Community Conversation => Transitioning => Gender Correction Surgery => Topic started by: rosiecv on October 09, 2016, 04:42:57 AM Return to Full Version

Title: I am so scared
Post by: rosiecv on October 09, 2016, 04:42:57 AM
I am having srs in about three weeks. So many people are telling me ( and i am reading from forums, etc.) that the surgery isn't that realistic and my new vagina will not be anatomically correct. I am so scared and i cannot sleep. Will me new vagina be at least an adequate substitution for a natal one or should i just give up hope? :(
Title: Re: I am so scared
Post by: LizK on October 09, 2016, 05:17:39 AM
Quote from: rosiecv on October 09, 2016, 04:42:57 AM
I am having srs in about three weeks. So many people are telling me ( and i am reading from forums, etc.) that the surgery isn't that realistic and my new vagina will not be anatomically correct. I am so scared and i cannot sleep. Will me new vagina be at least an adequate substitution for a natal one or should i just give up hope? :(

Hi Rosiecv

I am not at the, having surgery stage yet...probably another 18months 2 years so unfortunately I am not yet able to give you first hand experience. My understanding is, it depends on who the surgeon is and where the surgery is done. I have heard, like you, all sorts of things about different Dr's...who are you having your surgery with?, have you been able to find anyone who has used this surgeon before, if you have doubts, you do not have to have the surgery...even if you don't have doubts you still don't have to have the surgery...feeling the way you do what do you want to do about it? Maybe someone with experience might chime in here

Liz
Title: Re: I am so scared
Post by: Rachel on October 09, 2016, 10:31:33 AM
I am going to Dr. McGinn for GCS in a month. Check out her web site for GCS pictures. McGinn studied under Bowers. Both are excellent surgeons for GCS.

I am going to her because of her reputation.  I am very small and will need a graph for my vaginal canal and I will need vagioplasty afterwards because my scrotum will be needed for blood supply for the graph. When the graph is stable then vagioplasty will be done to make the labia.

Fear of the unknown is normal. Research the topic, have consultations with the Doctors and connect with people here that are going through and have gone through the process. There are a lot of surgeons, typical results and locations where GCS is performed.
Title: Re: I am so scared
Post by: Jenna Marie on October 09, 2016, 11:15:08 AM
I think there are no guarantees (about anything in life, really), but that any experienced surgeon is likely to do good work and produce a result that will be functionally and anatomically within the range of cis vulvas. That range is pretty large, too. :) One reason I think people say that it can't look cis is that they don't realize just *how* much variation there is in cis women; there are cis women who've had surgery or have scars from childbirth, women born with no inner labia, women with large/small clits, etc.

I can't promise anything either, obviously, but the GRS results I've seen in person have been perfectly normal-looking, and the owners reported that they worked fine. (As for myself, I had a gynecologist who wrote an official report that I was a cis woman with a hysterectomy, and then she argued with me when I called to get her to fix it!)

Don't worry too much if it looks really weird at first, either. Healing can take many months, and the interim stages are not necessarily that appealing.
Title: Re: I am so scared
Post by: SorchaC on October 09, 2016, 02:13:23 PM
Hi Rosie,

As others have said there is no way to know what it will look like but if you've done all the prep work of finding a competent surgeon and getting yourself ready for the surgery then there is no reason to believe that you won't have a good outcome.

Before my SRS I read a post on here from someone who had gone before me where she said having a positive outlook made recovery easier. I took this to heart and became determined that no matter what happened everything would be good. There are of course many things that can go wrong with any surgery but believe in your body and your surgeon and I am sure everything will go well. I am now 18 months post op and while I don't have the most perfect or beautiful vagina there is what I have is much better than what was there before and it all works very well.

The other thing to focus on is giving yourself the best chance to recover that you can, There are no gold medals for being able to do the most post op in the quickest time. Do everything your surgeon asks you to in terms of wound care and only move about when you need to so that your body can put all it's energy into healing.

Good luck with it all  ;D

Hugs

Sorcha  ;D
Title: Re: I am so scared
Post by: Beth Andrea on October 09, 2016, 04:22:58 PM
It is reasonable to have such fears before any surgery...trust your research efforts, and don't give too much hearing to tales of doom. Yes there's a risk but it is relatively small.

Instead of looking for botched surgeries, look for successful ones. Read about how important it is to follow the post-op care instructions (I suspect that's where most of the problems come from)...trust me, it's quite possible to talk yourself out of getting the surgery but the morning after canceling it you'll be kicking yourself in the butt for that. (Speaking from experience, I is!)

Trust your research and yourself!

Title: Re: I am so scared
Post by: Virginia Hall on October 09, 2016, 04:45:37 PM
Quote from: rosiecv on October 09, 2016, 04:42:57 AM
I am having srs in about three weeks. So many people are telling me ( and i am reading from forums, etc.) that the surgery isn't that realistic and my new vagina will not be anatomically correct. I am so scared and i cannot sleep. Will me new vagina be at least an adequate substitution for a natal one or should i just give up hope? :(

The stories you are hearing are scary tales told around the campfire. Unrealistic? Says who? Incorrect? You mean after 50 years all these doctors have not figured out how to do this surgery? Tish!

Relax. The surgeries are great these days. Think how wonderful it will be when you no longer have that "thing" to worry about. I know people who after they are unwrapped from all the mummy bandages weep with joy, relief, and deliverance from a living hell.

Pain management is a quantum level better than a generation ago when I had SRS. Don't let the ghost stories throw you off your game. There are tens of thousands of satisfied people who have had SRS.
Title: Re: I am so scared
Post by: Mariah on October 09, 2016, 05:50:04 PM
Rosie it will be adequate substation. I know I have surgery slightly sooner than that and I'm nervous too, but I promise what you will get will be well worth that wait. Yes it won't be exactly the same, but will be more than adequate substitution for the natal one. It's normal for us to have these concerns and when you have your pre op appointment you can ask the surgeon about that again if you like. I'm even going to ask my surgeon a couple more questions at my pre op  appointment. They expect that to occur so don't fret about it. Good luck, hugs and congrats on your upcoming SRS.
Mariah
Quote from: rosiecv on October 09, 2016, 04:42:57 AM
I am having srs in about three weeks. So many people are telling me ( and i am reading from forums, etc.) that the surgery isn't that realistic and my new vagina will not be anatomically correct. I am so scared and i cannot sleep. Will me new vagina be at least an adequate substitution for a natal one or should i just give up hope? :(
Title: Re: I am so scared
Post by: Dena on October 09, 2016, 06:12:19 PM
I received my surgery in 1982 and as long as you don't do a split leg examination, nobody would know the difference. With my surgery there was a second procedure that would make it appear more realistic. I didn't feel the need for it as if I am sexually active, my partner will be aware of my past. Single surgeries are producing far better results today but I haven't seen results from your doctor so I can't judge. Will a knowledgeable doctor not spot it? No because there will be some minor differences and a doctor who is aware of the difference will be able to tell. However, many women have had sex for extended periods of time with men who were not aware of their past and the surgery didn't give them away.

With a skilled doctor and no problems in surgery, you have nothing to worry about.