Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Hi! This is my first time really joining a community for trans people, since I only came out to my friends recently, but not with my family. I identify as male, but I don't fit the "always knew" and "always liked cars and not dolls" story, so I never thought I was trans. For most of my life, I found my discomfort confusing and I tried to ignore it. I identified as nonbinary once I found out that was a thing, probably around 2009, but that never felt quite right and just felt like dipping my toe into saying "hey I'm not a girl!" for me.

I've always been really interested in makeup, unusual hairstyles, and alternative/androgynous fashion. Once I got into goth music and later into visual kei, I realized there are all kinds of men, even cis men, that had the same kind of interests as me and were considered "man enough" while doing so. It was a big revelation, even though at the time I didn't understand why it was important to me, so I got really deeply into that kind of fashion. It's a really important part of how I express myself and how I find a balance with my interests and identity.

I'm always worried about not being "trans enough" or that I'm not "trying hard enough" to pass, so even now I'm afraid of rejection on this forum. I'm hoping I find a few people who relate or at least accept me here.

Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey, welcome here, I'm new so I can't be of much help, but for my understanding, everyone is welcome.
Don't worry about your doubts, we are here to talk and try to understand ourselves, not judge others.
See you around :3

Quote from: Saturniids on August 11, 2017, 05:40:03 PM
Hi! This is my first time really joining a community for trans people, since I only came out to my friends recently, but not with my family. I identify as male, but I don't fit the "always knew" and "always liked cars and not dolls" story, so I never thought I was trans. For most of my life, I found my discomfort confusing and I tried to ignore it. I identified as nonbinary once I found out that was a thing, probably around 2009, but that never felt quite right and just felt like dipping my toe into saying "hey I'm not a girl!" for me.

I've always been really interested in makeup, unusual hairstyles, and alternative/androgynous fashion. Once I got into goth music and later into visual kei, I realized there are all kinds of men, even cis men, that had the same kind of interests as me and were considered "man enough" while doing so. It was a big revelation, even though at the time I didn't understand why it was important to me, so I got really deeply into that kind of fashion. It's a really important part of how I express myself and how I find a balance with my interests and identity.

I'm always worried about not being "trans enough" or that I'm not "trying hard enough" to pass, so even now I'm afraid of rejection on this forum. I'm hoping I find a few people who relate or at least accept me here.

Hi Saturniids, welcome to Susan's Place! Rest assured you won't be rejected here. I'm non-binary, maybe genderfluid, maybe something else. It's all good.  :)  See you around the site!

Hugs, Devlyn

A hearty welcome to Susan's, Saturniids. Always be yourself and don't compare yourself to others. Hope you enjoy the time here.

:)

Hello Saturniids, welcome to Susan's! 

Wherever you decide is best for you along the gender spectrum is truly the best answer - especially here.  Your answer might change over time, nothing wrong with that.  There is no contest for who is "trans enough" - and as far as I'm concerned, there shouldn't be any such thing as we all need to define this for ourselves.  The main thing is learn about yourself and make decisions that will be best for you in the long run - that is what I have done and people here have been very helpful.  I also recommend talk to a qualified gender therapist or counselor if you have access to one.

I am MTF but many of the questions and solutions I have discovered are from FTM and non-binary members of Susan's Place.  We all have so much in common. 

We always provide some information to new members, and I will add it here for you.  This helps speed up initial navigation around Susan's and keeps everything running smoothly. 

A Cautionary Note:
This is a public forum so please remember when posting that The Internet Never Forgets, and the various web crawlers and archival sites out there may retain information that you post.

We cannot ensure that any information you share on the site will be protected from public view and/or copying or reproduction. This warning is also listed in the Terms of Service listed below.

If you give out personal information on Susan's you are responsible for any consequence.

I also want to share some links with you. They include helpful information and the rules that govern the site.  It is important for your enjoyment of the site to take a moment to go through them

Site Terms of Service & Rules to Live By (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,2.0.html)	Standard Terms & Definitions (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,54369.0.html)	Post Ranks (including when you can upload an avatar) (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,114.0.html.)
Reputation rules (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,18960.0.html)	News posting & quoting guidelines (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,174951.0.html)	Photo, avatars, & signature images policy (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,59974.msg383866.html#msg383866)

Great to meet you Saturniids, and so good to know you are working on truly becoming you.

Kendra

Welcome to Susan's Place. On this site there is no such thing as not trans enough. This site is intended for you to explore your feelings and discover what is right for you. Should a member become critical of this process, there is a report to moderator button on the right side of every post. Pressing that button will start a report to the staff and we will step in as needed. Fortunately most members on the site are well behaved and we know about those who aren't.

Now we may give you a little encouragement (aka shove) but in the end it has to be your decision as to what you are and where you want to go.

Hi Saturniids,

  I'm Laurie, MtF. I like to think I'm a greeter here but it's all in my head so I'll just give the old unofficial Welcome to Susan's Place. Come right in. Don't be shy most of us don't bite and those that do risk attracting the attention of the staff. Though they be a good lot, attracting attention for the wrong reasons isn't advised.
  Trans enough huh? Like we haven't heard that before.... from just about every new person that we meet.  Don't feel bad about questioning that for your self. No one else can tell you that. It is something you will need to answer for yourself.
  When I joined so many moons ago (last January) I had much the same thoughts and struggled with it. I was told the same things you are hearing. I had felt my decision to become the woman I always wished I could be, (wished mind you, not was or trapped in a male body) was a hasty spur of the moment kind of thing. And yes I questioned if I was trans enough. But hey I went with it , told my doctor, was referred to a shrink for mental assessment, and forwarded on to a gender therapist and you know what? Every one of them agreed with me  being trans enough. Yep I got in in writing  "Diagnosis: Gender Dysphoria"  I Qualified!
   If you are questioning and are not getting help from a gender therapist I suggest it being a good place to start. I'm talking to mine again on Monday. A gender therapist can be a good resource for you and they are good for more than just affirmation of your being one of us. You are already one of us. You are here aren't you? I hope you'll like it here and stay.

  Hugs,
    Laurie

Hi Saturniids  :icon_wave:

Welcome to Susan's Place  :)  Glad to have you here, join on in the fun

Hugs

V M