Susan's Place Transgender Resources

I've been feeling this on and off for a long time, and I'm sure it's down to me being unable to pass in social situations.. But even online where passing is of course far easier, once I drop the 'trans' bomb the reactions are very similar to in person!

What I'm talking about is how men often see me as I suppose a chance to have sex with someone who has a penis, but still not be gay.. Or I don't know what its about exactly, but once I let them know I'm post-op a lot of them are completely turned off me. I suppose then I'm only a slightly uglier and less desirable regular chick? With women they tend to just not see me as a woman -or at least not an equal. I'm simply too female for straight women, and not female enough for gay women.. And its driving me nuts! Anyone else experience something similar to this, or am I misunderstanding the situation completely?

Oh and for those thinking '..doesn't Floof have a girlfriend?!' the answer is yes. It's just been bothering me recently, and I wanted to put it out there and see if others can relate. Thanks <3

Kinda... Here lately it seem like I'm in limbo where I'm too much for one side and not enough for the other... Except as a novelty, or future possibility.

While these things just add to the daily struggle they also add fuel to the fire (so to speak) and reinforcing the resolve of getting to that point.

To a point I think I see where you are coming from and currently I'm going through some things that feel similar.

My questions at this point are: how do you contend with these situations? And, is there a way that you have found that works best for both the situation and for mental health sake?

Now I do realize that rarely is there a "one size fits all" solution, but maybe what you (and others) have found to be optimal could help open the doors for others.

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I definitely feel like one at times, especially to the people who think it's fashionable to be your ally.

"You're trans?  Oh muh gawd you are soooooo braaaaaaave!" (this is where my skin starts to crawl)  "It's so amazing how you're doing this to show people who you really are!"
And then they treat me like a guy because that's what they see me as after they find out. 

I was treated like a curiosity for about a week.   Since then, I'm just one of the girls.

        This is something I will be learning about soon I just found out yesterday that I was outed at work by a former coworker I this small town of 500 everyone else may already know I am not sure yet as I have been mostly house bound for the last 6 weeks  It will be interesting at the very least


    bobbisue :)

Frankly I coudn't understand why men (and women) desired me when I was thought female, that made even less sense to me than the current situation. What makes people's brain's light up in that way (aside from hormones) will always be a mystery.

Quote from: Floof on December 08, 2017, 05:48:40 AM
What I'm talking about is how men often see me as I suppose a chance to have sex with someone who has a penis, but still not be gay.. Or I don't know what its about exactly, but once I let them know I'm post-op a lot of them are completely turned off me. I suppose then I'm only a slightly uglier and less desirable regular chick? With women they tend to just not see me as a woman -or at least not an equal. I'm simply too female for straight women, and not female enough for gay women.. And its driving me nuts! Anyone else experience something similar to this, or am I misunderstanding the situation completely?

Floof yes I have felt this even before, reason being for me is I watched a lot of trans-women as cam models. I saw this treatment a lot among the guys. They loved the ones that were pre-op and often would be offended when a woman says she was trans and didn't have her old equipment. Then the girls that came in these rooms were sometimes understanding or yes treated them as second class women. I have experienced some of this at my work already with guys that try to flirt with me or just blatantly tell they would like to sleep with a girl with a penis. With women I kind of get the feeling from both sides some completely accept me as a woman and some I completely offend, especially when I use the restroom. I can totally relate to your post and I don't think you are misunderstanding the situation at all. It's just fact.

 Hi Wild Flower,

  I'm afraid I cannot help you with this question. I've never been in any such situation, nor am I likely to. My social life remains here on this site among friends. I don't have your youth nor your pretty looks. I've mixed feelings on that, on one hand I envy the younger ladies here, and on the other I'm thankful I won't have such concerns. Being older can have a few advantages.
  All I can do for you in this, is to send you a (((Hug)) and provide some moral support for you, as you weather this challenge.

Hugs,
   Laurie

I've always been a curiosity. I was always the tallest guy in the room. Now, I'm the tallest girl in the room. And I  don't give a hang. I'm for once happy in my own skin.

Quote from: DawnOday on December 08, 2017, 02:12:25 PM
I've always been a curiosity. I was always the tallest guy in the room. Now, I'm the tallest girl in the room. And I  don't give a hang. I'm for once happy in my own skin.

I agree there. I've never cared what people think really. Just want to get past the stage of looking neither one nor the other! People get mightily confused. Small breasts, curves suggestive but not quite, muscle that suggests something else. For all of that I'm happy exactly the way I am for the first time in a very long time.

All the time.....I'm not passable. At least not yet. No matter where I go, I get stared at.

Yes, totally the majority of the guys I have talked to and meet want to "try me " to see what it is like. The want the male part with female look. Most of them get upset when I turn them down because of that.

Well, for starters the person would show an incredible amount of interest, and once I tell them I'm trans, the interest cuts down significantly. They'll go from 5 phone calls a day to maybe 1 phone call every other day in the flick of a switch, and the topic will always be about sex. "Will you do this? Will you do that?"

Doesn't bother me though. Their loss. I will never have sex with someone I'm not in love with, so they won't get what they want anyways. I am glad though that it brings out their character. It shows them for what they are. Sex seeking freaks that do not value people as human beings. I like that I have a way of bringing that out early without having to sh#% test.