Community Conversation => Transgender talk => Topic started by: maraesque on January 13, 2017, 09:31:08 PM Return to Full Version
Title: Weird Interaction
Post by: maraesque on January 13, 2017, 09:31:08 PM
Post by: maraesque on January 13, 2017, 09:31:08 PM
Hey, just felt compelled to write this down somewhere because I'm not really sure how I feel about it. Bewildered.
Tonight I had the pleasure of attending a Trans/Queer Poetry evening in a pub on the other side of the city from me. I was heartened by all the people there packing the room and inspired by all of the performers. I also came out to my friend who had also come along and we talked at length about all manner of things.
Anyway, I walked home alone and stopped into get fish and chips, only to be greeted by a couple who had been at the same pub as us, but not as part of the event. They were both clearly drunk and the woman said 'He was at the bar tonight!' and the man replied 'Naw, naw... SHE! They're a she!' and started laughing. I promptly put my earphones back in, because I avoid talking to strangers at the best of times and had no idea how to react.
Now, I'm incredibly early in my transition and very much still present as male. I even had a facefull of stubble today (not enough spoons to shave) so it's clear his comment was somehow in reaction to the group I'd been seen with, not to me personally. I found the whole thing very bizarre. He must have been in his late forties, but he was giggling like a giddy schoolboy at his... Joke? I guess? Like, what was his goal? To mock me by misgendering me? Because he actually inadvertently became the first stranger to ever correctly gender me in person...
Just a very odd end to what has been and will remain a wonderful night. ???
Tonight I had the pleasure of attending a Trans/Queer Poetry evening in a pub on the other side of the city from me. I was heartened by all the people there packing the room and inspired by all of the performers. I also came out to my friend who had also come along and we talked at length about all manner of things.
Anyway, I walked home alone and stopped into get fish and chips, only to be greeted by a couple who had been at the same pub as us, but not as part of the event. They were both clearly drunk and the woman said 'He was at the bar tonight!' and the man replied 'Naw, naw... SHE! They're a she!' and started laughing. I promptly put my earphones back in, because I avoid talking to strangers at the best of times and had no idea how to react.
Now, I'm incredibly early in my transition and very much still present as male. I even had a facefull of stubble today (not enough spoons to shave) so it's clear his comment was somehow in reaction to the group I'd been seen with, not to me personally. I found the whole thing very bizarre. He must have been in his late forties, but he was giggling like a giddy schoolboy at his... Joke? I guess? Like, what was his goal? To mock me by misgendering me? Because he actually inadvertently became the first stranger to ever correctly gender me in person...
Just a very odd end to what has been and will remain a wonderful night. ???
Title: Re: Weird Interaction
Post by: Jacqueline on January 13, 2017, 11:55:53 PM
Post by: Jacqueline on January 13, 2017, 11:55:53 PM
I am so sorry you had to experience that. It sounds like you reacted the best way one could.
Who knows why people look for approval and a higher standing by knocking down others. However, it is easier to do that with an idea you find beyond your grasp. It is easier to laugh at something that might scare you. Usually we fear what we do not fully comprehend.
I am glad you can hold onto the good part of the evening.
With warmth,
Joanna
Who knows why people look for approval and a higher standing by knocking down others. However, it is easier to do that with an idea you find beyond your grasp. It is easier to laugh at something that might scare you. Usually we fear what we do not fully comprehend.
I am glad you can hold onto the good part of the evening.
With warmth,
Joanna