Community Conversation => Transgender talk => Topic started by: Corastrasza on April 25, 2018, 05:55:57 AM Return to Full Version
Title: Am I improving or is humanity?
Post by: Corastrasza on April 25, 2018, 05:55:57 AM
Post by: Corastrasza on April 25, 2018, 05:55:57 AM
So, no big surprise, as a trans girl I find myself having intense and frequent anxiety centered around "passing". I knew since I was young that I was trans but I found it very difficult at first to gather the courage to go out there into the world as a woman. As a result, between the ages of 15 and about 23 (I'm 26 now btw) I was strictly "secret trans". Shortly after that I finally got the courage to go out and it was horrifying. I felt like everyone was looking at me all the time (and not in a good way) and I was petrified to speak to a human being. I got some pretty nasty looks early on... BUT today was just fantastic! I went all around town, full girly garb and makeup, and I only got one dirty look (but I think that guys just grumpy anyway) My point being, either I've improved my presentation alot or people are just more aware and tolerant and some are even very supportive, which warms my heart. (Also heres a pic of me just beginning (https://s14.postimg.cc/u7xyws54d/148669308367765543768001.jpg) (https://postimg.cc/image/u7xyws54d/) and heres a pic I took last night (https://s14.postimg.cc/3zmu7daq5/frech.png) (https://postimg.cc/imag/3zmu7daq5/) *edit* I have been on HRT for about 5 months now. in the first pic I hadn't started
Title: Re: Am I improving or is humanity?
Post by: pamelatransuk on April 25, 2018, 06:31:13 AM
Post by: pamelatransuk on April 25, 2018, 06:31:13 AM
I am glad you had such a fantastic day and more relevantly that things are really improving for you.
I agree also that amongst the young especially, more people are becoming tolerant and even supporting.
Nice to hear some good news!
Hugs
Pamela
I agree also that amongst the young especially, more people are becoming tolerant and even supporting.
Nice to hear some good news!
Hugs
Pamela
Title: Re: Am I improving or is humanity?
Post by: Corastrasza on April 25, 2018, 06:40:31 AM
Post by: Corastrasza on April 25, 2018, 06:40:31 AM
Quote from: pamelatransuk on April 25, 2018, 06:31:13 AM
I am glad you had such a fantastic day and more relevantly that things are really improving for you.
I agree also that amongst the young especially, more people are becoming tolerant and even supporting.
Nice to hear some good news!
Hugs
Pamela
Thank you Pamela! Hopefully more great days to come!
Title: Re: Am I improving or is humanity?
Post by: krobinson103 on April 25, 2018, 11:13:07 AM
Post by: krobinson103 on April 25, 2018, 11:13:07 AM
Initially everyone will stare as you aren't confident enough to pull it off. With time it gets easier. Eventually stuff just clicks and people just see a women. You also learn to have a thick skin and just ignore those who choose not to. Just keep doing what you are doing and it will work out fine. :)
Title: Re: Am I improving or is humanity?
Post by: Allison S on April 25, 2018, 11:28:31 AM
Post by: Allison S on April 25, 2018, 11:28:31 AM
I'm going through the same thing. Some guys will avoid me even at a bus/train,erminal where they work they appear very reluctant to answer my basic questions so that I can find where I'm going.. It's annoying I rather stay home but I have places to go sometimes.
Anyway, glad to hear you had a good day overall. You should everyday and no one should ever bat an eye especially if they don't know you.
Sent from my VS501 using Tapatalk
Anyway, glad to hear you had a good day overall. You should everyday and no one should ever bat an eye especially if they don't know you.
Sent from my VS501 using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Am I improving or is humanity?
Post by: Sephirah on April 25, 2018, 06:20:17 PM
Post by: Sephirah on April 25, 2018, 06:20:17 PM
The thing a lot of people don't realise is: It isn't how you look, it's how confident you are in how you look. That's what people pick up on. When you're walking around somewhere, people will give you a cursory glance, at the most. The vast majority have too much going on in their lives to pay too much heed to someone else.
But people do pick up on body language. It's an evolutionary thing. If someone looks furtive, and like they have something to hide... like they want to shrink away into nothingness and wish nothing more than that no one would ever look at them, then that's one of the first things to draw the eye. It's a subconscious feeling of being threatened. And that sends alarm bells ringing through the brain.
"Why is that person trying to hide? What are they trying to hide? Should I be concerned? Is it a threat to my safety?" These are the subconscious messages that go through peoples' heads. And ones that cause them to scrutinise a person more than they maybe otherwise would do.
Sweetie, you are beautiful. Own yourself. Believe in yourself. And like ripples in a pond it will radiate outwards. The way you are is equally as important, if not moreso, than how you look. Are you improving? Well, how do you feel about yourself? How do you feel within yourself? That should give you some answers :)
*extra big hug*
But people do pick up on body language. It's an evolutionary thing. If someone looks furtive, and like they have something to hide... like they want to shrink away into nothingness and wish nothing more than that no one would ever look at them, then that's one of the first things to draw the eye. It's a subconscious feeling of being threatened. And that sends alarm bells ringing through the brain.
"Why is that person trying to hide? What are they trying to hide? Should I be concerned? Is it a threat to my safety?" These are the subconscious messages that go through peoples' heads. And ones that cause them to scrutinise a person more than they maybe otherwise would do.
Sweetie, you are beautiful. Own yourself. Believe in yourself. And like ripples in a pond it will radiate outwards. The way you are is equally as important, if not moreso, than how you look. Are you improving? Well, how do you feel about yourself? How do you feel within yourself? That should give you some answers :)
*extra big hug*
Title: Re: Am I improving or is humanity?
Post by: Janes Groove on April 25, 2018, 07:18:59 PM
Post by: Janes Groove on April 25, 2018, 07:18:59 PM
Society is becoming more tolerant and that's because we are becoming more visible and fighting for our right to exist. You have the right to be here. But because society has become more tolerant, society has also become more hyperaware of physical gender differences. Estrogen is helping you a lot. But confidence goes farther than estrogen. Being 100% passable is rare today. I have found that we have to fight for every inch.