Community Conversation => Transgender talk => Topic started by: Artesia on October 24, 2016, 06:12:46 PM Return to Full Version
Title: Dysphoria representations?
Post by: Artesia on October 24, 2016, 06:12:46 PM
Post by: Artesia on October 24, 2016, 06:12:46 PM
Been thinking about the signs/symptoms of dysphoria, and had a question come up in my mind.
Ever since I was very little, when I wore a dress shirt and tie, I felt as if I were being strangled, but I can now wear a choker necklace without a problem. I am thinking that this physical response may have been an early sign of dysphoria, but I would like to know how others dysphoria manifested itself, and maybe get some insight into other things I may have dismissed.
Ever since I was very little, when I wore a dress shirt and tie, I felt as if I were being strangled, but I can now wear a choker necklace without a problem. I am thinking that this physical response may have been an early sign of dysphoria, but I would like to know how others dysphoria manifested itself, and maybe get some insight into other things I may have dismissed.
Title: Re: Dysphoria representations?
Post by: kathb31 on October 24, 2016, 09:29:51 PM
Post by: kathb31 on October 24, 2016, 09:29:51 PM
When I was a teenager I just hated my body. Hated my sex organs and wanted
to cut them off. Guess I was a little extreme in this area.
to cut them off. Guess I was a little extreme in this area.
Title: Re: Dysphoria representations?
Post by: cheryl reeves on October 25, 2016, 03:41:45 AM
Post by: cheryl reeves on October 25, 2016, 03:41:45 AM
I've hated suits period and still do,didnt even wear one when I got married. I've always loved dresses even though wearing them had to be done in private. Now sweaters are another story hate em in male mode but love em when in fem mode.
Title: Re: Dysphoria representations?
Post by: SarahElizabeth1981 on October 25, 2016, 04:10:38 AM
Post by: SarahElizabeth1981 on October 25, 2016, 04:10:38 AM
Kathb,
I'm with you on the whole genitals thing. I pre op so still have to put up with it but I hate it and wish I could rip it off... but since they use it to make what I should have... I will be nice to it >:-)
I can't relate to the clothing so I can't really comment. however, one thing that 'caused dysphoria and still does... top of the list is voice. Long before I started to transition or even had a thought that I might be trans there were times when I wished I could have my voice before I hit puberty.
I'm with you on the whole genitals thing. I pre op so still have to put up with it but I hate it and wish I could rip it off... but since they use it to make what I should have... I will be nice to it >:-)
I can't relate to the clothing so I can't really comment. however, one thing that 'caused dysphoria and still does... top of the list is voice. Long before I started to transition or even had a thought that I might be trans there were times when I wished I could have my voice before I hit puberty.
Title: Re: Dysphoria representations?
Post by: kathb31 on October 25, 2016, 07:41:38 AM
Post by: kathb31 on October 25, 2016, 07:41:38 AM
Sarah
Yes the voice .. I remember feeling so devastated when my voice changed
I thought it was the end of the world. And today one of the top 3 things
I wish for most is to have a nice feminine voice
Yes the voice .. I remember feeling so devastated when my voice changed
I thought it was the end of the world. And today one of the top 3 things
I wish for most is to have a nice feminine voice
Title: Re: Dysphoria representations?
Post by: Vervain on October 25, 2016, 08:07:55 AM
Post by: Vervain on October 25, 2016, 08:07:55 AM
My most severe dysphoria trigger is bathing, because I have to shave my face every. single. time. I like baths! But... feeling the hair on my face, that I know will be stubble again within 12hrs, is like a sharp pain in my gut each time. It never changes.
It doesn't help that my elevated testosterone levels (my levels without what is effectively HRT are in cis male range) mean that I have hair all. damn. over. and it is comparable to some of my current/previous AMAB partners. Yeah, like I said... it's a sharp twisting gut pain, all over. I try not to think about it too much, because it's depressing, and I can't afford laser hair removal likely ANYTIME soon. Sigh.
It doesn't help that my elevated testosterone levels (my levels without what is effectively HRT are in cis male range) mean that I have hair all. damn. over. and it is comparable to some of my current/previous AMAB partners. Yeah, like I said... it's a sharp twisting gut pain, all over. I try not to think about it too much, because it's depressing, and I can't afford laser hair removal likely ANYTIME soon. Sigh.
Title: Re: Dysphoria representations?
Post by: Nuuni on October 26, 2016, 12:57:06 AM
Post by: Nuuni on October 26, 2016, 12:57:06 AM
I mostly just feel like a vehicle.
But for specific things? My facial hair is an annoyance; I shave it every day, which is fine. Rubbing my face afterwards is a bit odd, but I pretty much forget about it all day. But if it gets a bit too long, I start feeling like I need to touch it, like a tongue on dental work. The second day is about as annoying as a dead battery in a fire alarm. If for some reason I skip shaving a second day, it gets up to fire alarm distracting, and people have commented on me rubbing my face constantly.
My voice used to be weird like a Star Wars alien to me, but I have adjusted my voice a lot.
But for specific things? My facial hair is an annoyance; I shave it every day, which is fine. Rubbing my face afterwards is a bit odd, but I pretty much forget about it all day. But if it gets a bit too long, I start feeling like I need to touch it, like a tongue on dental work. The second day is about as annoying as a dead battery in a fire alarm. If for some reason I skip shaving a second day, it gets up to fire alarm distracting, and people have commented on me rubbing my face constantly.
My voice used to be weird like a Star Wars alien to me, but I have adjusted my voice a lot.
Title: Re: Dysphoria representations?
Post by: Xirafel on October 26, 2016, 01:06:25 AM
Post by: Xirafel on October 26, 2016, 01:06:25 AM
Quote from: Nuuni on October 26, 2016, 12:57:06 AM^^
My facial hair is an annoyance; I shave it every day, which is fine. Rubbing my face afterwards is a bit odd, but I pretty much forget about it all day. But if it gets a bit too long, I start feeling like I need to touch it, like a tongue on dental work. The second day is about as annoying as a dead battery in a fire alarm. If for some reason I skip shaving a second day, it gets up to fire alarm distracting, and people have commented on me rubbing my face constantly.
My voice used to be weird like a Star Wars alien to me, but I have adjusted my voice a lot.
My voice is really, really super weird. Other people seem to like it for some reason, but it just sounds strange and distorted to me. And my manner of speaking always makes me feel like I'm overcompensating for something.
I obsessively shave all of the hair, except the hair on my scalp. Mainly because the hair grows at the speed of light.
And it's a form of rebellion at the hormones making it grow so fast and I'm a bit of a perfectionist.
Also, the facial hair is really, really annoying x.x
Title: Re: Dysphoria representations?
Post by: PrincessCrystal on October 26, 2016, 07:16:28 AM
Post by: PrincessCrystal on October 26, 2016, 07:16:28 AM
Quote from: cheryl reeves on October 25, 2016, 03:41:45 AMI've hated suits period and still do,didnt even wear one when I got married. I've always loved dresses even though wearing them had to be done in private. Now sweaters are another story hate em in male mode but love em when in fem mode.I always hate the way my body looks in a suit: they just look wrong on me. I know part of this is that they're not well tailored to my slim shoulders and feminine frame, but I also wonder now if it's a form of gender dysphoria. When I'm there for Christmas, I'm going to ask for the present from my mom's family to be taking me to a tailor and get one of those effeminate waist-hugging V-shaped suits that gay guys seem to like, because that might actually look really nice on me...
Title: Re: Dysphoria representations?
Post by: Vendetta on October 26, 2016, 05:09:28 PM
Post by: Vendetta on October 26, 2016, 05:09:28 PM
For me its body hair and voice i was always embarrassed of my hairy chest and legs and would hide it at all cost the feel of hair on my face drives me crazy and i turn into a big jerk until its gone. cloths always frustrated me i've never found any type of style i like as guy but as a girl its freaking awesome its impossible to not find something i like, as long as i cant see any bulge from the stupid thing below my waist but someday that will be fixed!!!!
Title: Re: Dysphoria representations?
Post by: Beth Andrea on October 26, 2016, 06:41:14 PM
Post by: Beth Andrea on October 26, 2016, 06:41:14 PM
1. Whiskers
2. The little dangler...always gets in the way at the most inopportune times (i.e., during sex), and seems to have a mind of its own.
3. Shoulders
2. The little dangler...always gets in the way at the most inopportune times (i.e., during sex), and seems to have a mind of its own.
3. Shoulders
Title: Re: Dysphoria representations?
Post by: Artesia on October 27, 2016, 04:22:50 PM
Post by: Artesia on October 27, 2016, 04:22:50 PM
Thank you for the replies. I'm looking for the feelings or responses of people with the dysphoria, rather than the cause.
Cause male dress clothing, effect chocking feeling.
I don't like my lack of head hair, excess body hair, and the general appearance of my male body. The effect was depression, anger at the world, self loathing, and apathy. Not to mention gender swap dreams/fantasies, and escaping into female video game characters.
Thank you all, and further insight into the bodies/minds responses is greatly appreciated.
Cause male dress clothing, effect chocking feeling.
I don't like my lack of head hair, excess body hair, and the general appearance of my male body. The effect was depression, anger at the world, self loathing, and apathy. Not to mention gender swap dreams/fantasies, and escaping into female video game characters.
Thank you all, and further insight into the bodies/minds responses is greatly appreciated.
Title: Re: Dysphoria representations?
Post by: Beth Andrea on October 27, 2016, 07:21:57 PM
Post by: Beth Andrea on October 27, 2016, 07:21:57 PM
The feelings/responses in my case range from a moderate-to-strong "icky!" feeling of self, to outright repulsed.
Whiskers create a strong emotional "hurt" within, not pinpoint like a bee sting, but just as uncomfortable from the heart region to the chin area.
Nausea often happens during or after sex (where the dangler is involved; when I have strictly female sex no such effect)
When I become aware of my shoulders (I'm usually dissociated from them) I imagine taking an axe to whittle them to proper size...but I realize that is not considered a proper surgical technique, so I end up with resignation which sometimes ends in despair., which is resolved with renewed dissociation.
Whiskers create a strong emotional "hurt" within, not pinpoint like a bee sting, but just as uncomfortable from the heart region to the chin area.
Nausea often happens during or after sex (where the dangler is involved; when I have strictly female sex no such effect)
When I become aware of my shoulders (I'm usually dissociated from them) I imagine taking an axe to whittle them to proper size...but I realize that is not considered a proper surgical technique, so I end up with resignation which sometimes ends in despair., which is resolved with renewed dissociation.