Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Has there always been trans people in your life? (Probably not.)
When did you meet others like you for the first time?
How did that make you feel?
Do you have many trans friends (in real life)?
Do trans friends offer you something more that cis friends can't?

---
As for me - I have never met any trans people in my life.
I've only ever had a couple of email friends. And now you.
Hence the immense need to ask questions...

But so far I'm feeling great  ;D! Maybe peer support rocks after all...

My addiction to this forum is starting to show unhealthy consequences...!

My first brush with ->-bleeped-<- was at high school. One of my best friends was transitioning to be a girl and had to petition to be allowed to wear the girls uniform.

I know quite a few transgendered people now. In real life they are all MTF's and online, in my friends I have a few FTM's which is refreshing.

Trans people are just normal people and offer me friendship just like cis people.

I first met another trans person several months ago. A 16 year old who came into work to have her hair done. She's the only trans person I've met in person. We text and stay in touch.

When I was younger I hooked up with a transgirl and we would talk a bit but that was more of a friends with benifits thing I did have a crush on her and wish she was still around but our lifestyles where differant plus she moved to states to do movies, I have meet some at my endocrinologist office I dont have any trans friends that I have meet in person per say

At my first support group meeting.  We started talking immediately.  She had transitioned with srs already and was beautiful.  She came from similar family experience.  She asked if I was thinking of srs.  I said I don't think so and maybe I sounded a bit defiant.  She said to another that I sounded just like her 1 year ago.  That statement has stuck in my mind.  Here I am 5 months later and definitely not saying no defiantly any longer.
Smiles, Jessica 🙋‍♀️

Has there always been trans people in your life?
Nope. Had no clue about transsexual people for the most part of my existence.
When did you meet others like you for the first time?
Like me? Never, I am an individual :P  Other transsexual people? 2016.
How did that make you feel?
Didn't make me feel anything to be honest! The first I ever met (beginning of 2016) weren't on my wavelength at all and I didn't really like them and didn't want to see them again just because they happened to have the same medical problem, hence I didn't stay in contact.
I then went to a group over a year later (end of 2017) and met some people there one can have interesting and nice conversations with so far. 
Do you have many trans friends (in real life)?
I don't have an actual friend who is trans. 
Do trans friends offer you something more that cis friends can't?
I don't know if they could. The few friends I have are cis.

I didn't even know changing gender was a thing...

When I was younger all I knew was that there were men who dressed as women for whatever reason, I didn't even understand my feelings, so I started doing some research and found that some women were men in the past, it started making noise in my head, I was very closeminded in the past, so when I thought about transgender I usually thought about some ugly point inbetween men and women, because where I live that is a very strong stereotype, what made me decide to do it was forums like this one with so many pretty people who successfully changed their gender and most importantly, continued with their lives, it wasn't an end all situation.

some friends did know some transgender girls and I was kinda sad because one of the girls they showed me in pictures was a bomb, incredibly beautiful and working as a model (me being more of a "girl next door" it hurt my selfsteem).

so, I'm the only transgender in the family and in my circle of friends, in fact the first transgender girl I ever saw other than myself was a girl in the subway when I was in mexico city, the poor girl matched all the stereotypes of my country, but it was good knowing that I'm not a rare breed of people, I wish there were other trans people near me, even if I don't look trans myself that much

About two months prior to speaking to my therapist. I met a new friend by the name of Chris-deee. I have to admit I was uncomfortable. Not because she was trans but because I am never comfortable with anyone. Chris did answer many questions however. I hope we will meet again. Thank you Chris. Since then I attend support meetings at the Ingersoll Gender Center where the usual attendance is between 40 and 60 a session. I also went to Gender Odyssey where there were 1700 trans, SO's and allies in attendance. This was the singular most affirming situation in my life. For once I felt I was not alone.

Quote from: Alanna1990 on December 12, 2017, 03:21:04 PM
I wish there were other trans people near me, even if I don't look trans myself that much

Look thru this list to find a support group in your area. If you can't find one, pm me and I will do a more in depth look. The list in the US is pretty much up to date. https://www.susans.org/links/Local_Support_Groups_&_Organizations//

Oddly enough pretty late in the game. First time I really talked to another openly trans person was over a year after admitting it to myself. Then again nothing for 6 month until last week...

I may have seen a few more in the meantime but not talked to....

Quote from: DawnOday on December 12, 2017, 03:29:48 PM
Look thru this list to find a support group in your area. If you can't find one, pm me and I will do a more in depth look. The list in the US is pretty much up to date. https://www.susans.org/links/Local_Support_Groups_&_Organizations//

thanks, but I'm from mexico, if you're not pretty people still kill you here, so pretty much all the transgender folk stay more or less hidden

https://www.susans.org/wiki/LGBT_rights_in_Mexico   
http://www.refworld.org/docid/50753f172.html Here are some rights reference material for Mexico.

Quote from: DawnOday on December 12, 2017, 05:29:30 PM
https://www.susans.org/wiki/LGBT_rights_in_Mexico   
http://www.refworld.org/docid/50753f172.html Here are some rights reference material for Mexico.

Thanks... but I know all this already, in mexico all of this is just dead words, most people discriminate A LOT if you are not cisgender, the cities where there are more laws protecting LGBT folk are where the most murders and other crimes ocur.

Where I live it is the worst state regarding LGBT rights and bastion of the "National Front for the Family" (an anti-LGBT group with a lot of power in the government) even if a national law was already passed to protect everybody here the local laws say otherwise and they refuse with all their might to change them, you can ask anybody and almost every men will thell you "f$&%@ng gays, they should be killed", women are more more accepting, but they also have it tough here, what the laws say is one thing, but what really happens here is totally different, it's one of those cases where the laws are trying to force acceptance on the population but their hatred is a lot more than the laws can handle, the laws are so accepting that I was able to legally change my name in just two weeks no questions asked so that is not an issue.

I'm mostly safe because I pass on public and I thank god for that.

The first trans person in my life, that I knew of anyway, was the keynote speaker at a convention, just over two years ago.  I didn't actually meet her, but seeing her deliver her talk with confidence and without derogatory comments in the audience gave me the confidence to consider whether I was trans.

Now, of course, I have many trans people in my life, both in real life and online, MTF, FTM, and NB.

Quote from: Alanna1990 on December 12, 2017, 08:13:06 PM
Thanks... but I know all this already, in mexico all of this is just dead words, most people discriminate A LOT if you are not cisgender, the cities where there are more laws protecting LGBT folk are where the most murders and other crimes ocur.

Where I live it is the worst state regarding LGBT rights and bastion of the "National Front for the Family" (an anti-LGBT group with a lot of power in the government) even if a national law was already passed to protect everybody here the local laws say otherwise and they refuse with all their might to change them, you can ask anybody and almost every men will thell you "f$&%@ng gays, they should be killed", women are more more accepting, but they also have it tough here, what the laws say is one thing, but what really happens here is totally different, it's one of those cases where the laws are trying to force acceptance on the population but their hatred is a lot more than the laws can handle, the laws are so accepting that I was able to legally change my name in just two weeks no questions asked so that is not an issue.

I'm mostly safe because I pass on public and I thank god for that.

Sigh... I'm so sorry to hear that  :'(! What I hear is that Mexico has a lot of issues when it comes to human rights & safety...! Unfortunately!!! All the best for you! Hang in there! And try to keep yourself safe!
Hugs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  Mr PW,

  Wolfie, my first was another member here who dared me to meet her at my first mtf support meeting. Her name is Tessa.James. I also talked to another mtf there. I have since gone on to meet 10 other members of Susan's Place on that little road trip I mentioned to you elsewhere. I have more to meet and some to revisit if they will let me.

Hugs,
   Larie

I've never met another trans person that I am aware of. Honestly, I've only met a handful of even LGB people who were openly LGB, and that was only in passing. Just one of those types of areas.

I met a number of folks who were what we now call transgender in the San Francisco Tenderloin neighborhood when I was about 15 and was running around the city on my own.  I was likely one of them, as when I got off the local bus in the TransBay Terminal when I went to the city, I'd brush my hair out and put on a long embroidered top to go better with my bell-bottoms before I left the terminal. 

The first time I met someone I knew was transgender as an adult was in 1985, while interviewing people for an engineering position.  I had suppressed myself following some treatments I got as a teen, not very successfully.  While I was wrapping up the interview session, the thought crossed my mind that she was being very brave, and I wished that I could do that.  My subconscious had outed me to myself.

Quote from: Alanna1990 on December 12, 2017, 08:13:06 PM
Thanks... but I know all this already, in mexico all of this is just dead words, most people discriminate A LOT if you are not cisgender, the cities where there are more laws protecting LGBT folk are where the most murders and other crimes ocur.

Where I live it is the worst state regarding LGBT rights and bastion of the "National Front for the Family" (an anti-LGBT group with a lot of power in the government) even if a national law was already passed to protect everybody here the local laws say otherwise and they refuse with all their might to change them, you can ask anybody and almost every men will thell you "f$&%@ng gays, they should be killed", women are more more accepting, but they also have it tough here, what the laws say is one thing, but what really happens here is totally different, it's one of those cases where the laws are trying to force acceptance on the population but their hatred is a lot more than the laws can handle, the laws are so accepting that I was able to legally change my name in just two weeks no questions asked so that is not an issue.

I'm mostly safe because I pass on public and I thank god for that.

Alanna  It is sad that people think they are better, especially when it has nothing to do with them. I hope that this will come to pass. You are beautiful. You really are. I won't give up looking for a resource for you, where you are accepted for the lovely person you are.


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There were trans people in my high school if I remember correctly.

We never talked so I don't know if we had much in common. I know someone I was friends with in middle school transitioned mtf and we later reconnected for a day. She seemed happy at the time- I remember once before transitioning she teasingly mentioned something about me having long hair and was laughing. I didnt't really cross my mind much at the time. I thought it would be too hard of a thing for me to go through and that if I wanted to make it in life I had to stay the way I was..

I have trans friends now but they aren't any different than anyone else.

You're on a roll with these questions threads and they're all really good!

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Quote from: dist123 on December 14, 2017, 06:16:20 PM
You're on a roll with these questions threads and they're all really good!

Thanks  :)!

A relative of mine. Met around June this year. Happened to be using the same GIC and encountered in the waiting room.

The first trans person I met was my roommate for srs in Montreal.  He is still a good friend and he and I communicate daily, usually on snapchat.  Other than that, I did not know, or have,any trans friends in my life before him, and none since. :)

There hasn't always been trans people in my life.
I honestly didn't get to meet other trans folks until my Freshman year of college and I didn't come out until the end of my second semester.
Honestly I am so grateful to all of the trans people I have met because they have helped me figure out myself. I would say almost all of my friends are trans or NB and I honestly prefer it that way. I feel there is a deeper, more intimate connection with my trans friends. They understand what being trans is like, whereas cis people don't

I also feel the addiction of this forum beginning! lol

Quote from: PurpleWolf on December 12, 2017, 02:28:38 PM
Has there always been trans people in your life? (Probably not.)
When did you meet others like you for the first time?
How did that make you feel?
Do you have many trans friends (in real life)?
Do trans friends offer you something more that cis friends can't?

Has there always been trans people in my life?
No
When did I meet others like me for the first time?
In San Francisco on the trolley, but I didn't even know what I was or who at the time.
How did that make me feel?
It made me feel awkward. This trans female wasn't working on her voice (at least I don't think so....). When she spoke to me and my classmates she had a deeper voice than any of us, but she was beautiful. Being from Mississippi none of us had seen anyone like her. Most called her a ->-bleeped-<-. At the time I didn't know about it and I wasn't questioning yet. I had done some crossdressing but, nothing further. It was almost like an episode of Maury.
Do you have many trans friends in rl?
Yes, now that I have found the local group and everyone seems to have a trans friend they want me to network with now. So yes, I have a few now! :)
Do my trans friends offer something more than my cis ones?
Yes, it is a fraternity if you will. We all have common threads we can relate to each other whether male/female. We get each other on somewhat of a deeper level. "I mean some cis still think of us as weird/strange." We can talk shop (i.e. transition, what we are changing in life, operations)? So absolutely my trans friends offer a little more than my cis friends, but I wouldn't trade any of them for someone else. They are still friends and offer a friendship. I mean with a cis person I might not share my whole life and why I know I am trans but, a brother or sister I can do that with more openly.

Saw a few trans women as a kid traveling but the encounter that stuck with me was more recent. Young girl came by at work with family on vacation or something I was a bit surprised when they used male pononuns. No way was that person anything but a young girl. Long blonde hair pink hoodie overwhelmingly feminine body language. Didn't want to assume though so I avoided gendering them either way. But to me it was shocking I did a double take and noticed that they did have a more male form - to me that didn't matter anyone who placed that person as male was delusional. I still wonder if I should have been 'purposfully unobservant ' and called her miss. Perhaps it would have made their day. :-\

At least so far as I know, the first time meeting another trans person was my first trip to a support group in St Louis. I have come to understand there are a lot more of us than I ever realized. If you do the math, about 1 in every 300 people is likely in the transgender spectrum.

It's nice knowing I am not alone!  :)

As an adult, I have occasionally seen cross dressers who may have been trans but I didn't meet them.  The only person I've met who I'm pretty sure was trans was a primary school friend.  We secretly dressed up together, mostly in his mother's old clothes, although they were mostly too large for us.  It did feel good to have a friend like me.  In high school I was afraid of being bullied even more, so I tried to avoid effeminate boys.  My loss.  Some of them initiated conversations with me.  We didn't talk about any trans or sex related stuff, so I don't know whether they were trans, gay or just effeminate straight males (they do exist, I'm sure).

In person? None that I recall. There might have been some in the gay clubs of the 90's, but I think a lot of the people there were cross dressers mainly. They didn't interest my all that much at the time, I was there for a totally different reason.

Hey, now I can reply to this thread finally  :D!

The first trans person I spoke to was my therapist and that was online... so that doesn't count maybe.

But I just recently met a guy I met online. I've seen them erm... 5 times so far ;D! Plus been writing quite a lot with them! I can honestly say that befriending them has been invaluable. First and foremost they are my friend of course, like any other friend I might have. But yes I do think it's great they know exactly what I'm going through and can relate to everything. Same as you guys here! Talking to other trans people is different to friends in general because we share something, a common experience. That's huge imo. I think other trans people can provide peer support in a way cis people of course can't. But cis people can be exactly as supportive friends.

I also went to an LGBT group for the first time. There were other trans guys there as well. So it did make some profound effect on me because seeing those other people in the exact same situation as me, and pre-T etc., I felt immediately much more normal. I felt I was like them in every way. Meeting with them actually got rid of the last drop of doubt I had. It was a great experience!

Also, as a side note, being treated and respected as my true self by others felt huge!!! Of course there were cis people there also.

While I am certain that I had met other trans people and was just oblivious to the fact that they are trans, The first openly trans person who I was aware of their trans status was trans drag entertainer who I met when I was 19. I remember being in awe of her beauty and desperately tried to strike up a conversation with her.  Many years later she would become a close friend of mine and one of my most beloved confidantes.

The first time I know I meet a trans person was on a telephone chat line I was on the male side and she was on the female side and we meet and fooled around together and had a few dates I was a lot young I think 17ish  I really did like her at the time and wish things would have worked out

There were trans people in my high school. They were andro though I believe. One of my friends transitioned but we went to different schools. I was always very supportive, I just couldn't get my mind to accept that could be my path. Looking back I truly did envy them all. But hey, I'm a little late but here I am. Growing my hair and on hrt for 6 months at 27... gotta start somewhere. I'm halfway to a year which saying that sounds kinda crazy to me.

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I never have met another Trans person. It would be nice to meet someone more like me so I would have someone to talk to. Friends would be a nice addition in my life right about now. I believe I am the only one in our town.

Quote from: PurpleWolf on December 12, 2017, 02:28:38 PM
Has there always been trans people in your life? (Probably not.)
When did you meet others like you for the first time?
How did that make you feel?
Do you have many trans friends (in real life)?
Do trans friends offer you something more that cis friends can't?

Nope, I didn't have any trans friends that I knew about before transitioning.

I met other transgender people for the first time at the local Trans Support group I joined.  We get together three times a month, and often at other trans-related things.  I'm hoping to see some at Transgender Day of Visibility event this coming Saturday!

To know that I wasn't alone, that it wasn't something I was the only one in the world feeling this way was SO enlightening!

I have some trans friends IRL, but we more hang out at trans-related things, and a few come to the local anime club I'm involved with. 

Oh man, the comments we make about the ignorance of many cis people while in group!  Of course, I'd never repeat them to an actual cis person, but it feels good to be able to say things that only other trans people understand!  To be able to get the frustrations, rude comments and more off of your chest and to have others say they've experienced something similar, or to pat you on the back after a bad time dealing with cis people, its like nothing I've experienced in the rest of the world.  To be able to be in a group of people that have had similar experiences, thought or felt similar and understand where, why and how you are living your life as a trans person is something that I hope everyone on this forum can one day find.

Ryuichi 

Properly met and spoke to in a real way? One of my doctors who facilitates my HRT, I met almost 2 years ago.

Quote from: PurpleWolf on March 28, 2018, 09:47:38 PM
Hey, now I can reply to this thread finally  :D!

The first trans person I spoke to was my therapist and that was online... so that doesn't count maybe.

But I just recently met a guy I met online. I've seen them erm... 5 times so far ;D! Plus been writing quite a lot with them! I can honestly say that befriending them has been invaluable. First and foremost they are my friend of course, like any other friend I might have. But yes I do think it's great they know exactly what I'm going through and can relate to everything. Same as you guys here! Talking to other trans people is different to friends in general because we share something, a common experience. That's huge imo. I think other trans people can provide peer support in a way cis people of course can't. But cis people can be exactly as supportive friends.

I also went to an LGBT group for the first time. There were other trans guys there as well. So it did make some profound effect on me because seeing those other people in the exact same situation as me, and pre-T etc., I felt immediately much more normal. I felt I was like them in every way. Meeting with them actually got rid of the last drop of doubt I had. It was a great experience!

Also, as a side note, being treated and respected as my true self by others felt huge!!! Of course there were cis people there also.

Quote from: krobinson103 on December 16, 2017, 12:53:58 PM
In person? None that I recall. There might have been some in the gay clubs of the 90's, but I think a lot of the people there were cross dressers mainly. They didn't interest my all that much at the time, I was there for a totally different reason.

Chris is the fist crossdresser I met. We met for coffee. Her hair was freshly styled. Nails freshly painted. I was hesitant because I haven't been social with anyone let alone another crossdresser. She was kind of nervous of where we met. So we went to a location she was familiar with over by the mall. I really admired her freedom of expression. She was very generous with her time. About six weeks later I had my letter for treatment. When Kristi my therapist asked if I wanted to start HRT. I did not hesitate. Now 19 months and haven't stroked out. Anyway Chris wants to go in the next hour and I need to plan in advance. Because I watch my grand baby. But we will meet again.

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does it count if there are people i knew at school who also transitioned after we left school, even though when i knew them they were presenting as/ thought they were cis? cause I know at least one person from then...

other than that, about 18 months ago when i came back to uni. a guy referred to himself as trans out of nowhere and I was so surprised i probably came off as super transphobic lol

obviously there will have been people i met that i didn't know where trans too

The first I met (that I was aware of) was at a pride parade. I was actually deeply in the closet back then and actively anti-LGBT in so many ways, mostly from fear and indoctrination. My ex who was not an ex at the time convinced me to go together with them to the local pride parade. At least I was still pretty laid-back then like I am now, so I didn't make a big deal out of it. I met a FtM man there who was really cool and... well, hot. We actually chatted a bit and that managed to knock away the first chink in my many ill-informed prejudices. It turned out that trans people are normal people after all, and the stories I heard before then were complete crap. I'm glad I met him, because I might not have found the courage to come out otherwise. I wish I could meet him again so I could tell him thank you.

Never let anyone tell you that pride parades don't have a positive impact today. One helped me find a reason to keep living.

some 45 years ago when I was a runaway in Dallas. Was searching for some kind of affirmation in the gay community back then. Did not find any there. Those cute gay guys would always run when I let my girl loose...duh !!! they wanted a gay GUY !!!  lol I remember that young girl well. I was quite proud of her even way back then. Neither of us had any real info or support, and I had not even come to grips with my own gender issues back then. A sweet memory tho :) ty for posting this.

And of course when I started my transition, met many in my support group .

In real life? Em... never. Yep. Kinda sad, right?

I have never met another trans person yet. I have a friend that started to transition 3 years ago but I haven't seen her sense then. We still text on messenger though.

Hugs,
     Chelsea

I know of three trans people, but I don't know any in person. It's a bit of a bummer, really.