016, 04:31:07 PM
Post by: Reyes on August 04, 2016, 04:31:07 PM
Congrats! :3 I'm happy it went well for you. :3
I'm sorry if this sounds at all rude, I'm actually curious about this subject, but, are the two of you going to stay together?
I've never had the courage to ask anyone that before, I mean, if someone's girlfriend is straight, and they come out as transgender to them, do they stay together? Cause your still the same person, just the version you were always meant to be, but at the same time, your a girl now, and she's straight, but-.. I dunno. I'm really sorry if I'm sounding like an idiot here.
I'm sorry if this sounds at all rude, I'm actually curious about this subject, but, are the two of you going to stay together?
I've never had the courage to ask anyone that before, I mean, if someone's girlfriend is straight, and they come out as transgender to them, do they stay together? Cause your still the same person, just the version you were always meant to be, but at the same time, your a girl now, and she's straight, but-.. I dunno. I'm really sorry if I'm sounding like an idiot here.
Title: Re: I finally came out to my girlfriend
Post by: Michelle_P on August 04, 2016, 08:49:39 PM
Post by: Michelle_P on August 04, 2016, 08:49:39 PM
Quote from: Reyes on August 04, 2016, 04:31:07 PM
Congrats! :3 I'm happy it went well for you. :3
I'm sorry if this sounds at all rude, I'm actually curious about this subject, but, are the two of you going to stay together?
I've never had the courage to ask anyone that before, I mean, if someone's girlfriend is straight, and they come out as transgender to them, do they stay together? Cause your still the same person, just the version you were always meant to be, but at the same time, your a girl now, and she's straight, but-.. I dunno. I'm really sorry if I'm sounding like an idiot here.
No, you're not sounding like an idiot. It's a really good question. There are some statistics for married folks when one partner comes out of the closet. Overall, about half the marriages end. For those of us who are older (60 and up, as I recall, might even be younger) about three-quarters of marriages end.
A straight woman who finds themselves moving from a heterosexual relationship to becoming a lesbian couple might not have the temperament or flexibility in their gender orientation to handle it, even when they know in their heart that it's still their partner, although with a different presentation. It's just how people are.
Title: Re: I finally came out to my girlfriend
Post by: Juliefin on August 04, 2016, 09:35:51 PM
Post by: Juliefin on August 04, 2016, 09:35:51 PM
Congrats! Telling someone, especially someone you care deeply about not knowing how they are going to react is one of the most difficult things. I would say that you're VERY VERY lucky and I hope you will treasure each other because that is really rare!
Title: Re: I finally came out to my girlfriend
Post by: Foxtran on August 04, 2016, 11:23:29 PM
Post by: Foxtran on August 04, 2016, 11:23:29 PM
Quote from: Reyes on August 04, 2016, 04:31:07 PM
Congrats! :3 I'm happy it went well for you. :3
I'm sorry if this sounds at all rude, I'm actually curious about this subject, but, are the two of you going to stay together?
I've never had the courage to ask anyone that before, I mean, if someone's girlfriend is straight, and they come out as transgender to them, do they stay together? Cause your still the same person, just the version you were always meant to be, but at the same time, your a girl now, and she's straight, but-.. I dunno. I'm really sorry if I'm sounding like an idiot here.
We would be but currently she is a bit younger than me so she is still in high school but im going to college, once she has graduated than yes we will be. Funny thing though, when I was talking to her again today i thanked her for not freaking out and being so supportive, and she got all mushy and stuff but than she said "just want to say though, why did you have to go and make me question my sexuality, i was the straightest person i knew", this was all in a very joking voice. So I guess and answer to "I mean, if someone's girlfriend is straight, and they come out as transgender to them, do they stay together?" would be its different for every relationship, im lucky to have a girlfriend who dosnt care whether im male or female, she loves me for who I am and will support me no matter what i do.