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I don't get the rule 'Don't hit girls'. I mean, I wouldn't hit one of my friends (girl) that was soft, but I'd hit one of my semi-tomboy friends. I'd deffinatly hit guys. I do it all the time with my friends. It just seems wrong to hit a 'soft' girl, if you know what I mean. (not dirty) It just seems like they would take it wrong and would get upset or something. Anyone want to expand on this?

I seriously hope you're not male.

Quote from: The_Unforgiven on November 16, 2007, 05:11:43 PM
I don't get the rule 'Don't hit girls'. I mean, I wouldn't hit one of my friends (girl) that was soft, but I'd hit one of my semi-tomboy friends. I'd deffinatly hit guys. I do it all the time with my friends. It just seems wrong to hit a 'soft' girl, if you know what I mean. (not dirty)

I MUST be misunderstanding something... why would you be hitting anyone?

Do you mean a guyish, playful light punch to the shoulder? Or a hitting someone in the face?

QuoteIt just seems like they would take it wrong and would get upset or something.

If you hit me, I'd be VERY VERY upset! As in call the cops kinda upset.

~Kate~

My rule on it is pretty easy: Assault me= you wake up in a hospital bed. I have no issues with defending myself. "Play" as in sparring is good though.
Rashelle

Quote from: Rashelle on November 16, 2007, 08:21:25 PM
My rule on it is pretty easy: Assault me= you wake up in a hospital bed. I have no issues with defending myself. "Play" as in sparring is good though.
Rashelle

You took the words right out of mouth Rashelle  :)


buttercup  :)  (don't let the name fool you, I won't take sh*t from nobody!)

My rule is easier.

Don't hit anyone dumbstick.

Don't get me wrong, I don't hurt anybody. I'm just playing around with my friends. I've never really hurt anyone like that.

oh in that case, slap yer girl mates silly. They always beat me anyway.

Quote from: Rashelle on November 16, 2007, 08:21:25 PM
My rule on it is pretty easy: Assault me= you wake up in a hospital bed. I have no issues with defending myself. "Play" as in sparring is good though.
Rashelle

Yeah, I've seen a guy get really messed up from refusing to hit women.
He basicly walked out of the bar and the group of chicks followed him out and beat the crap out of him.
Defense is defense.  Women push so often for equality anyways, they should have it.

But fighting is bad anyways, unless it's in a ring.

Posted on: November 17, 2007, 12:16:16 AM

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Quote from: Pica Pica on November 16, 2007, 08:44:04 PM
My rule is easier.

Don't hit anyone dumbstick.

I'm a girl and all...
BUT PLEASE HIT ME WITH A SMART STICK?

I really could use it.

I dunno, most of my friends that are girls don't like to play rough. Maybe that's why I don't hit them. If they were ok with it, I would though. I'm not saying girls are weak, because I'm not trying to be sexist or anything. It really depends on the individual person, not on whether you're a girl or a boy. That's why I don't really understand that rule.

hitting girls aint cool.  a dude should never hit a girl.  only coward dudes hit girls.  hit me instead & see what happens >:D

i agree completely with Chris. hitting girls is not ok. a guy at my school punched a girl at my school in the back and three guys were on him in two seconds. hitting girls isnt cool.

I'm too old school I guess.  Don't ever hit a girl, unless it is a life and death, self-defense situation.  Or maybe it might save her life.  But for the most part, it's just not cool.  I remember being beaten up as a child, wondering why I couldn't be a girl so everything would be OK.

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fganjataz.com%2F01smileys%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2FloopyBlonde-blinking.gif&hash=4545ddf8251cf9c32ae6074d56e48bc34a755857)Kristi

"men" that hit women are low lives and need help urgently.

Quote from: Katia on November 18, 2007, 12:16:13 AM
"People" that hit people are low lives and need help urgently.

Fixed!

Sexism 4tL,  no matter which way it flows.

Quote from: Jaycie on November 18, 2007, 12:32:05 AM

Quote from: Katia on November 18, 2007, 12:16:13 AM
"People" that hit people are low lives and need help urgently.

Fixed!

Sexism 4tL,  no matter which way it flows.

thanks. yea. very true. most of them are "men" though ;)

Quote from: Katia on November 18, 2007, 12:41:13 AM
thanks. yea. very true. most of them are "men" though ;)

Oh I dunno... I've had the &@^!! beat out of me twice in my life. One of those times was by a girl ;)

~Kate~

yea I've met some "catty" women

I hate that term ><

you guys people dont intend to make a heated debate out of a simple question, do you?   that'd be unbecoming to us, staff members.

I didn't know you all had such strong opinions about this. Hmm...

Ok, just to be completely clear, I don't think women are weak, but generally, (not always) they don't like to play rough. Again, it depends on the individual. Obviously, we all know that people can break the rules of gender roles, even if they are not transgendered. I am not trying to hurt anyone's feelings, I just wanted to know how you all felt towards that rule.

I have got to agree with all here.  Only jerks hit girls

I have to disagree, but only in the case of a good spanking. >:D

I don't agree with some of the people here that "men" who hit "girls" are cowards. They are actually very brave and stupid (there is a thin line between the two) because they make themselves outcasts from every sector of society. From what I've observed on the sidelines, there are two types of "men" who hit "girls", there's the domestic violence type, where the man becomes frustrated and can no longer control his anger in a heated argument with his spouse (sometimes she might bait him on purpose for the purpose of using it against him), then there are the big "bad ass" thug types who are not afraid of "three guys from school" trying to assault him if he hits a girl. Such bully types grow up not afraid of anything. They think their girlfriend will love them more if they beat them or something (she is may be calling up loved ones in the middle of the night saying things like "he hit me again but I love him").

I play fight with my girl. Wrestle around, leg ties etc...but never HIT. Iv'e been slapped hard as HELL across the face (kinda deserved it), and could of easily pummled the girl, but I kept my cool, used a few choice words and let it go. It is NEVER okay to hit a girl. Iv'e seen guys get beat almost to death for abusing women. If you know physically you're stronger than anyone, male or female, and are "playing around", you should know your limits.

I think that instead of asking whether it is okay for a "man" to playfully hit a "girl", it would be better to ask whether any of these people, male or female, actually want to be playfully hit and slapped around. Even if you are "male", if your friends are hitting you and you don't like it, it is not cool at all. If you are female and you are okay with your male friends "playfully" hitting you, I guess I don't see the problem.

well heres the deal on why you shouldn't hit girls.


Their bodies are pretty delicate and it hurts them a lot more when they get hit. They get easily brusied, they have a different balance and can fall easily if pushed. They have less endurance- meaning they can't throw in as many punches as guys nor can they hit as hard. Their arms, chest, shoulder, frame and hands are a lot smaller- which means that they're bodies aren't suitable to go into a fight with men. Plus they also have breasts which plays role(my theory) in they way you punch.

So that's why women get upset because it is threatening to them.

And remember this is just a generalization- many women can knock the wind out of men.

About hitting girls- well sometimes if women get violent with men and they don't stop- men should restrain them. If men are threatened by them, I guess it's fine for them to go ahead and use self-defense BUT not use exccesive force.- just till they stop.

Aside from this exception from hitting girls- I think your a coward if you hit women, in fact I think your coward if you hit anyone regardless of gender that is obviously physically inferior to you.


Posted on: November 24, 2007, 11:07:29 AM

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Quote from: Emmalene on November 23, 2007, 12:35:40 PM
I think that instead of asking whether it is okay for a "man" to playfully hit a "girl", it would be better to ask whether any of these people, male or female, actually want to be playfully hit and slapped around. Even if you are "male", if your friends are hitting you and you don't like it, it is not cool at all. If you are female and you are okay with your male friends "playfully" hitting you, I guess I don't see the problem.

agreed but the problem is that when your male and you get hit- your expected to take it like it's okay

Quote from: Tanya1 on November 24, 2007, 11:08:39 AM

Aside from this exception from hitting girls- I think your a coward if you hit women, in fact I think your coward if you hit anyone regardless of gender that is obviously physically inferior to you.

agreed but the problem is that when your male and you get hit- your expected to take it like it's okay

The problem is that a man who assaults a physically inferior "man" will not be treated like a coward. The three guys who would not hesitate to kick his butt if the physically inferior person were a women would not only not do anything if the physically inferior person were male, but they would probably respect the bully and kiss his butt. This is probably why transgendered people are in constant danger of getting assaulted. If they have a penis hanging between their legs, it wont matter if they feel they are really women.

Quote from: Tanya1 on November 24, 2007, 11:08:39 AM
Their bodies are pretty delicate and it hurts them a lot more when they get hit. They get easily brusied, they have a different balance and can fall easily if pushed. They have less endurance- meaning they can't throw in as many punches as guys nor can they hit as hard. Their arms, chest, shoulder, frame and hands are a lot smaller- which means that they're bodies aren't suitable to go into a fight with men. Plus they also have breasts which plays role(my theory) in they way you punch.

I work with, and have had the pleasure of knowing, plenty of women that could easily handle themselves in a fight (it comes with the job).  Not every woman is a delicate china doll.

Im from the deep south our rule is more like you hit a girl and you get hit back by every male around and then some. Id never hit a girl tomboy or not its just not right.

I don't hit girls, unless it's a playful thing. Anybody who treats anybody else as something less than equal, as a whole, needs some serious help.



However, this mindframe doesn't stop girls from hitting me, heh.

Quote from: Kristi on November 17, 2007, 10:20:51 PM
I remember being beaten up as a child, wondering why I couldn't be a girl so everything would be OK.

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fganjataz.com%2F01smileys%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2FloopyBlonde-blinking.gif&hash=4545ddf8251cf9c32ae6074d56e48bc34a755857)Kristi

Oh Kristi... your words just released some long lost memories... a flood of emotion and tears.  I had completely forgotten those times.  I felt the same way.  I was beaten many times when I was young.  I can't deal with this right now.  I'm going to log off and find a warm blanket, soft light, and some music for some good cry time.

Cindi

Quote from: Kate on November 18, 2007, 12:48:34 AM

Quote from: Katia on November 18, 2007, 12:41:13 AM
thanks. yea. very true. most of them are "men" though ;)

Oh I dunno... I've had the &@^!! beat out of me twice in my life. One of those times was by a girl ;)

~Kate~

If you tell me where this beating by women took place, I shall avoid the neighborhood.

Wing Walker

Never, ever hit anyone! Grow up!

Yep. Just don't hit anyone, period. Unless it's self-defense, in which case it doesn't matter who you're defending yourself against, hit 'em.

This seems to be more of a schientific or Philosophical question as to why the rule is:

The old rule is this:
Gentlemen don't hit ladies.
Gentlemen open doors for ladies.

Basicly, other than in absoulute self defense or light flirty shoves the rule applies in most places. I don't think it completely applies to butch girls though as they don't want' the special treatment.

However other than the whole Womens body bruises more easily thing, the main reason probably has to do with traditional views of men and women.
Men are viewed traditionally (even if somewhat stereotypically) as protectors of women.
You are not protecting the woman if you hit her.
That said, it's an old rule. If you are worried about playing, the thing is in playfulness, you just don't hit as hard as you would a guy in playfulness. and you don't hit like you mean it. just a playful shoulder tap or somthing in fun. not enough to hurt.

In a serious situation like life or death, all rules are void.

But for playfulness that is the rule as well as in general anger.
No matter how mad she makes you, you don't hit her unless you want to be an abusive jerk.

That has been my understanding of the rule.

Quote from: The_Unforgiven on November 16, 2007, 05:11:43 PM
I don't get the rule 'Don't hit girls'.

It's an expression of our patriarchal society.  In a feminist society the rule would be, "Don't hit."

Quote from: Chris on November 17, 2007, 02:10:23 PM
hitting girls aint cool.  a dude should never hit a girl.  only coward dudes hit girls.  hit me instead & see what happens >:D

Exactly ;)

I have never EVER hit a woman and never will do.. Yes they make me angry but I couldn't hit a woman I would never forgive myself if I did.

My high school best friend (Chris) always got picked on because of his size and height and one day a woman started attacking him in school, for no reason what so ever it was out of the blue. I watched him stand there whilst this woman was literally beating the poor man blue... He wouldn't even defend himself against her; I myself in the end had to pull her off him where she started hitting me... I told her to calm down and lucky a teacher arrived just in time.

If I had to defend myself against a woman attacking me I would, depending on the type of attack... (Stabbing) would depend on what I would do, I of course would try reasoning with her first... it depends on how violent.

Most women around where I live can handle themselves and are actually more violent than men are. However it still doesn't excuse hitting a woman.

I hit men yes to defend myself or if there complete arses...

But I don't go out of my way to get into a fight with anyone.

I remember when I was in primary school (elementary) there was this one guy who would run around and hit girls (not really hurting them, just hitting them. And he would get called "gay" the rest of the boys kept saying "if you hit girls then you are gay" I never rightly understood that...  But I guess kids will be kids...


WOW! I wrote alot!  :o

Quote from: Lisbeth on January 03, 2008, 10:20:36 AM
It's an expression of our patriarchal society.  In a feminist society the rule would be, "Don't hit."

Absolutely right! Violence is never a good way to deal with problems, it merely creates more violence.

y2g

Quote from: y2gender on January 04, 2008, 11:48:00 AM

Absolutely right! Violence is never a good way to deal with problems, it merely creates more violence.

Not if you score a knockout:-)

A human is a human, regardless of gender.  If a bitch swings at me, I'll swing right back, unless I have an opportunity to get out of the situation.

This blue blooded fantastical concept of, "violence is bad" really get on my nerves.  Humanity is a violent creature.  Wars are good.  The last war gave every Jew in the world back part of their holy land.  Before that it saved the United States economy.  Abolished slavery.  Told the Mexicans who's boss.  Set up a beautiful country that changed worldwide values.

I won't mention modern wars due to the controvercy.

But the point is, that war isn't a bad thing.  People die, but they would die anyways.  In a world with this many people in it, the only way for great change to come about IS war.

Violence is nessecary at times, simply because there are violent people in this world then there will be more violent people in this world.  At times there really is an all or nothing, where you have to stand up for what you believe in.

People in the United States have gone soft and hypocritical, sneering at violence and wars and saying that violence is bad period and that we should never go to war even when we're being bombarded and threatened worldwide by terrorists.  They point their fingers and scream for change, but when it comes down to the only thing that will change it they show their backsides because they're too scared to face the bitter truth of this world.

I'm frankly disgusted by this, "world peace" bull->-bleeped-<-.  Peace is nice and needed, and the ultimate goal of war IS peace.  But peace forever is stale and people forget why they want peace so badly.  You cannot recognise the good without the bad.

Violence and pillaging, for the win.

Quote from: kalt on January 07, 2008, 06:28:34 PM

Quote from: y2gender on January 04, 2008, 11:48:00 AM

Absolutely right! Violence is never a good way to deal with problems, it merely creates more violence.

Not if you score a knockout:-)

A human is a human, regardless of gender.  If a bitch swings at me, I'll swing right back, unless I have an opportunity to get out of the situation.

This blue blooded fantastical concept of, "violence is bad" really get on my nerves.  Humanity is a violent creature.  Wars are good.  The last war gave every Jew in the world back part of their holy land.  Before that it saved the United States economy.  Abolished slavery.  Told the Mexicans who's boss.  Set up a beautiful country that changed worldwide values.

I won't mention modern wars due to the controvercy.

But the point is, that war isn't a bad thing.  People die, but they would die anyways.  In a world with this many people in it, the only way for great change to come about IS war.

Violence is nessecary at times, simply because there are violent people in this world then there will be more violent people in this world.  At times there really is an all or nothing, where you have to stand up for what you believe in.

People in the United States have gone soft and hypocritical, sneering at violence and wars and saying that violence is bad period and that we should never go to war even when we're being bombarded and threatened worldwide by terrorists.  They point their fingers and scream for change, but when it comes down to the only thing that will change it they show their backsides because they're too scared to face the bitter truth of this world.

I'm frankly disgusted by this, "world peace" bull->-bleeped-<-.  Peace is nice and needed, and the ultimate goal of war IS peace.  But peace forever is stale and people forget why they want peace so badly.  You cannot recognise the good without the bad.

Violence and pillaging, for the win.

Wow. I've heard that point made many times, but you really got it through to me. That was really moving. I gave you an Applaud for that.  :)

Am I missing something or have we not pretty much laid waste to Iraq, over a 17 year period now causing up to 1/4 million deaths, without being all that upset about it, save a few hippies out in Cali that no one is listening to anyway?  Do we not have the highest murder rate in the world?  Are we not constantly moving thermonuclear weapons around the world as a routine matter, and does the president not have a guy right there with him at all times with the launch codes 'just in case'?   Matter of fact, are we not the only people to have used them, not once, but twice?  Do we not spend more than any other nation in the world on our military?  I think we spend more on our military that most of the rest of the world combined.  Does the United States not have a military presence in over 120 different countries?

And the end goal of war is not peace, its piece.  We want a piece of your oil, a piece of your resources...

This really doesn't need to turn into a war debate. War is wrong, yes, but it does bring change and good things sometimes.

War is the just the meta version of violence, where hitting girls is the micro version.  The question is the same.

DOES MIGHT MAKE RIGHT?  Do the ends justify the means?  Is meeting violence with more violence a road to peace? 

In the meta, as in the micro I think the answer is the same: violence is the last resort of a rational person, and the first resort of the moron.  (note: substitute 'nation' for 'person' in the meta)

Quote from: tekla on January 08, 2008, 12:34:47 PM
And the end goal of war is not peace, its piece.  We want a piece of your oil, a piece of your resources...

I cannot disagree with you more.

If it were about money, then we'd be in a lot more countries that were a lot more economically beneficial, like the countries in africa that had diamond mines, or plowing through South America for different metal ores.  It's a bunch of bull->-bleeped-<-, the USA has small occupations all over the world for medical research and diplomacy.  If we're going to send our citizens there to vacation and go oggle eyed over everything outside their country, we need to be able to pull them out of they get a stolen Visa, or if some terrorist attack breaks out.

If anyone doesn't like being an American, and feel the need to slander this country and blindly follow the highly liberal, traitorous media, then they need to get out.

Posted on: January 08, 2008, 09:33:50 PM

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Quote from: tekla on January 08, 2008, 06:05:55 PM
In the meta, as in the micro I think the answer is the same: violence is the last resort of a rational person, and the first resort of the moron.  (note: substitute 'nation' for 'person' in the meta)

And that's very wise, I couldn't agree more.

Well we're half way there then.

But, as Smedley Butler (look him up, great stuff) once said, 'the flag follows the dollar, and the soliders follow the flag.'  As one of the very, very few two time Congressional Medal of Honor winners, and a general in the USMC, he kind of knew.

If a girl somehow managed to penetrate my amazingly high tolerance level with enough antagonism to make me jack slap her, she would for sure deserve it.  :-\

I got bullied a lot because I was girlie Why do you want to hit girls.  :(  I never became what I am because of bullies :'( I was afraid to express myself. SHAME ON YOU. :(

Quote from: Cindi Jones on November 27, 2007, 02:23:28 AM

Quote from: Kristi on November 17, 2007, 10:20:51 PM
I remember being beaten up as a child, wondering why I couldn't be a girl so everything would be OK.

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fganjataz.com%2F01smileys%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2FloopyBlonde-blinking.gif&hash=4545ddf8251cf9c32ae6074d56e48bc34a755857)Kristi

Oh Kristi... your words just released some long lost memories... a flood of emotion and tears.  I had completely forgotten those times.  I felt the same way.  I was beaten many times when I was young.  I can't deal with this right now.  I'm going to log off and find a warm blanket, soft light, and some music for some good cry time.

Cindi

I feel you there...same happened to me. I don't remember most incidents, they are repressed memories now. I can remember the name, age, and lots of details about said bullies, but not the actual events.

I got hit mostly by boys, though a girl really got me out of my indifference one time. I turned around, held her at her collar, and just stayed that way, and let her go after a minute or so (she was actually taller than me, and larger - this was in 9th grade). I never hit or fought anyone. I defended myself with...well, nails, teeth and running away. Nails and teeth was when I felt it was a life/death deal...and it got me nicknamed 'cat' for a year or two in elementary (5th and 6th grade). I'm thankful I never got broken bones or serious bruises.

I'm against all violence from anyone to anyone else.

If the rule is only "Guys don't hit girls" some will choose to take advantage of the loophole and men who can't or won't defend themselves will lose, sometimes be arrested, for not defending themselves...

I think the rule "don't hit girls" generally starts at around puberty. Before that, there's not much physical difference between the sexes, and there are as many girl bullies as there are boys. It's not fair that little boys get yelled at for defending themselves against girls, especially if it's an older or bigger girl against a younger boy. Even older kids or grown men can be victims of violence, especially since you don't have to be bigger than someone to abuse them. (A lot of female victims of violence are bullied by husbands who aren't even bigger than they are - it's more of a power thing.) Husband abuse does occur, though I guess it's harder for a guy to bring himself to report it. So, really, no one should commit violence against anyone, and everyone has the right to defend themselves, whatever their sex.

Because most women cannot beat a man one-on-one in a fight and it's up to the man to exercise restraint. Muscle mass makes the difference.

I'll admit, I play the punch buggy game with my friends.  I was with my friend Sam and she kept getting me on the bus because she had the window seat and I couldn't see out.  So went to where we needed to go and came back and waited for the bus again.  While we were waiting I saw a beetle drive around the corner.  I got really excited and got her with a punch buggy right in the arm.  In my excitement I hit her a little harder than I meant to.

Then a few days later we were walking on the sidewalk and another beetle drives by.  She hit me really hard and I wasn't even paying attention.  But yeah, the whole muscle mass thing definitely makes a difference.  Whereas I didn't even try to hit her very hard and accidentally did, I think she intentionally tried to hit me but it only startled me. 

But my line of reasoning is I won't start a fight but I'll sure as heck finish it if I need to regardless of who started it.

I remember learning the "Guys don't hit girls" rule in early elementary school back in the 1960's.  At first you didn't do it because of the 'rules'.  Then you didn't do it because you were considered a coward or worse.

Call it a spinoff of the 'protect the weaker sex' mentality that existed at the time.

Personally I prefer the "Don't hit anybody" mentality, both physically and emotionally. 

If you are the one who hits first, with intent, you are a bully.  This includes 'hitting' with insults, lies and other emotional hits.

At the same time, you do have the right to defend yourself.

Quote from: soldierjane on February 20, 2008, 10:39:56 AM
Because most women cannot beat a man one-on-one in a fight and it's up to the man to exercise restraint. Muscle mass makes the difference.

bone structure, wieght, hieght(sort of), knuckle size and arm lenght too