Susan's Place Transgender Resources

We're new here so we're unsure if this is the correct forum to post to. Sorry I'm advance if we're wrong.

We're a girl and a guy occasionally we're androgynous. So are we?
Genderfluid?
Genderflux?
Gender Non-binary?
Or is there some other term for us?


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If you feel equally male on some days then female another I believe you can use the term gender fluid or gender flux depending on your preference. Androgyny is when you look or feel equally male and female all of the time. All of these terms are under the nb trans umbrella.

If you want more help tumblr is a great source for nb people and its. I like to follow the nonbinary network; which also has a youtube channel. You might also want to check out beyond the binary uk; which is a uk based online magazine about all things nb.

This forum also has a non binary section that you may want to look at.

Welcome to Susan's Place. I am making an assumption about your usage of "we" which can imply two different things. I am assuming the more common meaning and that would be a member of the non binary. We are unable to tell you the exact label that applies because that requires far more information than you have given us however our WIKI  (https://www.susans.org/wiki/Transgender) is a good place to start. I suspect there are non binary feelings that don't have a name yet so if these terms don't match up, it's not that important to have a label to describe your feelings as you  are still welcome here.

We issue to all new members the following links so you will best be able to use the web site.

Site Terms of Service & Rules to Live By (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,2.0.html)	Standard Terms & Definitions (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,54369.0.html)	Post Ranks (including when you can upload an avatar) (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,114.0.html.)
Reputation rules (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,18960.0.html)	News posting & quoting guidelines (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,174951.0.html)	Photo, avatars, & signature images policy (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,59974.msg383866.html#msg383866)

Hi Dienza, welcome to Susan's Place! When we're trying to find ourselves a label can be soothing because it signifies that we understand what's going on. Ultimately the only label that's going to fit is "You".  :)

I've used various descriptors, genderfluid, bi-gender, two-spirit, and non-binary. It's all going to depend on how you see yourself.  "Call me anything except late for dinner!" is my motto.  ;D.

See you around the site!

Hugs, Devlyn

Hi Dienza,

I'm new here too. It was helpful for me to read over the wiki on terms, but still didn't find a label that felt like it fit. Maybe you'll have better luck. 

I'm curious how you present your gender. Is it a decision you make based on how you feel when you get dressed each day? Like more masculine or feminine or androgynous at different times? I'm non binary too and live in a conservative small town.  If I was in high school or college I might know of other non binary people in my town, but I'm almost 40 and live a fairly isolated life other than my a handful of family & friends.

I present my gender in how I walk and talk. We've grown used to speaking in third person view. Occasionally people/friends notice and change their pronouns of us. And the way we dress.
Eg.
Man: Jeans, Tee-shirt, a casio 5302 watch and a sort of surly alpha male type of walk
Woman: no casio 5302 watch and a more lady like posture and walk.

I occasionally carry a extra set of ladies undergarments in my bag together with a semi unisex wallet/clutch. Some of my friends sort of blank me now. But I am Who I am. And they can remain in their shells for those own reasons. I'm/we're here for us and not to make them happy.


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Thanks for the words of wisdom Devlyn [emoji5].


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Hi Dienza,

The wiki is really quite good, and a great place to start, and it took me quite a while to work out too.
This is my understanding, maybe it'll help.

Non-binary is 'everything' outside of binaristic MtF or FtM, androgyny is strongly male and female genders together, and neutrois, is neutral gender. Agender is a feeling of no gender at all.

Gender fluidity is where some days you'll feel more feminine, and others no gender, or masculine and neutrois, or feminine to neutrois to masculine to a gender or all of the above - it's an attempt to describe a sense of gender that isn't fixed, and moves around, and that can also be described as gender flux - but it's trying to convey a sense of time reflecting the rate of gender change fluid, being slower, and flux faster.

BI gender is simply where some of our personality or behaviour is strongly one of our genders and others are the other of our genders - it's an umbrella for the two spirit person, and often you'll hear the term Demi used where there is a clear proportion that is characteristically one gender.

So, for me that builds up to being non-binary. I'm BI gender, neutrois and feminine, and a strong component of my gender is feminine so I am a neutrois-demigirl, who was assigned male at birth, by the faulty medical sorting hat, and culturally raised as masculine... which I can't do, and the more I understand, the more I realise this simple fact.

Pronouns are more personal, and I'm very neutrois about them, I'll respond to he, she, it, they, zir, pretty much anything, because I am me (although quietly I love it when it's she/her - it's the girl in me ;) )

For me it's been a slow journey, but I feel I understand myself a lot better now - a journey that would no doubt have been sped up by seeing a gender therapist, but I am fortunate that I have no burning need to transition (yet!).

(Hugs)


Sno

Ps, you'll see me sign off as Rowan mostly now, as I feel mostly feminine. It's  my way of trying to make up to myself for years of denying my inner girl - this is her stage.

Thanks Rowan for your help. [emoji5]


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