Community Conversation => Transgender talk => Topic started by: Hartman4 on October 14, 2017, 11:28:37 PM Return to Full Version
Title: Confused
Post by: Hartman4 on October 14, 2017, 11:28:37 PM
Post by: Hartman4 on October 14, 2017, 11:28:37 PM
Hi, I have a question hopefully someone can help me with. I am a straight woman dating a transmale. We've been together for 6 months now. I've always had an issue with him watching porn and just recently found out that he watches gay male porn. I asked him if he was bi-sexual and he says no that he is only into women but likes to watch gay male porn. Do you think he is being honest with me? In the back of my mind I say no.....
Title: Re: Confused
Post by: Roll on October 14, 2017, 11:43:41 PM
Post by: Roll on October 14, 2017, 11:43:41 PM
It is impossible for us to say what is in his mind and heart on the issue, but there are certainly many, many straight identifying men who watch gay porn just as there are many, many straight identifying women who watch lesbian porn. The latter statistic has been proven by scientific data, though the former is hard to quantify due to the nature of stigma attached with men being sexually fluid to some degree (whereas it is almost expected of women).
Given that he is trans, things might get a little more complex on the issue, as I know it has certainly clouded my view of gender attraction, as when it comes to women I honestly don't know what is natural attraction and what is socialization and male hormones.
I'd say give him the benefit of the doubt, and be aware of and accept that it may very well just be simple fantasy. But if you truly have doubts, speak with him some more about the issue. Maybe he can offer something that sets your mind at ease if you show that it truly worries you.
Given that he is trans, things might get a little more complex on the issue, as I know it has certainly clouded my view of gender attraction, as when it comes to women I honestly don't know what is natural attraction and what is socialization and male hormones.
I'd say give him the benefit of the doubt, and be aware of and accept that it may very well just be simple fantasy. But if you truly have doubts, speak with him some more about the issue. Maybe he can offer something that sets your mind at ease if you show that it truly worries you.
Title: Re: Confused
Post by: Dena on October 15, 2017, 12:03:31 AM
Post by: Dena on October 15, 2017, 12:03:31 AM
Welcome to Susan's Place. It's difficult to know what he is feeling as testosterone can really spike a persons sex drive. If he is fairly new to testosterone, there could be some experimentation until it settles down. What I would suggest is if this relationship becomes serious, you consider couples consoling to be sure that this issue is resolved.
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