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Hi girls,

I am 7 months on HRT (estradiol + spiro - full dosage - levels are correct) and I have experienced many physical changes however my emotions have not changed as drastically as some people have suggested.

The thing is that I am diagnosed with pretty severe BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) and my mood/emotions were always heightened and fluctuating pre transition so maybe that's why I havn't noticed a drastic change.

Any other girls out there with emotional instability/sensitive mood type pre-transition meaning there wasn't much change after-transition?

I feel like I'm the only one who hasn't experienced this new feminine perspective to their emotions/thought process. :(

Don't sweat it.  Estrogen changes your body.  Experience changes your thinking. 

Never look for perspective in a pill bottle.  I know there are a lot of people here who speak as if HRT is instant happy sauce, but don't believe everything you read.  Transition is hard work, and though we may feel good about various milestones and treatment decisions, it's still a long slow walk uphill. 

Be you.  Be real.  Stay connected to support and soldier on. 

Quote from: rmaddy on December 18, 2017, 12:07:25 AM
Don't sweat it.  Estrogen changes your body.  Experience changes your thinking. 

Never look for perspective in a pill bottle.  I know there are a lot of people here who speak as if HRT is instant happy sauce, but don't believe everything you read.  Transition is hard work, and though we may feel good about various milestones and treatment decisions, it's still a long slow walk uphill. 

Be you.  Be real.  Stay connected to support and soldier on.

Thank you lovely! Good advice.  :)

Much love <3

Hi Rainecloude, yes, I wouldn't sweat it.  Everybodys ride is a little different.  I'm one that got wild emotions after hrt.  However, I think much of it was personal acceptance and not fighting myself any more.  My dad told me how calm I am now and not testy.  I remember being angry all the time because of the inner turmoil.  Personal acceptance was the biggest change for me.  Then with hrt if I am more emotional, but I don't fight it either now.  I might have been capable of other emotions before accepting but fought it.

Bari Jo

My own view us that those who may have been quite in-touch with their emotions before HRT might not see much change. I was an emotional ice-cube previously, so the impact on me was big.
As always with HRT, the physical and emotional effects vary widely!

X.

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Quote from: Megan. on December 18, 2017, 05:14:39 AM
My own view us that those who may have been quite in-touch with their emotions before HRT might not see much change.

I agree with you on this.  And it was certainly true for me.  I experienced almost no emotional changes after HRT.  Throughout my life as a boy/man, I never held back my emotions and openly expressed joy, sadness, and of course anger.  Crying was never a problem for me, and I sobbed openly and often during sad movies, for example.  :)  My emotional capacity after being on HRT and now living as a woman hasn't been that different from when I was living as a man.

My emotions haven't changed much other than in curing my depression it also got rid of my anger issues.  Other than that though I don't notice much difference.


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I didn't experience a huge change either.  I know some people report it's like switching on a light and they see a huge difference overnight. 

Not me.  Over time - it's been 11 months - I can see some differences.  I am contented; I can feel joy; I am less prone to anger.  But all of those were subtle, and not noticeable day-to-day.

The biggest non-physical change is a quieting of the internal mental chatter.  I used to get unbidden mental images of violence, that were totally out of character for me, but seemed to come out of nowhere.  They disappeared.  Then my doctor adjusted my spiro down (she was worried about low blood pressure) and the images came back.  She put my dosage back on my last checkup, because my T was up - no surprise - and they went away again.

Quote from: KathyLauren on December 18, 2017, 09:41:03 AM
I didn't experience a huge change either.  I know some people report it's like switching on a light and they see a huge difference overnight. 

Not me.  Over time - it's been 11 months - I can see some differences.  I am contented; I can feel joy; I am less prone to anger.  But all of those were subtle, and not noticeable day-to-day.

The biggest non-physical change is a quieting of the internal mental chatter.  I used to get unbidden mental images of violence, that were totally out of character for me, but seemed to come out of nowhere.  They disappeared.  Then my doctor adjusted my spiro down (she was worried about low blood pressure) and the images came back.  She put my dosage back on my last checkup, because my T was up - no surprise - and they went away again.

Quote from: Deborah on December 18, 2017, 09:04:31 AM
My emotions haven't changed much other than in curing my depression it also got rid of my anger issues.  Other than that though I don't notice much difference.


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Quote from: echo7 on December 18, 2017, 08:46:19 AM
I agree with you on this.  And it was certainly true for me.  I experienced almost no emotional changes after HRT.  Throughout my life as a boy/man, I never held back my emotions and openly expressed joy, sadness, and of course anger.  Crying was never a problem for me, and I sobbed openly and often during sad movies, for example.  :)  My emotional capacity after being on HRT and now living as a woman hasn't been that different from when I was living as a man.

Thanks girls. That makes me feel much better. I guess it looks like if you're openly emotional before transitioning it doesn't change much after HRT other than maybe being a bit happier. :)

5 months for me, I was a lot more emotionally distraught before starting, simply because of the ramifications of it all, frustration with what I was trying to achieve, and so forth.  I don't quite feel like hormones provided an instant cure all, I thought I was more patient but would later find myself bent out of shape hurrying around all over again so, maybe not.

I haven't tried to dial in my dosage to achieve maximums much like some do, however.  Am going to have my levels checked in a few hours for the first time in a couple months, in fact; will have better insurance and want to work with an endo monkeying around with delivery methods/dosages more, though, so perhaps then I'll have to fend off these crying/laughing jags people talk about.  For now though I have the usual battery of HRT symptoms, so can't complain.

One thing I think HRT did to me for a few months was make me just totally friggin' exhausted a lot, or seriously unmotivated; I'd find myself just going to bed a lot, thinking that was better than trying to work on things.  Sounds like depression, really.  I'm convinced my T is kaput since the beginning of the month though (no libidio, shrunken testes, AA boobs popping up), so maybe that was the problem there?  I feel a ton more in control of what I do now, somehow. 

I find progesterone to make me far more emotional than estradiol does. I notice it big time when I'm on my cycle, but I don't mind it. Helps me be tough when it's needed.

I feel that my emotions haven't changed , but that my acceptance of who I am has made me able to emote more freely.  I don't stop myself from reflecting my true self through the natural actions that I've repressed.  I have mannerisms now that have been unchained, though they always have been there.  Freedom to be who you are is an emotional change I've experienced.
Smiles, Jessica

Count me as one that didn't experience much, if any, emotional changes. I'm about a year in.

All the best,
--AshleyP

My emotions have always been very stable on HRT. I'm somewhat more emotional, but I don't get the swings that others describe. Possibly because I've used patches, get and implants and they are fairly stable delivery methods.

Quote from: rainecloude on December 17, 2017, 11:58:29 PM
I am 7 months on HRT (estradiol + spiro - full dosage - levels are correct) and I have experienced many physical changes however my emotions have not changed as drastically as some people have suggested.

Have you checked this yourself. Some doctors have strange ideas of when the correct levels actually are, and I have heard of women being on HRT for a long time only to find out that they had extremely low levels.