Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Hi everyone! I'm a transgirl who will be starting hormones relatively soon. I've been told that hormones can affect sexuality. I'm bisexual, but mostly am attracted to women. Is it really that probable that in a couple years I might be more interested in men? I don't really want that... it's definitely not enough of an issue to make me not want HRT, but I figured I would ask to see how much it matters.

QuoteHow does HRT affect sexuality?

It doesn't. Not one bit - and there's no science to support the idea that it does.

Welcome to Susan's Place. There are cases where sexual attraction flip after starting HRT but thats because the person was bisexual before HRT. If you read the site very much you will discover may MtFs who are doing everything they can to remain married to their SO. I don't think this is anything you will need to worry about.

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Hi Mikayla,

My sexuality did not change. I accepted and my wife found out my sexuality. I am very attracted sexually to guys; however, I could have sex with a woman. I could have sex with a woman 1.5 years ago but now I do not think it would function.

There are issues we can control and others we cannot.  A perfect example is how you feel about being a transgirl - is that a choice or.....?  While there are many things one can control in his or her transition, accept that there are things you'll have to wait to discover along the path.

As a wise Sensei once said - "Patience, grasshopper............when you can take these pebbles from my hand, it will be time for you to leave".

It would be easy for me to say it had, but in reality it did not. I've always had fantasies of being a woman sexually with a man. When I did my transition experiments back in my early 20's, the reality of it was not like the fantasy. A great reason on top of others I had for stopping the experiment.

In my teens with raging hormones it was easy for me to conflate my attraction to women, the envy, with sexual desire. There was a ton of visual appeal towards women that there never was to males. I know far better now what that appeal was. I also know all too scarily well how much more visual appeal men have, and then some, to me. Even scarier, how much less sexual desire I have towards my wife. TBH - A husband with nicer boobs then hers doesn't do a lot for her either, but....

It hasn't changed mine even a little bit.

I still feel exactly the same which is kind of ambiguous.

My sexuality remains the same as it has always been.  I was never attracted to just men or women...instead I am attracted to a person irrespective of their gender identity or sexual preference.  I enjoy being with my partner and our intimate relations are outstanding, not just sexual either.  She is CIS female and accepts me for me.

To be fair, I am a bit down on guys.  One thing that has changed is my perception of things spoken...I am more in tune with how crass or callous a comment can be and watching guys say things obliviously brought me to wonder if I could ever be truly in a relationship with one.  I recognize that my statement is about the overall package and not just the sex.

Quote from: kaitylynn on August 13, 2016, 08:06:43 AM
To be fair, I am a bit down on guys.  One thing that has changed is my perception of things spoken...I am more in tune with how crass or callous a comment can be and watching guys say things obliviously brought me to wonder if I could ever be truly in a relationship with one.  I recognize that my statement is about the overall package and not just the sex.

Having been a chameleon, being around guys when they don't have to be PC, I know all to well what they say, think and maybe even truly are. To be fair, how much peer-pressure leads to guys trying to out-idiot the other? I suspect a lot. All my life I preferred hanging with the girls just because of this.

Thanks to having had female friends as well as a few real guy-friends, that did let their guards down, I cannot fully buy into the "All Men Are Scum" mantra of a few girlfriends. "All", except for me for some odd reason  :o and, in time, some special guy they found

Before I started HRT, I had zero interest in guys romantically.  I was strictly interested in women. The idea of being with a man bordered on repulsive.  Now, I notice guys, I find them interesting, and I like their attention.  While I don't think I'm ready for any kind of sexual encounter yet (I'm pre-op), I can definitely imagine it happening.  Obviously, something is changing in me.

As I have posted elsewhere, I still think it is true that HRT does not change your sexuality.  It just broadens it a bit. :)

With kindness,

Terri

I found mine changing.  That was a surprise to me.

What is supported in the scientific literature is that early - onset trans people both ftm and mtf are more likely to be gay-identified prior to transition, and keep primary attraction so more likely to be hetero identified after transition. Conversely, late-onset trans people are more likely to be hetero identified before, gay after.

That holds up pretty well in my experience, but certainly not 100%.

There are girls (and I assume guys tho I don't know any) who wind up relatively hetero-identified before and after, so yes what you ask does happen. I assume there are also some who find they're gay or lesbian both before and after.

Anecdotally, this has been a surprising change for the people involved. It's something I've wondered about also and would consider a negative outcome.

While nominally bisexual, I'm quite mistrustful of men and also quite sexist toward them. I very definitely do not want to change my orientation and yet knowing others have experienced that leads me to be prepared for the possibility.

Now that I'm on a viable path to transition, I'm also able to imagine sex with a neovagina - before I decided and then started hrt, imaging that was just too painful and so I've contented myself with occasional penetrative anal from my GF and while the opportunity hasn't presented itself I've been open to trying that with a guy (anecdotally the real thing has more pleasure potential than a strap on).

In all of my sexual experience it's been extremely rare that I can simply feel feminine in the moment of orgasm, think maybe twice in 20 years of knowing I'm trans. I'm not good at suspension of disbelief.

That's changed a lot under HRT, I don't even think that's due to the estrogen, rather seeing a path forward it no longer hurts to imagine vaginal sex. That's included more ideation around sex with men. I can't double blind this, knowing it's an issue for me, the thoughts could as well be need to explore where I'll wind up as anything due to the HRT itself.

So I may be shifting that way but for me I strongly suspect it's  more in my head than in the hormones.

I am pre-HRT, so I don't really know what it is going to do to me.  I am strongly attracted to women, and if that changes, it will be a surprise.

However, I am happily married, all the more so since I came out, as my wife has demonstrated amazing loyalty and support for my transition.  Which means that, even though I notice other women and like what I see, I don't act on it.  So if my orientation changes and I find myself noticing men and liking what I see, I simply won't act on that either.  Nothing really changes.  My attraction to my wife is based on a lot more than sex, and that will not change.

I've heard from a few trans people that their sexuality changed.

I also just did a brief search for scientific research and found one paper that asked 115 trans people about their sexuality.  About 1 in 3 trans women and 1 in 5 trans men reported their sexuality changing.

Hope that helps!