Susan's Place Transgender Resources

I'm always reading about how when CDs get dressed up all of a sudden they're this other person, a femme take on who they are.  Sometimes the femme version is radically different.

When I put on women's clothing absolutely nothing changes whatsoever, it's the same person as Julie, maybe the low heels will change my walk.  I wasn't overboard butch in the first place and if I were to transition for real I might look into pointers on being more of a woman, and a new name would be in order, of course, but otherwise it's just ol' K**** with boobs.

Is this a fundamental difference between TG and CD? 

I don't think so. When I  first crossdressed it was like I was like I was looking into someone else's eyes. I'm sure a lot of people feel that way. As far as differences, how about there's seven billion people on this planet and they're all unique with varying reasons for doing what they do. There are no hard and fast rules in this.

Hugs, Devlyn

Cross dressing always made me feel more like myself, even when I thought I was a kinky cis man.  When I realized I was trans and was dressing part-time, the different sides of my personality became more evident.  My male persona was quite repressed and depressed; my female persona was livelier and happier.  The back-and-forth became quite stressful.  I went full-time fairly quickly because I couldn't handle putting on that sad guy costume any longer.  But it was always me. 

Quote from: Julie Ross on June 29, 2017, 06:58:25 PM
I'm always reading about how when CDs get dressed up all of a sudden they're this other person, a femme take on who they are.  Sometimes the femme version is radically different.

When I put on women's clothing absolutely nothing changes whatsoever, it's the same person as Julie, maybe the low heels will change my walk.  I wasn't overboard butch in the first place and if I were to transition for real I might look into pointers on being more of a woman, and a new name would be in order, of course, but otherwise it's just ol' K**** with boobs.

Is this a fundamental difference between TG and CD?

It very well may be.  I have chosen not to transition, and I sort of feel like I have an alter ego sometimes.  When I get into Jessica mode I am definitely different.  I wouldn't say I am an entirely different person, but there are subtle differences with how I interact with people and how I think. 

Another possibility is that I have built this male persona (and it is pretty "butch" as you say), and when I am Jessica I am just being myself.  But I don't know.  You may be right.

I am still very much the same person I was before beginning transition.  A little more confident in my appearance and comfortable around people since starting, but that's about all I see.

I'm the same person in every form, the only thing that changes me is time and life. Otherwise, I don't have alter egos because of my looks.

I'm not sure about your question. I think the difference between crossdressers and transgender people is that one knows innately that one is woman. The other (CD) still believes he is male, and only partakes in it for entertainment like 'you change your mind, like a girl changes clothes'. There's really no comparison to one and the other besides the fact that CD wears female clothes on an occasion, and transgender women are women in the wrong body.

I am exactly the same as before transition. Except I'm happier now. I wasn't masculine at all so it's just physically that I've changed.

Yes and no.  Earlier on I used a different femme-name and definitely had a different personality.  Lately I seem more like just me.  I probably needed that earlier personality to initially meet the world and now I don't need it. :-\

No, I'm still the same... I still cross my legs, I still feel I'm feminine with or without my panties when I shower or even when I go to work!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

My post is directed at people like myself or KathyLauren in her early days who aren't exactly sure who they are.  I'm always searching for narratives from people who've gone exploring down this path, or hallmarks indicating that somebody is one or the other.  I did this post in a hurry, headed out the door for another electro appointment - I had to head straight from there to a friend's birthday party in drab, and got to wondering if my wearing male clothes around my electrologist for the first time would change our dynamic in some way, like I'd unconsciously want to boss her around in some manner (not in the slightest; actually she asked me for the first time if I was on hormones and we got to chatting about all kinds of TG stuff); this got me thinking about CDs and their alter egos, and wondering if TG people were like that, strange as it sounds; maybe it's as rare as CDs who are content to just wear jeans and shirts, instead of the fanciest threads they can find.

I didn't take any offense from your post. That's a valid question.

Quote from: Julie Ross on June 29, 2017, 06:58:25 PM
I'm always reading about how when CDs get dressed up all of a sudden they're this other person, a femme take on who they are.  Sometimes the femme version is radically different.

When I put on women's clothing absolutely nothing changes whatsoever, it's the same person as Julie, maybe the low heels will change my walk.  I wasn't overboard butch in the first place and if I were to transition for real I might look into pointers on being more of a woman, and a new name would be in order, of course, but otherwise it's just ol' K**** with boobs.

Is this a fundamental difference between TG and CD?

CDs are TG. You need to use the same terms that we all use on the site in order for the conversation to make sense. Thank you.

Hugs, Devlyn

Quote from: Susan on January 26, 2009, 10:04:38 PM

Community Definitions:

Transgender: an inclusive umbrella term which covers anyone who transcends their birth gender for any reason. This includes but is not limited to Androgynes, Crossdressers, Drag kings, Drag queens, Intersexuals, Transsexuals, and ->-bleeped-<-s.

Androgyne: An androgynous person

Androgynous: Being neither distinguishably masculine nor feminine, as in dress, appearance, or behavior.

Crossdresser: a person wears the clothing of the opposite gender, and has no desire to permanently change their sex. There is generally no sexual motivation for the cross-dressing.

Drag kings: performers, usually gay women or transgendered men - who dress in "drag," clothing associated with the male gender, usually highly exaggerated versions thereof. Drag kings often do drag to perform, singing or lip-syncing and dancing, participating in events such as gay pride parades, cabarets, discotheques, and other celebrations and venues.

Drag queens: performers, usually gay men or transgendered women - who dress in "drag," clothing associated with the female gender, usually highly exaggerated versions thereof. Drag queens often do drag to perform, singing or lip-syncing and dancing, participating in events such as gay pride parades, cabarets, discotheques, and other celebrations and venues.

Intersexual: a person born with the full or partial sex organs of both sexes; with underdeveloped or ambiguous sex organs; a sex chromosome karyotype other than XX or XY; or sex hormone receptor problems which prevent normal absorption of Estrogen or Androgens. Intersexual persons may seek to make their body as congruent as possible with the preferred sex through surgery and hormone treatments.

Significant other: for the purpose of this site, someone close to a person who is transgender. This may be a mother, father, son, daughter, sister, brother, family member, husband, wife, girlfriend, boyfriend, or friend.

Transsexual: a person who is mentally one gender, but has the body of the other. They desire to live and be accepted as a member of the mental gender, this is generally accompanied by the strong desire to make their body as congruent as possible with the preferred sex through surgery and hormone treatments.

->-bleeped-<-: a person who wears the clothing of the opposite gender, and has no desire to permanently change their sex. There is generally a strong sexual motivation for the cross-dressing.

Other terms:

Post-Ops: Transsexuals who have had surgical procedures to make their body as congruent as possible with their preferred sex. For MTF transsexuals this is generally considered to be after Genital surgery (GRS, orchiectomy, and/or penectomy), for FTM transsexuals it is generally considered to be after top surgery.

Pre-ops: Transsexuals who desire to to make their body as congruent as possible with their preferred sex, but have not yet had the surgical procedures for whatever reason.

This is not intended to be a glossary of all tg related terms. This just defines the make-up of the community on this site.

Proper Pronouns

Always use proper gender terms and pronouns based on the person's expressed self identity. Intentionally misgendering someone will result in a ban no matter what provocation you think you experienced.

For Male to Female Transsexuals: Male to Female transsexuals are women, and should be addressed in the feminine,  Brava instead of Bravo. recommended pronouns include She, Her, and Hers.

For Female to Male Transsexuals: Female to Male transsexuals are men, and should be addressed in the masculine Bravo instead of Brava. Recommended pronouns include He, Him, and His.

Gender Neutral: Whenever possible avoid the use feminine or masculine forms. Recommended pronouns include Them, They, and Their.

Note: ->-bleeped-<- and ->-bleeped-<- are considered extremely pejorative and should not be used on this site. Terms like Ladyboy should be limited to use in their specific cultural reference.

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Quote from: Chimili Anne on June 29, 2017, 11:22:55 PM
Yes and no.  Earlier on I used a different femme-name and definitely had a different personality.  Lately I seem more like just me.  I probably needed that earlier personality to initially meet the world and now I don't need it. :-\

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I had to think about this one a while.  The truth is that before HRT I did have an alter ego.  With HRT I no longer have one.  The one ego I have now is also not exactly the same as either of the ones I had before.  They seem to have merged somewhere in the center.  For me this is a huge result because I felt positively schizophrenic before and often wondered if I was simply insane.


Conform and be dull. —James Frank Dobie, The Voice of the Coyote

Quote from: Julie Ross on June 29, 2017, 06:58:25 PM
Is this a fundamental difference between TG and CD?

I think it's more of a difference between TG and TS.
Although TS is TG but not exclusively.

Too bad I can't say 'between TV and TS' but I don't think TV a very acceptable term anymore.
Uh oh. I've waded into a minefield.
Help!!!

Don't worry,  I've been in the minefield plenty of times.  :laugh:

I'm still very new to having a trans identity.  I can say that I don't have an alter ego, however, I do know that I have different affected personalities.  There is definitely a sort of puffed up masculine thing I do when in certain company.  And then in very special company (family and closest friends) I am much more flamboyant and feminine.  I remember my brother said I was 'very queenie' at one point.  I take after my mom, who is pretty flamboyant ;) 

but I don't have names for these different modes of being. 

Quote from: Jane Emily on June 30, 2017, 10:43:17 AM
I think it's more of a difference between TG and TS.
Although TS is TG but not exclusively.

Too bad I can't say 'between TV and TS' but I don't think TV a very acceptable term anymore.
Uh oh. I've waded into a minefield.
Help!!!

But TV and CD are different though. TV does it from the carnal pleasures of human nature of dressing like a woman.

Hi Devlyn, sorry for mixing up terminology like that.  When I first posted here the videos from the Transition Channel were recommended viewing from a moderator and Alexis uses TG in the more narrow sense I did here - as someone who has dysphoria about their body, which certainly isn't true of CDs.  That definition stuck in my mind and I've been using it that way in conversations.  And then others define TG as those who use hormones and make other minor modifications of their body and have a female persona, but don't want SRS.  And there a few other definitions too, I think...

I just finalized a July 12 appointment to start HRT, too.   ;D  So I'm TG now, will be, I don't know, doubleplus TG afterwards.   ??? 

Just as a word "->-bleeped-<-" always sounded acceptably clinical to me.  I have plenty of negative associations with it from 50s/60s pop culture though and can see why so many wanted a replacement for it.

Thanks for all these interesting replies!

I felt kind of the opposite.

Before transitionning... it was like I was faking who I was... I was trying to fit in a gender role that wasn't mine... that made me a very quiet and shy person... I felt I couldn't let myself out... and then I tried to be someone else.

I was always who I am today, but I was hidden deep inside my "masculine personna", a kind of "alter-ego", yes.

Transitioning allowed me to fully embrace who I am. Now I am myself in and out, all the time!

Both of my therapists have asked me "What would be different if Joanne showed up for work tomorrow?". My reflexive answer was Nothing. OK a few jaws will need to be picked up off the floor. I'd still be the same me. Just feeling, or better yet, being 100% genuine.

About the only times I do have an alter ego is when I am fully presenting as female and sometimes refer to my male life as my alter ego. Pre-everything, there was Waaaaaaay too much stuffing to even allow the concept of a female alter ego.